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Two little brothers decided their cat’s new litter of kittens should be baptized, so they got a nail of water and doused each kitten.  Then they decided the mother should be dunked, too, but she clawed, scratched and bit as they struggled vainly to get her into the water.  Realizing she was winning the battle, one boy said, “Oh, well, let’s just sprinkle her – and let her go to hell!”

Faith, Hope and Hilarity, -Dick Van Dyke, page 119