Help A Sister Out

Genesis

Genesis 3:1–6 KJV 1900

Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden? And the woman said unto the serpent, We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden: But of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shall not eat of it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die. And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die: For God doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil. And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.

When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food pleasing to the eye and also desirable for gaining wisdom she took some and ate it she also gave some to her husband who was with her and he ate it then the eyes of both of them were open they realized they were naked so they sewed fig leaves together to make coverings for themselves. Now I need the sisters to holler at your pastor so that all the brothers in the room can hear you. Last week I taught you to give a brother some credit this week I want to teach us to help a sister out. I want every sister in the house to say help a sister out.

Help a sister out

Our foundational text today is housed within a particular book of the Bible called The Book of Genesis. Everybody say Genesis. The word Genesis means beginning. There for the content that is contained in this book is content that exposes us to the beginning of a number of things we see the beginning of the world and we also see the beginning of the creation of the human race.

The text The Narrative records that God over a Six-Day. Incrementally creates the world as we know it now those six days. I don't want you to miss after every day he created something he pauses to evaluate what he creates and calls it good. He does it on the 1st 2nd 3rd 4th and 5th day on the 6th day he creates his most prized possession Adam. But when he looks at Adam he says it's not good for man to be alone. In other words, he's suggesting not that Adam needs company because Adam had animals in the garden and they also had God in the garden. When God says it's not good for man to be alone his saying that Adam cannot accomplish the assignment he was cosmically created for independent of some assistance. This brother need some help.

So he puts him to sleep, he becomes the first anesthesiologist and performs surgery as he becomes the first surgeon and reaches into the womb of man and pulls out a rib and then Fashions a womb man and presents her to Adam and Adam looks at her and says, this is bone of my bone Flesh of My Flesh therefore shall a man leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife and the two shall become one flesh and what God has joined together let no man put asunder. Im’ma call you Eve.

Adam names her Eve.

This is important because when God creates Eve he says these words let me make a suitable helper for the man.

So the purpose for the creation of the woman is to be a helper.

When a woman walks in the room, help just walked in the room. I need a sister to find another sister and high five her and say help is here. Yeah, when a woman walks in the room help walks in the room. You've been created a psychological, physiological, anatomically to be a helper. You got the instinct to help, it's just in you, it's embedded in your individuality. At times you have to restrain yourself from helping in areas where it's not your business to help. Some of your mother's walk stores and you see other people who can't handle their kids and you have to tap yourself on the hand say leave those kids alone those are not your kids cuz internally you suggest I just need 3 minutes with them I can straighten them all the way up please let me help you with them you've got you got the instinct to help. You've been wired to work and that is a beautiful blessing to those of us that benefit from it but it has the potential to become a problem for you because the same instinct that enables you to discern and to meet needs is the same instant that can cause you to be so obsessed with the needs of others that you don't properly tend to the needs of yourself.

Because you’ve been wired to help and this means you have a proclivity, you've got a propensity, you got a tendency to always put everybody else first.

You don't even eat first. You spent all the time cooking but you're insuring the others eat first. You think others first. That's right is admirable but if it is not balanced with a Biblical perspective that separates being selfish from being a good Steward, you will end up tending to others to the neglect of yourself.

Violating a spiritual law of the Kingdom because the kingdom works on giving and receiving. Whenever you just give and never receive eventually you're going to be operating out of a deficit because you have broken a spiritual law. Listen to me, when you break spiritual laws the laws you break break you.

When you are constantly and consistently giving yourself to people who do not have the maturity to properly discern the selfless sacrifice that you are making toward them you're going to ultimately end up overwhelmed exhausted and overworked and unproductive because the law is being violated. That's why you have to be so discern regarding who you choose to bring into your space and bring into your life, y'all aren't talking to me. You gotta be so Discerning because it takes a mature mind to properly perceive when they got something good because the immature man is infected with entitlement and whenever someone has an attitude of entitlement they cannot properly appreciate what you're giving them because they feel like it's owed to them. They treat it like a right instead of treating it like a privilege. I want a sister who knows your Worth to point at yourself and say this is a privilege. I'm not perfect but I'm a privilege. I don't have it all together but I'm a privilege. When you get me you can more than a trophy, when you getting me you getting a ride or die chick.

I'm saying because you're wired this way the helper need some help. Somebody say help a sister out. I don't just need help because of the inner me, the helper also needs help because of the enemy. Because if you look at the the enemy if you look at the creation narrative you will notice that Adam was created first but Eve was attacked first.

Am I right that Satan didn't show up until he showed up? Satan didn't come for Adam he came for Eve.Why did he come to Eve? If he said if I get the help I don't have to get the one who needs to help. If I get the one that's holding everything together, if I get the one that everybody else is leaning on I don't have to get the ones that leaning. This why this is why you have always had a Target on your back from the adversary. He wants to break you down because when you break down things break down. Did you hear me? He wants to break you down because when you break down things break down so our sister need some help.

I want somebody in the room to say help a sister out. Watch this if you would have been properly help things would not have turned out in the garden the way they turned out. What do you mean you? Genesis chapter 3 verse number 6 you see something I think is extremely significant most of us when we imagine the story of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden we envision Eve eating the fruit by herself she's alone she's by herself where's Adam? Adam not around, Adam is with the animals. When you read verse 6 you see it says when the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food a blessing to the eyes and also desirable for gaining wisdom she took some and ate it and she also gave some to her husband watch what the writer says who was with her. Adam Was Not absent, he was present and so often we focus on the man who are absent but we don't focus on the ones who a present but silent.

Adam didn't say anything. He didn't help and there and their sisters who are suffering cuz Adam isn’t helping. Daughters who are suffering cuz Daddy isn’t helping. Wife’s that are suffering because the husband isn’t helping.

I hear you I hear the brothers I hear you screaming Pastor I am helping, I am helping, I'm not saying you aren't helping but it's not your activity it's your accuracy. You got to have more than good intentions you got to be accurate.

We're learning how to treat women from everybody but women you're not talking to me and so we trust our sources are we looking to our fathers and we're looking the other men in my life and we trust them as a credible Source because we think the information they're sharing with us it's accurate. So I got to learn what kind of help she needs I got to begin by asking Eve.

Okay how can I help you? But men are wired to make request not offer assistance. Can I as opposed to How can I? I'm secure enough to know I don't know but if you teach me how to help you. If you if you teach me how to help you you'll never have to teach me again.

You gotta ask Eve but you can't stop with asking Eve. I'm going to tell you a secret I'm going to say it low so that the women can't hear us.

Eve don't always know what she won't either.Yeah let me go to this side over here since you can't just stop with Eve because Eve will confuse you.

I need you to talk to me don't talk to me. I need you to come over here stay away from me. You don't hug me I'm a need some space. Which one do you want? I want to both I just don't know what I want today. I need a sister that's honest enough to say I know I'm a mess I'm up I'm down sometimes I want you in my face sometimes I want you to leave me alone.

Sisters, we cannot read your mind because when we read one page you turn it.

When I read your mind you turn the page. I'm on one chapter you on another.

So you got to ask Eve but you can't stop with Eve.

So we got to ask the maker so the Bible says it is he that has made us not we ourselves so let's I'm not an expert on this so I to go to the maker.

RC sproul's says this I can't read God's mind but I can read God's word.

So the word gives us several ways to help Eve. for the benefit of brevity just want to give you five real quick.

Number one Eve needs attention.

Eve needs attention. Maybe Adam was present but maybe he wasn't even paying attention.So you have a daughter are you paying attention? Is she sad, is she happy? How’s she doing in school? Is she talking to a snake?

Are you paying attention?

Are you are you paying attention? Are you monitoring The rhythms of your home? If we are not careful, we can give too much Freedom too much access. Are they dipping in the stuff that they don't need to be dipping into? Do you know when to shut it down when to pull back. Are you paying attention?

Because it's hard for her to cook clean and take care of you and do this that and the other without an additional set of eyes.

Somebody say attention.

Number two: Eve needs affirmation

Watch this, when the enemy engages Eve he says to her eating the fruit will make her like God.

She wanted to be like God that's my question. Why aren't you okay being a woman? It might have been she was vulnerable for Satan's lies to who she could be because she didn't hear Adams truth regarding who she already was. She should have been so secure and who she was I don't want to be a God I like me, Adam like me, I like me and if you don't like me that's your problem. Am I making sense y'all see this is the difference encouragement speaks toward my future affirmation speaks to my present. It is the acknowledgement of what I'm already doing. The acknowledgement of who I already am. It is what Jesus received from the father when he was baptized in the Jordan after he was baptized in the Jordan the Holy Spirit descended on him like a dove and a voice of Heaven said this is my beloved Son in whom I'm well pleased God the father said this before Jesus perform one Miracle because affirmation should not be tied just to activity it should be tied to my identity.

I'm really talking to the young man here I'm talking to you you 12, 13 you old enough to feel me yeah you you going to have to do some other stuff you grown up listen to what I'm saying you can feel this.

When's the last time you just said thank you?

When's the last time you told your mom thank you?

When you pay attention, attention should always drive you to give affirmation and appreciation. Because when were paying attention you going to notice stuff that you often overlooked like y'all she had to get up super early to cook that food for me.

That she had to leave where she was and come all the way where I am to bring me something I forgot.

Where's my church?

She doesn't need it I needed it but she took time out of her day to go all the way over here to bring some all the way back over here because I need it. When you get home you should acknowledge that she had to go all the way out of your way to bring me that so I'm not just going to say thank you I'm going to acknowledge and affirm the degree of difficulty that she went through.

Fellas when's the last time you told your lady thank you?

I’m talking about the acknowledgement of the degree of sacrifice. Because when there is proper attention then you can properly assess the uniqueness of what you have. You can find a finer woman tomorrow but you can't find a better one tomorrow. Little boys want fine, a real man wants better.

You can get another one but you can’t get a better one.

Who can find a virtuous woman? Solomon says that one's hard to find. That that one whose price is far above rubies.The one where the Bible says your heart can safely trust her. She’s got you. She’s the one who was with you before you know how to put a wardrobe together.

Number three: Eve needs acceptance.

This so powerful, acceptance. Eve needs to be received for who she is not judged for who she isn't.

She needs to be encouraged to grow into a better version of herself. This is accepting people, not making an excuse for their dysfunction but it is realizing that their dysfunction is not something you should judge, it is what you've been assigned to heal.

The thing you're complaining about her maybe the thing God sent you into her life so that he could partner with you and healing the broken places that are caused by painful experiences in the past. You said I didn't break it so I shouldn't have to fix it. What if your doctor said that?

It is the doctor's job to fix what he didn't break.

You have to see your partner is more than company, you have to see them as your calling. I am called to this person I don't have the right to say yeah yeah yeah, this is my assignment and this is my calling to love them through their mess.

Watch this Tim Keller says in his book, “The Meaning of Marriage” he says that every person in a marriage should want somebody better.

What culture teaches though is that to get somebody better you got to get somebody different.

What if the better person is inside the person you are with. And instead of starting over why don't you reach inside of there and pull out that better person that's already with you.

Number four: Eve needs affection

There is power in touch. Touch communicates love.

We recently discovered that kids in a pre adolescent years need to be touched 8 to 10 times a day. Just touched.

Touch communicates love.

It's a need. It's love being conveyed without me saying I love you. It's concern, it's value, it's saying I value you, it says I'm concerned about you, it's saying I see you.

1 Corinthians 7:3 KJV 1900

Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.

1 Corinthians

1st Corinthians chapter 7 verse number 3 this is for guys. Paul says this let the husband render to his wife be affection do her and likewise also the wife to the husband so this is just like some self-help relational talk this is God saying listen, give affection he didn't say feel he said do it.

1st Corinthians chapter 7 verse number 3 this is for guys. Paul says this let the husband render to his wife be affection do her and likewise also the wife to the husband so this is just like some self-help relational talk this is God saying listen, give affection he didn't say feel he said do it.

Number 5: did you learn something today? Eve needs assistance.

Yeah you gave me attention I need that, affirmation she needs that, she needs all of it but every now and then just give me a hand.

Just give me a hand even if it's not what you do, help me do what I'm doing

because I just I just need a hand.

Sometimes she's had an overwhelming week and she may not need a hand all the time but this week she needs a hand.

Assistance, support

What does she want to do? What are her dreams?

Brothers, are you praying for her dreams? You can't if you don't know what they are.

What does she want to do that you could assist her in?

Are you just like an autopilot just doing life as business partners who pay bills together and sleep in the same bed at night?

A sister needs help.

Sisters I want you to receive help.

Because some of you of hadn't had it in so long you wouldn't even know what to do with it if it came your way.

But listen to me prophetically God is about to Usher you into a season where he's going to water the dry places.

Do you hear me? And I need you, I want to encourage you to be in a position mentally to receive help

See most of the strong women that we admire where placed in circumstances that they should not have been placed in that required them to be that strong. You're so strong but the truth of the matter is you shouldn't have had to be. But you you had to be that strong because you in a situation you never should have been in. You carry stuff you never should have had to carry by yourself. What the Bible calls the Holy Spirit is a helper. And he will help you.

He will not only help you with what you have to do he will help you with you because ultimately everyone else can help you be fixed but they cannot fix you. Only you and God can fix you.

00:44:43because ultimately everyone else can help you be fixed but they cannot fix you. Only you and God can fix you.

You are fixable.

I don't care what's happened in your life, your life can be salvaged.

You matter to Him.

You're valuable to Him.

He’ll give you Beauty for your ashes, there's there's oil for your mourning. God put that heart back together again. That that shook my confidence God help me hold my head up high again. That that made me feel rejected, Help me feel accepted, help me to believe I'm fearfully and wonderfully made.

Say I need your help

I pray for every Wounded Woman in this room who has buried years of pain and hurt and neglect. I pray for every woman who shoulders are tired because they've been carrying burdens they should not have had to carry. I pray for Revival in them. I pray that you would renew their strength. I pray that you feel them until they overflow and run over. I pray that you would awaken the eyes of people who are in their life that they would value them and see them for who they really are pray for a spirit of appreciation to rise up in their sons and in in their husbands and I pray in Jesus name father that you would just open the eyes and that you just send people into their life to encourage them and strengthen and I'll pray for healing for every broken Heart in every broken place. I pray that they leave this worship gathering different than they came in Jesus name. Thank God and Amen.