Honor your Spouse

The seriousness of Sexual Sin.

Explanation: Adultery is a sexual sin that defiles God’s perfect plan of one man and one woman for a lifetime. At the basic level adultery “is a breach of the “one flesh” relationship of marriage. It describes any act of sexual intercourse between a married woman and a man other than her husband, and all sexual intercourse involving a married man and another man’s wife or fiancée.”

Field, D. H. (1988). Adultery. In Baker encyclopedia of the Bible (Vol. 1, p. 32). Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Book House.

In other words, adultery occurs when a married person has sexual relations with someone other than his or her spouse. Fornication is sexual immorality that involves persons who are not in a covenant marriage.

Biblical Warnings against Adultery: The OT is interspersed throughout with warnings against the sin of adultery. The most prominent is found in where God explicitly forbids adultery (the 7th Commandment). The seriousness of the sin of adultery is expressed in the punishment of death (). This sin is serious because it attacks the very fabric of the home, and has disastrous results. The Book of Proverbs contains many warnings about adultery and the need for faithfulness in marriage (chapters 5 to 7). Read the text of

Read Proverbs 6:23-29

23For the commandment is a lamp and the teaching a light, and the reproofs of discipline are the way of life,

24to preserve you from the evil woman, from the smooth tongue of the adulteress.

24to preserve you from the evil woman, from the smooth tongue of the adulteress.

24to preserve you from the evil woman, from the smooth tongue of the adulteress.

25Do not desire her beauty in your heart, and do not let her capture you with her eyelashes;

25Do not desire her beauty in your heart, and do not let her capture you with her eyelashes;

26for the price of a prostitute is only a loaf of bread, but a married woman hunts down a precious life.

Proverbs 6:23–29 ESV

For the commandment is a lamp and the teaching a light, and the reproofs of discipline are the way of life, to preserve you from the evil woman, from the smooth tongue of the adulteress. Do not desire her beauty in your heart, and do not let her capture you with her eyelashes; for the price of a prostitute is only a loaf of bread, but a married woman hunts down a precious life. Can a man carry fire next to his chest and his clothes not be burned? Or can one walk on hot coals and his feet not be scorched? So is he who goes in to his neighbor’s wife; none who touches her will go unpunished.

26for the price of a prostitute is only a loaf of bread, but a married woman hunts down a precious life.

27Can a man carry fire next to his chest and his clothes not be burned?

27Can a man carry fire next to his chest and his clothes not be burned?

28Or can one walk on hot coals and his feet not be scorched?

28Or can one walk on hot coals and his feet not be scorched?

29So is he who goes in to his neighbor’s wife; none who touches her will go unpunished. ()

29So is he who goes in to his neighbor’s wife; none who touches her will go unpunished.

The NT teaching on Adultery

The message between the Old and the New remain constant. Marriage is a creation ordinance, and anything that violates God’s standard of the exclusiveness of the one-flesh union between husband & wife is sinful. Jesus not only affirms the sinfulness of adultery, He intensifies the command concerning it. Jesus begins with “you have heard that is was said to those of old, you shall not commit adultery” (), but then He follows that by intensifying the command by His own Authority by adding the element of lust. Jesus declares that not only is the actual adulterous sin act immoral, having sexual thoughts of adultery is just as sinful. Jesus moves to the issue of the heart

Jesus strips away any pretense that a person might have that he is morally superior to another who actually physically crosses a line. Jesus identifies both arenas as sexually immoral and sinful acts, each having corresponding consequences.

Before moving on, it is important to not there is a difference between temptation and the sin of lust. Some situations which cannot be avoided are presented as temptations. Our response to the temptation will determine faithfulness or sin. As an example: You are in an elevator when a suggestively-clad woman enter. The first glance is temptation; what you do for the next 10 floors will either be lust or a studied avoidance.

I have made a covenant with my eyes; how then could I gaze at a virgin? ()

I promised myself never to stare with desire at a young woman (CEV)

The consequences of Adultery

The wide-spread occurences of adultery in our society have numbed us to the consequences of this sin. We personally know people who have committed (or are still committing adultery) adultery and we think of them as good people. The personal element can lead us to downplay the seriousness of this sin. The Israelites in Jeremiah’s day were certainly not worried about the consequences of their adultery (), but God brought judgment on them. The NT confirms that adultery brings judgment, and that unrepentant adultery is a sin that indicates a person has not been regenerated ()

Adultery and Remarriage (1-32, 19:3-9;)

One final aspect of adultery is its relationship to divorce. Unfortunately divorce is becoming more and more common in our society at large. It is becoming the new normal for our young people to be the products of broken homes. While the world system has no apparent qualms about the dissolution of marriage, the Church should be standing for everything that promotes human flourishing. This means that the Church is to be a stronghold for biblical marriage and not a mirror image of the world in terms of divorce.

The focus of the 7th command is on the sin of adultery, and not the sanctity of marriage, but the two are closely related. Jesus spoke on the connection of these two issues when He was tested by the Pharisees. [The back story: two prominent rabbis had different thoughts on divorce. Rabbi Hillel taught that a man could divorce his wife for any reason, while Rabbi Shammai taught that divorce was only for serious issues] Instead of choosing sides, Jesus refers them back to God’s original design for marriage found in . The Pharisees push the point by referring to divorce certificates in the Mosaic Code. Jesus responds that the certificates were based on the hardness of hearts brought on by sin, and points back to the original design.

Jesus then comments on adultery for the basis of divorce. In and in Jesus makes what is known as the exception clause. In these teachings Jesus indicates that when a partner is guilty of sexual immorality (Greek word is porneia), the grounds for biblical divorce exist. Important Note: this is not to be automatic divorce; the heart of God is repentance & reconciliation (see especially the theme of Hosea).

Two other points: 1) porneia is a general term that covers many sexual sins and is not limited to strict adultery. 2) Mark doesn’t contain the exception clause. Jesus simply states that remarriage involves the sin of adultery (). And Paul commands the spouses to remain together, but if one does separate, “she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband), and the husband is not to divorce his wife ()

Implications of this teaching

Modern Christians do not tend to appreciate this one at all. While there are divorces that are mainly one-sided, there is generally some blame on both sides. And, when divorce occurs for non-biblical reasons, those involved generally don’t see the need to repent when they remarry, even when the sin of adultery is clearly involved. And, most who are divorced don’t pay much attention to Paul’s command not to remarry.

In the cases where adultery has been committed, there is the exception for divorce, but it is still not ideal. Again, God’s heart is for reconciliation. What I have found is that most professing Christians commit the two wrongs make a right fallacy. What this means is that when one commits sexual immorality, it somehow frees the other partner to purse another relationship, even while still married. Adultery / sexual immorality doesn’t occur in a vacuum - there are situations that lead to it. This is not condoning - even when stress / bad situations / whatever - it is never right for someone to commit sexual immorality. When it does occur, the injured party may need to pursue many things, but a new relationship is not one of them.

Application: Focus on strengthening family bonds. Be willing to fight for the marriage rather than look for ways to bail. Pray and encourage others in their marriage. Christian friends of those dealing with marital struggles should not be chomping at the bit to play match-maker!

And undue attention to the exception clause . . . risks losing sight of Jesus’ overall point that divorce is never desirable Married people should always be seeking ways to improve and enhance relations with spouses rather than wondering how they can get out of the commitments they have made. Those who divorce and/or remarry on any grounds must admit failure, repent of the sins that led to the dissolution of the marriage, and vow to remain faithful to any subsequent relationship. (The NAC, Volume 22, Matthew, by Craig Blomberg, p. 293)