D.T.R.

Define The Relationship

Start visual of Duct tape

What are you willing to give away of yourself in a relationship? (holding hands, Hugs, kiss, Etc)

Duct tape shows the affects of giving your heart away over and over. You are less connected to the person you are currently with.

God has a created design for your good, your best life, the greatest experience you can have.

You have to be willing to say no to the desires of your heart and do it God’s way, the way He created for you to experience

Your future healthy relationships take work NOW

There is blessing in doing it Gods way

Session 1 Your Relationship with God: Who are you?

God shaped and formed us from the ground

Genesis 2:7 NIV

7 Then the Lord God formed a man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.

Gen

The intimacy in this moment cannot be forgotten

Many of us have had broken relationships or been abandoned all together by fathers. Those hurts are great. How much worse if we reject our most important relationship

Romans 7:4 NIV

4 So, my brothers and sisters, you also died to the law through the body of Christ, that you might belong to another, to him who was raised from the dead, in order that we might bear fruit for God.

Romans 7:4

1 Corinthians 6:15–20 NIV

15 Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? Never! 16 Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh.” 17 But whoever is united with the Lord is one with him in spirit. 18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. 19 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.

1 corinthians 6:15-20

2 Corinthians 11:2

2 Corinthians 11:2 NIV

2 I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him.

You are not your own

“You are not your own” What does this mean to you? What does a life that does not belong to you, but to God look like?

Do you live like you are His? Your decisions, beliefs, actions; do they please Him?

Explain a covenant

Your Covenant with God: What must change going forward? how will you live? What do you want to see your relationship with God look like tomorrow and in five years?

Session 2 Parents: Do I really have to honor them?!?!

Do you want your relationship with your future spouse and friends to look like your current relationship with your parents? The way your communicate? the way your feel about your parents?

How we learn Right relationship

They were established by God, to dishonor them is to dishonor God

The way you treat your parents is the way you will treat ALL future relationships

Blessings of Parents: They are your covering (shelter or protection)

Their opinions matter

God used Neby

They teach us about all relationships good and bad

If you do not have earthly parents in your life you have a spiritual family in the church

Your parents understand more than you think about being your age… cause long long long… long ago they were

Deuteronomy 21:18–21 NIV

18 If someone has a stubborn and rebellious son who does not obey his father and mother and will not listen to them when they discipline him, 19 his father and mother shall take hold of him and bring him to the elders at the gate of his town. 20 They shall say to the elders, “This son of ours is stubborn and rebellious. He will not obey us. He is a glutton and a drunkard.” 21 Then all the men of his town are to stone him to death. You must purge the evil from among you. All Israel will hear of it and be afraid.

Deuteronomy 21:18-

Proverbs 1:8 NIV

8 Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction and do not forsake your mother’s teaching.

Exodus 20:12 NIV

12 “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.

Proverbs

Ephesians 6:1 NIV

1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.

Colossians 3:20 NIV

20 Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.

Healthy relationships teach us how to have healthy relationships with others

Men without fathers tend to seek approval from other men (gangs drugs women) To get approval

Women without fathers tend to seek approval from men (dating, sex, trying to get love they never recieved)

When you have healthy relationship with your parents you will already have approval

Covenant with your Parents: What will you do to make your relationships healthier? what will you start or stop doing? What do you want to see your relationship look like tomorrow and in five years?

Session 3 Friends and Beyond: Building your best Future

God’s made Eve I when He saw it was not good for Adam to be alone. He needed relationship and community not necessarily marriage

God was very intentional in His design, He didn’t make mistakes

We date to find a mate: how do we walk out this process godly and safely

Examples

PJ & Maddison

Pete & Cheyenne

Jordan & Mia

Q & A

Guys and Girls break up into groups

Ephesians 5:22–33 NIV

22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

Take time to pray about how God wants you to live going forward? What standards is He leading you to set for yourself and your future spouse?

Covenant in future relationship: What are you going to do to prepare yourself for your future? what will you not compromise in finding a spouse? what Character do you desire for yourself and your spouse?

What are you willing to give away from yourself before marriage? What standards will you hold before you start dating?