Family introduction-3-30-08
TITLE: How does God define Family?
TEXT: Start with Genesis 2:18-25
OBJECTIVE: The family is the first and beginning institution set up by God. It is to be permanent and unending through out all of time. God has given us all the truths we need for family matters.
INTRODUCTION:
1. This series will include:
1. Original design
2. What is marriage
a. Dating
b. Romancing
c. Courting
d. Covenant vs. Contract
Covenant—binding agreement between two or more parties
Contract—Legal agreement enforceable by law
3. What is a Family
4. Husband and Wife
5. Parenting
6. Divorce and Remarriage
7. Love, sex and marriage
8. Finances in marriage (another time)
9. Extended family (Another time) (parents, grand parents, children, Grand children)
I. Original design: Husband & Wife (and children)
A. Let’s look at the beginning:
Genesis 2:18-25 ESV 18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” 19 So out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. 20 The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. 21 So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22 And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.
B. In the Context of questions about Divorce
Matthew 19:4-6 ESV 4 He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, 5 and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
Mark 10:4-8 ESV 4 They said, “Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of divorce and to send her away.” 5 And Jesus said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment. 6 But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ 7 ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, 8 and they shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh.
C. In the Context of Daily living
Ephesians 5:28-31 ESV 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”
D. Look at the Words--Marriage is:
1. Leaving‑‑No longer has authority over, Forsake, leave, loose
2. Cleaving—To cling, to cleave, to keep close
3. One flesh—One body, one in the same
4. Naked without shame—Moral issue
a. has the idea of being open to each other
b. That openness is to be found in marriage
c. no other relationship brings the openness
d. Nakedness is shameful outside of marriage
1) Clothing is a moral issue
2) Clothing is to cover the body
3) Clothing is to modest
GEN 2:25. GEN 3:7 GEN 3:10-11. GEN 9:22-24—Noah’s nakedness
EXO 32:25. And when Moses saw that the people {were} naked; (for Aaron had made them naked unto {their} shame among their enemies:) (KJV)
Lev 18, 20
II. Marriage & Family is God's Idea
A. We have seen this already in Genesis 2
B. Commitment is essential
--Why do you want to marry that person?
--I Love them—What do you mean??
Commitment is essential in marriage
Genesis 24:58‑60 Rebekah commitment to Isaac
C. Romance is important in marriage
Song of Solomon 4:9-10. 9 “You have made my heart beat faster, my sister, my bride; You have made my heart beat faster with a single glance of your eyes, With a single strand of your necklace. 10 “How beautiful is your love, my sister, my bride! How much better is your love than wine, And the fragrance of your oils Than all kinds of spices! NASB 95
Song of Solomon 4:9-10 ESV 9 You have captivated my heart, my sister, my bride; you have captivated my heart with one glance of your eyes, with one jewel of your necklace. 10 How beautiful is your love, my sister, my bride! How much better is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your oils than any spice!
D. Marriage holds times of Great joy
E. Marriage is best for raising children (godly offspring)
Malachi 2:14-15 ESV 14 But you say, “Why does he not?” Because the Lord was witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant. 15 Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? And what was the one God seeking? Godly offspring. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and let none of you be faithless to the wife of your youth.
F. God hates divorce
Malachi 2:16-17 ESV 16 “For the man who hates and divorces, says the Lord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless.” 17 You have wearied the Lord with your words. But you say, “How have we wearied him?” By saying, “Everyone who does evil is good in the sight of the Lord, and he delights in them.” Or by asking, “Where is the God of justice?”
F. Marriage is to be permanent
Matthew 19:6 ESV So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
G. Unfaithfulness breaks the bonds of trust
Matthew 5:32 ESV But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery. And whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
H. Death is the only breaker of marriage as God designed
Romans 7:2-3 ESV 2 Thus a married woman is bound by law to her husband while he lives, but if her husband dies she is released from the law of marriage. 3 Accordingly, she will be called an adulteress if she lives with another man while her husband is alive. But if her husband dies, she is free from that law, and if she marries another man she is not an adulteress.
I. Marriage is based on practice of love and not feelings
Eph 5:21‑33
J. Marriage is a symbol of Christ and the church
Eph 5:23, 32
K. Marriage is good and honorable
Hebrews 13:4 ESV 4 Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.
III. Preparation for marriage:
A. Must be made starting back as infants
B. Children learn from parents greatly
(one reason why divorce is so devastating.)
C. I will help prepare them for marriage as much as possible
==Do you really know the other person
==What is love?
==What is the most important relationship
==Communication
==Resolving conflicts
==Godly husband
==Godly wife
==Finances in marriage
==In Laws or out laws
==What will you do with your parents when they need care?
==Proper parenting
==Sex as God intended
==Preparation for the actual wedding ceremony
IV. How to keep the love alive
A. Commitment
B. Being the mate God wants you to be
C. Determine that you will not break that vow
Ecclesiastes 5:4-7 ESV 4 When you vow a vow to God, do not delay paying it, for he has no pleasure in fools. Pay what you vow. 5 It is better that you should not vow than that you should vow and not pay. 6 Let not your mouth lead you into sin, and do not say before the messenger that it was a mistake. Why should God be angry at your voice and destroy the work of your hands? 7 For when dreams increase and words grow many, there is vanity; but God is the one you must fear.
D. Know definition of true love
JOH 3:16. For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. (KJV)
E. Know the results of Godly love
1 Corinthians 13:4-8 ESV 4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; 6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8 Love never ends. …
1 Corinthians 13:13 ESV So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.
F. Concentrate on Responsibility NOT RIGHTS
1. I am responsible to Spouse
2. I am responsible to treat her with respect
‑‑concerned about the teasing between spouses
‑‑Concerned about small acts of disrespect
V. Dating: Always potential mate-
A. Proper maturity
B. Established a standard and determined not to break them
C. Spiritually—determined to do God's will
D. Know that God owns your body
E. Purpose of a date—Know others
Have a talk with Dad—
Protection of the daughter
‑‑establish what you want in a mate
‑‑When is a person old enough to date?
==Know What God says about marriage
==Willing to follow God's truth
==Willing to loose dates in order to not break that standard
‑‑Learn how to stay pure
‑‑Find out where the other is spiritually
‑‑Must not be based on the physical
‑‑If physical becomes the foundation, all else will struggle
‑‑God's standard of human make up‑‑in that order
==Spiritual
==Soul
==Body
‑‑Satan always reverses God's order
Conclusion:
1. Family was God’s Idea
2. God created man and woman
3. When God made marriage, it is best
4. What makes up a family
‑‑When do you start a family?
==when you get married
==Not when you have children
5. God said that is not good for man to be alone, I will make a helper fit for Him.
6. To bring forth a godly seed.