06-11-06-Marriage--God's Creation
June is traditionally the month when men and women turn to marriage. Yet our country is in the middle of a battle to save the very institution of marriage as we know it. This week we have seen our Congress debating on the Marriage Protection Amendment to make marriage between one man and one woman the law under our Constitution—which sadly they did not enact. Not only do we have the horrible and ungodly practice of gay marriage, but even traditional marriage is being constantly challenged by our culture. Many feel that living together is OK because they are living as man and wife, but just don’t have the piece of paper that goes with marriage. Even many of those who are married see it as a contract, that can easily be broken if things don’t work out, rather than a covenant of commitment until “death do us part.” The fact is that marriages in the church are in just as much trouble as marriages outside the church. Today, I’d like us to look at what the scriptures have to tell us about marriage from God’s viewpoint.
We often act like marriage is an institution created by man for the good of society. If that is true, then society can change marriage to fit what it feels is correct. Unfortunately, that is what is happening today in our culture. Yet the truth is that God is the one who created marriage. So let’s go back to the book of beginnings—Genesis—and see how God set things in order. The very first mention of a marital relationship between man and woman is found in Genesis 2. To understand this relationship, let’s see what God had to say about why He created it in the first place.
¨ Genesis 2:18-24 (NIV) 18 And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; xI will make him a helper comparable to him.” . . . 20 But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him. 21 And the Lord God caused a adeep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. 22 Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He 8made into a woman, band He cbrought her to the man. 23 And Adam said: “This is now dbone of my bones, And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called 9Woman, Because she was etaken out of 1Man.” 24 fTherefore a man shall leave his father and mother and gbe 2joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
In the verses prior to this passage we saw the creation of the universe, the sun, the moon, the stars, the earth, all the creatures of the earth, and finally man. God declares that every one of these creations was “good.” Yet when we come to verse 18, we find the statement that “It is not good that man should be alone.” Was man alone? What about all the animals that he had around him? Yes, man had all sorts of animals around him, and as wonderful as a dog (or cat) may be as a companion, it is not the same as having someone of the same kind. God created every creature, even the plants and trees, after its own kind (1:11-12, 24-25). Yet, man was the only one of his kind so he did not have anyone comparable to him. Man also saw that there were male and female animals, but he was only male, thus there was an incompleteness about his nature. In fact the word alone is more correctly translated, “incomplete.” So God went to work creating a suitable companion for the man so he could be complete.
When God created man from the dust of the earth the word used is “formed”, like the shaping of a clay jar by a potter.
¨ 2:7 “the Lord God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.
But when God made woman she was “built, or fashioned” from the rib of the man.
¨ 2:21-22 So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. 22 Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He 8made (built) into a woman, and He brought her to the man.
Thus, God was not creating something totally new, but instead was using the rib as a foundation to build the woman from.
“Woman was taken not from Adam’s head to dominate him, nor from his feet to be trodden down, but from under his arm to be protected, and from near his heart to be loved.”[1]
Besides woman being an answer to the incompleteness of man, she also was created as a “helper” (v. 18 “I will make him a helper comparable to him.”). So God knew that for man to be complete he needed more than just someone of his own kind. He needed someone of his own kind who would be able to partner and contribute to his life.
“Rather than being a demeaning term, the word “helper” even describes God in Ps. 33:20 (We wait in hope for the Lord; He is our help and our shield.). The word describes function rather than worth. One does not lose value as a person by humbly assuming the role of helper. The woman was to be a help to the man: (1) as a spiritual partner to assist the man in obeying the word of God and being active in spiritual ministry; (2) as man’s partner in the divinely assigned process of procreation, in order to assure the continuation of the race (1:28); (3) as man’s friend to offer comfort and fellowship (vv. 23, 24); and (4) as man’s encouragement and inspiration. The woman is the perfect counterpart of man, possessing neither inferiority nor superiority, but being like and equal in personhood, and unique and different in function.”[2]
It is obvious from Adam’s reaction when he first saw the woman that he was pleased with God’s creation. Listen to what he said in v. 23 (NIV):
¨ “This is now dbone of my bones, And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called 9Woman, Because she was etaken out of 1Man.”
In the Hebrew man or husband is “Ish,” and woman or wife is “Ishshah.” Adam was saying that he recognized that she was a vital part of his life. So vital in fact, that he knew he was incomplete without her. She was to share in his life and to love him and be loved by him.
Now let us also recognize that woman was not made because Adam was burdened down by his work and needed another hand to get everything done. She was not made because he needed an assistant. The only reason stated that woman was created was so that man would not be incomplete. She was not created as a matter of convenience for the man, but as a matter of survival—to make him complete. This is seen in the fact that God used the method of making the woman, as an object lesson to Adam so that he would be aware of his oneness with her. Imagine if God had made her from dirt as He had man, then she would be seen as another creation and a compliment to man that God would have offered to him as a servant helper (i.e. a housemaid). But God reached into the very heart of man and pulled out the other part of the God image that was hidden there.
¨ Genesis 1:27 (NIV) So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.
In essence, man was created as an image of God, and without the female part, the image was incomplete. Now we are not talking sexually, but about in nature. God is a spirit and therefore neither male nor female, yet He has qualities that are both female and male (e.g. female—comforting, caring for like a mother, strong emotions; male—strength, order, logical). So, just as God would not be complete if He did not have all of these qualities, man needed woman to complete him.
Now that the man and woman are complete, God declares that they must leave their father and mother and “be joined, stick to, be glued” together. This is the first rule of marriage—the leaving of parents and joining together of a man and a woman. For the completeness of their lives they must be joined together. In fact, their joining is to be so complete that they become one flesh. The whole purpose as stated here is that there is no incompleteness in their relationship.
We have so misunderstood the purpose of marriage. We have seen it primarily as a means of companionship and procreation—and that is a vital part of marriage. We have also seen it as the man being as a ruler over the woman, and the woman being submissive to the man like a slave. But in reality it is both man and woman being in submission to each other and the Lord. Now here is the truth that is often forgotten--the true purpose for marriage is to illustrate the relationship between Christ and the church!
¨ Ephesians 5:21-32 (NIV) Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. 22 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, His body, of which He is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to Himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of His body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church.
“Just as marriage is public (“a man shall leave his father and mother”), intimate (“the two shall become one flesh”), exclusive and lifelong (“[he shall] hold fast to his wife”), Christ’s relationship with the church is public, intimate, exclusive, and lasting. The Lord Jesus is a faithful husband. His commitment to His bride is seen in that He laid down His life for her in order that she might belong to Him (Eph. 5:25-27). He did this even while she was an idolatrous sinner. His promise is that He will lose non of those the Father gives Him (John 6:39). His commitment to His bride sustains His love for her, even when she sometimes strays.”[3]
Just as in the old covenant, Israel was God’s bride (Jer 2; Ezek 16; Hosea 1-2) so in the new covenant the church is Christ’s bride (Eph 5:22-33; Rev 19:6-9). From what we have learned about God’s plan to bring completeness to His creation, we must also see that the relationship between Christ and the church is similar. In fact, scripture says that we are complete in Him!
¨ Colossians 2:9-10 (NIV) For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, 10 and you have been given fullness (made complete—NASB) in Christ, who is the head over every power and authority.
Not only did God desire for man to be complete, but He also wanted Him to be able to carry out the mission that God had for him to do. Just as God created a helper for Adam, He also has created a helper for the church in the person of the Holy Spirit.
¨ Rom 8: 26-27 (NIV) In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. 27 And He who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God’s will.
The Holy Spirit is our helper: (John 14:16-17; 16:7, 13) (1) as a spiritual partner to assist us in obeying the word of God and being active in spiritual ministry; (2) as man’s partner in the divinely assigned process of spiritual procreation, in order to assure the continuation of the church; (3) as man’s friend to offer comfort and fellowship; and (4) as man’s encouragement and inspiration.
When we understand marriage in the context that God designed it we can see what a blessing it truly is. God does not want us to be incomplete in our relationship to each other, nor does He want us to be incomplete in our relationship to Himself. He created the institution of marriage to provide that completeness in human relationships and to be a symbol of the completeness that comes from a relationship with Him. He also built woman to be a helper to man (not as a slave, but as an equal partner) so that together they can fulfill the mission that God has for both of them. In a similar way He was provided a helper in the Holy Spirit to partner with us so that we can do His work. This is a biblical understanding of marriage and one that is not understood by the world. Let us commit today to standing strongly in support of marriage as the institution God created for the good of man and woman.
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x 1 Cor. 11:8, 9; 1 Tim. 2:13
a Gen. 15:12; 1 Sam. 26:12
8 Lit. built
b Gen. 3:20; 1 Tim. 2:13
c Heb. 13:4
d Gen. 29:14; Eph. 5:28–30
9 Heb. Ishshah
e 1 Cor. 11:8, 9
1 Heb. Ish
f Matt. 19:5; Eph. 5:31
g Mark 10:6–8; 1 Cor. 6:16
2 Lit. cling
8 Lit. built
[1]MacDonald, W., & Farstad, A. (1997, c1995). Believer's Bible Commentary : Old and New Testaments (electronic ed.) (Ge 2:15). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.
[2]New Geneva study Bible. 1997, c1995. C1995 by Foundation for Reformation. (electronic ed.) (Ge 2:18). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.
d Gen. 29:14; Eph. 5:28–30
9 Heb. Ishshah
e 1 Cor. 11:8, 9
1 Heb. Ish
[3]“Marriage: Evangelist Sustainer of Love,” 6/1/06, http://www.kairosjournal.org.