Dale DeForest Memorial Service

Welcome (Doug?)

Welcome today as we honor and reflect on the memories of our brother, dad, grandfather, great grandfather, and friend, Dale DeForest.

Dale was born in Holly Michigan to the parents of Juanita and Walter DeForest. He died at age 84 in Sarasota, Florida after suffering respiratory arrest in January, 2019.

Dale lived most of his life in Michigan, Illinois, and Florida. He was a Jack of all trades and could repair most anything including TVs, appliances, electronics and motor vehicles. He worked as a TV repairman for many years, owned and operated two gas stations, and had his own "Buy, Sell, and Trade" store. He started driving for a trucking company and went on to own his own 18-wheeler and continued to drive for many years.

He is preceded in death by his parents; sisters, Delores and Carrie; brother, Delbert; son, Dale D. DeForest Jr. (Boomer); grandson, Richard Horner; and sons-in-law, Gary (Butch) Edwards and Gary Huff. He is survived by siblings, Darla, Marilyn, and Penny; children, Mike, Ruthie, Ramona, Jerry, Sherry, and Charlene; grandchildren, Brad, Corey, Shawn, Justin, Nichole, Amy, Jerry Jr., Adrienne, Jasmine, Matthew, Joel, Drew, and Nathan; and great-grandchildren, Ryker, Tiara, LJ, Kaydence, Kylee, Jerry III, Lincoln, Cody, and Annabelle; as well as nieces, nephews, and in-laws. What a family! What a legacy!

Dale was the father of seven children, with Linda Ulm-Rice, fourteen grandchildren, and nine great-grandchildren. He loved his family and proudly displayed "photo buttons" of them on his iconic hats. Dale, AKA “The Old Man" was always willing to lend a helping hand. He enjoyed finding bargains at auctions and garage sales, get-togethers with family and friends, and in later life, embraced technology including the internet and Facebook, and spent time fixing up boats for his dream to go out to sea. He was content living a modest life and remembered as a man who stood up for what he believed in, even if it went against the grain of society.

Prayer

“I’m hungry. I haven’t eaten since the last time.”

We can see things in our kids that remind us of Grandpa Dale. Our boys have a hint of Dale in him. Drew can fix things, Joel is really smart, is interested in a million things. Our boys repeat lines from their shows and laugh at their own jokes. Nathan is fun and gregarious but struggles with depression.

Char can remember riding in the semi truck early in the morning and stopping for coffee before he went on trips. Talking on the CB.

Prayer

Summers in Florida (Char in 3rd grade) Dale would pick up the kids from Il. They would get food stamps when they ran out of money. They would purchase things over and over and get the money back. Once he found a turtle that was hit on the side of the road. He picked it up and made turtle stew out of it and shared it with all the neighbors in the apartment complex.

Prayer

This is a space and a time of sadness as we gather to remember Dale. It’s OK to cry and allow your emotions to show. This is also a time of joy because of the impact that he had on all of us and we allow the good memories to come back to us as we share with each other what Dale meant us, so it’s OK to laugh too.

Not just a father or grandfather, but a friend.

A man devoted to family, not material possessions or wealth.

Someone with what some might say is a gruff exterior but a man with a huge heart for his kids, grandkids and for helping others.

We all have our favorite memories of Dale. I invite you to take just a moment to silently remember him in your own way with a favorite memory, a happy time shared with Dale. If anyone has any thoughts they would like to share, we’ll leave some time for that at the conclusion.

In July, 1996 Char and I drove out to California with one of her friends, our dog and a baby in the womb. We had the U Haul truck and some piece of junk Pontiac LaMans. The A/C didn’t work. With Char being pregnant and driving across the country in the middle of the summer, we needed to have that A/C fixed. Who better to fix your car than Grandpa Dale? I remember him getting on the phone and calling around for parts. “Yeah, this is Dale from DeForest Auto Body. What’s my cost on a blah, blah, blah?”

In true Dale fashion it was fixed but not exactly the way you’d think. He couldn’t quite figure it all out, but he figured it out enough to where the A/C worked, but there was a wire that ran out from the hood to the interior of the car and we drove all that way out to West Coast.

Another time he was out visiting us and we had a “boom box” with a CD player on it that was broken. I just wanted to buy a new one, but Char said “my dad can fix it.” I said fixing cars was one thing, but this was fancy technological equipment and there was no way Dale, who never went to school for that sort of thing, was going to be able to fix it. We went to the store and got a soldering gun and some solder, and he fixed it.

Matthew 25:31–40 NIV

“When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his glorious throne. All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left. “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’ “Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’ “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’

Jesus is saying that we don’t need a theological degree or fancy religious credentials to be called great in the Kingdom of Heaven. In fact, during Jesus’ life time he often was at odds with those with the fancy titles and religious offices. Dale certainly had neither of these, and to hear him start talking about what “The Man Upstairs” wanted or didn’t want might make you roll your eyes. But what Dale did have was a heart to give even if he didn’t have a lot to give. That’s exactly Jesus point, a meal, a glass of water, a change of clothes, a visit—these are the hallmarks of those whom Jesus calls his sheep, his followers.

Dale’s life has provided us with many examples worthy to be followed: a life of a man devoted to family and friends, didn’t care much for wealth and chasing after material possessions. He didn’t have much money, but what he did have he would give you if you needed it. He would drive your friend across the country, (he drove a friend of ours sister --Myra-- from IL to CA because she was older and it was hard for her to drive. Of course he wouldn't accept any money for it) and certainly would fix anything of yours that was broken.

I suggest that Dale’s life has provided us with many examples worthy to be followed: a life of a man devoted to family and friends, didn’t care much for wealth and chasing after material possessions. He didn’t have much money, but what he did have he would give you if you needed it. He would drive your friend across the country, (he drove a friend of ours sister --Myra-- from IL to CA because she was older and it was hard for her to drive. Of course he wouldn't accept any money for it) and certainly would fix anything of yours that was broken.

You’ve heard of “Hamburger Helper” How about “Turtle Helper”?

Scripture says simply: “What no eye has seen, what no ear has heard, and what no human mind has conceived”— these things God has prepared for those who love him. We have no idea about what’s in store for those who love him. We haven’t seen it, we’ve heard about it, and it’s hard to even imagine it. But these very things that are mysterious to us, these are the things God has in store for us.

There were summers in Florida (Char in 3rd grade) Dale would pick up the kids from Il. They would get food stamps when they ran out of money. They would purchase things over and over and when the value of the food stamp was greater than the item they bought, they would get the money back in cash and spend that on food and gas. On one of those trips he found a turtle that was hit on the side of the road. He picked it up and made turtle stew out of it and shared it with all the neighbors.

You all shared in Dale’s life, and your shared experiences are a treasure chest of great memories that you’ll keep and share with each other the rest of your lives. We’re still creating our memories together. We’re still living a life of choices, and decisions, words and actions, heartache and joy, work, worry, celebration. I invite us on a day like today as we recall Dale’s life and his influence on us to think about our own life—we still have a life to lead and choices to make.

Dale had an alcohol problem. He likely saw that he was on a self destructive path, that he was hurting those around him that he loved and that he wasn’t a good guy when he drank. One day he decided to quit and he made a vow to God that he wouldn’t never touch another drop and he was a sober man for 35 years. He told Linda that God could strike him dead if he ever drank another drop. What an example for us--to see yourself in a true light, not kid yourself about who you are and what road you’re on. It’s an easy path to say, “I’ll get around to it.” “I can quit anytime or I’ll take care of that later.” It takes great strength of character, wisdom, and self discipline to make a radical life change for the better, and that’s what Dale did. I wonder how his example in this area might empower you to make a positive change in your life?

We can see things in our kids that remind us of Grandpa Dale. Our boys have a hint of Dale in him. Drew can fix things, Joel is really smart, is interested in a million things. Our boys repeat lines from their shows and laugh at their own jokes. Nathan is fun and gregarious. What a legacy to see a loved one’s personality in your own family. I’m sure you see Dale in your family too.

One day our son Nathan who struggles with depressive thoughts and attitudes told us if Grandpa Dale could make a decision to stop drinking, I’m going to make a decision to beat this depression that is plaguing me. What a legacy for his family to follow. Char reflects back about her earliest memories of thinking about God and believing in him. She learned that from Dale. At a young age, she remembers Dale talking to her about God and she would ask him questions about God and where God came from. What a legacy for his family to follow. Faith, family, a giving and generous heart, a willingness to use his talents of fixing stuff to serve other people. What a legacy for his family to follow. Will you honor Dale’s memory for the rest of your life be living in the legacy? Will we live our lives in a way where we rediscover our faith and commit our lives to a live of service to God and to others?

There is an interesting parable Jesus told that really illustrates the grace and generosity of God. Jesus told them “For the kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire workers for his vineyard. 2 He agreed to pay them a denarius (a coin equal to a day’s wages) for the day and sent them into his vineyard. Around 9 a.m., the landowner went back out to the marketplace and found more workers standing around not doing anything. He said to them, go work in my vineyard. He also went out about Noon and then again at 3 p.m. and saw still more workers standing around and sent them to work in his vineyard as well. Finally he went back at 5 p.m. and saw more workers. These he put to work as well.

Char can remember riding in the semi truck early in the morning and stopping for coffee before he went on trips. Talking on the CB.

There is an interesting parable Jesus told that really illustrates the grace and generosity of God. Jesus told them “For the kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire workers for his vineyard. 2 He agreed to pay them a denarius (a coin equal to a day’s wages) for the day and sent them into his vineyard. Around 9 a.m., the landowner went back out to the marketplace and found more workers standing around not doing anything. He said to them, go work in my vineyard. He also went out about Noon and then again at 3 p.m. and saw still more workers standing around and sent them to work in his vineyard as well. Finally he went back at 5 p.m. and saw more workers. These he put to work as well.

Scripture says simply: “What no eye has seen, what no ear has heard, and what no human mind has conceived”— these things God has prepared for those who love him. We have no idea about what’s in store for those who love him. We haven’t seen it, we’ve heard about it, and it’s hard to even imagine it. But these very things that are mysterious to us, these are the things God has in store for us.

There is an interesting parable Jesus told that really illustrates the grace and generosity of God. Jesus told them “For the kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire workers for his vineyard. 2 He agreed to pay them a denarius (a coin equal to a day’s wages) for the day and sent them into his vineyard. Around 9 a.m., the landowner went back out to the marketplace and found more workers standing around not doing anything. He said to them, go work in my vineyard. He also went out about Noon and then again at 3 p.m. and saw still more workers standing around and sent them to work in his vineyard as well. Finally he went back at 5 p.m. and saw more workers. These he put to work as well.

Then at the end of the day, he said to his foreman, “call the workers. It’s time to pay everyone.” The people he hired last at the end of the day got one denarius—a day’s wage. So when the workers who had been there all day stepped up to be paid they thought for sure they would receive more, but they received the same, one denarius. They said to the landowner, “hey wait a minute we’ve been out working all day and you paid those guys the same as us.” The landowner said, don’t be mad at me because I’m generous, you received what you agreed to work for and I want to give everyone the same pay.

Everyone gets the same reward. Everyone is equal in their standing before God. It doesn’t matter if we’ve been a strong believer all our lives, we grew up in a Christian family, went to church a million times or we come to faith this very day. God simply wants us to come to him. God wants us to work in his fields, to be on his team, to live in his presence forever. The important thing isn’t when we come to him, the important thing is that we come. I think we would honor Dale if we find faith in God.

So the next time you answer the phone, maybe you can say in a gruff voice, “Yeah, This is me, is that you?”

“This is me, is that you?”

Or maybe when we sit down to eat you can announce in a boisterous tone: “I’m hungry. I haven’t eaten since the last time.”

I think that would make Dale smile.

1 Corinthians 2:9 NIV

However, as it is written: “What no eye has seen, what no ear has heard, and what no human mind has conceived”— the things God has prepared for those who love him—

55 “Where, O death, is your victory?

God has prepared amazing things. Things our eyes haven’t seen, our ears haven’t heard and our minds cannot even perceive. Things that Dale is experiencing even now. Will we join him in his faith journey?

Where, O death, is your sting?”[i]

20 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, 21 to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever! Amen.

If anyone has anything they would like to share—a favorite memory or image with Dale, we can do that now (Jasmine). Others may want to.

Slide Show

Prayer

Lunch

It’s good to come to the grave site of the ones we love. Even after today, it’s good to come visit to reflect and remember. It’s good to stand on the earth, and be reminded that death is a very real part of our life. It might help us put our life into perspective and help us reflect on how we want to live our lives—the choices we make and our own faith in God.

There’s a story in scripture where Jesus also went to the grave side of someone who he loved very much. When he was led to the graveside of Lazarus the Bible simply says, “Jesus wept.” Even though Jesus had the power to heal diseases and raise the dead, he wept. He wept for our frail human lives that must come to an end. He wept for the broken lives that are left behind feeling sad and lonely. He understood and knew the pain of the families’ loss. And then he stepped forward to reveal the glory of God and called his friend from the tomb.

We come to Dale’s grave with heavy grief and we also share the hope of our faith. We’ll miss this great man that we shared our lives with, and we’ll leave here today after we’ve said our farewells with an expectation that we’ll share life again. We’ve gathered here as a big, extended family and that doesn’t end now. We carry his memories, a lifetime of love and experiences of both sad and happy times. And we firmly believe in a great resurrection day, another family reunion around a banquet table where we’ll share life and goodness, light and love, joy, and celebration forever and ever.

Read the card verse from Mona

“‘Our Father in heaven,

hallowed be your name,

10 your kingdom come,

your will be done,

on earth as it is in heaven.

11 Give us today our daily bread.

12 And forgive us our debts,

as we also have forgiven our debtors.

13 And lead us not into temptation,[a]

but deliver us from the evil one.[b]’