Growing Pains

ME

The name Studio Elephant may not be familiar to many of you. But it’s my first stab with a group of brothers back in the 2005 to 2007 of a graphic design company. Back then, Jack, Mandrew, Claude, Kevin, another Jack and myself from my previous church entered into entrepreneurship for the first time, and we each invested money and hope to bring quality graphic design into the world. I still remember how excited we were when we got our very own ontario limited number, a document of incorporation, our own stamp, and off we go! We were going to take on the world! We were young, inexperienced, but we got heart… until of course around the same time, I was called into full-time ministry in 2006 and coursework consumed a lot more of my time then I was able to contribute. We were excited to have our first client, and our energy went up a bit. But we weren’t good with how to cap this client’s endless demands, ending up spending more time then what the job is worth, and slowly things eroded, and in October 2007 the company dissolved. By God’s grace, all of us weren’t bitter about it at the end, but there were definitely tensions as to who did what, who invested how much, and what ifs… how could we have done things differently!

WE

If you ever started anything, whether it’s a business, a small group, a project, espeically a group project, even a mission of any sort, you may have experienced this. At first everyone who rally around this common cause is really excited! It’s afterall a vision which no one has ever thought of, is going to revolutionize the way we do things, heck, it’s going to change the world. Everyone contributes equally, one might be the brain behind the operation, another the promoter, still another does the nitty gritty work, another takes a more back seated approach by funding the intiative. But like studio elephant or any other organization, there is the honeymoon period and then, personality begin to set in. It amazes me still how a group of 20 somethings can get together without any major argument or disagreement about money and who gets what share. Maybe I remember history differently, but any community, including a church, will inevitably enter into a season of growing pains after the limelight on one another wears off, and we realize our expectations are different, or maybe money is involved, or who gets the credit, or someone is not putting in their fair share, that is when we experience growing pains. What happens though when this growing pain happens within God’s church? How do we handle it?

GOD

We continue our 2 Corinthians series from where we left off, Paul had begun writing to the Church of Corinth in speaking about a relentless God, and even last week, we hinted at a possible situation which was brewing behind this letter, about a certain detour Paul took and the need to explain why he didn’t visit the church of Corinth twice as he planned, which caused the members of the church to think Paul is wishy washy about his plans. Paul maintained they can trust in the Character of the relentless God as represented by the character of His servant. His plan is a direct result of Paul’s pastoral heart, well thought out and discerned decision in the best interest of God’s will and the benefit of the church of Corinth. Paul also lays out the vision of the relationship he desires to have with the church of Corinth, this mutual boasting before the throne of grace on how the church of Corinth aided him and how he ministered and tended to them. This vision is in great jeporady and we are now going to learn what the reason is. So if you have a Bible, let’s continue to look on page 965 of the pew Bible, 2 Cointhians, continuing in chapter 1, verse 23:

English Standard Version Chapter 1

23 But I call God to witness against me—it was to spare you that I refrained from coming again to Corinth. 24 Not that we lord it over your faith, but we work with you for your joy, for you stand firm in your faith.

Paul uses rhetoric from that of a court case. He calls on God who ‘in him it is always Yes’ to be his witness for the painful truth to come out. Why did Paul changed his plan? Paul wanted to spare the church of Corinth. Spare them from what? The New Living Translation added the reason (which was not in the original Greek) for clarity. It says:

New Living Translation Chapter 1

23 Now I call upon God as my witness that I am telling the truth. The reason I didn’t return to Corinth was to spare you from a severe rebuke.

From severe rebuke! Rebuke? What’s going on? You see, this is where we need to appreciate once again what we are reading is a situational letter. It is not a theological treatise for 21st century persay, it is a letter, written to a specific audience, dealing with a certain situation, calling for instruction, direction, encouragement, even rebuke and the rawest of a pastor’s heart. Even the letter to the Romans need to be read in such a light, less we lift out of it the context and turn it into a legalistic theology textbook. Some of what happened can be traced back to the first letter to the church of Corinth, or 1 Corinthians, what was going on:

English Standard Version Chapter 5

5 It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and of a kind that is not tolerated even among pagans, for a man has his father’s wife. 2 And you are arrogant! Ought you not rather to mourn? Let him who has done this be removed from among you.

3 For though absent in body, I am present in spirit; and as if present, I have already pronounced judgment on the one who did such a thing. 4 When you are assembled in the name of the Lord Jesus and my spirit is present, with the power of our Lord Jesus, 5 you are to deliver this man to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, so that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord.

Among many other things like division in chapter 1 and 3 into factions in support for Paul, Cephas (or Peter) and Apollos, there’s pride issues, food sacrifice to idols, marriage with non-believers, is the case above. A case involving sexual immorality Paul says even pagans, unbelievers won’t venture into, between a son and his father’s wife. Paul accuses the reaction of the church to be prideful, or perhaps defending this individual in verse 2, and stated the only recourse is to excommunicate this individual from Christian association, cutting all ties with him. That’s what verses 3 to 5 is saying, about handing him over to Satan in order to win him over at the end “so that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord.” That was the plan, in fact, that’s the plan for any type of restoration, or church discipline as we like to call it. Now not every sin needs to go through such a public church discipline process. Many often can be handled between the parties involved confessing their sins, asking and offering forgiveness, and some form of restitution or reconciliation. However, this case most likely permeated the whole church. Possibly this person is prominent. Worse yet, people took sides. Some agreed with Paul and his no nonsense approach to this sinner. Others felt he may have been too harsh, and perhaps those are the ones who Paul is chastising they are even proud of defending this heinous individual. Regardless of which is the case, one thing sin always does is it creates a fissure within a community. The question is, would the church of Corinth accept Paul’s suggestion in the letter. It didn’t appear so from the beginning. Look at chapter 2, verse 1:

English Standard Version Chapter 2

For I made up my mind not to make another painful visit to you.

Another painful visit? This gives us a clue Paul indeed went to make a visit to the church of Corinth when either he haven’t heard back from the church whether they have carried out excommunicating the immoral brother. Why was it painful? Most scholars believe when Paul personally went to see the matter, he encountered great opposition and most likely form the immoral man himself that it ended badly. This is the reason Paul decided not to handle this through a personal visit. In fact, if you read further, Paul as an apostle but also as a guardian to the church of Corinth was devestated from the visit. Here we find Paul in one of his most vulnerable state:

I. GOD USES GROWING PAINS TO RESTORE BROKENNESS IN SINNERS.

English Standard Version Chapter 2

For I made up my mind not to make another painful visit to you. 2 For if I cause you pain, who is there to make me glad but the one whom I have pained? 3 And I wrote as I did, so that when I came I might not suffer pain from those who should have made me rejoice, for I felt sure of all of you, that my joy would be the joy of you all. 4 For I wrote to you out of much affliction and anguish of heart and with many tears, not to cause you pain but to let you know the abundant love that I have for you.

Does it appear Paul is softening his tone? Or perhaps his tone had never been as harsh as it was received. Paul is hearbroken by the reception he received, when ministry should be about love and joy, over these differences and disagreements, pain was the result. There is a subtle shift in verse 2 which the English would not uncover, which is “for if I cause you (plural) pain, who is there to make me glad but the one (singular) whom I have pained?” The first you refers to the church as a whole, through his visit, but “the one” is singular, a particular individual within the church who Paul had pained, i.e. urged to apply discipline on! It’s most likely the same person in . So instead of a visit, he wrote this painful letter before a possible visit to share how troubled he is that the church had either not taken it seriously and took action against “the one.” Paul mentions joy, which isn’t to say if the one is excommunicated, he would be joyful! It’s more subtle then that. If through excommunication of this immoral brother he repented, it means the church carried out his God-given prerogative as an apostle and the immoral brother now has a chance to realize the gravity of his sin, THIS would be his joy! He was sure the church of Corinth would get this. And all indications suggest later in the letter indeed they finally carried out this command. But the heart of Paul is not punishment for punishment’s sake, but even this discipline is carried out in the name of abundant love. Perhaps the affliction can be attributed to the physical persecution Paul faced, but the anguish of heart and with tears we can relate more to.

Have you ever see someone’s life spiral further and further down and you are absolutely helpless to help them? You know they made the wrong decision, yet they don’t see they have done anything wrong. They just keep carry on sinning, whatever the sin is, and maybe even to prove a point they do it to your face because they know you care about them alot! And all your words fall short to the point you become an emotional wreck, not because they didn’t listen to you (though there could certainly be a sense initially of wanting them to conform or obey what you say because you know what’s good for them) but because you know where they are heading either because you’ve gone through it before, or life and wisdom has taught you even if you haven’t gone down the same path where it would lead. All you can do is pray that perhaps they next day they might realize their wrong and turn back. I know this to be the heart of so many Christian parents. And having been a youth pastor for 13 years prior to my current role, there are days and times I wish, I plea, that those who have abandoned Jesus or live in sin would come back. Somehow your intentions are misunderstood, especially if you harden your heart, or allow the person to fall to the point of no return, and the risk it involves where only then they might remember the God who loved them and their saviour Jesus who died for them can rescue them when they have ruined their lives. Most parents, most pastors don’t want to see this, and so we often bail them out like a drug addict only to see them secretly go get their next fix... It takes a lot of risk and therefore faith to let someone freefall because you aren’t sure if it’s lethal. That’s probably a glimpse of how Paul, almost like a father to the church of Corinth, including the immoral brother, must have felt.

So while Paul’s painful letter backfired on him, he prays and hopes this letter would turn the relationship around with the Corinthians, no longer needing to take out his apostle badge to chastize them, but ultimately in verse 24 through partnership in the gospel work with Paul, they would experience joy and they would mature and develop as a community which can handle similar situation, relying solely on Jesus Christ as the measure of what is right and wrong.

II. GOD USES GROWING PAINS TO STIR THE COMPASSION OF THE ONE SINNED UPON.

He goes on further, verse 5 to 8:

English Standard Version Chapter 2

5 Now if anyone has caused pain, he has caused it not to me, but in some measure—not to put it too severely—to all of you. 6 For such a one, this punishment by the majority is enough, 7 so you should rather turn to forgive and comfort him, or he may be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. 8 So I beg you to reaffirm your love for him. 9

English Standard Version Chapter 2

5 Now if anyone has caused pain, he has caused it not to me, but in some measure—not to put it too severely—to all of you. 6 For such a one, this punishment by the majority is enough, 7 so you should rather turn to forgive and comfort him, or he may be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. 8 So I beg you to reaffirm your love for him. 9 For this is why I wrote, that I might test you and know whether you are obedient in everything. 10 Anyone whom you forgive, I also forgive. Indeed, what I have forgiven, if I have forgiven anything, has been for your sake in the presence of Christ, 11 so that we would not be outwitted by Satan; for we are not ignorant of his designs.

What’s happening here? The ‘anyone’ and ‘he’ clearly is the immoral brother. Paul says yes, while through confronting him he was dragged through the mud by him and those who support him through verbal attacks about his legitmacy as an apostle, accusing him of hurting, even splitting the church , yet Paul points away from himself as the victim and again, demonstrates his love by pointing to how the whole church was victimized by this incident. Verse 6 is even more incredible, because it appears Paul is now asking for the majority of those in the church which had managed to side with Paul to carry on the punishment against the immoral brother no longer, but to forgive and comfort him! We see Paul’s heart is all about pointing away from himself. In every way he points to the church not to worry about the pain he endured, but care for itself and also the immoral brother! Only the love of Jesus could love so self-forgetfully! This has after all been the whole point of excommunication, now that the sinner has repented resotration must come in the form of accepting him back into community not as an outcast, but to forgive means to lay whatever sinful charge he has on Christ’s cross, hearing from those he hurt “what you do is inexcusable, but I choose to forgive you” and to comfort means to tend to this wounded soul as a prodigal brother.

Paul uses this word overwhelmed which in the original language means swallowed up or devoured, that this wounded soul is swallowed up or devoured by sorrow. All of your identity is tied to your sin and there is only darkness and no light piercing through. This is what the consequence of sin, when we come to our senses and no longer flee, when we realize the people we have hurt grieviously (in this particular case the father, his wife, the community who saw him grew up, those who turned on him, those who indulged him while he was on the path of destruction), that dark place in life where you are guilty, depressed, remorseful, not able to forget the wrong you have done as it gnaws at you and reminds you how pitiful and hopeless you are, oh brothers and sisters, may we pray if and when we ever arrive at a place like that we would have someone to turn to who would not give up on us or turn away from us, but enter into our space to listen, to console, to grieve, and to encourage us back to spiritual health!

That is what it means to reaffirm your love for him! Reaffirm in Greek means a ratification of an appointment or confirmation of a sale, means official restoration into the community just as the original excommunication is an official kicking out of the individual from community. Nowadays, excommunication usually involves not allowing the unrepentant individual to take communion as being under church discipline. It is written in our constitution and by-laws under Article II: Membership, Section VIII, it reads:

Sec. 8 DISCIPLINE OF MEMBERS

Members failing to observe the basic principles of Christian faith and conduct as

Members failing to observe the basic principles of Christian faith and conduct as

outlined in Sec. 2 (b) and (c) of this Article above to such a degree as to bring

reproach upon the name of Christ and of the Church and its ministry, shall be

interviewed by the BPD to bring about repentance and correction. Only after due

notice and a hearing before the BPD, or after faithful efforts have been made

should disciplinary actions be considered. The BPD will then make

recommendation for approval by Church Council as to the appropriate

disciplinary actions to be taken, which may include suspension and termination.

Not that I wish this to ever happen to anyone, but I think as a community we should be familiar that there is a process of discipline. And there is a process to reaffirm our love for you!

Lastly, verse 9 to 11 tells us a very important truth:

III. GOD USES GROWING PAINS TO TEST THE OBEDIENCE OF HIS COMMUNITY.

English Standard Version Chapter 2

9 For this is why I wrote, that I might test you and know whether you are obedient in everything. 10 Anyone whom you forgive, I also forgive. Indeed, what I have forgiven, if I have forgiven anything, has been for your sake in the presence of Christ, 11 so that we would not be outwitted by Satan; for we are not ignorant of his designs.

Now Paul is talking about this current letter, if the first letter is to point out the issues which need to be addressed as the church of Corinth learned to leave pagan living into Christian community, and the second lost letter to which we only have snippets of what it may be about contained in what we just read which is to urge the Corinthians to carry out excommunication of the immoral brother in no uncertain terms, it was also to test their obedience to the gospel and its demands to not treating sin cavalierly and lightly. Once again, Paul affirms what Jesus once said to his disciples, that if you forgive anyone, I have also forgiven and so has my father, I paraphrased. In particular, Paul state in no uncertain term he has forgiven the immoral brother and whatever wrong he may have done to Paul personally and to the church, therefore, please take the final step of reconciliation. That’s why it was for their sake because in this forgiveness Paul has also forgiven the larger Corinthian church community of their wrongs against him and reconcile this matter (there are others as we shall see later in the series). This step is important because of another reason, that any party can be used by Satan to divide the church and jeporadize the relationship between God and Paul or God and the church. How so?

Those who like to think black and white are going to be disappointed. Satan can’t be happier than when we think in the extremes! If they never took the sin seriously, then sin just piles on and the community starts rotting from the inside until it loses any resemblance of being a pure and godly community. If however they take the other extreme and continue to lay it thick on the immoral brother, i.e. becoming extremely judgmental and legalistic, now you have a church where love is squeezed out for the sake of rules.

We as humans sometimes love to pile it on others when we discover someone elses’ sin and I always believe part of that rationale is so that we don’t have to feel as bad with our sin because by comparison, we are a lot less serious then his or her’s. In fact, I often find our self-righteous attitude kicks into high gear and we may even delight in someone struggling to find their dignity and worth, and so we pile on more accusations, and more words of condemnation. This is especially heinous when our shirvelled heart look at a situation and forget those we are criticizing and mocking at the end of the day are not a group, a label, a political or social cause, it’s easy to ridicule those ‘things,’ but they are people who God has made in his image, whom he loved and send his son to purchase and redeem and ransom their life for. Lately, the place I least want to visit is Facebook. It grieves me in whatever cause we have back our support on, that people, Christians even, have lost our basic human decency and say the most vile and horrific thing. I hope this isn’t me being complacent, or even trying to ignore the world.

YOU

English Standard Version Chapter 18

15 “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. 16 But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.

What are the growing pains in your community right now? Let us pray we would not react to them with a worldly reaction, but a compassionate response that neither ignores the issue and hides it and say “nothing to see here” nor become so energized and zealous by it that it isn’t just our self-righteous attitude being exposed. Paul has shown us God’s heart has always been a learning, growing and disciplining love, may we as MCBC be a community where grace and truth are dispensed in equal measure for the sake of love in the presence of Christ!