Marriage Matters - They Become One

Introduction

Good morning church family. Over the next many weeks, we are going to be in a series called marriage matters. There was a recent article and research done by the Pew Research Center. The title of this article was “8 facts about love and marriage in America.” Part of the article listed the top reasons why Americans wanted to marry. Love was at the top with 88%, followed by a life long commitment, companionship, and having children which came in at 49%. Interestingly the article spoke briefly as to the top three reasons that helps people stay married. 64% said having shared interests. 61% said having a satisfying intimate relationship. A whopping 56% said sharing household chores helped people stay married. Having shared religious beliefs almost made it to 50%. Shared religious beliefs came in at 47%. Other things that contributed to a successful marriage was having children, adequate income and an agreement on politics.

I understand some of these things are important to the house hold. But! I believe they should not be pillars as to why some choose to stay married. Yes, having shared interests is nice. Yes, having a satisfying intimate relationship is important. But more than just on a physical level. And, yes its a bonus when we have help with the house hold stuff. But! what about God. Where is God in the equation? God meant marriage to be so much more than just sharing something that we both enjoy from time-to-time, or our time of pillow talk or standing over the clothes washer. Although for some strange reason I enjoy laundry. But that’s not the point. God gave us the blessing of marriage.

This morning we’re about to hear the wedding bells in Eden, and we have an invitation to the first wedding!! Let’s open our Bibles to Genesis 2. Genesis 2 is where Adam was formed and became a living creature. It’s also where Adam’s wife is created. Our passage this morning opens at verse 18 through 25.

Genesis 2:18–25 ESV

18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” 19 Now out of the ground the Lord God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. 20 The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. 21 So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22 And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.

Pastoral Prayer

The Lord God says, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” It’s important to understand everything in God’s creation is good. God is not saying it’s not good that man should be alone because of either a need, crave or cry for help. “Not good” in this context “means that by himself the man could not fulfill the plan of God to be fruitful and multiply or rule and have dominion. As he began to function as God’s representative, naming the animals (2:19–20), he was made even more aware that he was alone. God had made this human as a social being, and solitude was a serious problem on several levels. The man by himself could not produce life, and by himself he would not have everything he needed to serve the living God.”

This verse does not suggest man had become lonely or that God thinks the man needs a wife, though at the conclusion of this chapter God gives him a wife. Literally, what God says about the man is that it is his “aloneness” or solitude that is not good. The man has no one “like himself” to help him, either in worship or any of the other joys afforded him in the garden. There is no one else who bears the divine image as he does. No one like him whose fellowship he can enjoy along with God’s.

The quote-unquote helper is an expression that indicates the coming helper was to be of similar nature to the man. You can consider the helper to be a supplement to his incompleteness. Another way to think of a supplement is a complement. The helper would be adapted in every way to be his co-partner, companion, his equal, and capable of satisfying his needs and instincts.

The descriptive language of the animals creation echoes the man’s creating back in verse 7. God “formed” both the man and the creatures out of the same stuff, meaning the ground. Second, the creatures are all named within three broad categories, livestock, birds and beast of the field. By going through this exercise, Adam’s understanding of the nature of the animals he named only highlighted the differences that existed between him and the rest of God’s creatures. Adam was able to understand among all these creatures there was not one who was fit for him.

Our next series of verses indicate the method of making the woman. Adam falls into a deep sleep. The terms deep sleep is often used to refer to a night’s sleep. He was out, while we have the recording of the first surgery. God was the great surgeon. God brought the woman to Adam. I like to call this the grand entrance leading up to the wedding ceremony. This is really addressed to the men in the room. If you are married, many of you will know exactly what I mean. I want you to think back to your wedding day. You might have to stretch back there, but I know you can do it. On your wedding day, can you remember to that very moment to when you saw that woman making her way to you. The sight of her radiance, her tenderness and beauty captivates your mind. As she’s making her way up you. Your eyes might even lock as she is walking, and all you could think is WOW! That’s right she’s marring this dude. Now ladies, you know your men. You know that little cute thing your man does that just makes him a super hot mess? Oh yeah, us guys … we’re doing that on the inside. We are celebrating beyond belief. The only difference is we’re keeping our manly look.

This is what’s going on with Adam when God brings here to him. Adam’s acceptance of his new partner and his delight in her are shows in three ways First, Adam’s reaction when he meets Eve is presented in what you could say as the first love song. It’s the first formal poetry in Genesis. Second, the words he speaks convey his relief that finally his ideal partner has been produced. Third, Adam declares that his partner shall be known as “Woman.” We see that right here in verse 23. “Bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh” shows the woman is the same as the man. This means human existence is a unique union of man and woman. When we stand back and take a broader look at what is going on; Adam recognizes his unique likeness in the woman.

Verse 24 talks about this union of two in marriage. I enjoy how the King James puts it:

Genesis 2:24 KJV 1900

24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

To cleave mean to be joined, stuck, fastened, keep close. This union is to be exclusive, permanent. It’s a God-sealed bond. The two have essentially been bonded with epoxy or welded. Since the two are now bonded they act as one. God’s timeless design for marriage is declared here. The one flesh relationship certainly involves an intimate union, but also includes how a husband and wife coming together in spiritual, mental, and emotional harmony. This is a picture of the two united in commitment. We cannot support anything other than one man, one woman becoming one flesh for life. That is God’s original design.

Our passage closes with a picture of innocence. Both were naked and were not ashamed. That fascinate you? They were both naked and they were not ashamed. You know why they weren’t ashamed? Well, they weren’t ashamed because they didn’t know any evil. They didn’t know any evil. They didn’t know that sexual desire could be used for wicked purposes. They didn’t know that sexual desire could be perverted and twisted. They didn’t have any wicked thoughts running around in their imaginations. They were naked, yes as not having clothing, but yet they were not. There was no need for clothing. Adam and Eve could live without barriers or needing objects to shield them. The two were completely exposed to one another in every scene. She knew and was learning without filters, as he was also.

Conclusion

This morning God has given us a beautiful picture of marriage between a man and a woman. When we look at them, they are the perfect complement to each other in every way. She brings something to the marriage he cannot, and vise-versa, he brings something to the marriage she cannot. But together they can accomplish great things with God at the center.

Husbands and wives … do you still consider your husband or wife to be a gift from God? Are you still learning about each other without filters or expectations of the world? Do you still consider each other soulmates, or do you feel like you have become roommates?

I believe every marriage can be strengthened in some way. I’d like to encourage you to be naked. Now if that means to you running around without clothes - that’s between y’all. I mean share with one another. Share your thoughts, your fears, hopes, your desires. I don’t mean share what the you think the other person might be able to share. Share with your spouse the things that you only share with God. Let no barriers exist while you keep God at the center of your marriage.

If you’ve single and praying for a husband or a wife, I’d like to encourage you to continue praying for God to show you who He desires to your mate. Don’t feel like this is something you need to rush into. Ask Him to teach you how to be a biblical husband or wife. Ask Him to show you the right one.

Closing Prayer