I Couldn’t Care More

1 Thessalonians 2:17–3:5 ESV

But since we were torn away from you, brothers, for a short time, in person not in heart, we endeavored the more eagerly and with great desire to see you face to face, because we wanted to come to you—I, Paul, again and again—but Satan hindered us. For what is our hope or joy or crown of boasting before our Lord Jesus at his coming? Is it not you? For you are our glory and joy. Therefore when we could bear it no longer, we were willing to be left behind at Athens alone, and we sent Timothy, our brother and God’s coworker in the gospel of Christ, to establish and exhort you in your faith, that no one be moved by these afflictions. For you yourselves know that we are destined for this. For when we were with you, we kept telling you beforehand that we were to suffer affliction, just as it has come to pass, and just as you know. For this reason, when I could bear it no longer, I sent to learn about your faith, for fear that somehow the tempter had tempted you and our labor would be in vain.

Introduction

True Care Opens our Eyes to Satan’s Designs

Hindered

I Couldn’t Care More

Elie Wiesel is a name some of you have heard, but probably not many. He was a survivor of the most brutal camps of the Holocaust: Auschwitz and Buchenwald, he was orphaned there, his father, mother, and sister were all killed.

In 1986 he won the Nobel Peace Prize. His new-found notoriety garnered an interview with US News & World Report when the reporter asked him to expand on a line in his acceptance speech, Yes, I have faith. Faith in God and even in His creation. Without it no action would be possible. And action is the only remedy to indifference: the most insidious danger of all.

Elie told the reporter, The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference. The opposite of art is not ugliness, it’s indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it’s indifference. Because of indifference, one dies before one actually dies. To be in the window and watch people being sent to concentration camps or being attacked in the street and do nothing, that’s being dead.

In other words, indifference means a lack of action on behalf of another. Taken biblically, love means doing, taking action on behalf of the one loved. To fail to do so, as Elie said, is to be dead already. Said another way, such person couldn’t care less.

County and Western singer, Alan Jackson, sang a song entitled, “I Couldn’t Care More”, Lately, it seems that the love that you once had in your eyes is now all but gone, ‘Cause when I reach to hold you you’re always so cold to me. Darlin' what have I done wrong. We're falling apart right in front of my eyes and it’s something I just can't ignore. Well baby, maybe, you couldn’t care less, But darlin’, I couldn't care more.

“I couldn’t care less!” When we don’t care about someone, we do not love that person. The modern notion might be, Whatever! The post-modern version might be Meh. However, as Christians, we should never be characterized by the phrase, “I couldn’t care less.” we should be characterized by the phrase, “I couldn’t care more,” another way of saying, I love you.

In our text, we see the apostle Paul couldn’t care more! He expressed his care for his new children in the faith in very that far from meh, turned into an emoji that expressed many, varied, and deep emotions. He wanted them to know how profoundly painful his forced separation from them has been. Paul’s example teaches us that to impact people profoundly, we must care for them deeply. But how do we accomplish this?

Turn with me to

1 Thessalonians 2:17–3:5 ESV

But since we were torn away from you, brothers, for a short time, in person not in heart, we endeavored the more eagerly and with great desire to see you face to face, because we wanted to come to you—I, Paul, again and again—but Satan hindered us. For what is our hope or joy or crown of boasting before our Lord Jesus at his coming? Is it not you? For you are our glory and joy. Therefore when we could bear it no longer, we were willing to be left behind at Athens alone, and we sent Timothy, our brother and God’s coworker in the gospel of Christ, to establish and exhort you in your faith, that no one be moved by these afflictions. For you yourselves know that we are destined for this. For when we were with you, we kept telling you beforehand that we were to suffer affliction, just as it has come to pass, and just as you know. For this reason, when I could bear it no longer, I sent to learn about your faith, for fear that somehow the tempter had tempted you and our labor would be in vain.

where we read, But since we were torn away from you, brothers, for a short time, in person not in heart, we endeavored the more eagerly and with great desire to see you face to face, because we wanted to come to you—I, Paul, again and again—but Satan hindered us. For what is our hope or joy or crown of boasting before our Lord Jesus at his coming? Is it not you? For you are our glory and joy.

Therefore when we could bear it no longer, we were willing to be left behind at Athens alone, and we sent Timothy, our brother and God's coworker in the gospel of Christ, to establish and exhort you in your faith, that no one be moved by these afflictions. For you yourselves know that we are destined for this. For when we were with you, we kept telling you beforehand that we were to suffer affliction, just as it has come to pass, and just as you know. For this reason, when I could bear it no longer, I sent to learn about your faith, for fear that somehow the tempter had tempted you and our labor would be in vain.

Paul desperately wanted to be with them but was unable to get there. In 2013 Barbara was visiting our daughter in Canada and I was in Aviano Italy. An F-16 crashed into the Adriatic and so my life was consumed with grief counseling and memorial service preparation. The base expected over 1,000 in attendance, it ended up being 1,200. The entire service is on YouTube if anyone cares to watch it. However, it’s not the death that is of interest here, it is the call I got from my daughter during the memorial rehearsal. She had found Barb unresponsive, the ambulance was on the way, she wanted me to talk to Barb on the phone in the chance that she might be able to hear and provide a measure of comfort.

I spoke to her until the ambulance took her away and I immediately went to the base commander and said I had to get to Canada. Not so easy as it turns out, it would be 24 hours before I could get there. I desperately wanted to be with her, but I could not. That’s the meaning behind the word that Paul uses. When I think of Paul, I tend to think of a somewhat distant scholar, but he was not, he said, “we were all the more eager with great desire to see your face.” The word translated “desire” is the same word Jesus used to speak of the Last Supper, I have earnestly desired to eat this Passover Supper with you . Christ had waited an eternity for that moment.

Thankfully, a few hours afterward, I got a call from Michelle, the hospital had stabilized her, she would be OK, adrenal insufficiency as it turned out. I stayed in Aviano, anxious for my bride to get back.

if we truly care for one another, we will want to be together.

Paul couldn’t get there, so, he did the best he could, he sent Timothy in his stead to strengthen and encourage their faith, and waited in Athens as I waited in Aviano. When Timothy returned, and told Paul about the Thessalonians’ faith and love, Paul couldn’t wait to write the letter. So, what does Paul’s example show us? First, if we truly care for one another, we will want to be together. Now, every relationship is going to hit a few snags. But one of the things that makes relational issues worse is the desire to get away from one another. You get upset, you hide your true feelings, you generalize the event into a character flaw with the other person so you hide your heart, and ultimately you hide by putting physical distance between you and the other person.

Here’s the irony, those three things, hiding true feelings, hiding your heart, and physical distance actually serve to create more conflict, not less. So, how do you have fewer conflicts? Bessel Van der Kolk, a leading trauma researcher uses a self-defense analogy, What is the best way to disable a dog intent on killing you?

Most dogs will naturally try to get at your throat, but unless you’re entirely surprised, they’re going to get a hand, foot, or arm first. A dog’s teeth are curved, designed to hold tightly when the prey pulls away, pulling away is where the damage comes from, so one must do the opposite, go with the curve of the teeth, not against them and plunge your foot, hand, or arm as far into the dog’s mouth as possible, the dog will not like this and will instinctively open their mouth wide and let go.

The same is true with trauma or conflict. Instead of fleeing, which only increases the damage, you must go straight into it. You must not hide your true feelings or your heart, you must not put physical distance, you must speak the truth in love, you must be assertive in saying what it is that you want, need, or desire.

Avoidance does not cause conflict to cease, it causes communication to cease. The more you address conflict openly, the more likely you’ll enjoy good communication and the less likely you’ll struggle with bouts of depression or loneliness.

: “But we, brethren, having been taken away from you for a short while—in person, not in spirit—were all the more eager with great desire to see your face.” Remember, Paul, Silas, and Timothy had to leave in the middle of the night because intense opposition (). The city had been set in an uproar and Jason, a new believer, was pulled in front of the crowd; in danger of death or treason. So, Paul fled, not out of cowardice, but to save the fledgling church from unnecessary persecution.

Here’s the fascinating thing, only here, one place, in the Bible, The Greek phrase translated, “taken away from you,” actually means, to be orphaned. This was an incredibly emotional and painful episode in the life of Paul.

In our text, Paul calls the Thessalonians “brethren,” and “brothers and sisters.” When we are born again, we become family! And family members usually want to see each other. I know, there are usually some members in the family whom you’d rather not be around! But God has designed the family as the basic unit of society. That’s the meaning behind Lt Col Hal Moore words before going in the Ia Drang Valley in Vietnam, They say we’re leaving home, but we’re going to what home was always supposed to be. Your family should be the place of acceptance and safety, not because you are deserving, but because of who you are.

I know everyone can’t be involved in small groups or discipleship groups for one reason or another, all entirely valid, but there is no reason not to hang out with each other for a few minutes between and after the services. Or to share a meal with one another.

Second, truly caring for one another means that our eyes are open to Satan’s designs.

2:18: “For we wanted to come to you—I, Paul, more than once—and yet Satan hindered us.” Satan is like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. We all know this, but what does it mean? If you’ve ever watched lions hunt you will recognize that they are not indiscriminate about who they attack. Often a herd of Wildebeests will occupy the same space as a pride on the hunt. Warily watching, waiting, but not cowed. The lions aren’t simply sneaking up on the first unsuspecting prey they run into, they’ve examined the herd, they look for the young, the old, the weak but most of all, they look for the one who has isolated itself from the herd. Although we may not think about it or recognize his schemes, we’re always in a spiritual battle and his primary plan is to find those separated because they are more vulnerable to his attacks.

The word that Paul uses for “hindered” is a fascinating military term. Perhaps you’ve chuckled when you heard the phrase, “Advance to the rear,” an actual order given to the 1st Marine Division at the Chosin Reservoir during the Korean War. It came from Major General Smith who said, “Gentlemen, we are not retreating. We are merely advancing in another direction.”

There was a small bridge that crossed a 20’ gap that the Chinese Army had blown up. The problem, the ground lay 1,500 feet beneath that gap and the 1st Marine Division and three Army Battalions were in danger of being overwhelmed if they couldn’t get across. It is an amazing story that I may share at another time, but suffice it to say, they spanned the gap and the living, wounded, and dead made it across.

That bridge that had been blown out, that’s what the word Paul used means. Hindered doesn’t mean that you were inconvenienced, it meant that the road itself had been obliterated.

We see some of this spiritual warfare in Daniel. He had fasted and prayed for three weeks when () finally, an angel appeared to him and said, “Sorry, but the prince of Persia stood against me for three weeks until Michael the archangel came to help.” Paul knew from the OT that while Satan can delay, and as in the case of Job, harm God’s people; however, he can only go as far as God permits.

Third, truly caring means we will be filled with joy at the coming of the Lord Jesus.

2:19-20: “For who is our hope or joy or crown of exultation? Is it not even you, in the presence of our Lord Jesus at His coming? For you are our glory and joy.” Listen, the Lord is coming again and when He does, He will reward each one according to his deeds. Paul lived daily with a view to the final judgment, it reminds me of Jonathan Edwards ninth resolution, Resolved, to think much on all occasions of my own dying, and of the common circumstances which attend death.

For the Christian, that means we will see Christ face-to-face, we will be like Him, and we will enjoy Him forever.

Fourth, truly caring for others means that we will establish and exhort one another in the faith.

That implies that our faith can be weakened and discouraged. Faith is not indeterminate hopefulness, but rather trusting in the truth of God about Jesus Christ as revealed in His word. Paul wrote, “So faith comes from hearing, and hearing by the word of Christ.” The author of Hebrews tells us, “And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him.” So ongoing faith in God, the promises of His word, the the person and work of Jesus Christ, is essential. But there’s a challenge, trials.

The reason Paul sent Timothy to establish and exhort them in their faith (), “so that no one would be disturbed by these afflictions; for you yourselves know that we have been destined for this. For indeed when we were with you, we kept telling you in advance that we were going to suffer affliction; and so it came to pass, as you know. For this reason, when I could endure it no longer, I also sent to find out about your faith, for fear that the tempter might have tempted you, and our labor would be in vain.”

As believers, we are destined for trials. Jesus could not have been clearer when He told His disciples (), “If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you.” He went on, “These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world.”

We must to teach new believers to expect trials and how to handle them lest when a trial comes it knocks them too far off center. Trials will come. So, when affliction or persecution arises because of the word, and The Word, we must courageously move forward.

Paul’s anxiety here was not born from a lack of faith, but rather it was his godly concern for all the churches (). It was the concern of a spiritual parent for his children in the faith. Some of you know this feeling. If you see a believer going through trials, come alongside them on their journey to strengthen and encourage.

For two years Elie Wiesel witnessed the horrors of the concentration camps. As he lay on his top bunk, an SS Officer beat his father on the lower bunk senseless. His father died later that night; his last word was Elie, a summons never answered. He said that was to his everlasting shame.

Elie’s life was summed up in eight words when he got to Auschwitz, men to the right, women to the left. His primary lesson out of the concentration camps can be summed up in eight words as well, Love’s opposite is not hate, but callous indifference. It is saying, “I couldn’t care less”.

Some when they hear of the cross, say I couldn’t care less, or meh. Yet on the cross, as the Son was beaten and bruised, it was his father who fell silent and in that muteness, that sacred, holy moment, that the Lord God turned from the Son He said to you and to me, I couldn’t care more. Do you know Him? Do you desire to see Him face to face? Do not let another day pass by in uncertainty.