Making Space for Parenting and Family

Time is so important

Ephesians 5:15–17 KJV 1900

15 See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise, 16 Redeeming the time, because the days are evil. 17 Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is.

Psalm 90:12 KJV 1900

12 So teach us to number our days, That we may apply our hearts unto wisdom.

Christian family Concept

A family is a group of individuals who are related together through birth, adoption or marriage and show commitment one to another in a spiritual and physical union throughout their natural life.

Families are indeed initiated by God. His intention and design of human race are to live in families. Even in Christianity, the Church is referred to as the family of God. Therefore, families are of great significance to God. “Now, therefore, you are no longer strangers and foreigners, but fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God” ().

A nuclear family can be described as a family unit that is made up of two married parents of the opposite sex and their children (biological or adopted) residing in the same household. In Western culture, a nuclear family was the norm.

However, today’s society has moved away from this model as well as the priorities order in our family from a biblical context. “So, God created man in His image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. Then God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth” ().

These days family consists of single parents, grandparents raising their grandchildren, married couples and empty nesters which contribute to a high percentage of Christian families that do not necessarily mirror the image in .

The Biblical List of priorities in life of Christian family

The main biblical priorities in life of a Christian family is God, spouse, children, mother and father, the rest of the family, fellow believers and the rest of the world. There are significant benefits when the order of priorities in our family is according the Word of God. Here is the list of priorities in life of most important life of Christian family:

Love the Lord your God.Honour your spouse.Children.Honour your father and your mother.The rest of the family.Brothers and sisters in Christ.Rest of the world.

Love the Lord your God

Deuteronomy 6:5 KJV 1900

5 And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.

We are reminded of His word that we must first love the Lord our God. “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength” (). God must come first in our families as He is the Creator of the family unit. Therefore, there are benefits to families that love the Lord; “If you keep my commandments, you will abide in My love, just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love” ().

We are reminded of His word that we must first love the Lord our God. “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength” (). God must come first in our families as He is the Creator of the family unit. Therefore, there are benefits to families that love the Lord; “If you keep my commandments, you will abide in My love, just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love” ().

Honor your spouse

1 Peter 3:7 KJV 1900

7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.

No one must take the place of God, and as such your spouse comes after God. “Husbands, in the same way, be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.” (). He is to love his wife just as Christ loved the Church (); He must love his wife as their bodies because if he loves his wife, he loves himself (). Equally, wives are to submit to their husbands, as they submit to the Lord () and show respect to her husband ().

Submission is necessary for a family relationship between husband and wife because total submission will enable those who do not obey the word to be won without a word by the conduct of their wives (). Therefore, the wife is second only to God in the priorities in life of her husband. Equally, the husband is second only to God in the priorities in life of his wife.

Children

Parents have the responsibility to raise their children in a godly fashion, guiding them in the discipline and instruction of the Lord (). states “Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it.” Children are also to obey their parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord ().

Honouring your father and your mother is the next in the priorities in life of the family. When children obey their parents, they would naturally respect others who have authority over them. Obedience to parents also brings God’s blessing for children as they obey His commands. In line with the principles of God, by honouring your father and mother as commanded by the Lord, you will see longer days, ‘and that it may be well with you in the land which the Lord your God is giving you’ ().

The rest of the family – extended family

The extended family is one that extends beyond the nuclear family and may include grandparents and other relatives.  The extended family is next in the order of priorities after honoring your father and your mother.  It is therefore important that your extended family live in line with the Word of God. “But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever” ().

Brothers and sisters in Christ

We are to serve one another in love () as we are brothers and sisters in Christ. Our actions must demonstrate the new commandment given by Jesus Christ “in that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another” ().  We are to be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you (). Love for our fellow believers eliminates us from judging one another.

Rest of the world

Our final responsibility in the priorities in life of our family is to preach and teach the gospel of Jesus. We are given the great commission to “Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you (). As we reach out to the rest of the world with the good news of salvation, Jesus said; “and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age” ().

As God is the most important priority in life of our family, He will energize us to meet our relationship priorities within as well as outside of our families.

Breakout #1

video here

Takeaways

Parenting and Children

Psalm 127:3–5 KJV 1900

3 Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: And the fruit of the womb is his reward. 4 As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; So are children of the youth. 5 Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: They shall not be ashamed, But they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.

ps 127

children are a blessing and are arrows.

Disciple making is Spiritual Parenting

Train our Children to go

Proverbs 22:6 KJV 1900

6 Train up a child in the way he should go: And when he is old, he will not depart from it.

They must be trained so they can lead. train they that they are going to have to do the things you have been doing for them. Wisdom transferred to their house.

Prepare them to go.

2. Training Requires Discipline

Proverbs 13:24 KJV 1900

24 He that spareth his rod hateth his son: But he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.

A shepherded leading his sheep to the still waters. Warn and stop them from danger.

God has given you the Word of God to guide them.

2 Corinthians 2:11 KJV 1900

11 Lest Satan should get an advantage of us: for we are not ignorant of his devices.

A the heart of discipleship is discipline.

Ephesians 6:11 KJV 1900

11 Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.

A the heart of discipleship is discipline and its not always pleasant.

They will not like it

prov 3.11-112

Proverbs 3:11–12 KJV 1900

11 My son, despise not the chastening of the Lord; Neither be weary of his correction: 12 For whom the Lord loveth he correcteth; Even as a father the son in whom he delighteth.

3. Train them along the way

Deuteronomy 6:7–8 KJV 1900

7 And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. 8 And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes.

Bible reading, church attendance .... what do they see in your house ....

4. Train them in they way they should go , and they way is Jesus.

They need Christ when they fail.

We will fail as parents and we need to run to Jesus ...

John 14:9 KJV 1900

9 Jesus saith unto him, Have I been so long time with you, and yet hast thou not known me, Philip? he that hath seen me hath seen the Father; and how sayest thou then, Shew us the Father?

We as parents also need to Go to Jesus.

Breakout 2