You have a past.

Activity | Have or Have-Not?

Let's play the Have or Have-Not Game! Give me a thumbs-up or a thumbs-down to each of these statements and let's see how we compare.

INSTRUCTIONS: Prepare a list of statements that your students may or may not have done or experienced. Each time you give a new statement, have them look around the room and ask a student or two to share more details about their answer, or have them all share with a neighbor. We'll give you a few suggestions, but feel free to come up with your own that would be a hit specifically for your group. 

"I have a hidden talent."

"I have a bad habit."

"I have never seen a Marvel movie."

"I have a crush on a celebrity."

"I have gotten a really bad haircut."

"I have never fallen in public."

"I have a few insecurities."

"I have never compared myself to others."

Admit it — you hesitated to answer some of those questions until you saw how everyone else was responding. It's okay! We all compare ourselves to others sometimes.

IT’S EASY TO COMPARE

Have you ever found yourself looking at a big, beautiful new house and wishing it was yours? Maybe you've made your own "vision board" of the kind of home you'd love to live in someday — complete with a pool, a yard, and a built-in movie theater.

Or maybe you dream about the kind of career you're going to have someday — like a famous musician, or successful producer, or wealthy doctor or businessperson. 

There's nothing wrong with dreaming, but sometimes our dreams reveal less about who we actually are, and more about who we think we need to be to compare or keep up with others.

When we walk the halls at school, or watch a YouTube video, or scroll social media, we can become painfully aware of how we compare with others. We might think . . . 

"My life isn't as exciting, successful, or fun as other people's lives."

"I'm not as interesting, popular, or attractive as everyone else."

"The real me isn't good enough."

When we feel inadequate, sometimes we even create a false version of ourselves — someone we pretend to be because we think that's better than who we really are. 

hat story you told about that cool and impressive thing you did? It was a bit of a stretch, if you're honest.That selfie you just posted? You wanted people to believe it was effortless and candid, but it took 25 takes and you had to Google "really good caption ideas" first.That joke you just laughed at? You didn't really get it, but you wanted the person who said it to like you, so you played along.We pretend to be someone we're not when we're afraid we can't measure up to all of the stuff, skills, or popularity other people seem to have.But for the next few weeks, we want to help you think about who you are in a new way. We want to help you focus less on what you think you don't have so you can better see what you already have.

That story you told about that cool and impressive thing you did? It was a bit of a stretch, if you're honest.

That selfie you just posted? You wanted people to believe it was effortless and candid, but it took 25 takes and you had to Google "really good caption ideas" first.

That joke you just laughed at? You didn't really get it, but you wanted the person who said it to like you, so you played along.

We pretend to be someone we're not when we're afraid we can't measure up to all of the stuff, skills, or popularity other people seem to have.

But for the next few weeks, we want to help you think about who you are in a new way. We want to help you focus less on what you think you don't have so you can better see what you already have.

So let’s talk about the first thing each of us has, and why that thing we all have is so valuable. You have a past.

Discussion |

What's one of your favorite childhood memories? Why do you love that memory?

In one word, how would you describe your past? How about with one positive and one negative word?

On a scale of 1-5, how comfortable are you with telling others about your past? Why?

WE ALL HAVE A PAST

Usually when you hear someone "has a past," it's not a good thing. It usually means they've got baggage or secrets. 

But we all have a past. That's just a fact. You didn't appear out of thin air just now. You have a history, and your history is a part of you.

Sometimes we don't own our past because . . .

Our story is too painful or messy.

Our story is too boring or ordinary.

Our story feels incomplete.

We want someone else's story.

If that sounds familiar, you're not the only one.

Scripture | (Summary)

In the book of Exodus (which is in the Old Testament of the Bible), we read about a guy named Moses. Here's a quick summary of Moses' life:

God's people, the Hebrews, were enslaved by the nation of Egypt.

Moses was a Hebrew baby, born to Jewish parents who were living in Egypt.

When Moses was born, the Pharaoh (ruler of Egypt) ordered all male Hebrew babies to be drowned in the Nile River because he feared the Hebrew slaves would revolt against him.

Moses' mom was able to keep Moses safe for a few months, but to save his life, she eventually placed him in a basket in a shallow part of the Nile River and waited to see what would happen.

Moses was found by the Pharaoh's daughter and raised as her own.

Moses grew up knowing he was an adopted child living in Pharaoh's palace.

He probably had a stutter.

One day, Moses saw an Egyptian soldier beating a Hebrew slave. Overcome with a sense of injustice, Moses murdered the soldier to protect the man who was a slave.

Then he ran away, fleeing the country. 

Moses' past was pretty exciting and interesting, but it was painful too.

Moses' past was pretty exciting and interesting, but it was painful too.Maybe some of Moses' stories sounded familiar to you. Maybe you resonate with his story of adoption, or his stutter, or his angry outburst.Or maybe none of Moses' story sounded familiar. Maybe your family, childhood, and story so far are all pretty average.Whether you think you share any similarities with Moses or not, there is at least one part of Moses' story that I think we can all relate to in some way: sometimes we run from our pasts. Maybe you . . .Are sometimes ashamed of your family.Wish you'd had a different childhood.Wish you had different skills, friends, opportunities, or things than you had as a kid.Are haunted by something you did, or something that was done to you.But God was about to show Moses that he had value, and so did his past. The boring parts, the challenging parts, the good parts, and the in-between parts — God was going to show Moses that no part of his past had to be wasted. God can use every part of our past for good.

Maybe some of Moses' stories sounded familiar to you. Maybe you resonate with his story of adoption, or his stutter, or his angry outburst.

Or maybe none of Moses' story sounded familiar. Maybe your family, childhood, and story so far are all pretty average.

Whether you think you share any similarities with Moses or not, there is at least one part of Moses' story that I think we can all relate to in some way: sometimes we run from our pasts. Maybe you . . .

Are you sometimes ashamed of your family.

Wish you'd had a different childhood.

Wish you had different skills, friends, opportunities, or things than you had as a kid.

Are haunted by something you did, or something that was done to you.

But God was about to show Moses that he had value, and so did his past. The boring parts, the challenging parts, the good parts, and the in-between parts — God was going to show Moses that no part of his past had to be wasted. God can use every part of our past for good.

Scripture |

We'll talk about this more next week, but here's a teaser: God used the things that happened in Moses' past to do something good in Moses' present and future.

As an adopted kid with a stutter, in a culture that was not his own, Moses likely felt isolated and different.

But God knew the things that made Moses different were valuable.

If the book of Psalms had been written during Moses' time, I think he would have really liked this passage, where the Psalmist declares that declares that God formed him with purpose and care. 

Psalm 139

Psalm 139:12–16 ESV

12 even the darkness is not dark to you; the night is bright as the day, for darkness is as light with you. 13 For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. 14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. 15 My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.

Psalm 139

Psalm 139:13–16 ESV

13 For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. 14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. 15 My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.

As an adult who let his anger at injustice lead to the death of another human being, Moses likely felt ashamed or defined by his past behavior.

But God wanted Moses to understand that God can redeem and restore even our biggest mistakes.

If Moses could have seen into the future, he might have been encouraged by the story of a man named Saul, also known as Paul. Paul was responsible for the torture, imprisonment, and death of many people, but went on to receive the grace and forgiveness of Jesus.

1 Timothy 1:15 ESV

15 The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost.

Like Moses, we must understand that we don't have to run from our past. We can find joy in the good parts and ask God to redeem the rest.

You have a past. Your past is valuable because it has helped shape who you are, but the ugly or disappointing parts of your past don't have to define who you are in the future.

Reflection | The 4 H’s

Maybe your past, like Moses, is painful or challenging. Maybe you feel shame about something you've done or hurt because of something that was done to you. Your story matters.

Maybe your past is pretty average and uneventful. Maybe you even feel some embarrassment about that, especially when we tell the stories of people like Moses. But your story doesn't need to be dramatic to be important. Your story matters too.

We can't become who God wants us to be if we don't get honest about how we became the people we are today. Knowing who we are begins with understanding our history.

We need to talk about our pasts, how our pasts have shaped us, and what God might want to do or say about our pasts. To do that, we can think about our pasts.HISTORY: Where were you born? Where did you grow up? What was your childhood like?HEROES: Who are the people that have impacted you, up close and personal? Who are the people you may have never met but consider influential in your life?HURTS: What are some challenging life events that have shaped you? HOPES: When you were younger, what did you hope for? What did you love to do? What kind of person did you want to become?

We need to talk about our pasts, how our pasts have shaped us, and what God might want to do or say about our pasts. To do that, we can think about our pasts.

HISTORY: Where were you born? Where did you grow up? What was your childhood like?

HEROES: Who are the people that have impacted you, up close and personal? Who are the people you may have never met but consider influential in your life?

HURTS: What are some challenging life events that have shaped you? 

HOPES: When you were younger, what did you hope for? What did you love to do? What kind of person did you want to become?

YOU HAVE A PAST

We can't always know why our past has happened the way that it has, but when we decide to fully understand and embrace our pasts, we can better:

Understand how our past has shaped us for the better, and thank God for it.

Understand how our past has been complicated, painful, or harmful to us, and ask God to redeem it.

And model for others how they can know, value, and still be redeemed from their pasts.

No matter what kind of past you've had, I know that God will not waste it. God wants to use every aspect of your past (good and bad) to do something beautiful in the world.

Your past has shaped you, but the negative parts don't have to define you. Your past isn't the end of your story.

Your past has value because God can use, redeem, and transform every piece of it — if you let Him.