Untitled Sermon

Ephesians 6:4 ESV

4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Fathers. As earlier, Paul begins his admonition with a negative action to avoid, followed by a positive action to develop (see note on 4:28). Paul addresses the responsibility of fathers in particular, though this does not diminish the contribution of mothers in these areas (see ). provoke … to anger. Obedient children are particularly vulnerable, so a domineering and thoughtless father’s actions would be discouraging to them (). bring them up. Parents play a crucial, God-ordained role in the discipleship of their children “in the Lord” (); see . Parental discipleship in the discipline and instruction of the Lord should center on the kinds of practices already outlined in .

As clearly denotes, a child’s obedience to his parents is pleasing in the Lord’s sight.

The child-parent relationship is not one-sided. It is a feature of Paul’s treatment of these domestic categories that the stronger have obligations to the weaker.1

1 Wood, A. S. (1981). Ephesians. In F. E. Gaebelein (Ed.), The Expositor’s Bible Commentary: Ephesians through Philemon (Vol. 11, p. 81). Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan Publishing House.

The gospel introduced a fresh element into parental responsibility by insisting that the feelings of the child must be taken into consideration. In a society where the father’s authority (patria potestas) was absolute, this represented a revolutionary concept. Paul addresses fathers (pateres) as being heads of their families. The term could mean parents in general (). Above all else, he warns fathers against goading their children into a state of perpetual resentment (parorgizete, cf. ). He is not thinking of extreme instances like disinheritance, but the everyday tensions of family life. Fathers must not make unreasonable demands. Otherwise children, being overcorrected, may lose heart ().1

1 Wood, A. S. (1981). Ephesians. In F. E. Gaebelein (Ed.), The Expositor’s Bible Commentary: Ephesians through Philemon (Vol. 11, pp. 81–82). Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan Publishing House.

88.177 παροργίζω: (derivative of παροργισμός ‘anger,’ 88.176) to cause someone to become provoked or quite angry—‘to cause to be provoked, to make angry.’ ἐπʼ ἔθνει ἀσυνέτῳ παροργιῶ ὑμᾶς ‘I will make you angry with a nation of foolish people’ Ro 10:19.1

1 Louw, J. P., & Nida, E. A. (1996). Greek-English lexicon of the New Testament: based on semantic domains (electronic ed. of the 2nd edition., Vol. 1, p. 760). New York: United Bible Societies.

  Children are a heritage from the Lord; they are to be reared for him. The verb translated “bring up” (ektrephete) has to do in the first place with bodily nourishment () and then with education in its entirety. Children are to be treated with tenderness. “Let them be fondly cherished,” Calvin urged (in loc.).

Paul goes on to mention two aspects of such domestic education. “Training” (paideia in the Greco-Roman world meant strict discipline. “Nurture” (KJV) is too weak a word. The cognate verb signifies “to chasten” but can also be used in the wider context of “instruction.” What Paul is referring to here is training in righteousness. “Instruction” (nouthesia) is correction by word of mouth. Remonstration and reproof are implied, but also advice and encouragement. Goodspeed saw here the beginnings of Christian education in the home.1

1 Wood, A. S. (1981). Ephesians. In F. E. Gaebelein (Ed.), The Expositor’s Bible Commentary: Ephesians through Philemon (Vol. 11, p. 82). Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan Publishing House.

Fathers are addressed because they represent the governmental head of the family on whom rests the responsibility of child discipline. Fathers are not to exasperate (parorgizete, “provoke to anger”; used only here and in ; cf. ) their children by unreasonable demands, petty rules, or favoritism. Such actions cause children to become discouraged (). Instead, fathers are to bring them up, that is, rear or nourish (ektrephete, “provide for physical and spiritual needs”; also used in ) them in the training (paideia, “child discipline,” including directing and correcting; cf. “training” in righteousness [] and God’s “discipline” of believers []) and instruction (nouthesia; cf. ; ) of the Lord. Children are to obey “in the Lord” () and parents are to train and instruct “in the Lord.” He is to be the center of their relationships and of their teaching and learning.1

1 Hoehner, H. W. (1985). Ephesians. In J. F. Walvoord & R. B. Zuck (Eds.), The Bible Knowledge Commentary: An Exposition of the Scriptures (Vol. 2, p. 642). Wheaton, IL: Victor Books.

4 As in , fathers (or parents) are urged not to assert their authority over children in a manner more calculated to provoke resentment than ready obedience. The verb expressing such unreasonable parental conduct is different from that in the parallel passage, but the general sense is the same. Where adds the clause “lest they be disheartened,” the Ephesians injunction recommends a better course of action: “bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” The “training and instruction of the Lord” would involve following Christ’s example, with due regard to his “meekness and gentleness” (), as well as putting into practice his precepts. And the children will the more readily learn these lessons if the parents themselves show the way—by following Christ’s example and practicing his precepts. The only other occurrence of the word “training” in the Pauline corpus is in , where inspired scripture is said to be “profitable” (among other things) “for training in righteousness.” In it appears four times in the sense of “discipline” or even “chastisement.” The word “instruction” is also used in relation to OT scripture—in , where the record of Israel’s rebellion in the wilderness is said to have been “written for our instruction.” It carries with it the sense of admonition and sometimes of warning, as in , where a factious man is to have no more time wasted over him “after a first and second warning.”

J. A. Robinson compares the injunction to a parent in Didache 4.9: “You shall not withhold your hand from your son or daughter, but teach them the fear of God from their youth up.” Only, in the NT household codes nothing is said (explicitly, at any rate) about corporal punishment.1

1 Bruce, F. F. (1984). The Epistles to the Colossians, to Philemon, and to the Ephesians (pp. 398–399). Grand Rapids, MI: Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing Co.