Dealing with Disagreements - Rom. 14:1-12
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Nicolas Bardyaev once said, “Man’s problem rises from the fact that he has not only lost his way, but he has also lost the address.”
The reality of the day in which we live is that we are surrounded with people who don’t have a relationship with Jesus. They are lost in their sin, and apart from faith in Christ they have no hope of true life today or eternal life forever.
The church is surrounded with those who are lost, but as Nicolas said, they are not only lost, but they have lost the address.
You see friend, there are a million destinations we can point people to for hope and happiness, but their is only One which will meet their need now and in eternity - and that is Christ alone.
It is to Christ we must point when we speak to the lost.
It is to Christ we must point when we are asked what we value most.
It is to Christ we must point when our lifestyles are evaluated by those who are lost and without address.
You see if we are not careful, we can point to things that are good, but have no eternal significance in the life of those who has the greatest need of a relationship with Jesus.
Valuing family is good, but Christ is better.
Valuing nature and enjoying creations is good, but Christ is better.
Valuing our community of believers is good, but Christ is better.
Christian convictions, preferences, and values are all good in their place, but Christ is better.
The culture we live in today is made up of people who are looking for where to go, and if we are not intentional with the words we speak and the actions we emphasize, it is possible to lead them to something that is good, but is outside of their greatest need which is a relationship with Jesus.
Friend we live in a post-christian nation, which means that the majority of people have gradually assumed values, cultures, and worldviews that are no longer necessarily Christian.
Therefore many would not check the box of being Christian in a poll about religious affiliation.
With that said, I heard this week a perspective that was intriguing and went right along with our passage today. Tim Lucas hinted that most people who check the religious affiliation box of none, really mean that they are done. It’s not so much that they are agnostic or atheist for lack of evidence of God in the world as much as their is a lack of evidence of God among his people.
And the conclusion I came to yesterday, mowing my grass while listening to the podcast, was the importance of being clear in the message we as believers proclaim with our lips and our lives.
we must be clear in the message we give with our lips and our lives, in what we preach and in what we prioritize.
You are in Romans 14 this morning, and Paul is continuing his letter to the church at Rome. In the first 11 chapters he taught us what to believe, and now in the final chapters of 12-16 he is teaching how what we believe manifests into how we behave.
Since the start of chapter 12, the magnitude of God’s grace through the Gospel has compelled us who have turned to Him in faith to live lives of righteousness by submitting to His leading in every area. These areas have included serving the church, living out the gospel through obedience to the word, submitting to government, and as we saw last week:
Living out my love for God involves both my relationship to people and my response to the desires of my flesh.
Instead of gratifying the wayward desires of my flesh, I am to intentionally dwell in and adopt the lifestyle of Christ. Paul said in 13:14
14 But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to fulfill its lusts.
Instead of setting up opportunities to walk in my sinful desires later on, I must intentionally “put on” Jesus.
The natural me wants to keep on the natural me, and fulfill the lusts of the natural me.
However, now that I have come to Christ by faith and believed He came to provide righteousness and life that I cannot attain on my own, I must continually pursue Him. And as I pursue Him and learn more about Him and continually submit to God’s leading in my life through His Word and the Spirit’s leading, I conform to His image. I become more like him, I am “putting on” Jesus.
Now as we grow in faith and in obedience to God’s leading, we do this in community with other redeemed sinners who are to become gradually less like their sinful, natural selves and more like Jesus.
And this community of believers is a messy organization called the Church. As we talked a few weeks ago, the church is not a building, but a group of people - we are the church. And this church is a messy organization of redeemed sinners, who (as we talked earlier) have the capacity to be off centered in our pursuits.
It is very possible to pursue good things as a church and miss the best thing. And Paul helps us here with how to deal with the disagreements that surface when differing opinions are evident.
1. The Foundation of Unity (vv. 1-3)
As Paul teaches how to deal with disagreements, he begins with the heart-level basics of unity in the church which is a spirit of receptive acceptance. He says in v. 1:
1 Receive one who is weak in the faith, but not to disputes over doubtful things.
Right off the get-go, we find this imperative verb receive. In the ESV you’ll see welcome, and in the CSB it reads Accept. In this word we find the foundational heart of unity in the church and that is receptive acceptance.
This word receive, or welcome, or accept has the idea of what we do with family or a longtime friend. Its essence is one that extends further than simple friendliness or toleration.
Paul is not calling us to put on a facade of friendliness or simply to tolerate someone. The call here is to embrace a brother or sister in Christ, knowing that this bond supersedes our past, our preferences, and our prejiduces.
Paul goes on to say, receive one who is weak in the faith, but not to dispute over doubtful things.
Here we find Paul acknowledging that the church is made up of people from a variety of backgrounds.
Life Application New Testament Commentary The Danger of Criticism / 14:1–23
As we’ve already seen, the major differences were between Jewish believers and Gentile believers. But there were other differences. Some believers were slaves, some were masters; some were wealthy, most were poor. In addition, they were all at different stages of spiritual maturity. Growing in the spirit is like growing physically—everyone grows at different rates as God works in each life. So the first instruction Paul gives the church is to accept, welcome, and love one another
In this mixing pot of various people, we find two groupings - strong and weak.
And the difference between the two is defined well in the Life Application Study Bible as:
Life Application New Testament Commentary The Danger of Criticism / 14:1–23
A person’s faith is strong in an area if he or she can survive contact with sinners without falling into their patterns. The person’s faith is weak in an area if that individual must avoid certain activities, people, or places in order to protect his or her spiritual life.
The goal of receptive acceptance in the church is mutual love and respect apart from (as v. 1 states) disputes over doubtful things, or more simply, quarreling over opinions.
We are to embrace our brother or sister in Christ without the goal of making them conform to our opinion.
This is important because Paul is not saying to brush clearly sinful or foundational theological issues under a rug. But rather, don’t allow your opinions to become an area of divisiveness within the church.
Paul says, don’t embrace someone who is not where you are so that you can argue with them.
He goes on in v. 2
2 For one believes he may eat all things, but he who is weak eats only vegetables.
While all of us are weak in some areas and strong in others, Paul here brings up a specific example within the Roman church. Whether it was those who had been saved from a Jewish background with certain dietary restrictions, or someone saved out of the pagan culture of idol worship, it is certain that differences of opinion were apparent in the church.
Mark Vroegop simplifies the issues going on in the Roman church this way:
According to verse 2 and 5, the issue surfaced as it related to dietary restrictions and the observance of certain days or festivals. Some people in the church had chosen not to eat meat or drink wine, and others saw no problem with eating meat or drinking wine.
Paul calls the non-meat eaters and non-wine drinkers “weak,” and he calls those who have no issue with meat or wine the “strong.”
These issues are classified by Paul as “opinions” and not an essential issue since both groups are said to honor the Lord in their actions (v. 6).
So this is not a clear sin issue. It could become sinful if not solidified by faith in their own heart (see v. 23), but festivals, meat, and wine were not necessarily wrong. The motives of both groups are equally commended.
Given Paul’s tone as it relates to both sides, it is clear that we are not talking about a problem of legalism like he addressed in Galatians 1:6-9 and 5:1-3. This issue was not an outright distortion of the gospel itself, and Paul’s language in Galatians was very direct and non-accommodating.
The issue is slightly different than what Paul addressed in 1 Corinthians 8 and 10, where the church was wrestling with meat offered to pagan idols. Paul uses the same principles as he does in Romans 14-15, but the issue is different.
• Take note of this principle-application because it will be helpful as we make application in our setting and context here at Fellowship.
Paul says, there are some of you who can live in situations without feeling compromised in your walk with Jesus, and there are some of you who cannot. But this difference is ok, don’t argue about it.
In fact, (v. 3):
3 Let not him who eats despise him who does not eat, and let not him who does not eat judge him who eats; for God has received him.
We find Paul here, not just addressing the external conflict of arguing. Believers and non-believers see the arguing - And Paul says don’t do it.
But he also addresses the heart-level issue that takes place before the arguing.
He says:
Don’t let the stronger brother despise the one who does not eat, and don’t let the weaker, judge the one who does.
You see, there is a tendency for those who are grounded in their liberty in Christ to despise or treat someone as a lesser (look down their nose). And there is at the same time a tendency for those who are not fully grounded in their liberty in Christ to judge or form a critical opinion of someone else.
Those who understand their liberty tend to be cynical, while those who haven’t yet fully understood and accepted their liberty in Christ are critical.
And Paul encourages both to guard their hearts!
Next week, we hope to look at the next several verses in this chapter and preface that with a lesson in theological triage. The way we each can sort through the issues of our day and biblically address our hearts in the issues.
But as we walk through this passage, it’s important to remember the words of A Lutheran theologian named Rupertus Meldenius (1618-1648) summarized the heart of Romans 14-15 with the following saying:
In essentials unity;
In non-essentials liberty;
In all things charity;
reason why we can refute the tendencies of a cynical and critical heart is because of the final part of v. 3
3 Let not him who eats despise him who does not eat, and let not him who does not eat judge him who eats; for God has received him.
God has recieved both the strong and weak believer. Therefore, we should too.
No how do we filter our emotions when addressing differences of opinion. Sometimes these are very strong emotions and ties to what we believe is right and true.
God recieves both, and so should I, but how do we do this?
Paul gives us a five stage filter in guarding our hearts and loving our faith sibling.
2. The Filter of Unity (vv. 4-12)
Paul reminds us:
A. I am not master of that person’s life, Jesus should be. (v. 4)
4 Who are you to judge another’s servant? To his own master he stands or falls. Indeed, he will be made to stand, for God is able to make him stand.
To the cynical one, you don’t own the person who isn’t comfortable with what you’re comfortable with. And to the critic, you aren’t the final judge.
God is adequate to sustain both sides of the debate on that opinion. So don’t feel like you need to be the master.
B. I need to be fully convinced in my own mind. (v. 5)
C. Both parties can honor the Lord (v. 6)
D. All of life belongs to and is for God’s glory. (vv. 7-9)
E. I am not the final judge, God is. (vv. 10-12)
My preferences should not take precedence over people. Therefore, I choose to guard my heart, love my brothers and sisters in Christ, and diligently pursue God in His Word.