Wright.Frien Wedding

You guys are the coolest nerds I have ever met. It was a lot of fun conducting your premarital counseling. Zack I enjoyed getting to know you and I hope you realize I kept all Sherry told me about Laura to myself. I figured if you didn’t know it by now, maybe it could remain hidden forever.

Did you know that the Old Testament there is no word for marriage, nor are their separate words for husband and wife in the Hebrew of the Old Testament? Additionally, there are no laws concerning marriage as an institution. There are laws concerning family relationships, but nothing concerning marriage. So we really have no idea of the marriage customs of that time.

Somewhere between the OT and NT times marriage became recognized as the cornerstone of the household. Frankly, this is probably from Greco Roman influences. Some of these Greco Roman understandings of the marital relationship can be found in the NT, not all of them popular, I might add. In those time marriages were arranged and a dowery was involved including a long betrothal period that could last years until the dowery is paid. And as lawyers, you might appreciate, that what we know of marriage at the time of Paul comes form what we would call now prenuptial agreements. This took in account dowery, and the agreement of what would happen in the event of a divorce. Quite often in the event of divorce the dowery was repaid in the form of what we would call alimony.

Now, I have said all of this to get to this point. What Paul has written here has nothing to do with marriage. Very little Paul wrote really had anything to do with marriage. There are some references to relationships within the family, but most of NT writing we use today in marriage ceremonies has nothing to do with marriage. But what they do concern is relationships within the community of human beings. What Jesus teaches us about living together with each other, interpreted by the writers of the New Testament, much of it, is quite appropriate for relationships in general and marriage in particular.

In verse 9 the literal greek is, “Love is not hypocritical” There are several greek words for love, but the word Paul uses here means self-sacrificial love. This same word is used by the other writers of the NT to name the self-sacrificial love Jesus showed for us. This kind of love is not an emotion. This kind of love is a verb. And it is understanding this kind of love, that is important to a marriage. The needs of the other should mean more to you than your own needs. This is the type of love we should show everyone, especially our spouses. Then the rest of what Paul writes explains what this non hypocritical, self-sacrificing love looks like.

Zack and Laura after spending time with you, I believe ya’ll have this kind of self-sacrificial love for each other. That is why ya’ll communicate as well as you do. Communication cannot happen unless both partners believe what the other person is trying to say is just as important or even more so then their own. If ya’ll will continually seek this same kind of love for each other that Jesus exemplified for us, your marriage will be successful. Because, this is the love that lasts long after the infatuation has worn off. This is the the kind of love that is for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, in tragedy and jubilation. It is a love that comes directly from God, that you are to share with each other. It is the love that raised Jesus from the dead, and it is the love that God intends for us to show to everyone.

Therefore, I require and charge you both, as you stand in the presence of God, before whom the secrets of all hearts are disclosed, that, having duly considered the holy covenant you are about to make, you do now declare before this company your pledge of faith, each to the other.

I assure you that if you both treasure your vows and if you endeavor to do the will of God and love as God loves, God will bless your marriage, will grant you fulfillment in it, and will establish your home in peace and gaming.