Toledot - Generations Drash

Outsiders

This week’s Parashat is Toledot. Toledot is Bereshit/. The title Toledot means generations and comes from the same word in the first verse of the portion. Several famous stories are found in this Parashat. We have the story of Esau and Jacob, the confirming of the covenant with their father Issac, Issac blessing Jacob and finally ending with Jacob going to Laban of Paddan-aram to find a wife. As I read this Parashat I was continually drawn to a specific set of verses that detail instructions from Adonai to Issac.

​Holy Scriptures: Tree of Life Version Chapter 262Then ADONAI appeared to him and said, “Do not go down to Egypt. Dwell in the land about which I tell you. 3Live as an outsider in this land and I will be with you and bless you—for to you and to your seed I give all these lands—and I will confirm my pledge that I swore to Abraham your father. 4I will multiply your seed like the stars of the sky and I will give your seed all these lands. And in your seed all the nations of the earth will continually be blessed, 5because Abraham listened to My voice and kept My charge, My mitzvot, My decrees, and My instructions.”

The part of this that kept pulling at me is the instruction to live as an outsider. Those of you that know me may be thinking to yourself “Of course it did”.

I have been an outsider my whole life. Sometimes I got it right sometimes I got it wrong.

When I was young I developed different interests from much of my friends and family. I did not have an interest in sports or popular culture. I did not care who was cool or who was setting records for physical feats. It was not long before people began to notice. I would get questions like “Would you like to get some baseball cards?” or “What do you think of this new song?”. Typically my answer would be “No thank you I do not really have a use for baseball cards.” or some such dismissive comment. This would eventually lead to curiosity. I would get asked why I did not care about sports or how could I not like this band when everyone else did. My answers were usually some kind of clever retort, or at least they seemed clever to me. Eventually I just started telling people I was weird.

At some point it became a badge of honor for me. I would introduce myself to people as being weird. I wanted to be weird. At the time in claiming to be weird I was really claiming to be an outsider. I was outside their understanding and outside their interests.

1st we have the outsider that claims to be an outsider but does not actually appear any different than any one else. Maybe this outsider knows the right words and makes the claim to stand outside the rest of the world, but their actions say otherwise. This is kind of like professing faith but not having works to show for our faith. James has a lot to say about this in his letter to the diaspora. I think verse 24 of chapter 2 sums it up pretty well.

Yet I still did the same things as most people. The reality is I was only claiming to be an outsider but I did not actually appear any different than any one else. I knew the right words to say and made the claim to stand outside the rest of the world, but my actions said otherwise. I was an outsider in word only and not in actions or deeds. One might have described me at the time as unique, special, and different... just like everyone else, that is to say I was not. Truly I was not an outsider at all I was a fraud.

​Holy Scriptures: Tree of Life Version Chapter 224You see that a man is proved righteous by works and not by faith alone.

Eventually I grew older and matured in to a teenager. As many already know a large part of the experience as a teenager is trying to balance standing out from a group while also being a part of it. I had no interest in being part of a group. The person I became choose to be different for the sake of being different or for the sake of being offensive. I began to define myself by what I was not rather than by what I was. We see an example of this with Esau at end of the Parashat in the beginning of chapter 28.

I was an outsider in word only and not in actions or deeds. One might describe this outsider as unique, special, and different... just like everyone else, that is to say they are not. This is not the type of outsider we are called to be.2nd we have the outsider that is like Esau. This is the person that choose to be different for the sake of being different or for the sake of being offensive. This is the person that does not stand for things they stand against things. To say it another way this person defines themselves not by what they are and instead by what they are not. We see an example of this with Esau at end of the Parashat in the beginning of chapter 28.

2nd we have the outsider that is like Esau. This is the person that choose to be different for the sake of being different or for the sake of being offensive. This is the person that does not stand for things they stand against things. To say it another way this person defines themselves not by what they are and instead by what they are not. We see an example of this with Esau at end of the Parashat in the beginning of chapter 28.

​Holy Scriptures: Tree of Life Version Chapter 287Jacob listened to his father Isaac and to his mother and went toward Paddan-aram. 8Then Esau saw that the daughters of Canaan were contemptible in his father Isaac’s eyes. 9So Esau went to Ishmael and took Mahalath, the daughter of Ishmael Abraham’s son, Nebaioth’s sister for his wife, besides his other wives.

The type of outsider I had become was the same as Esau. I was not an outsider. I was rebellious.

​Holy Scriptures: Tree of Life Version Chapter 215Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. 16For everything in the world—the desire of the flesh, the desire of the eyes, and the boasting of life—is not from the Father but from the world.

When I was 16 the Ruach Kodesh convicted me of my rebelliousness. It was almost like a conversation. I was called to account for who I was, the only answers I could think of was who I was not. In the end I can remember feebly thinking to myself I am a child of God. The response was what does that mean? I could easily answer one who loves the Lord and who loves others. Then it hit me, I did not love others. I looked at people as obstacles to my faith and experiences in this life. I had to repent of that.

Shortly after getting married and having a daughter, I arrived at a point where I was missing the mark in my faith. I followed the big 10 commandments. I did not cheat on my wife, I was not a thief, and I loved my neighbor. Still something was missing as I was incomplete in in my pursuit of living as Yeshua lived. Through a lot of prayer and inspiration of the Ruach Kodesh my eyes started to open to a way of life that would lead me to be closer to my God and King.

Shortly

While studying the scriptures I came upon a series of verses that hit the heart of what was missing in my life.

Through a lot of prayer and inspiration of the Ruach Kodesh my eyes started to open to a way of life that would lead me to be closer to my God and King. As my study of Torah and all of the scriptures continued so to did my desire to obey them. Of course Torah observance definitely made me an outsider to much of the world and the groups I was a part of. Some times it was hard. Family members did not understand why we choose to live as we do.

Living as an outsider due to obedience to our heavenly father has been hard at times. Yet we have recieved encouragement. One of the verses I often think of is found in 1 John 2:3-6

1 John 2:3-6

​Holy Scriptures: Tree of Life Version Chapter 23Now we know that we have come to know Him by this—if we keep His commandments. 4The one who says, “I have come to know Him,” and does not keep His commandments is a liar, and the truth is not in him. 5But whoever keeps His word, in him the love of God is truly made perfect. We know that we are in Him by this— 6whoever claims to abide in Him must walk just as He walked.

I am a true outsider today. Not an outsider because I purposefully choose to be different but because I choose to be like our master Yeshua. Sometimes that choice is hard and sometimes it is easy.

As my study of Torah and all of the scriptures continued so to did my desire to obey them. This has definitely made me an outsider to much of the world and the groups I was a part of. Some times it was hard. Some family members still do not understand why we choose to live as we do. Some times it was easy, who does not like having a day of rest to relax every week.

The type of outsider we have become is called a child of Adonai. We are an outsider not because we abandoned the world but because we love and obey the Heavenly Father, through the example set by Yeshua. What this means is we live as an outsider of the world’s cultures and societies. We live as a child of Adonai and our home is in the world to come.

The type of outsider we have become is called a child of Adonai. We are an outsider not because we abandoned the world but because we love and obey the Heavenly Father, through the example set by Yeshua. What this means is we live as an outsider of the world’s cultures and societies. We live as a child of Adonai and our home is in the world to come.