1 CORINTHIANS 7 PT 1

LAST WEEK

We looked at issues that Paul had been told about

News had gotten to him about certain things that were happening within the Church

Issues that dealt with Christian Ethic, Sexual Behaviors, and dealing with civil issues.

THIS WEEK

Paul is going to confront the contents of the Letter the Corinthians wrote to Paul

In this Letter, The Corinthian Church asks Paul about various different issues.

Issues that concerned them as followers of Christ

Issues that they had questions about

Issues that could make or break the testimony of this church.

QUESTION FOR US:

Sex does not have a singular purpose.

Sex was not created for the singular purpose of multiplying, but to be fruitful

One thing that is fascinating to me, is how Adam and Eve figured it out.

All they were giving was “Be Fruitful and Multiply”

Somehow, they got it done.

Today, we have manuals, novels, and even state funded initiatives trying to educate our children.

What does Sexual Health look like for the Christian?

Should we not talk about it?

Should we just let each other figure it out?

Or is there something in scripture that guides our sexuality as Followers of Christ?

TURN TO

1 Corinthians 7 NKJV

1 Now concerning the things of which you wrote to me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. 2 Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. 3 Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. 4 The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5 Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 6 But I say this as a concession, not as a commandment. 7 For I wish that all men were even as I myself. But each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that. 8 But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am; 9 but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. 10 Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. 11 But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife. 12 But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. 13 And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy. 15 But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace. 16 For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife? 17 But as God has distributed to each one, as the Lord has called each one, so let him walk. And so I ordain in all the churches. 18 Was anyone called while circumcised? Let him not become uncircumcised. Was anyone called while uncircumcised? Let him not be circumcised. 19 Circumcision is nothing and uncircumcision is nothing, but keeping the commandments of God is what matters. 20 Let each one remain in the same calling in which he was called. 21 Were you called while a slave? Do not be concerned about it; but if you can be made free, rather use it. 22 For he who is called in the Lord while a slave is the Lord’s freedman. Likewise he who is called while free is Christ’s slave. 23 You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men. 24 Brethren, let each one remain with God in that state in which he was called. 25 Now concerning virgins: I have no commandment from the Lord; yet I give judgment as one whom the Lord in His mercy has made trustworthy. 26 I suppose therefore that this is good because of the present distress—that it is good for a man to remain as he is: 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be loosed. Are you loosed from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But even if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. Nevertheless such will have trouble in the flesh, but I would spare you. 29 But this I say, brethren, the time is short, so that from now on even those who have wives should be as though they had none, 30 those who weep as though they did not weep, those who rejoice as though they did not rejoice, those who buy as though they did not possess, 31 and those who use this world as not misusing it. For the form of this world is passing away. 32 But I want you to be without care. He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord—how he may please the Lord. 33 But he who is married cares about the things of the world—how he may please his wife. 34 There is a difference between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world—how she may please her husband. 35 And this I say for your own profit, not that I may put a leash on you, but for what is proper, and that you may serve the Lord without distraction. 36 But if any man thinks he is behaving improperly toward his virgin, if she is past the flower of youth, and thus it must be, let him do what he wishes. He does not sin; let them marry. 37 Nevertheless he who stands steadfast in his heart, having no necessity, but has power over his own will, and has so determined in his heart that he will keep his virgin, does well. 38 So then he who gives her in marriage does well, but he who does not give her in marriage does better. 39 A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. 40 But she is happier if she remains as she is, according to my judgment—and I think I also have the Spirit of God.

PRAY

1 cor 7:1-

1 Corinthians 7:1 NKJV

1 Now concerning the things of which you wrote to me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman.

The Question the Corinthian church wanted to know more about was regarding Celibacy:

Should

“Is it good for a man not to touch a woman”

AKA Is it better for a man to live a celibate life?

This is a question that most men don’t ask themselves.

In fact, most Christian Men ask the question, “When will I get married?” instead of “Is Marriage in the cards for me?”

Sometimes, the Christian Culture makes marriage out to be a mandatory mark of a Christian.

The sad part is, it becomes such a major life event, that it sometimes devalues Singleness.

We have made one to seem better than the other.

But Paul finds value in both as a Single Man.

1 Corinthians 7:2–3 NKJV

2 Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. 3 Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband.

In the Bible we have two great examples of people who lived powerful Single Lives.

One wrote most of the New Testament, and the other was the Protagonist of the New Testament.

AKA Paul and Jesus.

IN VERSE 1 PAUL STATES THAT CELIBACY IS GOOD

IT’S NOT SOMETHING TO BE LOOKED DOWN UPON

IT’S NOT SOMETHING TO BE DEVALUED

PAUL SAYS “IT IS GOOD...”

BUT IF YOU CAN’T DEAL

IF YOU BELIEVE THAT CELIBACY IS NOT FOR YOU, WHAT DOES YOUR SEXUAL IDENTITY LOOK LIKE?

FRIENDS, IF CELIBACY SEEMS IMPOSSIBLE FOR YOU, WHAT ARE YOU DOING TODAY TO PREPARE YOURSELF FOR MARRIAGE?

If you don’t have self control now

How will you have self control when your spouse and you are not on the same page?

If you aren’t faithful to Jesus now

How will you lead your spouse and children in faithfulness?

If you can’t flee sexual immorality now

How will you flee sexual immorality when you are married?

CHURCH, IF CELIBACY SEEMS IMPOSSIBLE, MARRIAGE IS NOT THE IMMEDIATE ANSWER

Your Faith in Jesus is

Your Walk with the Lord is

Finding your identity in Christ is

These three things will better prepare you for marriage

You know what is the greatest asset you can have in your singleness?

Knowing who you are in Christ

Knowing how Loved you are by God himself

Knowing that nothing can compare to the Love God has shown you.

PAUL THEN TURNS THE FOCUS OF THE CONVERSATION TO THOSE WHO ARE MARRIED:

1 Corinthians 7:2–4 NKJV

2 Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. 3 Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. 4 The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.

1 Cor 7:2-4

1 Corinthians 7:2 NKJV

2 Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband.

IT IS/WAS REALLY HARD TO BE SURROUNDED BY SUCH AN SEXUALLY BROKEN CULTURE

IT IS/WAS REALLY HARD TO BE SURROUNDED BY SUCH AN SEXUALLY BROKEN CULTURE

IT IS HARD TO BE IN A CITY LIKE CORINTH AND STAY SEXUALLY PURE

SO WHAT IS THE SOLUTION FOR THE CHRISTIAN SPOUSE IN CORINTH?

IF YOU

PAUL GOES ON TO

For those of you who are married, because of your culture

Do

Because of the Temple Prostitutes

Because of the Sexual Immorality that is running it’s course within the Church

Paul fights against

Let each man have his own wife

Let each man have his own wife

Let each wife have her own husband

AKA Let them be intimate.

Let the Marriage bed be there source of intimacy.

Let the Husband render to his wife the affection due to her

Let the wife also, render to her husband the affection due to him

One of the joys of marriage is the discovery of one another’s pleasures

I believe, there is more adventure in companionship than in the conquest.

There is more adventure in finding what makes your spouse feel loved, than actually finding your spouse.

And no, I’m not just talking about intimacy with one another

It’s important, but there is more to life than just sex.

I’m talking about every area of the marriage

One of the things I learned early on, is that sexual health is important, but its not the most important thing

There is beauty in every part of marriage

There is beauty in knowing that you belong to one another

There is beauty in ownership of one another

Paul isn’t speaking of abusive authority

However, it is mutual

Most of the time, when we think of submission, the first thought that comes to mind has a feminine undertone.

However, it is mutual

Paul isn’t speaking to seeing your spouse like property

In a marriage, our authority is over one another

No one, and I mean no one should take the place of your spouse.

Paul isn’t speaking of abusive authority

He is speaking to the belonging of one to another.

Like, you ever look at your spouse and praise God for giving them to you

For gifting you with such a beautiful partner.

Besides God, Your spouse should be the first person you speak to regarding anything urgent

BTW, this was foreign to the Jewish and Greecian Culture.

For the Jew

It was a Paradigm shift from Women are Property to “Your wife owns you”

For the Greek

It was a Paradigm Shift from “Have Sex with whomever you want” to “Your Spouse is Yours and Yours alone”

Therefore

It shouldn’t be your BFF

CAN SOMEONE SAY THEREFORE?

If shouldn’t be your parents

1 Corinthians 7:5 NKJV

5 Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

:5

It’s not your co-worker

BECAUSE OF WHAT GOD HAS JOINED TOGETHER

BECAUSE OF WHAT GOD HAS GIFTED YOU WITH

DO. NOT. DEPRIVE. ONE. ANOTHER. FROM COMING TOGETHER.

In fact, the only time that you should deprive yourself when it comes to sexual intimacy, is to give yourself to prayer and fasting.

To seek the Father

But even after that, Paul says,

Once you’ve prayed and fasted, come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self control.

CHURCH WHAT DOES THIS TELL US?

ONE OF TWO THINGS:

EITHER SATAN KNOWS OUR WEAKNESSES AND VULNERABILITY

OR WE NEVER DEALT WITH OUR WEAKNESSES AND NOW THIS HAS BECOME A CONCESSION INSTEAD OF THE STANDARD.

WHAT DO I MEAN?

We all know that Satan is a scoundrel

We all know that he is the Father of Lies

He has come to steal, kill, and to destroy

And some times we don’t D-Up on him

We let him run game on us

Or, we set ourselves up for failure

What do I mean?

We never confronted our issues

We never invested in our purity

We didn’t even try to live holy lives

And now that your wife is not in the mood, you are quick to go get your fix on your device or by seeking attention somewhere else.

This tells us a lot about ourselves

It is just like Moses and the topic of Divorce

Divorce was never the Standard it was the Concession

Because the people’s hearts were hard, an exception had to be made, but it wasn’t God’s original plan

When it comes to this, the plan isn’t to just have sex because of self control

But to enjoy sex as the fruit of self control.

Enjoy sex as a gift

Not as a mandatory thing

Many

Our hearts are still hard, and we don’t plan on doing anything about it.

FRIENDS IT IS GOING BE REALLY HARD TO FLOURISH IN OUR MARRIAGES WHEN WE LOVE WITHOUT REALLY LOVING

DO NOT DEPRIVE ONE ANOTHER

Church, I love that Paul exposes our tendencies

Church, I love that Paul exposes our tendencies

WHEN WE ARE INTIMATE BUT NOT REALLY

Men, it’s real isn’t it

We are tempted the most by Satan when we are most vulnerable.

FOR THE CORINTHIANS, THEIR WHOLE CULTURE WAS BUILT AROUND SATISFYING NEEDS

WHEN WE DO THINGS FORCEFULLY

WE EXPECT OUR SPOUSES TO PARTICIPATE IN THIS INTIMATE ACT WHEN THEY AREN’T FEELING IT.

SATISFYING THEIR SEXUAL HUNGER WAS FACILITATED BY THE TEMPLE PROSTITUTES

REMEMBER THE SELF CONTROL YOU INVESTED IN DURING YOUR SINGLENESS?

REMEMBER WHEN YOU PRESSED INTO THE WORK OF THE HOLY SPIRIT IN YOUR LIFE?

REMEMBER WHEN YOU CHOSE NOT TO BE UNEQUALLY YOKED BECAUSE YOU KNEW IT WOULD COMPROMISE YOUR TESTIMONY?

REMEMBER HOW GOOD IT FELT TO INVEST IN YOUR PURITY?

So what could they do?

What can we do?

What can we do when you aren’t seeing eye to eye with your spouse?

When you know you messed up

WHEN WE TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ONE ANOTHER

When you might as well set up shop on the couch

Ephesians 4:26 NKJV

26 “Be angry, and do not sin”: do not let the sun go down on your wrath,

Men, I am going to encourage you with some scripture.

Romans 12:18 NKJV

18 If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.

Philippians 2:3 NKJV

3 Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.

Romans 12:2 NKJV

2 And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.

As much as it’s in your control, be at peace with your wife.

ASK YOURSELF, WHY ISN’T YOUR WIFE IN THE MOOD?

As much as the ba

DON’T CONSIDER WHAT YOU CAN’T CONTROL.

THINK ABOUT THE THINGS THAT ARE YOUR FAULT.

NOW, IF YOU ARE LIKE ME, ASK YOURSELF

Honey do list is done

Dishes are done

My socks are magically in the hamper, and not in the general vascinity

You just killed it.

Might as well be honored as the Best Husband in the World.

And still nothing.

Then my brother, it’s time to press into the Holy Spirit and ask for more of His Fruit.

More self control.

More love for your wife

More joy in the day