God with us in the mess

Lots of things about life can be messy. Our schedules can be messy, our finances can be messy, our family life can be messy. Our kids can be messy. Our mess can be messy.

Can we all agree that life can be messy?

I know that my life can be messy from time to time. I cleaned my desk off a week or so ago. Someone had remarked that a messy desk is a sign of intelligence. I must have been really smart at the time I started cleaning it. As I was writing my message for today, I had empty egg cartons on my desk because who doesn’t need empty egg cartons on their desk. I had a roll of paper towels because you never know when you are going to make a mess.

Desks can get messy and life can get really messy.

Life got extremely messy for Mary and Joseph.

The Bible doesn’t tell us how Joseph found out about Mary’s pregnancy. We don’t know if the news was shared by a tear-filled, anxiety-ridden Mary. We don’t know if it was a friend who heard from a friend who heard from Elizabeth. Or it could have been that, after returning from her visit with Elizabeth, she was no longer able to hide the signs of growing life.

This picture is how most people think about Joseph’s reaction when he found out Mary was pregnant. It is a nice picture, they are both smiling. Joseph is happy to hear the news that the woman that he is betrothed to is pregnant and he is not the father. What a joyous occasion for him! Not!

This is probably a better picture of the look that crossed Joseph’s face when he heard the news! We don’t think much of Joseph at Christmas, our focus is on Jesus and then Mary. But think for a moment about the emotions that Joseph went through when he heard this news.

However he found out, it had to feel like a blow. Betrothal wasn’t like a modern-day engagement, where all you need to do is return a ring and cancel your wedding plans. Betrothal was more contractual than our marriages are today. Betrothal involved a contract with a payment from the groom as the price for the bride. If either the bride or groom died during this betrothal period the living partner would be referred to as a widow or widower. The betrothal could only be broken by legal action. It required a certificate of divorce. Their commitment was deep. It was only at the end of the betrothal period that the wedding ceremony was held and then the couple would begin living together as husband and wife.

But then everything changed.

Mary could explain as many times as she wanted that this child wasn’t another man’s, but who would believe that? Joseph may have been a righteous man, but he wasn’t delusional. He knew how babies were made, and even in the stories he heard growing up of God intervening to grant children to the prophets of old, they still involved a man and a woman. She had obviously had an affair—or maybe she had been raped. The whole spectrum of emotions and explanations probably swirled into his mind.

It was bad enough that she tells him that she is pregnant, but she goes on to explain that God is the father of the baby. That had to have been to much for Joseph to even begin to grasp. I know a young lady who has a 3 year old daughter that is in foster care. She has been deemed unfit to raise her child. The state has been trying to determine who the father is. The girl has no idea who of the many men that she has been with is the father of this little girl. We scratch our heads at that and wonder how she could not know.

Joseph could have gotten angry.

He could have her brought to trial to decide if she was a victim, a participant in prostitution, or had had an affair.

He could have her brought out of her home, where she most likely lived with her parents, to be stoned in front of the entire community. These actions would have been within his rights, and nobody would’ve blamed him. That was what people did in those days for such crimes against the law of God.

This is not Luke’s birth narrative. There are no angels singing in the sky to peaceful shepherds in a field. No halos sitting over Mary’s head. This is not the sanitized nativity scene we see all over this time of year. This is messy, chaotic, awkward, and hard.

This is real life, and it involves difficult decisions, destroyed reputations, rumors, and hardship. Jesus did not come into a sanitized nativity scene. Rather, Jesus came into this very messy, chaotic, awkward, hard world—through ordinary people called to extraordinary things.

What can we learn from the birth of the King?

It is really important that that we remember that Joseph was a righteous man.

Matthew: A Bible Commentary in the Wesleyan Tradition 2. The Birth of Jesus 1:18–25

The most natural meaning of this term is that he was a law-abiding person. Even a private divorce would have required two witnesses. His conflict was with how much public disgrace he would force Mary to suffer. It is likely that Matthew’s use of the word righteous to describe Joseph also reflected this concern for Mary’s well-being.

Imagine being Joseph. It doesn’t matter what Mary says—it would still be difficult to believe. You would go through all your options, but most of us wouldn’t land where Joseph did.

It would be easy for him to cry out for justice.

We know that people have killed others for far less.

The feelings of betrayal would be hard to see through.

This marriage was not necessarily a marriage of love. It most likely was contractual between Mary’s family and Joseph.

He would have promised an amount of money for her—which he wouldn’t have to pay if he could prove she had been raped or unfaithful.

His reputation could also be saved and his side of the contract upheld if he took her to trial and found out about some sort of infidelity on her part.

Despite this being a contractual relationship and an unbelievable situation, he chooses the path least damaging—not to himself but to Mary: divorce.

The Bible says there in verse 19:

Common English Bible Chapter 1

Because he didn’t want to humiliate her, he decided to call off their engagement quietly.

A quiet divorce would not necessarily prevent rumors. There’s a chance people would always believe they had broken a vow to not sleep together until the marriage was complete.

A quiet divorce would, however, possibly give Mary a chance at just returning to her parents’ home. While she would still have a difficult life ahead, she would be alive, versus a stoning or a lengthy, public, shameful that could still end in death for her.

Joseph’s act of mercy shows us that, though he is a man committed to Jewish law, he is also a person of mercy.

He clearly has love for Mary. Whether his feelings toward her are romantic isn’t clear, but what is clear is that he cares enough about her to seek mercy.

“Righteous” is often described as doing the right things for the right reasons, and this defines Joseph. Despite the pain, he wanted to do what was right for those involved.

Would you do that? Would you take the path of grace and mercy if the person you loved failed you in such a major way?

The second thing that we can learn is that in the midst of the mess, an angel of God shows up.

The Bible says that an angel comes to Joseph in a dream. This dream happened after he had made up his mind that he was going to divorce Mary. This dream came after the decision had been made in his mind.

This couldn’t have been an easy decision, and the decision he made illustrated his righteousness.

Have you ever had to make a really hard decision? They do not happen easily. Sometimes when you go to bed you wrestle with that decision throughout the night. Joseph had already wrestled with the decision and had gone to bed determined that he was going to file for a private divorce from Mary.

But, then God shows up. In this case, God sent and angel who tells him:

Common English Bible Chapter 1

Joseph son of David, don’t be afraid to take Mary as your wife, because the child she carries was conceived by the Holy Spirit. 21 She will give birth to a son, and you will call him Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.

Joseph wakes up and doesn’t hesitate to do what was asked of him. No hesitation, but rather radical obedience.

This was not a small thing to follow through with, even after the dream. Joseph knew what this would mean.

There would be rumors. The righteous Mary and Joseph would be viewed as less than righteous by certain people.

Reputations would change.

Joseph would claim this child—who is not his—as his own.

You know what it would be like. Many of you grew up in the era of when a young woman got pregnant and was not married that she disappeared until after the baby was born. Sometimes the girl’s parents would take the baby and raise it as their own. Sometimes the baby would have been given up for adoption.

There would be rumors and talk. I remember from high school the year I was in 11th grade. My brother was a senior that year. There were six girls in his graduating class that where pregnant when graduation time came. That is six out of a class of about 30 students.

There was lots of rumors and gossip going around the school and our community about those girls.

While Joseph knew some of the immediate consequences of claiming this child as his, he had no idea what would await him.

Having any child is a life-changing experience, but how do you prepare for the son of God?

There is not a book on what to expect when you’re expecting the son of God.

Joseph’s commitment to the call of God to parent this child was an adventure into unknown places.

Yet he also would have grown up with the Hebrew scriptures, what the prophets had said, and he would have known this road would not be easy. The prophet Isaiah wrote:

Isaiah 7:14 CEB

14 Therefore, the Lord will give you a sign. The young woman is pregnant and is about to give birth to a son, and she will name him Immanuel.

Joseph would have heard that verse many times. Little did he realize that the young woman is none other than Mary.

The call of God on his life was stronger than Joseph’s desire to flee.

Even after the angel appeared, he could have left, yet he didn’t.

Joseph desired to follow God, even if that meant running right into the mess.

All of his previous plans for his life with Mary have suddenly changed, yet he still chooses to follow.

The third thing we learn is that in the midst of the mess, God shows up.

Joseph is told to name the child Jesus, which means “Yahweh saves.”

The name “Jesus” fulfills the promise that God has heard the cries of his people.

Jesus will save the people from their sins.

The naming of a child in their culture illustrates Joseph claiming Jesus as his own child.

Claiming a child as your own—regardless of parentage—was just as binding as if they were your biological child.

Matthew: A Bible Commentary in the Wesleyan Tradition 2. The Birth of Jesus 1:18–25

In Joseph’s culture, naming the child would be an act of acknowledging the child to be his p 56 own. This would provide the child a lineage and a place of honor in the society. For Joseph to obey the command to name the child would be somewhat equivalent to adopting Him.

This was an adoption without distinction. From that point forward, he was Joseph’s child.

There is another name for Jesus given in this text: “Immanuel.”

“God with us.”

The Apostle John wrote:

Revelation 21:3–5 The Message

3 I heard a voice thunder from the Throne: “Look! Look! God has moved into the neighborhood, making his home with men and women! They’re his people, he’s their God. 4 He’ll wipe every tear from their eyes. Death is gone for good—tears gone, crying gone, pain gone—all the first order of things gone.” 5 The Enthroned continued, “Look! I’m making everything new. Write it all down—each word dependable and accurate.”

God has moved into the neighborhood. He is no longer just out there someplace, but he has come to us to abide with us, to live in us by the power of the Holy Spirit.

God is entering the world, to be present with humanity in the mess.

This was a difficult period of history for the Jews. They were not living in freedom, the Romans were in power and they oppressed the Jews.

The Jews were taxed astronomically. Taxation was the entire reason that Joseph and Mary travelled to Bethlehem. Sure it was about a census, but the census was used to determine how much to tax the people.

The money collected from the taxes was used to support the expansion of the Roman empire.

Soldiers walked the streets, doing what they wanted.

Jews couldn’t build or travel without permission from the government.

Not only was it difficult politically; it was generally a hard time to live.

One of the most common causes of death for women was childbirth.

Simple injuries could cause infection and death.

Poverty was rampant.

Survival was dependent on back-breaking work.

Jesus comes into this difficult and messy world. God comes into the mess.

The fourth thing that we learn is that the world is still a messy place.

Look at our world today, most of us live comfortably, but not all do.

We might never go to bed hungry, but even here in America, here in Pennsylvania, here in Somerset county, children go to bed hungry.

Drugs are still a source of addiction. I did a search on the phrase “drug bust johnstown pa 2019” and got almost one million hits of news articles that wrote about people who were arrested because of drugs.

The immigration crisis seems to keep worsening. Yes, the numbers of people crossing our southern border has decreased, but people are still leaving their countries by the thousands looking for a better life.

There is war.

There is poverty.

We know that even in our own lives things are messy.

There are diagnoses no one wanted.

Death still happens, and sometimes at the worst times.

We are busy, and life is hard.

There is so much in our world that is hard.

But here is the great news

God is still God-with-us in the midst of the mess.

God is with us, that is the news that the angel announced.

Luke 2:10–12 CEB

10 The angel said, “Don’t be afraid! Look! I bring good news to you—wonderful, joyous news for all people. 11 Your savior is born today in David’s city. He is Christ the Lord. 12 This is a sign for you: you will find a newborn baby wrapped snugly and lying in a manger.”

Advent is about our anticipation of Christ’s birth and his return, but it also is a time for us to look for where God is at work now in our world.

We sometimes can’t see the work of God in our world because we are so focused on the bad, but God is still God-with-us:

In beautiful moments.

When people share.

When people choose the hard work of peace over conflict.

We cannot go through life as Christians like Eyore who said “Don’t worry about me. Go and enjoy yourself. I’ll stay here and be miserable.”

That is not the life for us. God is with us, He is here at work in our messy world and we need to be looking for where he is at work.

One of the ways God wants to be present in the world is through us.

Just like God used Joseph, God wants to use us.

We won’t be the actual parents of the Son of God, but we are able to follow the call of Christ despite what that means.

We can focus on mercy over the law.

We can focus on love and obedience over what that means for our reputation.

We can embrace the mess of our lives and still trust that God wants to use us.

Conclusion

Joseph was just an ordinary man trying to follow God to the best of his ability, and it led him on a wild and messy adventure of raising the Messiah. But the God who called Joseph on this wild adventure is still in the business of calling us to wild and messy adventures that reveal God-with-us in the world.

This is a great time for us to look for where God is at work and to ask what God is calling us to do in the midst of it all.

You probably won’t get an angel dream, but you might get a dream in your heart that just won’t go away. It might be a hard dream: a dream that asks you to forgive, or to give up propriety for the sake of love, or to do other hard things. It won’t be easy, as I’m sure it wasn’t easy for Joseph, but you’ll also get to be a part of this great story of the work that God is continuing to do in the world, and you’ll get to remind people that God is with us, even in the mess.

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