Eulogy for Ruth Martha Chiren

When Melodie asked me to offer the Eulogy for baby Ruth Martha Chiren I was immediately honored and humbled. I had both emotions at the same time, honored because to speak on such an occasion as this is serious and points to the gravity of the circumstance and this family has entrusted me for the privilege of sharing in their most intimate and hollowed moment. Humbled because of the heavy theme to which I must approach with delicacy and deep empathy.

To Ewing and Melodie and your entire family, I hope that my words will bring comfort to your souls on this difficult day and that you will find strength, courage and peace as you struggle to find the answers you seek due to one of the most significant losses a family could ever have; the loss of a child.

Eulogy:

Scripture gives us these words that on most occasions would give a family reason to celebrate, but in these circumstances it may seem cruel. However, I think this scripture can still give us cause to pause and consider the goodness of God, the Creator of the universe and the very reason for our existence. Listen to these words, from , “Children are a gift from the LORD; they are a reward from him.”

As you hear these words it is important to recognize that God loves us with a love that we cannot fully comprehend with our finite minds and to consider this verse challenges our very thoughts of His love. I wish to encourage you and to remind you that it is God who takes care of even the simplest of creatures and how much more does He care for you and I? God called Adam and Eve to be fruitful and multiply; He was blessing the creation process that He placed within humanity which continues even now.

In Mark Chapter 10:13-16, Jesus made it a point to place His very own blessing on the children. Listen to these words, “13 One day some parents brought their children to Jesus so he could touch and bless them. But the disciples scolded the parents for bothering him. 14 When Jesus saw what was happening, he was angry with his disciples. He said to them, “Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them! For the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like these children. 15 I tell you the truth, anyone who doesn’t receive the Kingdom of God like a child will never enter it.” 16 Then he took the children in his arms and placed his hands on their heads and blessed them.”

14 When Jesus saw what was happening, he was angry with his disciples. He said to them, “Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them! For the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like these children. 15 I tell you the truth, anyone who doesn’t receive the Kingdom of God like a child will never enter it.” 16 Then he took the children in his arms and placed his hands on their heads and blessed them.

Tyndale House Publishers, Holy Bible: New Living Translation (Carol Stream, IL: Tyndale House Publishers, 2015), .

Jesus Himself wanted it known that children are a gift from the LORD and that we all could stand to be reminded that we as adults must have childlike faith even to enter heaven, which by the way, is where little baby Ruth Martha is at this very moment! Paul reminds us in , “8 Yes, we are fully confident, and we would rather be away from these earthly bodies, for then we will be at home with the Lord.”

Tyndale House Publishers, Holy Bible: New Living Translation (Carol Stream, IL: Tyndale House Publishers, 2015), .

When we leave these bodies we are immediately found in the presence of the LORD Himself. This is an encouraging thought for us as Christians, this is what gives us hope that there is life after death and currently baby Ruth Martha is with Jesus now and His blessing upon her is something we can only imagine! He is blessing her in the life which is to come and for Ewing, Melodie, and all the family who have this same hope will one day see baby Ruth Martha again. There will be a family reunion one day and in this we can find solace and hope for there is a future for you all and for baby Ruth Martha.

These are encouraging thoughts to our spirits and our hearts, but even though these words bring some encouragement we still are here in this moment feeling the hurt, the pain and the grief of a loss that cannot be explained. As a minister of the Gospel of Jesus Christ even for me this is a most difficult eulogy to provide because it is difficult to understand the why? To you all, I tell you the truth, I really don’t have that answer for you, not today and maybe never. My wife and I have lost three of our own to miscarriage and I still have no words to explain why.

It is truly difficult because I have theology that believes that all things that we go through on this earth has purpose and meaning, but how do I justify this tragedy to a group who are hurting and struggling in this moment? Maybe even some of you are angry. Maybe you are angry with God Himself, after all, how can a good God cause such grief and pain if children are really a blessing from Him? How can He decide to take this baby from her parents?

I don’t have the answers as to why this has happened, however, I do believe that God in His infinite wisdom knows everything even beforehand and that Scripture says that He is a good God that provides mercy and grace to our lives daily. I can’t explain the thoughts of God as to why He has allowed this loss, but I can remind our hearts and minds that He is a God that will never leave us or forsake us even in our most bitter moments. And if you think you need to let God know of your disappointment in Him, the good news is He is a God that is big enough to take your hurts and criticisms. Jesus knows what it means to hurt and be broken in life and He surely can handle your brokenness even now.

I am here to encourage each of you to grieve, to hurt, to cry and to release all the anguish you may be carrying today. Take the time that you each need to work through this loss and remember that the stages of grief will come no matter how hard you try to keep it down. One of the great mercies and graces that God has given us is the ability to grieve and to mourn and ultimately at some point be comforted. To truly love requires that true pain and grief may follow one day. God has designed us to love deeply and when we do love deeply there will come a day where we will grieve deeply as well because of that deep love that we have for others. This is how we live life each and every day with the good days mixed in with some bad days like today.

Conclusion:

I want to put this thought in your mind, however, at this very moment while we are here on earth suffering and feeling the loss that is real and truly painful; little baby Ruth Martha is being held in the arms of Jesus with not one iota of pain or suffering. She is being personally held and blessed by the very Creator of all life and sustainer of all that is good and praiseworthy. She feels no pain whatsoever, and is only experiencing joy in the arms of her Savior. We too will one day experience what she has now but for now I leave you with the Psalm that I often quote to myself in difficult times when I feel alone and hurting.

English Standard Version Psalm 23

The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.

He makes me lie down in green pastures.

He leads me beside still waters.

He restores my soul.

He leads me in paths of righteousness

for his name’s sake.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil,

for you are with me;

your rod and your staff,

they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me

in the presence of my enemies;

you anoint my head with oil;

my cup overflows.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me

all the days of my life,

and I shall dwell in the house of the LORD

forever.

May you find your peace and comfort today in the knowledge that God will be there to love you through your pain and loss. He will be there to hear your hurts, your pains, your anger and He will love you through it all. There is purpose behind our pain and although I cannot fathom how that has meaning in this moment, I can tell you that I can tell you from my own personal experience that God will help you through this tragedy and will ultimately bring healing to your hurting hearts. He did that for me and my wife and He will do that for you as well. God bless you and keep you. Let Us Pray...