Family Matters

Introduction

Good morning and welcome to Dishman Baptist Church. We are so glad that you’re here with us today. Please take your Bibles and turn in them with me to , . We’ll finish up this great chapter this morning. Whether you are here physically or virtually we appreciate you and are thankful that you joined us in worship of our great God together this morning. Know that we count it a privilege and an honor to bring God’s Word to you today.

When you hear the word family - what comes to mind? Maybe for some of you there are fond memories of family growing up. Webster’s Dictionary defines family as the basic unit in society traditionally consisting of two parents rearing their children. Which many of us would agree with - it is the mom and the dad and the 2.5 kids. Of course in my family’s case it’s 4.5 kids. But then listen to how the dictionary continues the definition: also : any of various social units differing from but regarded as equivalent to the traditional family. It seems we really don’t know what a family is. We have categories of families - blended families, dysfunctional families, single parent families, grandparent families, nuclear families.

Maybe for some of you the image of family evokes anything but fond memories. For some of you the idea of family evokes a visceral reaction possibly of anger or even hatred. And for that I am profoundly sorry. Why is there these disparate reactions within each of us with regards to family. The most fundamental answer of that question is the presence of sin in each of us that corrupts all of our relationships. But another aspect is, with the exception of the singularly intimate relationship between a husband and a wife, there is no other relationship that holds greater capacity for joy but also greater capacity for pain than those found within the family unit.

We’re going to learn a lot about the family today through the picture that Mark gives us of Jesus immediate family - we’re going to learn what the family is and what the family is meant to be. With all that in mind let’s take a look at .

Mark 3:31–35 CSB

His mother and his brothers came, and standing outside, they sent word to him and called him. A crowd was sitting around him and told him, “Look, your mother, your brothers, and your sisters are outside asking for you.” He replied to them, “Who are my mother and my brothers?” Looking at those sitting in a circle around him, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers! Whoever does the will of God is my brother and sister and mother.”

Kyle did a great job last week of setting the table for us today. Now he and the youth are off at winter camp and I’ve heard that some good things are happening there. We’re going to continue to look at the back end of this book end passage. Mark starts the passage off with the mother and brothers of Jesus seeking Him and he returns to this condition following the interlude with the Pharisees. Some commentators say that this is because Mark was allowing the family of Jesus time to travel from Nazareth to Capernaum. This could be the case or they could have been following Jesus around - either way Mark is now ready to tell us what happens when the family of Jesus finally gets to Him.

Should Have Known Better

Mark started off this section saying that Jesus family had come seeking Him because they thought He was out of His mind. The betrayal of family cuts deep.

Mark 3:20–21 CSB

Jesus entered a house, and the crowd gathered again so that they were not even able to eat. When his family heard this, they set out to restrain him, because they said, “He’s out of his mind.”

There are some who try to say that these aren’t really Jesus brothers - that they were cousins or close family relatives. This is mainly in an attempt to establish the ideal that Mary remained a virgin her entire life and is therefore worthy of veneration or worship because she is the perpetual virgin mother of our Lord. But the Psalms prophesied that Jesus would have actual, physical brothers. says

There are some who try to say that these aren’t really Jesus brothers - that they were cousins or close family relatives. This is mainly in an attempt to establish the ideal that Mary remained a virgin her entire life and is therefore worthy of veneration or worship because she is the perpetual virgin mother of our Lord. But the Psalms prophesied that Jesus would have actual, physical brothers. says

Psalm 69:8–9 CSB

I have become a stranger to my brothers and a foreigner to my mother’s sons because zeal for your house has consumed me, and the insults of those who insult you have fallen on me.

And Matthew tells us that Joseph waits until after the birth of Jesus to consummate his marriage to Mary. The Bible also attests to the fact that Jesus had real literal brothers. Later in the Gospel of Mark we’ll read

Mark 6:3 CSB

Isn’t this the carpenter, the son of Mary, and the brother of James, Joses, Judas, and Simon? And aren’t his sisters here with us?” So they were offended by him.

Mark The authors of James and Jude were the brothers of Jesus. James was one of the pillars of the early church in Acts and presided over the Jerusalem council that is recounted in . But they did not always start out that way. Early in Jesus ministry they refused to believe in Him, almost even mocking Him.

The authors of James and Jude were the brothers of Jesus. James was one of the pillars of the early church in Acts and presided over the Jerusalem council that is recounted in . But they did not always start out that way. Early in Jesus ministry they refused to believe in Him, almost even mocking Him.

John 7:3–5 CSB

So his brothers said to him, “Leave here and go to Judea so your disciples can see your works that you are doing. For no one does anything in secret while he’s seeking public recognition. If you do these things, show yourself to the world.” (For not even his brothers believed in him.)

But here they show up with Mary and seek to take Him home. There have been many questions and speculations as to why Joseph is not named. I think it is very likely that he died somewhere between the story of the families travel to Jerusalem told in and when Jesus became an adult and started His ministry. The absence of Joseph would also lend another reason to why the family would have come to seek Jesus. We were actually given a clue in the passage from that we read

Mark 6:3 CSB

Isn’t this the carpenter, the son of Mary, and the brother of James, Joses, Judas, and Simon? And aren’t his sisters here with us?” So they were offended by him.

Notice here that they say “Isn’t this the carpenter” not, as Matthew renders this saying in “Isn’t this the carpenter’s son”. Jesus would have grown up with Joseph learning a trade and now it seems very likely that He would have had a reputation in the region for being a very capable carpenter. Early church tradition suggests that Jesus and Joseph had been plow and yoke makers, supplying the farmers around Nazareth with implements for growing crops.

As the oldest male in the family it would have fallen to Him to return, care and provide for His family. Yet here is Jesus galavanting across the countryside, preaching in Synagogues and very likely ruining the families reputation and business prospects back in Nazareth. It was a well known fact that He had come out of Nazareth and as His popularity ebbed and flowed and the religious leaders turned against Him, they could also have strangled the family business back in Nazareth making it hard for His family to make a living.

And so here are his brothers standing outside the home and calling Him out. This is quite the picture of faith even here. His brothers, who are seeking Jesus not because He is the Messiah but because He is their human brother who is responsible for providing for the family, are outside the home and His disciples, who are learning to seek Him for the spiritual benefits that He will impart to them, are on the inside. His family is unwilling to get close to Him because of the social stigma associated with Him by this time. The Pharisees and scribes were conspiring how to kill Him and had just tried to discredit Him by associating His ministry with demons.

It’s not hard to understand why His brothers would be there seeking Him. But surely not Mary. She would have known better. After all she’d been the one the angel appeared to as told by Luke in Luke 1:31-33

Luke 1:31–33 CSB

Now listen: You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you will name him Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High, and the Lord God will give him the throne of his father David. He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and his kingdom will have no end.”

Christian Standard Bible Chapter 1

31 Now listen: You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you will name him Jesus. 32 He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High, and the Lord God will give him the throne of his father David. 33 He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and his kingdom will have no end.”

Luke 1:

She was there in the stable and heard the shepherds. She had been there when the wise men arrived and told of the star. She and Joseph had no doubt shared stories of their angelic visits. If there was anyone on earth who knew who Jesus was and would support His ministry it would be His mother.

John 7:3–5 CSB

So his brothers said to him, “Leave here and go to Judea so your disciples can see your works that you are doing. For no one does anything in secret while he’s seeking public recognition. If you do these things, show yourself to the world.” (For not even his brothers believed in him.)

John 7:3-5

And yet here she was. Outside the house with His brothers calling for Him and planning to take Him home. Oh Mary, the one who had sung

Luke 1:46–50 CSB

And Mary said: My soul praises the greatness of the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, because he has looked with favor on the humble condition of his servant. Surely, from now on all generations will call me blessed, because the Mighty One has done great things for me, and his name is holy. His mercy is from generation to generation on those who fear him.

Luke 1:46-

And yet she, just like John the Baptist later in Jesus ministry, would allow the daily concerns of life to crowd her vision and she would lose sight of who her Son was. She would seek to save Him from the dangers that were posed by the Pharisees, the Herodians and the Roman government. But she would also seek Him as the provider of the family who would look out for her in her older years.

She knew the plans that God had made known to her regarding her Son and yet she would seek to impose her own plans on God’s and subvert the very reason for Christ’s coming. Maybe she had never gotten out of her head the prophecy of Simeon at Christ’s circumcision

Luke 2:34–35 CSB

Then Simeon blessed them and told his mother Mary: “Indeed, this child is destined to cause the fall and rise of many in Israel and to be a sign that will be opposed— and a sword will pierce your own soul—that the thoughts of many hearts may be revealed.”

Luke 2:34-35

So in spite of knowing the promises of God here she was seeking to bring her Son home.

And you know - we do the exact same thing. Please don’t hear me being too hard on Mary or disparaging her character at all. She was only human and had human desires, needs and wants. She wanted security. She wanted safety for her family. So she lost sight of God’s plans in light of her own. How often do we, despite the fact that we read and profess and claim all the promises of this book, try to subvert or to advance or to hurry God’s plans for our lives, for His church, for the salvation of others because we want it in our own timeline or according to our own plans.

So what would you do if your family came seeking you thinking you were making a mistake, that you were out of your mind to be following this Jesus religion. That your faith was out of step with societal norms and therefore hurting the family reputation. What if they came seeking you to bring you home?

The Type and Shadow

It is the crowd that alerts Jesus to the presence of His family. They were outside the door calling for Him and the word gets passed through the crowd “Look your mother, your brothers and your sisters are outside asking for you.” No doubt they expected Him to get up and go see what His family needed. But instead He offers an intriguing question.

“Who are my mother and my brothers?” It would seem on the surface that Jesus is saying that the physical family is no longer important and so the ties to His family were no longer important. But if we were to assume that we would be mistaken. Jesus is setting the crowd up for what He really wants to drive home to them. He is about to elevate the importance of the family as a type and shadow for what the true family is.

Note first though that elsewhere in Scripture Jesus chides the religious leaders for their neglect of family responsibilities and also provides for His own family.

First the religious leaders. Later in Mark, we will study this more in depth when we get there later this year, Jesus will chide the religious leaders saying

Mark 7:11 CSB

But you say, ‘If anyone tells his father or mother: Whatever benefit you might have received from me is corban’ ” (that is, an offering devoted to God),

Mark 7:11–14 CSB

But you say, ‘If anyone tells his father or mother: Whatever benefit you might have received from me is corban’ ” (that is, an offering devoted to God), “you no longer let him do anything for his father or mother. You nullify the word of God by your tradition that you have handed down. And you do many other similar things.” Summoning the crowd again, he told them, “Listen to me, all of you, and understand:

Mark 7:11–13 CSB

But you say, ‘If anyone tells his father or mother: Whatever benefit you might have received from me is corban’ ” (that is, an offering devoted to God), “you no longer let him do anything for his father or mother. You nullify the word of God by your tradition that you have handed down. And you do many other similar things.”

And then later as He would hang on the cross, Jesus takes the time to do exactly what Mary had sought Him to do here. says

John 19:25–27 CSB

Standing by the cross of Jesus were his mother, his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple he loved standing there, he said to his mother, “Woman, here is your son.” Then he said to the disciple, “Here is your mother.” And from that hour the disciple took her into his home.

John 19:

But Jesus would never repudiate the importance of the physical family as it was the building block, and still is the building block, of His church. It had always been meant to play a central role in the plan of salvation and sanctification. That is why we see the fabric of the family degraded so quickly following the Fall and continue to see it unravel through out the Old Testament narratives. The entire Old Testament is a family counselor’s nightmare if they were to have to counsel the families directly involved but it is also an incredible resource to provide healing to families today.

Immediately after the Fall we see the formation of the first family as Adam and Eve conceive and bear two children - but one becomes jealous of the other and kills his brother. Noah’s son Ham turns out to be quite the rogue. Ishmael is banished so that Isaac can have the inheritance of Abraham. Isaac then has Jacob and Esau and the dysfunctional relationship they had. Jacob has twelve sons and one is sold into slavery by his own brothers. Later in the Old Testament David’s family is marred by rape, murder and subversion of David’s authority as his son seeks to claim the throne out from under him. And that is just a few examples. The Old Testament is the story of Israel’s failure to live out the intentions of God for them as a nation and it is most deeply demonstrated in their failure to uphold the most basic of commands given to them in

Deuteronomy 6:7–10 CSB

Repeat them to your children. Talk about them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Bind them as a sign on your hand and let them be a symbol on your forehead. Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your city gates. “When the Lord your God brings you into the land he swore to your fathers Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob that he would give you—a land with large and beautiful cities that you did not build,

Deuteronomy 6:6–10 CSB

These words that I am giving you today are to be in your heart. Repeat them to your children. Talk about them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Bind them as a sign on your hand and let them be a symbol on your forehead. Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your city gates. “When the Lord your God brings you into the land he swore to your fathers Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob that he would give you—a land with large and beautiful cities that you did not build,

Deuteronomy 6:6–9 CSB

These words that I am giving you today are to be in your heart. Repeat them to your children. Talk about them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Bind them as a sign on your hand and let them be a symbol on your forehead. Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your city gates.

Pass them on within your family. The family was to be the basic teaching place and the fundamental building block of the nation and later, as I’ve already said, the church. And the attacks against the family just keep coming.

And it has been this way for decades. During his time of ministry Martyn Lloyd-Jones commented on this “Whether we like it or not, a breakdown in home-life will eventually lead to a breakdown everywhere. This is, surely, the most menacing and dangerous aspect of the state of society at this present time. Once the family idea, the family unit, the family life is broken up—once that goes, soon you will have no other allegiance. It is the most serious thing of all.”

Whether we like it or not, a breakdown in home-life will eventually lead to a breakdown everywhere. This is, surely, the most menacing and dangerous aspect of the state of society at this present time. Once the family idea, the family unit, the family life is broken up—once that goes, soon you will have no other allegiance. It is the most serious thing of all.

Sargent, T. (2007). Gems from Martyn Lloyd-Jones: An Anthology of Quotations from “the Doctor” (p. 117). Milton Keynes, England; Colorado Springs, CO; Hyderabad, AP: Paternoster.

We see challenges to the family and the family unit (one man married to one woman with the potential kids that result) through the combined fronts of the sexual revolution, abortion, divorce among many others societal “norms” that undermine the very sanctity of the family unit. Our schools seek to take away a parent’s right to know anything about what their children are doing or learning. They force vaccinations on us that have been proven to harm children - now before I get in trouble with my wife I should make it clear that I’m only talking about the proposed mandatory HPV vaccine not the Measles, Mumps and Rubella or the other beneficial vaccines that have been given for years.

And yet the family endures - just as traditional marriages endure - because it is a part of the plan of God to demonstrate the truth that Jesus wants most to get to here in this text and to which we will now turn our attention - the idea that spiritual birth ushers us into a spiritual family that does, in some ways, supersede our physical family because it is the true and better family that we were all meant to be a part of. It doesn’t do away with our physical family - what it does is it gives us a picture of how our family is meant to be. You see our physical families will one day cease to be - we will all be a part of the same family of God as we live with Him for eternity. And Jesus clarifies exactly that for us now.

The True and Better

Jesus looks around at the crowd before Him even as the question “Who are my mother and my brothers” hangs there in the air. He clarifies for them - “Here are my mother and my brothers. Whoever does the will of God is my brother and sister and mother.” He is making a statement that elevates our vision from the temporal to the eternal. One commentator writes “The Lord’s point was that the only relationship to Him that matters eternally is not physical but spiritual.” Now don’t overlook the importance of that word eternally. Christ is not saying, I am not saying that our physical families don’t matter - but eternally our spiritual family is without a doubt more important.

And just think - no matter what kind of family you have had here on earth, no matter how messed up or disappointing - you are a part of a family comprised of believers in God that is so much more beautiful. This is a promise through out Scripture. Paul writes in

Ephesians 1:4–6 CSB

For he chose us in him, before the foundation of the world, to be holy and blameless in love before him. He predestined us to be adopted as sons through Jesus Christ for himself, according to the good pleasure of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace that he lavished on us in the Beloved One.

Ephesians 1:

My family just got a great picture of what an adoption can do in the life of one person. For those of you who may be new, my wife and I just completed a 2 1/2 year journey to adopt our little girl Nyah out of the foster system. And in our own imperfect way we are a demonstration of what God does for each of us a He pulls us out of the hell-bound life of sin that we were in, gives us a new home, a new name and a new hope. He gives us the right to be called children as John writes in

John 1:12 CSB

But to all who did receive him, he gave them the right to be children of God, to those who believe in his name,

and then later in his epistle of 1 John he would write

1 John 3:1–2 CSB

See what great love the Father has given us that we should be called God’s children—and we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it didn’t know him. Dear friends, we are God’s children now, and what we will be has not yet been revealed. We know that when he appears, we will be like him because we will see him as he is.

1 John

What a beautiful realization that we can be a part of the family of God. That we can be called brother and sister of Christ. Just rest for a moment in that truth - that if you’ve put your faith in His Son and repented of your sins that you are no longer an enemy or a foreigner or a slave but a son or daughter of God, a member of His very household as Paul tells us in .

There truly is not greater truth than this. As we look around and see the erosion of the family units in our society we mustn’t lose heart. The beautiful truth is that if we do the will of God that we have membership in a more perfect, more true and better family that can never be taken away, will never fall apart and will always share our burdens. This is the picture the church is meant to fulfill - this familial bond, this desire for the good for everyone involved, this love for one another that spurs us on to weep with those who weep and rejoice with those who rejoice. That seeks the best out of and for everyone involved.

But there is a requirement here - that we do the will of God. We must put our faith in Jesus Christ, confess our sins and trust in the salvation that He paid for on the cross on our behalf in order to become a part of this family. If you have never done that. If you’re having a hard time trusting a new family or maybe even your own family because of hurts that have been inflicted on you in the past oh please come and join this family. The hurts will not be magically taken away, but the truth of the love that will shower over you, the joy that God will bring into your life and the healing that can happen when you know that your eternal family is a reality both in the future and the right now.

Maybe you’re here and you’ve heard these truths and you wanted to believe but the concerns of life (interestingly you may hear that phrase again next week) are crowding in and you’ve lost sight of God’s plan. Return to Him, submit to Him, give your desires over to Him and know that He will care for you in a way that only He can.

If you’re already a member of His family then celebrate, be joyful, relish in this familial bond that we share with one another and more importantly that you share with Christ.

Conclusion