Wedding - David and Nicole Brown

INSTRUCTIONS FOR THE SERVICE:

We are going to begin shortly, but I am going to ask each of you to silence or turn off your cell phones

I am also going to ask that you refrain from taking pictures during the ceremony - at the reception, feel free to bombard instagram with your photos, but for the service, we will leave it to the professionals!

Thank you!

PRESENTATION OF THE BRIDE - ***Audience stands

**Who gives this woman to be married?

PRAYER - Matt - DON’T TALK TOO FAST

After prayer, have everyone be seated

Introduction and welcome - DON’T TALK TOO FAST

We are here this evening to witness the union of David Brown and Nicole Cheek in marriage. What we are about to witness this evening together is one of the most mysterious and beautiful moments in the world. The Lord will unite these two together in marriage and He will begin the process of making them become ONE… Two people, two unique and distinct lives, now joined together by the God of all creation into a single, cohesive unit.

This is why all of you have gathered together tonight - friends, family, loved ones. Today is a special day and it is only appropriate that we all gather to celebrate.

On behalf of David and Nicole, I would like to welcome you this evening, and express their gratitude for your attendance. Your presence is the tangible expression of your support and love - which they so desperately need to build a marriage that is centered on the person and work of Jesus Christ.

Message DON’T TALK TOO FAST

It’s an amazing privilege to get to stand here for weddings. I get the pleasure of having the closest seat to what the Lord is doing in the hearts of two people as they are united together in marriage. This is a mysterious and divine moment of the Lord taking two people and beginning the process of making them ONE. What an incredible day - and what an incredible moment that we are witnessing this moment.

Today is Special - but should not ever stay the most important day of your marriage

Yes, today is a special day, but you must remember that it is still just a single day - not too unlike yesterday or tomorrow.

Sure it marks the beginning of your marriage, but today should not remain the most important day of your marriage...

You must understand that each day that you wake up, THAT will be the most important day of your marriage.

The Lord doesn’t want the pinnacle of your marriage to be a day in the past that you look back to.

Marriage was designed by God for a man and a woman to spend each day of their marriage growing closer together - becoming one, and discovering more about the Lord in the process.

Marriage is meant to move forward and not be memorialized in the past, reminiscing about days that once were.

So rejoice in each new day that the Lord gives you, and let that day bring fresh wind into your marriage sails.

DON’T TALK TOO FAST

Your marriage is not primarily about you

Marriage was created by God, FOR God, and unless two people first know and love God, they will never fully grasp the depth of blessing that can be found in marriage.

Without this understanding, marriage will likely be reduced to simply existing for the benefit of each party involved.

This is a significant reduction of what God would desire for marriage.

David and Nicole, you are getting married today not solely for your own satisfaction, but rather for God’s glory to be seen.

Your satisfaction is meant to take a backseat to God’s Glory - and your marriage is not about you - it’s about Him.

If you grab ahold of this idea, and seek to live it out, your satisfaction in your marriage will be infinitely greater than if you set that satisfaction as your highest aim.

It is the famous quote from John Piper - God is most glorified in me, when I am most satisfied in Him.

God’s glory in us needs to be our primary aim, not our own satisfaction. When we do this, we will find that God will bring the satisfaction that we are longing for.

It’s counterintuitive and counter cultural - but it is the only way to experience the fullness of what God created marriage to be.

DON’T TALK TOO FAST

So how do two people step into that type of covenant between themselves and the Lord?

As you step into this covenant of marriage, you should seek to model your marriage on the example that Christ has set for us with the church.

This is a HIGH calling and can only be fully realized with the power of God being present in your marriage.

What might this look like for you two?

In Paul Writes these words:

Philippians 2:3–8 ESV

3 Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. 4 Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. 5 Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, 6 who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, 7 but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. 8 And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.

The concept that Paul writes about here, I believe, is the key to marital success.

1. Be outwardly focused.

Paul tells to “do nothing from selfish ambition - but in humility, count others more significant than ourselves.” David, your mantra needs to be “she before me.” Nicole, yours is “he before me.”

The Lord has established a particular paradigm in marriage where we are to look out for the interests of our spouse...

What that means is that your responsibility is to identify the needs of the other and meet them to the best of your ability.

When a husband and wife live life like this - everyone’s needs get met without one or both striving to meet their own needs.

Become an expert at identifying one another’s needs and meet those needs as fully as you humanly can.

2. Be marked by humility

Paul also tells us in this passage that Jesus did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but that he humbled Himself.

The first thing that we need to understand here is that Jesus is and was completely equal to God...

He was not and is not lesser than any of the expressions of the God-head.

This is a picture for how you two are to live your lives.

Arrogance and pride is one of the most toxic poisons to a marriage.

You are co-equals in this marriage.

When one of you submits to the other, or humbles yourself before the other, it is in no way communicating that you are lesser than the other.

It’s communicating your deep love for the Lord and your desire to please Him in how you live out your marriage.

You will also demonstrate to a watching world what true, biblical submission and yielding should look like.

you will also demonstrate to the world how true Christ-centered love will lead someone to cherish their spouse.

3. Stay focused on the most important thing - spoiler alert - it’s not you or your marriage.

We refer to the church as the Bride of Christ.

She is the one who Jesus came to bring to Himself and who He intends to present as holy and blameless, in Himself.

The church - the Bride is not the most important thing - so what is the most important thing?

Jesus came to the earth, humbled Himself and ultimately gave His life, dying on an old rugged cross because it pleased his father, and pleasing His Father was the most important thing to Him.

This is not to diminish the importance of the church, but rather to elevate the importance of the pleasure of our Heavenly Father over all else.

In your marriage, as you serve one another - with the mind of Christ, you must never allow yourself to make the other person the point of your love.

It is very easy to elevate the other person to a place where you serve, love, and give yourself to them because you value them above all else.

This distorts God’s desires for you and your marriage and is called idolatry.

It is not pleasing to God and it is unfair to your spouse -

It is not pleasing to God because nothing should eclipse your love for Him

It’s not fair to your spouse because you are putting a value on them that only the Lord is worthy of - and they cannot bear that weight.

The point of you submitting to one another, of you serving one another, is to please the Lord.

This is the most important thing - that we seek to please and glorify the Lord.

When you seek this first, you will be better equipped to love the other, and in yet another divine paradox, you will love them more than if you made it your aim to love them above the Lord and His glory.

Marital Charge

My charge for you, as a couple is this:

Keep Christ at the very core of who you are as a married couple.

It is for His glory that you are standing here today.

Your marriage is not about your happiness or your fulfillment - but it is for the Lord’s glory.

But I promise you that if you both devote yourselves fully to the Lord’s plan for marriage, He will bring fulfillment and happiness.

But that will be based on HIM and not based on your spouse.

David, my charge to you, as the husband, and the Biblical head of your household is this:

Discover how to be a servant leader to Nicole, and one day to your children.

Become the Christ-centered shepherd/pastor of the little flock that the Lord entrusts you with.

Be the one who is most concerned with providing your family with fertile soil in which to grow in the Lord - making biblical community, worship, and service a priority and not an afterthought.

Be the one who joyfully leads your family to churh

Spend the rest of your life trying to find out how you can better love your bride and elevate her.

At the end of the day, the buck stops with you.

When the Lord wants answers about the spiritual condition of your family, He will come to you - not Nicole.

This is a heavy load to carry, and dare I say, and impossible load to carry on your own.

You will need to rely on the strength of the Lord, which will empower you to glorify Him in this role.

Nicole, my charge to you, as the wife - David’s biblical helper as described in Ephesians 5.

You will be the most uniquely gifted person on the planet to help David as he seeks to live out the will of the Lord.

David’s leadership is designed to operate at it’s best when you are functioning as his biggest supporter, advisor, counselor, lover, and friend.

Resist the temptation to get out in front of his leadership and fight the urge to stay quiet when you know you need to speak up - but do so with respect and love.

While the Lord comes to David to get answers about the Spiritual condition of your family, He holds you accountable for being the best helper you can be - and thus bring glory and honor to God.

DON’T TALK TOO FAST

DON’T TALK TOO FAST

VOWS - David first - Nicole Second

David and Nicole, we have unpacked some big truths about marriage and the marriage covenant today. If this is the type of love that you are committing to, then I will ask that you commit yourself to the Lord and to one another and to the life-long covenant of this marriage through the sharing of vows.

I, David/Nicole, --  take you, Nicole/David, -- to be my lawfully wedded (husband/wife), -- my constant friend, -- my faithful partner -- and my love -- from this day forward. -- In the presence of God, -- our family and friends, -- I offer you -- my solemn vow -- to be your faithful partner -- in sickness and in health, -- in good times and in bad, --  in joy and in sorrow. -- I promise -- to love you unconditionally, -- to support you in your goals, -- to honor and respect you, -- to laugh with you -- and cry with you, -- and to cherish you -- for as long as we both shall live.

BLESSING OF THE RINGS

David and Nicole are exchanging rings as a symbol of the covenant that they have made. Although small, these rings are made of precious metals and are in a perfect circle to signify the preciousness and ongoing nature of your covenant. The rings do not make you any more or less married, they are simply a reminder to you of the covenant promise that you have made to God and each other.

EXCHANGE RINGS

David place Nicole’s ring onto her ring finger of her left hand

Nicole place David’s ring onto his ring finger of his left hand.

“I offer you this ring -- as a symbol of my vow -- and my promise -- to love you unconditionally -- for the rest of our lives. -- To remind you -- of the covenant -- that we have made today -- before the Lord -- and our friends and family.

Cord of three strands

As a tangible symbol of the covenant that they are making today, David and Nicole will also be braiding a cord of three strands.

The imagery comes from the book of Ecclesiastes chapter 4, where it says that a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

This passage illustrates the importance of Christian companionship.

Two Christians that are bound together in Christ are stronger than the individuals themselves.

This passage from Ecclesiastes illustrates the importance of Christian companionship. Two Christians that are bound together in Christ are stronger than the individuals themselves. We believe that Christian marriage is about more than the union of one man and one woman. The Bible teaches us that God performs a miracle in our marriage, uniting us together in a covenant relationship with Him as one. The Cord of Three Strands is a symbol of that sacred union created on your wedding day.

But, Christian marriage is about more than the union of one man and one woman.

The Bible teaches us that God performs a miracle in our marriage, uniting us together in a covenant relationship with Him as one.

This is why there are three strands to be woven together - one representing each of them and a third representing the Lord.

They will braid three strands together, one representing each of them and a third representing the Lord.

if just one of the cords is absent, it is impossible to braid, and the strands will not hold together.

This elevates the importance of each person being completely committed to this marriage

David and Nicole, It is the Lord who makes the difference between you holding together or unraveling - do not forget this!

This also shows the absolute necessity of the marriage being woven together with the Lord.

Remember that as you take the time now to braid the cords and spend time in prayer.

Without one of the cords, it is impossible to braid

CLOSING COMMENTS

Before your friends and family, you have made vows and exchanged rings. Now, it is my great pleasure to say: By the power entrusted to me by our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, I now pronounce you, husband and wife, David you may kiss your bride.

PRESENTATION OF THE BRIDE AND GROOM

Would you please stand - May I present to you, Mr. and Mrs. David Brown

INVITATION TO RECEPTION - On behalf of David and Nicole, I would like to again, thank you for coming and invite you to stay for a cocktail hour and then a reception to celebrate what God has done!