Love Where You Are Called to Be

Introduction

Modern culture is infinitely divided over how our relationships determine our worth.

In light of the coronavirus outbreak, many people are questioning the basic ways in which we interact and socialize with each other as things that should be causes for panic.

NYT on 03/08: regular interactions in NYC are now seen as potential threats; “Am I next?”

The fundamental expression of our humanity is becoming a potential health crisis.

As rampant individualism spreads, we’re constantly reminded that we were never made to be our own ()

David Brooks article in The Atlantic: “The Nuclear Family Was a Mistake”

Individual families who remain in utter relational isolation from their communities, the relational fabric of our country continues to become increasingly fractured.

The need for “forged families”

Sexuality and marriage are often seen as absolute goods which can solve the deficiencies within the makeup of our souls.

Will and Annie Durant: “The first goal of any civilization is to bank the eddy of human sexuality.”

As ends in itself, human sexuality is nothing but destructive to both body and soul, eviscerated of what it is meant to achieve within God’s design for those made in His image.

In our post-Obergefell culture, sexuality is allowed to subvert all established institutions which do not submit to the authority of the autonomous self.

As we will see in our passage today, the Christian view of sexuality, marriage, and social status locates the worth of human beings not in their possession or expression of these things but rather in their status in the eyes of God as those ransomed by Son of God to be his people. The uniqueness of being human is not found just by looking to the diverse ways in which we express our humanity. Instead, we ground our purpose according to our individual and corporate identity as found in our sharing in the body of Christ.

marriage, and social status locates the worth of human beings not in their possession or expression of these things but rather in their status in the eyes of God as those ransomed by Son of God to be his people. The uniqueness of being human is not found just by looking to the diverse ways in which we express our humanity. Instead, we ground our purpose according to our individual and corporate identity as found in our sharing in the body of Christ.

A Calling Not Only Our Own (vv. 1-9)

The Corinthian church has been perpetually misrepresenting the nature of their identity as Christians.

A multi-dimensional problem with authority (ch. 1-6)

The only cure for the chaos in Corinth is to remind themselves of how utterly distinct Christ calls them to be.

Marriage, like any other institution, has a variety of representations in any society.

Polygamy (Utah set to make polygamy nothing more than an infraction - equivalent to a parking ticket)

Modern secular view: entirely contractual, not covenantal

Eli Finkel: the self-expressive marriage

The rise of no-fault divorce laws (first: Reagan as governor of CA in 1969)

Leads to polyamory (an open marriage implies a lack of obligations)

We must be careful when reading texts on marriage in Scripture to not simply transfer all of its concepts without properly gleaning the principles it has for us today as we face these same questions as Paul did in regards to the Corinthians (contextualization)

The Corinthians are caving to the notion that to not be of the flesh means to have nothing to do with it at all (v. 1)

The problem of Gnosticism (dualism between both body and spirit)

A mystical union occurs in marriage in which two truly become one (vv. 2-4)

: “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”

This verse frames the entirety of the biblical view of marriage and sexuality. Men and women, as those who uniquely bear the image of God, fulfill the calling He has placed upon them when they come together in the covenant of marriage.

Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

Christians have to view marriage not as a fringe benefit for those who feel inclined to pursue it but as a distinct calling for them to pursue by giving themselves over to self-sacrificial.

Marriage serves as an image about union with Christ for those who are in His church.

: “This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”

Ray Ortlund: “Every faithful Christian marriage points beyond itself to the perfect union we all share with the Lord Jesus Christ. Our little metaphorical marriages can always draw strength from the real marriage we share with our Savior.”

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Marriage is a blessing from God to humanity that should be cherished at all costs.

Our conservative view of marriage must be defined as a robustly biblical understanding of marriage.

By reinterpreting marriage as a covenant instead of as a necessary institution for social cohesion or a chance commodity for fleeting pleasure, the Christian covenantal understanding of the union between a man and a woman is truly liberating.

The calling to singleness must be honored and recognized by the church (vv. 6-7)

A popular way of misconstruing this text is to say that singleness is a higher calling than being led to pursue marriage due to Paul’s status as an apostle (monasticism and asceticism in the RCC: to preserve their hold on more tightly to the keys to the kingdom)

A false view of the church: the realm of perfecting saints

A right view of the church: a gathering of those set apart for godly living and striving towards it together

Singleness is a spiritual gift so that those who are within the church and possess it might entirely give themselves over to ministry amongst the saints and strengthening the body.

Making an idol out of being in a relationship is a toxic result of our society’s privileging of what we project to the world rather than how it is we contribute to it.

For those who grow restive in it,

Those who grow impatient in their singleness must strive to ground their desires in what God has called good (v. 9)

An unkempt flame only leads to destruction (the fireplace analogy).

We cannot serve the Lord faithfully when we have disordered loves.

Augustine: “Thou hast made us for thyself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it finds its rest in thee.”

Any situation in life calls for continued reflection on why God has brought us into it in the first place, and singleness can be one of those fruitful times in which the Lord has much to teach us if we seek after Him in the midst of it.

Acknowledge your freedom to serve others that God has given you to have.

Don’t see the withholding of a relationship when one is desired as a punishment but as a time for cultivating godly virtue.

Song of Solomon 2:7 ESV

I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or the does of the field, that you not stir up or awaken love until it pleases.

Song of Solomon 2:7 ESV

I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or the does of the field, that you not stir up or awaken love until it pleases.

: “I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or the does of the field, that you not stir up or awaken love until it pleases.”

A Reconciliation Not Only Our Own (vv. 10-16)

Paul contrasts his earlier advice on singleness with his address to whose who are already married since such a covenant made between men and women is directly under God’s authority (vv. 10-11)

A biblical theology of divorce prioritizes the preservation of the vows which have been made without bringing harm upon those who are bound to keep them.

: “For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the Lord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless.”

God’s hatred for divorce flows from his animosity towards violating faithfulness to His covenants.

The works of the prophets are essentially condemnations of the infidelity of Israel towards the Lord who ransomed them for Himself.

The imperative for staying with one’s spouse irrespective of personal feelings concerning the warmth of the affections they might feel for them models the way in which God remains pledged to us despite when we are apathetic towards Him.

: “If we are faithless, he remains faithful— for he cannot deny himself.”

Preference or mission cannot serve as grounds for divorce.

Dr. Tom Schreiner (briefly recount story of his friend who was leaving his wife): “Is it worth it to go to hell for sex?”

David Instone-Brewer: Roman law’s support of “divorce by separation” cannot be used by Christians who claim a higher authority than that of the state.

The mission the church in seeking reconciliation in favor of divorce is to do its best to draw the hopes and desires of husband and wife outside of themselves and towards Christ.

Divorce began as a concession in light of human depravity.

: “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”

Yet if this cannot be achieved, and infidelity has been committed or abandonment has taken place, the church is to be a haven for those who have had to go through the soul-wrenching process of divorce.

One’s faithfulness to Christ does not override the covenants they have already made in His sight (vv. 12 - 16)

The Gnostic tendency to purify everything about one’s material existence led to a disavowal of marriage. (Augustine and the Manicheans’ call to celibacy)

There is no such thing as a “missionary marriage.” Only Christ can save us from our sins, including an unbelieving spouse.

Only Christ can save.

There are temporal ties that bind us (v. 12-14).

The church is meant to be a localized gathering for those who have been set apart within the communities they already occupy, bringing together those with all kinds of relational baggage and commitments in tow with them into the sanctuary.

Marriage, as an inherent good for the world, can and is meant to be a wonderful, embodied display of the realities of the gospel. When this is lived out by a believing spouse while the other has not submitted to Christ themselves, it witnesses to the glorious grace that has been achieved for us.

Sanctification = blessing through distinction in holy living

John Calvin: “The piety of the one has more effect in sanctifying the marriage than the impiety of the other in polluting it.”

But I (not the Lord) say to the rest: If any brother has an unbelieving wife and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. Also, if any woman has an unbelieving husband and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce her husband. For the unbelieving husband is made holy by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy by the husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is they are holy.

Children receive a worthy witness by having even one godly parent (v. 14b)

Rest in what God has done to the best of your ability (vv. 15-16)

Marriage Story by Noah Baumbach

Things can fall apart without our ability to recognize them in time. We’re imperfect, and our ability to handle relationships will inevitably be so as well.

Discord is not to define the body of Christ ()

Our only resort is to trust in God.

A Place Not Only Our Own (vv. 17-24)

The true mark of salvation is to possess Christ in spirit and truth (vv. 17-20)

Diversity in the body calls for a diversity of positions to occupy in society.

The people of God are one (vv. 18-19)

: “For he himself is our peace, who has made us both one and has broken down in his flesh the dividing wall of hostility.”

The true children of Abraham are the children of obedience.

We find unity in diversity thanks to the reconciling work of Christ in bringing together His body from all corners of the globe.

Social conditions do not prevail over the promises of the kingdom of heaven (vv. 21 - 24)

Our modern lens judges worth according to a paradigm of either total liberty or totalitarian subjugation, whereas the biblical perspective primarily judges persons according to a dichotomy between either sin or righteousness.

: “For as many of you as were baptized into Christ have put on Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. And if you are Christ’s, then you are Abraham’s offspring, heirs according to promise.”

Our true status and freedom is in Christ (v. 22-23)

For as many of you as were baptized into Christ have put on Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. And if you are Christ’s, then you are Abraham’s offspring, heirs according to promise.

The atonement was redemptive, for there was a price that had to be paid which could not be paid by us.

Our salvation in Christ is the great equalizer of all of humanity and serves to unite it despite whatever else might distinguish us apart from one another.

: “For as many of you as were baptized into Christ have put on Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. And if you are Christ’s, then you are Abraham’s offspring, heirs according to promise.”

To be content where we are is to demonstrate our trust in God (v. 24)

Conclusion

What we are bound to does not define our ultimate worth in the sight of God.

Our successes and failures in relationships are in the realm of the changing tides of our affections.

What we have with those around us is to be cherished, and what is lost must be mourned.

Who we are must have its foundation in who Christ has declared us to be.

Our identity in Christ should always encourage us to behold the Son of God who took upon Himself a human nature so that we might become the people of God.

Only by understanding our objective dignity and exaltation in the work of the Lord of glory can we subjectively experience what it means to be in and of Him.

How we live must be shaped by recognizing what keeps us together more than what keeps us apart.

By looking to the faith we have always confessed in accordance with the Word of God and the centuries of faithful teaching which have sought to uphold it, we can stand firm amidst challenges to balkanize according to factions which have more to do with our whims than contending for truth.

The frontiers of our vocations are meant to encourage rather than discourage us as to how to be faithful where we are.