Lament and Love

Introduction: We believers are good at covering up our grief, but often not good at grieving well. Not being great at it myself, Let’s look to scripture for how to grieve well. What do we do as a Church....

When it Feels Like Everything is Collapsing...

1. A lament is a passionate expression of grief. The entire book of Lamentations is one long lament, beginning with the first chapter’s description of Jerusalem. The city’s been torn apart and devastated by her enemies, and now the song being sung is appropriately and honestly sad. How is grief and sadness expressed in your faith community? Do you leave room for people to be honest in worship, even if their honest feelings are negative?

Jeremiah - Because he suggested that during the siege, that people turn themselves over to the Babylonians, he was captured by Judah’s King and lowered into a well as a prison.

People are feeling any number of things right now. Is it right to call some of what they’re feeling grief?

Kessler: Yes, and we’re feeling a number of different griefs. We feel the world has changed, and it has. We know this is temporary, but it doesn’t feel that way, and we realize things will be different. Just as going to the airport is forever different from how it was before 9/11, things will change and this is the point at which they changed. The loss of normalcy; the fear of economic toll; the loss of connection. This is hitting us and we’re grieving. Collectively. We are not used to this kind of collective grief in the air. - “Anticipatory Grief - Uncertainty of the Future, and anticipation of Loss in the future.”

- What have we lost, what are we anticipating losing? We are seeing all of these emotions - because as a nation, as a world we are grieving. What have we lost. We are losing human contact, we are losing jobs, we are losing sometimes purpose, we are losing things we are usually free to do, some feel like they are losing their minds. Loss of special events we had planned, loss of Sporting events, or other school events, of graduation ceremonies. I have heard others describe this as a prison in our own homes.

- We are grieving.

- Have you seen anyone in Denial - "This can't be happening?" I was there early in March. I still hear it, "What has happened to our World?"

- Have you seen anyone in Anger - Looking for someone to blame? - I see Democrats blaming Trump, I see Trump Blaming China and the Media, I see Republicans Blame Whitmore, I see Conspiratists Blame the One World Order, I see Citizens Blame other Citizens for not social distancing, and blame the police for not doing enough, or blaming the police for doing too much.

- Do you know anyone experiencing Bargaining - Have your prayers turned to, God if you would do this, I will do this for you.

- Depression - I know one person already who called me in a depressive state - "I have no purpose."

- Do you know anyone at Acceptance: "There may be some, but many of us may also just be in denial and calling it Acceptance."

- This is non-linear, and people grieve at different paces. - Our tendency is to want people to grieve at our pace - Families at funerals - Always amazed at how different people share different feelings, and concerned by the way others are grieving. - When we see denial, anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance - we are seeing people grieve.

“Blessed are those who Mourn, for they will be comforted.”

We Lament.

But lament is different than crying because lament is a form of prayer. It is more than just the expression of sorrow or the venting of emotion. Lament talks to God about pain. And it has a unique purpose: trust. It is a divinely-given invitation to pour out our fears, frustrations, and sorrows for the purpose of helping us to renew our confidence in God. - Desiring God.com Mark Vroegop., “Laments turn toward God when sorrow tempts you to run from him.”

Lament helps us name what we are feeling, Biblical Lament helps us Name what we are feeling collectively - Lamentations includes a lot of “Us” Language, and is in the Bible so that the People of God can pray together.

Structure 1 vs 1-18: Naming our Misery - vs. 1“I am the man who has seen affliction by the rod of the Lord’s wrath.”

It recognizes God’s Soveriegnty - Wait I thought the Babylonians were seiging Jerusalem, not God, - But Lamentations realizes that God allows it to happen, and in fact it is a part of God’s Justice - Lamentations recognizes that this is happening because of Israel’s sin. - It still sucks.

It calls out to God - Rather than turn from God it is a constant turning to God. - Feel like God does not hear us.

1. Verses 8 -”Even when I call out or cry for help, he shuts out my prayer.” of this chapter talk about the fear that God must not be hearing our prayers when we are in continued pain. This song from the TV series Nashville called “Believing” talks about this very feeling: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZicDN3QvOM.

It comes out of a deep well of Trust - Worry is not believing God will get it right; bitterness is believing God got it wrong,” - Timothy Keller.

True Biblical Lament brings us closer to God and His Love.

Lament Recalls God’s Love.

I think we think the opposite, that if we Complain to God, we will grow more bitter towards God. But the Jeremiah sees the opposite, and it begins by his remembering God’s Love and Faithfulness, and His Mercy.

Structure 2 vs 19-38: Remembering God’s Unfailing Love. vs. 22-23“Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

1. “There are a lot of people who struggle mightily with this whole idea. They say, ‘If God is a God of love, he doesn’t send people to hell. If God is a God of judgment, he can’t be a God of love. I can’t reconcile the two things.’ Yet the Bible insists that not only is God a God both of love and wrath—not only do those two things not conflict with each other, but they actually establish each other. One without the other is nonsense. One without the other is meaningless. If you actually try to somehow extract, remove surgically, excise the Christian message of the wrath and judgment of God, what you actually have is nothing left at all.” – Timothy Keller, “Why Doesn’t Life Make Sense? His Justice” (October 25, 1992)

God promised in Exodus, that he visits his wrath to the 3rd and 4th Generation, but to 1,000 generations he visits his love and mercy. In other words, if God makes due on his justice, then he will make due on his love and mercy, which according to Exodus extends much further.

1. If we are faithless, He remains faithful—for He cannot deny Himself,” (2 Tim. 2:13). Jeremiah understood this principle as he wrote Lamentations: God is always faithful to His own character. It is because of this belief that he was able to say “I still dare to hope,” (v. 21), “For no one is abandoned by the Lord forever. Though he brings grief, he also shows compassion because of the greatness of his unfailing love. For he does not enjoy hurting people or causing them sorrow,” (vv. 31-33).

Structure 3 vs 39-56: Confession and Honesty vs. 41-42“Let us lift up our hearts and our hands to God in heaven, and say: “We have sinned and rebelled and you have not forgiven.

Structure 4 vs 57-63: God Sees Injustice and hears our prayers vs. 56-58 “You heard my plea: “Do not close your ears to my cry for relief.”  You came near when I called you, and you said, “Do not fear.” You, Lord, took up my case; you redeemed my life.

Laments encourage us to never give up on our prayers and turning to God - God is listening, God sees what is going on, and God cares about the injustices even more than we do.

Lament moves us in our grief through the stages together towards a deeper understanding of God’s love. And enables us to control what we can, and should control, but give over control to God for those things we can not. - Vengeance.

Structure 5 vs 64-66: Trust in God’s Justice vs 64 “Pay them back what they deserve, Lord, for what their hands have done.” This is Acceptance - that the pain and injustice we experience God will ultimately take care of. Justice is outside of our control, Trust and following Christ is in our Control, Vengeance and God’s ultimate redemption is in his Power and Control.

Four Elements of Lament - Turn to God, Bring your Complaint, Ask Boldly for Help, Choose to Trust.

Conclusion: Let’s Lament together....