Hope for Broken Relationships

INTRODUCTION

GOOD MORNING

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY

A special Happy Mother’s Day to all our moms out there

Thank you for your love and sacrifice -

To those who have struggled with childbirth - experienced infertility or miscarriage or maybe you are single and long to be married and start a family.

Romans 12:15 We “rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep”

TRANSITION

We are continuing in our series through 2 Corinthians, focusing on chapter 7, verses 2 - 16

The big idea of today’s passage illustrated how we should respond to relational conflict as Christians?

Important Because:

What happens when you put a group of sinners together in a small space over a long period of time, without escape? And then introduce fear, uncertainty, and possible financial hardships. Now force those people to interact. Do you think there will be conflict?

TIME magazine had a article titled, “11 Ways to stay Married Amid Coronavirus Concerns”

PSYCHOLOGY TODAY wrote an article, “5 Relationship Strategies for 24/7 Togetherness”

FOCUS ON THE FAMILY, “Tending to Relational Dynamics of Household Life During the Pandemic.”

My assumption

You are are experiencing stress and conflict with others during this time.

The previously mentioned articles may very well have helpful advise.

Today - I want us to take time to see what God has to say to us through the life of Paul and how he handled the conflict in his life.

READ 2 Corinthians 7:2-16

HOOK - RELATIONAL CONFLICT

MAKE ROOM IN YOUR HEARTS (7:2)

Our Family

My wife and I have 6 amazing kids - yet, at times they have not all gotten along with each other - sometimes, a sign was posted on the bedroom door - do not enter!

The door was slammed, distance established - reconnection was disallowed.

Paul’s Situation

This is what happened between Paul and some of the Christians in Corinth. Outsiders were speaking again Paul and began to sway the hearts of those who were listening. When Paul hurt their feelings this reinforced those false voices and now the door to their heart was closed off to Paul with a sign saying, “Do not enter.” You aren’t welcome.

Paul is pleading with them, “make room in your hearts for us.”

EXTERNAL FIGHTING | INTERNAL FEAR (7:5)

WHEN EVERYTHING IS BROKEN

“We faced conflict in every direction...” (NLT)

“With battles on the outside...” (NLT)

“And fear on the inside...” (NLT)

QUESTION

IS THERE SOMEONE IN YOUR LIFE WITH WHOM YOU ARE CURRENTLY EXPERIENCING CONFLICT?

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN THERE?

CONFLICT - pandemic, finances, cooped up, convictions about reopening.

FIGHTING - spouse, family, kids, co-workers, friends....

FEAR - circumstances and relationships.

COMFORTING TO KNOW THE APOSTLE PAUL ENDURED REAL LIFE

Also a comfort to know that the Apostle Paul also faced these struggles.

Friction also creates opportunity, strength - not also friction breaks

HOPE - RELATIONAL COMFORT

COMFORT (7:6-7)

HOPE

“God encourages those who are discouraged...”

“God encouraged Paul through his relationship with Titus and the Corinthians”

We are relational beings

Sometimes, the way God chooses to comfort the broken hearted is through the people around us.

BUT… what happens when the people who COULD bring us COMFORT are the ones who BRING CONFLICT?

HARD WORK - RELATIONAL CONFRONTATION

PAUL WROTE A LETTER OF CONFRONTATION (7:8)

God used the Apostle Paul to plant the church in Corinth

They began struggling so Paul wrote a letter, what we know as 1 Corinthians.

That didn’t go so well so Paul made a quick trip to see them face to face - Paul’s calls this the painful visit - they reject and mock him so he leaves and cancels the trip he originally had planned

Paul writes a 2nd letter we do not have -

In this letter Paul directly confronts what is broken in their relationship and calls them to be reconciled.

Paul is experiencing external fighting and internal fear

We don’t know exactly the nature of this fighting a fear but we do see indications of Paul’s concern that these people that he loved and cared about would ultimately choose to reject him.

FEAR - would have us believe that if we say anything we will just make it worse. If I bring this up them I’ll be completely rejected or our relationship will be completely lost. FEAR WOULD SILENCE AND PARALYZE US in relationship with others.

HOPE - led Paul to believe that the situation could change. (7:9). Hope said the relationship could be stronger now than it was then. Hope spoke reconciliation and restoration.

QUESTION:

IS YOUR HOPE FOR RECONCILIATION GREATER THAN YOUR FEAR OF REJECTION?

What relationship in your life is currently experiencing conflict? Is your heart listening to the voice of hope or fear?

Hope - God can fix this. There can be reconciliation

Fear - Don’t say anything or you will make things worse. The status quo is better than nothing at all. Maybe you are afraid to deal with your own part in the conflict.

WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE FOT YOU TO LOVINGLY PRESS INTO A RELATIONSHIP TO HAVE THAT CRITICAL CONVERSATION?

Paul wrote a letter

What will you do?

Practically - you have a name and a situation in mind. You see that person’s face

How will you take that step toward then, even if it is painful at first.

RESPONSE - GODLY REPENTANCE

PAUL GIVES US A TREMENDOUSLY CLEAR PICTURE OF THE RESPONSE WE SHOULD HOPE TO SEE

2 Corinthians 7:10-11

GODLY SORROW vs WORLDY SORROW

There is a difference between godly sorrow and worldly sorrow

Not all, “I’m sorry” are the same?

Kids, says you’re sorry, begrudgingly, “Sorry” But you know they aren’t sorry.

Sorry I got caught (self-concern about penalty) vs sorry I hurt you (other-concern about pain)

If your sorrow is more focused on yourself and your own discomfort then you aren’t really sorry.

GODLY SORROW (10-11)

Produces repentance

Repentance leads to salvation without regret

Godly sorrow cultivates an earnestness to act differently, to change

There is deep concern for the way we treat others, there is a fear that we might do it again, a zeal to improve and change.

WORLDLY SORROW

Worldly grief produces death

The juxtaposition with godly sorrow is almost comical.

Look at everything godly sorrow produces but then worldly sorrow merely produces death.

Death is separation

Physical Death - YES

Spiritual Death- YES

Relational Death - YES

QUESTION

HOW DO YOU RESPOND WHEN CONFRONT?

Our tendency is to think about how other people respond and if their response is sufficiently godly or not.

When you pursue reconciliation in a relationship with someone - pray these verses over them that they respond with godly sorrow.

When someone confronts you - remember these verses!

My knee-jerk reaction is self-justification

I didn’t mean it, you misunderstood me, I was right, You’re the problem, yeah, whatever...

I have to talk to my heart

Remember - you aren’t perfect, you sin and this hurts people

Remember - you are forgiven, Jesus paid for this sin so you aren’t condemned so the appropriate response is to confess your sin.

Remember - humble confession and repentance is how we walk in purity with God and with us.

Remember - trust in God’s Spirit within you and not your own strength

RESULT - RELATIONAL COMFORT

HOPE FULFILLED / COMPLETION

2 Corinthians 7:13 ESV

Therefore we are comforted. And besides our own comfort, we rejoiced still more at the joy of Titus, because his spirit has been refreshed by you all.

The hope of reconciliation - resulted in reconciliation

This is what we long for in our relationships.

CONCLUSION

BEHOLD & REFLECT

BEHOLD

Broken Relationship - between God and us (rebellion, hatred, lost)

Drawing Near in Confrontation - with loving kindness, the Law of God exposed our sin,

A contrite heart is what God desires

Repentance & Belief in Jesus

Worldly Sorrow - sorry about that Jesus

I don’t want to go to hell

But can I keep my pet sin and claim your grace

Godly Sorrow/Repentance

Turn away from our sin

Turn toward and follow after God and live according to his ways

Result - restored relationship

REFLECT

Broken Relationship - between you and someone else

Draw near in confrontation. Allow your hope for restoration to be greater than your inward fears

Pray for and display godly sorrow

Trust God with the results

You can’t control the other persons heart or response.

QUESTIONS

WHO DO YOU NEED TO CONFRONT?

Who?

How and when will you step toward them?

Will you respond with hope or fear?

Pray for them.

HOW WILL YOU RESPOND WHEN CONFRONTED?

Worldly sorrow - self-interest

Godly sorrow - Humble Repentance