Underrated

Introduction

First time I became a father

July 4th, 2006

Ronnie and his Dimetapp stare

Today we’re going to talk about fathers

YouVersion: Underrated

Bible is filled with dad’s doing wonderful things!

Abraham was known as Father Abraham!

David appointed Solomon as king when he wasn’t next in line

Noah who’s righteousness kept his family alive

Same men also made huge mistakes!

Noah’s drunken stupor created a family disaster

David is not present in Solomon’s life

Nathan is said to have raised him

Abraham lies about his wife being his wife twice

Not to mention he kicks his 13 yr old son into the desert

And then tries to sacrifice his other son!

(JK of those were counted as righteousness)

Joseph

One guy had an incredibly hard job

And we usually don’t talk too much about him - Joseph

Given the task of raising the Son of God

The Creator of heaven and earth

The Author of our salvation, Jesus Christ

Yes, I’m talking about Jesus’ step-dad

Hard to find a dad more underrated than him

YouVersion: Underrated

Matthew 1, 2 and 13

Mostly Christmas passages - Christmas in June?!

Jesus was probably not born on December 25th!

There was a census, travel would not be Winter

Shepherd’s were with their flocks - maybe Spring

Star in the sky could be anomaly in October of 7 BC

Or some point to Venus and Saturn merging in 2 BC

The date? June 17th!

If so, the real Christmas was last Wednesday!

In reality, we have no clue - except it probably wasn’t Winter

Let’s look at the little bit we read about Joseph!

5 Examples of a Godly Father

A Godly Father is

1. Merciful

Imagine you’re Joseph

Your betrothed has a baby bump

Back then, a fiance was as good as married

To end the relationship required a divorce

Matthew 1:18–19 ESV

18 Now the birth of Jesus Christ took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been betrothed to Joseph, before they came together she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit. 19 And her husband Joseph, being a just man and unwilling to put her to shame, resolved to divorce her quietly.

What a painful situation for Joseph!

Surely, he felt betrayed

You know what it feels like to be betrayed...

It brings pain, embarrassment, and anger!

Family court for Bree

People want revenge

Story of divorced guy

Wife gets the house, he pays the bills

She turns on every electrical appliance

She runs the garden hose into the gutter

Sets the heater to 85 and opens the windows

Joseph could do the same; his wife is a cheater

But he was unwilling to put her to shame

That’s love and compassion… mercy

How does it look for a father to be merciful?

How do you respond when your kids disappoint you?

How do you feel when your wife disappoints you?

To be a JUST man, you must be a MERCIFUL one!

Interesting! How is MERCY a JUSTICE issue?

Seems he would be JUSTIFIED in being brutal to his cheating wife!

Except that’s not true...

AND little did he know, the Son he would raise would show mercy Himself

That child would die on a cross He didn’t deserve

Rather than getting revenge on those people

He also was unwilling to put us to shame

James 2:13 ESV

13 For judgment is without mercy to one who has shown no mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment.

We all NEED mercy to have hope!

That’s what Jesus is all about

How can we then not show others mercy?

Joseph is living that out here: rather than revenge, he chooses mercy

Good thing! Because then Joseph learns the truth

Matthew 1:20–25 ESV

20 But as he considered these things, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, “Joseph, son of David, do not fear to take Mary as your wife, for that which is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. 21 She will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.” 22 All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had spoken by the prophet: 23 “Behold, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and they shall call his name Immanuel” (which means, God with us). 24 When Joseph woke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him: he took his wife, 25 but knew her not until she had given birth to a son. And he called his name Jesus.

Here’s the next thing we learn about being a Godly father:

2. Courageous

The angel says, “Don’t be AFRAID to take Mary as your wife.”

It’s interesting what the angel doesn’t say...

Don’t be stupid! Don’t be mad! Don’t be depressed...

He says, don’t be afraid!

What does Joseph have to be afraid of?

First of all, if she’s an adulterer can she do it again?

Trust is a HUGE component of marriage!

When that’s broken, there’s plenty reason to be scared!

But that’s not exactly what the angel is concerned about

The angel explains the baby is from the Holy Spirit

GREAT! Everyone’s gonna believe THAT!

Joe, you need to leave that harlot!

I can’t, the baby is from the Holy Spirit

Oh, Joe… Don’t be an idiot, man!

It’s true!

Uh huh...

This would follow Joseph, Mary and Jesus their whole lives

There’s a spitting match between Jesus and some Jews in John 8

Talking about how He brings freedom from sin

He talks about Abraham being their Father

Then He refers to God as His Father

They say, Abraham is our Father!

He says, no you’re not!

You’d be doing things like Abraham if you were!

Instead, you’re doing the works of your father, the devil!

Then in verse 41 they say this:

John 8:41 ESV

41 You are doing the works your father did.” They said to him, “We were not born of sexual immorality. We have one Father—even God.”

That sure sounds like a dig at Mary!

We weren’t born of sexual immorality like YOU Jesus!

At the beginning they ask:

John 8:19 ESV

19 They said to him therefore, “Where is your Father?” Jesus answered, “You know neither me nor my Father. If you knew me, you would know my Father also.”

Where is your dad? Do you even know who he is?

Jesus says, if you knew me, you’d know my dad is God the Father

If Jesus dealt with this, I’m sure Jospeh heard it all the time

If you’re a dad, sometimes you have to be brave

You have to take a stand for your kids

Then you know that others may not get that

My friend Robin has a son who has Tourette syndrome

Most know it as kids who yell swear words uncontrollably

But they show up as all sorts of tics

Dan Aykroyd and David Beckham have it

Rob has to deal with people staring at his sons behavior

He’s been kicked out of schools and judged by strangers

Parents look and say, “Control your kid”

All the while, they don’t know the truth about his situation

He doesn’t love his child less… he stands up for him

Not all kids have that, but dads still have to be brave

There’s nothing like being a father, and watching your kids face the world

What’s worse? Being a believer with kids who are not

You’re helpless and scared...

But you have to stand for them and with them

That leads us into the next example of a Godly father

3. Sacrificial

Matthew 2:13–15 ESV

13 Now when they had departed, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream and said, “Rise, take the child and his mother, and flee to Egypt, and remain there until I tell you, for Herod is about to search for the child, to destroy him.” 14 And he rose and took the child and his mother by night and departed to Egypt 15 and remained there until the death of Herod. This was to fulfill what the Lord had spoken by the prophet, “Out of Egypt I called my son.”

Dads, you all know that feeling

It’s 2:00am, you hear a noise, you grab your bathrobe and a baseball bat...

There’s that adrenaline surging...

You almost WANT to find a guy in a ski mask waiting in the kitchen

It’s built into us to be protectors and providers

A Godly dad is more concerned about his family than himself

That’s a Christian principle PERIOD

Philippians 2:3–4 ESV

3 Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. 4 Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.

That’s what Joseph is doing

I’m sure this was NOT the plan!!

He was getting ready to marry the girl of his dreams!

Then she gets pregnant by someone else, finds out its God, everyone is gossiping about him, he goes on a trip for the census, finds out the king knows about it and wants to kill his Son, so he changes plans and heads off to Egypt!

Sounds like a rough year! Kinda like 2020!

No one knows how long they’re in Egypt...

Some say a few months, some 6-7 years

Either way, he left his family, his home, his business...

Why? Not because it’s better for him, but for his family

Even more specific, he’s doing it because of the 4th thing:

4. Obedient to God

Joseph is responding to the messages from God

He’s heard about Mary, the trip to Egypt, and now one more time:

Matthew 2:19–21 ESV

19 But when Herod died, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared in a dream to Joseph in Egypt, 20 saying, “Rise, take the child and his mother and go to the land of Israel, for those who sought the child’s life are dead.” 21 And he rose and took the child and his mother and went to the land of Israel.

A Godly father is obedient to God

But understand that its not to earn something

Being a Godly dad isn’t about doing what you’re told so you can have the “Best Dad” award in heaven

It’s not about following rules to make your kids better, healthier, more competent...

It’s about realizing that God is in control, and He knows best

Matthew 16:24 ESV

24 Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.

It’s about setting ourselves aside

Mostly because we know it’s a bad thing to get our own way

This last one is a special one

This isn’t an obvious point

You just notice it in the nuances of the text

Always struggled with “A Boy Named Sue”

Dad names his son sue

He finds his dad and tries to kill him

Before he does, his dad says:

And he said, "Son, this world is rough And if a man's gonna make it, he's gotta be tough And I know I wouldn't be there to help ya along So I give ya that name and I said goodbye I knew you'd have to get tough or die And it's the name that helped to make you strong"

Yeah he said, "Now you just fought one heck of a fight And I know you hate me, and you got the right To kill me now, and I wouldn't blame you if you do But ya ought to thank me, before I die For the gravel in ya guts and the spit in ya eye 'Cause I'm the son-of-a-you-know-what that named you "Sue"

I got all choked up and I threw down my gun Called him my Pa, and he called me his son And I come away with a different point of view And I think about him, now and then Every time I try and every time I win And if I ever have a son, I think I'm gonna name him Bill or George! Anything but Sue! I still hate that name!

Wait a minute, that’s not being a dad!

He says, I knew I wouldn’t be there, so I gave you a girly name so you’d get tough. You’re welcome!

Aw, thanks dad! You’re the best!

No, being a dad takes a little more than that!

The final thing we’ll mention, is a Godly dad is:

5. Present

Matthew 13:54–55 ESV

54 and coming to his hometown he taught them in their synagogue, so that they were astonished, and said, “Where did this man get this wisdom and these mighty works? 55 Is not this the carpenter’s son? Is not his mother called Mary? And are not his brothers James and Joseph and Simon and Judas?

Not just the Son of a carpenter, but a carpenter Himself

Mark 6:3 ESV

3 Is not this the carpenter, the son of Mary and brother of James and Joses and Judas and Simon? And are not his sisters here with us?” And they took offense at him.

It’s not a surprise that Joseph’s son is a carpenter

(Actually a laborer… maybe a carpenter, mason, handyman, etc.)

My dad was an engineer in a paper mill for 34 years

Both my brother and I worked there (11 years and still there)

My brother-in-law Andy works for Pomona PD

His dad? A police officer as well

Charlie Sheen’s dad? Martin Sheen!

Enrique Iglesias’ dad? Julio Iglesias!

Ziggy Marley’s dad? Bob Marley!

Payton and Eli Manning’s dad? Archie Manning!

Ben Stiller’s dad? Jerry Stiller!

He said, “If my parents were, like, plumbers, who knows what I would be doing?”

Maybe plumbing?

It’s common for a son to follow in his dad’s steps...

Especially if his dad spends time with him...

I don’t know if Ronnie will be a pastor someday or not

(Like Billy Graham and Franklin Graham)

And no, I’m not putting myself on Billy Graham’s level...

But I will walk with him through whatever he chooses to do

See, I learned a lesson early on with Ronnie

When I grew up, I played outside a lot

I loved basketball and eventually hockey

I loved skateboarding and playing the drums

Ronnie doesn’t like hockey or baseball, he loves gaming

I played some video games, but it wasn’t my thing

Mostly sports games

I didn’t care about Mortal Kombat, Zelda or Mega Man

It’s not my interest, but that doesn’t mean we can’t spent time together!

I promise you I have left a mark on his life

He listens to Billy Talent (A band from before his time)

We play together in Rocket League

He changed his first light switch a few weeks ago...

Gracie too

She is learning the guitar

I quiz her all the time on classic rock bands

She’s starting to get it!

We play Scattergories together

Why? Because I believe spending time with your kids is important

I believe that because just like Jesus, my dad taught me that

I wonder how many things from Jesus’ ministry we see

That his humanity learned from his earthly dad, Joseph...

Closing

Here’s thing about these types of messages...

They can become a trial for dads

My dad doesn’t do that, my dad is a deadbeat, I hate my dad...

Yes, I want to encourage dad’s to live this way

But here’s the thing, you can’t do it perfectly!

No dad does all these exactly right!

As much as a dad may try, we’re still sinful, fallen, finite people

And I wonder how much encouragement dad’s get at home

There’s something weird about saying nice things to dad

Can you say, hey dad, I know you’re doing the best you can

I respect you unconditionally, dad

Thanks for not giving up on us

Wives, what if you say, I’m only seeking your attention

What could these things do for your dad? Your husband?

Finally, dads, I want to challenge you

Get rid of the excuses...

God has called you to be the man

He has equipped you, empowered you, He backs you

Because HE called you to be a dad

I challenge you to say, Today, I will be a Godly man

In my marriage, with my kids, at my work, in my church...

Because Christ has paved the way for me

And it is He that strengthens me alone\

Prayer