Christian Home
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Transcript
Handout
Handout
Christian Home Essentials
Christian Home Essentials
A new series we are introducing tonight that we may learn, grow and unite together as we look at the Christian home. This series will be more interactive, class style, vs. lecture/sermon style, so as we start be prepared to get involved!
Question: When you think of a home, what are some home essentials?
Question: When you think about a “Christian Home” what would you consider an essential?
(Marriage Institution Picture Inserted Here)
I think we can look around this world, this country and see that the institution of marriage is struggling.
Some reasons for struggling institution of marriage
People trying to redefine what constitutes a marriage.
Is living together for a period of time and then what the law says “common law marriage” constitute a marriage?
Does just saying your married make you married?
People trying to redefine definition of marriage
Same-sex, open, polygamy are these acceptable definitions of marriage?
People do not believe in the sanctity of marriage
Many people chose to “try it out,” before they marry, play married without being married.
Many chose just to live together, no reason to get married.
Question: Could you add to the list, why are marriages struggling today?
Henry Mencken said “Marriage is a wonderful institution. But who would want to live in an institution?
(Transition) I think when what constitutes and what defines a marriage and the purpose of marriage changes it directly will impact the family, the home, and this series is about Christian Home Essentials. Let me press on some more on this. with marriages struggling then families struggle.
I think we can also agree that in this society that the family is struggling too. Before I go further, let me ask a question.
Question: Do you think that families are struggling today? What do you think the cause(s) are/maybe?
(Struggling Family Picture Inserted Here)
I think we can say:
Stress, anxiety in the marriage brings struggles into the family.
Parents are at odd’s with children; children at odd’s with the parents too
Structure within the family unit is blurred
Even the family unit itself is blurred because of
Absentee fathers
redefined parenthood (man/man, etc.)
Does anyone want to add to this list?
(Transition) So struggling marriage will directly impact the family and create potential struggling family, but when we look a little more, a little deeper we may see another underline, under the surface sometimes issue, selfishness.
(Selfish picture inserted here)
Another word for selfish is self centeredness aka the “it’s all about me” complex. That is a marriage killer and a family destroyer.
Question: When you think of selfishness in marriage or in family what comes to mind?
(transition) All this as an introduction into our series on Christian Home Essentials, as we develop and discuss this series together we will take considerable time in the series to look at the words of Jesus and the apostles for some good godly input for application to our Christian Homes. Tonight we start with the sanctity of marriage.
So, tonight after this brief introduction and discussion may we look at.
Sanctity of marriage defined
Sanctity of marriage delineated
A look at 10 suggestions for a successful marriage.
Sanctity of marriage defined
Sanctity of marriage defined
Sanctity, you I’m pretty sure have heard the term sanctity of life, but we are talking about marriage, the sanctity of marriage.
Question: What do you think the word sanctity means?
Sanctity defined: Quality of being holy, sacred, ultimate importance and inviolability
Quality of being holy (Lev11:44, 20:7-8)
Commonly used in Holy Matrimony, why? Because of the sanctity of marriage.
Let me give you the bible references just mentioned.
44 For I am the Lord your God: ye shall therefore sanctify yourselves, and ye shall be holy; for I am holy: neither shall ye defile yourselves with any manner of creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.
To get the effect of the word, best to look at the KJV let me give you the other too
7 Sanctify yourselves therefore, and be ye holy: for I am the Lord your God. 8 And ye shall keep my statutes, and do them: I am the Lord which sanctify you.
Question: What is another word for “sanctify?” (hint look at your bible at one of the passages)?
Answer: consecrate
(Transition) from the sanctity, or consecration of marriage to the sacredness of marriage
Question: what do you believe the word sacred means?
Sacred defined (adj) connected to God (or the gods); dedicated to a religious purpose; religious rather than secular; embodying the laws or doctrine of a religion.
Sacredness of marriage
Holy, consecrated, dedicated
Embodiment, purposed.
Marriage is one of the most holy things we can do, can have. God created it! Marriage is not to be taken lightly but to be considered sanctified, to be sacred, to be holy.
Question: so putting things together, what does sanctity and sacredness look like in a marriage?
(Transition): So the idea of marriage being sanctified and sacred, now may we look what Jesus and the apostles had to say about marriage.
Sanctity of marriage delineated
Sanctity of marriage delineated
Marriage is holy, sacred and is of ultimate importance when it comes to the family, so now what does scripture have to say about the sanctity of marriage.
Question: What does delineate mean? Can you give an example?
Delineate: to describe or portray something precisely
Established by God (Mt19:4-6; Gen2:18-24)
From the beginning, God made them, male/female, made them to be joined as one flesh (Mt19:4-6)
Now speaking of the sanctity and the sacredness of marriage look what it says in (Mt19:6)
6 “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”
What God has joined, let no man separate (Mt19:6)
Now look what God had to say in the beginning.
18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” 19 Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the sky, and brought them to the man to see what he would call them; and whatever the man called a living creature, that was its name.
20 The man gave names to all the cattle, and to the birds of the sky, and to every beast of the field, but for Adam there was not found a helper suitable for him. 21 So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh at that place.
22 The Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. 23 The man said, “This is now bone of my bones, And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.”
24 For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.
It is not good for man to be alone (Gen2:18)
God brought her (woman) to man (Gen2:22)
So that they would be joined, and become one flesh (Gen2:24)
(Transition) Marriage is not a creation of the state, but by God Himself, so marriage is Holy, sacred and sanctified!
Marriage is regulated by Jesus (Mt28:18; 2Cor5:10; Mt19:7-9; Mt5:31-32)
Jesus was given all authority . . . (Mt28:18)
with all authority and if marriage was established by God himself then that means that Jesus is the authority over marriage.
10 For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may be recompensed for his deeds in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad.
One day we will appear before Christ, to be recompensed for our deeds, be them good or bad. (2Cor5:10)
So do you think this would cover how we are in marriage? Do don’t do lightly, what God takes seriously
7 They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give her a certificate of divorce and send her away?” 8 He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses permitted you to divorce your wives; but from the beginning it has not been this way.
9 “And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”
Question: Why did Moses allow divorce (look at Mt19:8)?
In (v.9) we see it is allowed for immorality, infidelity, so for adultery
Some may become eunuchs (become, remain celibate) for the sake of the kingdom (Mt19:11-12)
11 But He said to them, “Not all men can accept this statement, but only those to whom it has been given. 12 “For there are eunuchs who were born that way from their mother’s womb; and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men; and there are also eunuchs who made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. He who is able to accept this, let him accept it.”
(Illustration) - use Lloyd from Lockett
Paul gives much in regards to marriage (1Cor7:2-5, 10-16, as well as Rom7:1-4)
2 But because of immoralities, each man is to have his own wife, and each woman is to have her own husband. 3 The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband.
Each is to have his own wife, own husband (1Cor7:2-3)
So the marriage is to be sacred, sanctified, holy, set apart, not to be shared with others, one husband, one wife, one male, one female, but lets read on
4 The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.
5 Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
Physical relations, intimate relations are not to be withheld except by agreement for a time and a purpose (1Cor7:4-5)
Question: What are reasons to withhold intimate relations according to (1Cor7:4-5)?
(Transition): Jesus is the judge, the arbitrator regarding marriage. Now I mentioned intimacy and may we expand on that a little more now
Marriage is reserved for intimacy (Heb13:4; 1Cor6:9-10, 16
The only acceptable, proper place for sexual, intimate relations is in the confines of marriage
4 Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge.
Marriage bed is to be undefiled (Heb13:4)
Expand on that, remember God is the judge and He is righteous and will judge in righteousness
So only after marriage is the acceptable time for intimate relations for anything out of that is consider fornication.
9 Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals, 10 nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God.
Question: According to 1Cor6:9-10 can fornicators enter into the kingdom of God?
there is no such thing as a “one night stand” or “hook up’s” when it comes to God and His righteousness, for according to 1Cor6:16 when you have intimate relations with someone you become one flesh.
A survey by Heritage foundation found
25.3% of sexually active teenage girls experienced depression; compared to 7.7% of abstinent girls
14.3% of sexually active girls attempted suicide; compared to 5.1% of virgin peers
This was taking from article there is nothing brief about a hook up, 2003
20% divorce rate for those who wait for intimate relations until marriage
40% of those who do not (National Survey of family Growth)
Increasing the odds of a successful marriage requires mutual respect and trust.
Courtship is a time to get to know one another, to build trust with one another and to learn and earn respect for one another.
(Transition): The sanctity of marriage is protected and preserved when it alone is the realm for sexual intimacy.
(Marriage-1 picture inserted here)
Drawing a conclusion about the Christian home essential of marriage.
Marriage is not an institution of the state, it is a creation of God.
Marriage and its definition are defined by God and not the whims of social change.
Marriage instructions, essentials are located in the bible and when applied and help to make a strong Christian home.
(Transition) - a family court judge Joseph Sabbath who has over 20 years experience in handling divorces offers up some items to help have a successful marriage, to not be a part of that growing % of divorces.
Bear and forbear
Work together, play and grow together
Avoid the little quarrels, and the big ones will take care of themselves.
Compromise (give and take). It is the antitoxin of divorce.
Practice sympathy, good humor and mutual understanding.
Don’t grouch before breakfast, or after it either.
Respect your’in laws,” but don’t criticize them or take criticism from them.
Establish your own home, even in a one room flat.
Fight for each other, but not with each other.
Build your home on religious faith, with love and forgiveness as the watchword.
(Transition) A Christian home starts with a Christian marriage, a Christian marriage starts with being a Christian.
(Invitation slide) invitation, want a God centered Christian marriage, start with God and lord and Savior of your life first (expand)
(Song slide) (prayer slide) (Exit slides)