Eye For An Eye?

I’ve been wronged

have you ever witnessed road rage? or perhaps partaken of a little bit of road rage yourself?

How does it go.... usually one person does something that irritates another person on the road and then that other person does something in retaliation.

I watched a clip of some road rage on youtube the other day and I honestly have to admit, I found it quite funny to watch.

There’s an SUV and a car and the SUV needs to change lanes, so he signals and waits for a space. But the guy in the car next to him doesn’t want to let him in so he crowds the guy in front so that the SUV needing to merge can’t do it.

Eventually SUV needing to change lanes runs out of space and has to go around the car in front, out into on coming traffic to get into the lane

In the video there’s these little pop ups that describe what’s going on. Just before the SUV goes around to get into the lane ahead there’s a pop up that explains to us that the guy who was in the car not letting the SUV into the lane, had his windows open… cut to next scene.

After the guy in the suv finally gets into the lane, and we think it’s all said and done. But then, the SUV pulls onto the side of the road and waits for the other guy in the car to catch up to him. When they’re side by side the SUV accelerates through a huge puddle on the side of the road and a wall of water gets splashed through the window of the guy who wouldn’t let the SUV merge

Text book road rage.

So what does the bible have to say about this? Well I suppose it depends on where in the bible we read. If you read the Old Testament in Leviticus 24:17 you would read about the eye for an eye law. It says...

Leviticus 24:17–21 ESV

17 “Whoever takes a human life shall surely be put to death. 18 Whoever takes an animal’s life shall make it good, life for life. 19 If anyone injures his neighbor, as he has done it shall be done to him, 20 fracture for fracture, eye for eye, tooth for tooth; whatever injury he has given a person shall be given to him. 21 Whoever kills an animal shall make it good, and whoever kills a person shall be put to death.

But! If you read Matthew 18:15-17 you find something entirely different

Matthew 18:15–17 ESV

15 “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. 16 But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.

Today we’re talking about what we should do when someone wrongs us, or sins against us. How do we deal with it? How do you reconcile with them and why is it important to do so?

Let’s start with what we should do.

According to Jesus in Matthew 18, we should go and talk to them. V.15 says that we should go and… “tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.”

There’s a theme that comes with brotherhood, with family… that’s unity, togetherness. Something that is of the utmost importance in our Christian community is unity and gaining a brother or keeping a brother is all part of that.

What happens when you are upset with someone because they did something that hurt you but they have no idea they did it…Now this person can tell that you’re upset with them but you don’t say anything?

100% of the time, there is conflict and hard feelings that result from not speaking about what they did that hurt us, that never had to be there if we had just told the person who hurt us what they did.

I don’t know about you, but one thing I’ve learned is that this concept, telling others when they’ve hurt us, it makes a world of a difference. Now, instead of two individuals against each other… it’s two individuals working together to resolve an issue.

In a Jesus paraphrase, we should tell someone when they hurt or wrong us, if they hear what we have to say then our relationship with that person will prosper and be better off than it was before the incident.

Oh… but what if telling them makes it worse? well, lets read on...

Matthew 18:16–17 ESV

16 But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.

In the law of moses, there were to be two or three witnesses for any charge against someone to be held as valid.

The idea being that if there had to be two or three witnesses there is now a need for accountability within the church. Which is also why it’s important for there to be unity within body of Christ. If we don’t stand in unity together, then why would we hold each other accountable to be the people that we want to be and whom God wants us to be?

Not only does Jesus outline how we should seek accountability and unity within our church family with this passage, He also shows us how to be grace giving people.

He says to not only go and talk with the offending part once, but once alone, once with others, and once with the community. He’s demonstrating that all possible effort should be made to restore relationship with this person. It’s not until all options are exhausted that He says to let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.

As a body of believers it is so important that we stand together in unity. Not only in support for each other and the issues we are dealing with but also that we might have strength and support to stand as a light in our community.

Right now we are in a very interesting time where churches everywhere are discerning what the wisest course of action is in regards to covid-19. Something that we must remember as a church family is that we stand together, regardless of how we do church on a Sunday morning. No matter what we feel about how things are we must stick together, loving each other, being there to support each other in times of trouble and in need… even when one of us offends or wrongs another… and then being united is even more important so that we can work through the struggle and the conflict and come out on the other side still loving and caring for each other.

I want to challenge all of us today, If you have been hurt by someone… seek them out, let them know that they hurt you. But do it in grace! Don’t go and ream them out because then the hurt will only continue. Grace filled, love and patience is what is needed to resolve hurt in our lives.

Don’t let the enemy keep you silent out of a feeling of self pity or fear or even a desire to be angry at the person who has hurt you. Ask the Lord to give you the strength you need to give the kind of grace that he has given to you, the love that He has given to you, and the endless patience He has given to you.

It’s not easy to take this approach to reconciliation but, I promise you this, it is the best way and it is the best way because it is God’s way.