Frienship Sunday Preparation

Friendship 101 by Steve Shepherd

Matthew 7:7-7:8

INTRO.- Math 101, English 101, Speech 101, History 101, etc.. You name it and it’s out there. But what we are talking about?

101 is a term when referring to an introductory course of some subject or the basic knowledge of some subject.

Here is an example of what I would call Atheism 101.

ILL.- A young woman teacher with obvious liberal tendencies explained to her class of small children that she was an atheist. She asked her class if they were atheists too. Not really knowing what atheism was but wanting to be like their teacher, their hands exploded into the air.

There was, however, one exception. A beautiful girl named Lucy who did not go along with the crowd. The teacher asked her why she decided to be different. "Because I’m not an atheist."

The teacher asked her, "Well, what are you?" She said, "I’m a Christian."

The teacher was a bit perturbed and asked why Lucy why she was a Christian. "Well, I was brought up knowing and loving Jesus. My mom is a Christian, and my dad is a Christian, so I am a Christian."

The teacher started to get angry. She said, “That’s no reason to be a Christian. What if your mom was a moron, and your dad was a moron. What would you be then?" She paused, and smiled. "Then," said Lucy, "I’d be an atheist."

Atheism 101. Atheism makes no sense whatsoever. The starry universe, plant and animal life, the human body, a newborn baby, all these and more shout loudly and clearly THERE IS AN ALL-WISE CREATOR CALLED GOD!

Romans 1:19 “What may be known about God is PLAIN to them (or should be), because God made it plain to them.”

You can get much plainer than all of creation! Atheism. It’s nonsense.

We all need an education in life. We don’t need to know about everything, but we need to know about some things.

ILL.- I couldn’t build a doghouse if my life depended on it. Fortunately, it doesn’t matter. I don’t have a dog and don’t plan to buy a dog, but I have nothing against dogs. I can, however, build a decent sermon that is helpful to people. And that’s what is important to me.

We all need to learn things are important in life, things that bless people, because this is why God put us here: to love one another, to help one another, to build up one another.

John 13:34 “"A new command I give you: Love one another…”

Gal. 5:13 “Serve one another in love…”

Gal. 6:2 “Bear one another’s burdens…”

ILL.- Someone said, “When people are serving others, life is no longer meaningless.” Serving people gives meaning to life.

Sounds just like Jesus who came to seek and to save the lost. His life was far from meaningless. He lived for people and so must we.

This is what FRIEND DAY in our church is all about: seeking people and pointing them to Christ who can save them from their sins.

PROP.- I want us to consider what I call Friendship 101: basic planning for our Friend Day and future friendship with others.
1- We must pray and believe
2- We must find and bring
3- We must befriend and listen

I. WE MUST PRAY AND BELIEVE

ILL.- A man was going out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door, shaking hands. He grabbed the man by the hand and pulled him aside and said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!"

The man replied, "I’m already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor." The Pastor questioned him, saying, "How come I don’t see you except at Christmas and Easter?" He whispered back, "I’m in the secret service."

Are you trustworthy? Are you dependable? Are you a faithful friend? Some people just cannot be depended on. They can’t be depended on to come to church, to get to work on time, to do a job, to be a friend, etc.

ILL.- On April 15, 1998 I had my right hip replaced at the St. Francis Hospital in Cape Girardeau, MO. Elaine and I were not married at that time, but I expected her to be there and I expected my son Shane to be there. And they were there for my surgery and following. But I did not expect to see a running friend named Joe Beussink. Joe knew I was going to have surgery but I never asked him to come. However, he took off work and showed up anyway. When I woke, there was Joe. AND JOE HAS ALWAYS BEEN THERE FOR ME. He could be classified as a faithful friend.

Does God classify you as a faithful friend? To Him and others?

II Tim. 2:13 “If we are faithless, He will remain faithful…”

What’s this verse talking about? If we Christians are faithless in certain ways or at certain times, we must remember that God is always faithful! Even if we fail, He doesn’t. Even when we are not faithful, HE IS! Even if we don’t show up, HE WILL! Even if we don’t pray, HE IS STILL LISTENING!

ILL.- A poor woman, in an Eastern city, complained to the Sultan that while she slept her money was taken by thieves. “Why did you sleep?” asked the Sultan. “My Lord,” she said, “I slept because I thought you were ever awake.”

GOD IS FAITHFUL. Our Lord God can be trusted. Always. Therefore, we must pray and believe, knowing He will answer.

Matthew 7:7-8 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.”

James 1:5-6 “If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.”

These two scriptures are clear: We can ask God and He will answer, but we must believe Him, we must trust Him!

ILL.- A 5th grade Sunday School class was asked to go home and that night go out in their back yards and count the stars in the sky as part of their next S.S. lesson. They came back with various numbers. Some said 100, some said 1000, some said a million. Finally the teacher asked a little boy who had said nothing, "How many stars did you count?" He replied, "3". The teacher asked how did you only see 3? He said, "I guess we just have a small backyard."

We need a bigger backyard, a much bigger faith. We need to believe in our big God and trust Him to answer our prayers, especially when we are praying about something that will bring honor and glory to Him!

We need to be praying that the people we invite to our Friend Day will come and they will respond in a positive manner. We must pray and believe that God will touch their hearts and OURS!

II. WE MUST FIND AND BRING

ILL.- One preacher said to another, “I think a preacher needs to study hard for his Sunday morning message.” The second preacher said, “I disagree. Many times I have no idea what I am going to preach about but I go ahead and preach away and think nothing of it.”

The first preacher said, “You are quite right in thinking nothing of it. I talked to your deacons and they think the same thing of your sermons.”

Brothers and sisters, what will it take to get people in the church? Stirring sermons? Not necessarily. Good preaching won’t hurt, but it’s not a “cure all.”

I think that everything we do in the church should be done the best we can. I don’t think we have to be perfectionists, but we need to do a good job at whatever we do: preaching, teaching, singing, song service, greeting, etc. Doing a good job or the best job we can, will help to draw people to the church.

Of course, if people don’t know about anything about the church then how are people going to be drawn to the church?

ILL.- The Southeast Christian Church of Louisville, KY, has no trouble getting new people. Of course, the city of Louisville is now about 700,000 people. And the Southeast Church is running around 18,000 every weekend in four main services: one on Saturday night, two on Sunday morning and one on Sunday night. Last Easter they had a record attendance of 29,424.

They have more programs going on than some towns offer. They have no problem getting new people to come to their church.

They have visitors by the hundreds and perhaps thousands. BUT WHAT ABOUT US? How are we going to get new people into our church?

John 1:40-42 “Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother, was one of the two who heard what John had said and who had followed Jesus. The first thing Andrew did was to find his brother Simon and tell him, ‘We have found the Messiah’ (that is, the Christ). And he brought him to Jesus.”

Andrew found his brother Simon and brought him to Jesus. We, too, must find people and bring them to church! It’s really that simple.

Where are we going to find these people? Look around. People are everywhere. Every person has contact with far more people than they realize. Just think: family members, friends that you socialize with, fellow workers, neighbors, delivery people, mail carrier, garbage collector, cashiers, sales people, people in the bank, people at Wal-mart, etc.

I don’t think the hard part is finding the people. The hard part is having enough enthusiasm to ask people to come to church!

Andrew said to Simon, “WE HAVE FOUND THE MESSIAH!” I think he was excited about his find and excited about sharing it with his brother.

ILL.- Let’s look at this way. I am now driving a 2001 Toyota Avalon. It’s used but it’s also the best car I’ve ever driven. Do you know why I’m driving it? It’s because Jim Reed is a good salesman. After moving here, I rode one day in Jim’s 2000 Avalon and jokingly, he said, “You’ll go home and throw rocks at your Ford Taurus now.”

I now know why he said those words. He was joking, but I have discovered the Avalon to be the smoothest, quietest, slickest-running car I’ve ever driven. Jim Reed sold me on the idea and Paul McKnight literally sold me the car.

If you’re sold on something, YOU WILL SELL IT TO OTHERS! And to me, that’s the hardest part of getting people to come to church. If you are not bringing people to church then you must not be sold or sold strongly enough!

And frankly, I don’t know how anyone could not be sold on Jesus! If we believe with all our hearts that He is the Savior and there is an eternal heaven to be gained, THEN WHY ARE WE NOT TALKING UP THE CHURCH? We need to find people and bring them to church and to Jesus.

III. WE MUST BEFRIEND AND LISTEN

Proverbs 18:24 KJV “A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly…”

ILL.- The afternoon tea had been very pleasant. The hostess made the rounds, checking on the needs of her guests. She said to one lady, “Are you enjoying yourself?” “Yes,” replied the lady, “BUT THAT’S ALL I’M ENJOYING.”

How do we befriend people? One sure way NOT to befriend people is by being self-centered. People who are all wrapped up in themselves will not win friends and influence people.

ILL.- Dale Carnegie, “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in people, than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.”

Overcoming self to the point where we show interest in others is a hard thing to do. Self is a big hurdle to overcome. It takes much prayer, concentration and effort. If you don’t work at anything, it won’t happen. This holds true for overcoming selfishness as well.

Here is how NOT to befriend people. Don’t smile. Don’t listen to people. Don’t act interested in people. Don’t look at people. Think of yourself only.

ILL.- A man told me many years ago that he had his own son-in-law in Boy Scouts when he was just a youngster. The boy was always causing trouble, didn’t get along with the other boys and he couldn’t seem to do much with the boy. Finally, he decided to go talk to the boy’s mother. While talking to her, he said, “Johnny is hard to control and he acts like he is better than other boys.” His mother replied, “HE IS BETTER THAN OTHER BOYS!”

Another sure way of NOT befriending people is acting like you are better than other people.

ILL.- My father did not go to church when I was a child. One reason may have just been an excuse, but he used to say that many church people would speak to you in church, but they would “high-hat” you outside the church. What did he mean? He meant they wouldn’t speak to him outside the church. They would give him the “cold-shoulder.”

That’s a sure way NOT to draw people to Christ and the church.

How do we befriend people? Be holy but don’t overdo the acting part. Be yourself but not your bad self. Get out of yourself and into others. Listen. Speak kind words.

Prov. 12:25 “An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up.”

Prov. 15:23 “A man finds joy in giving an apt reply- and how good is a timely word!”

People in our world are hungry. They are hungry for attention, affection and love. They are hungry for people to show genuine care for them and this is a must for us, if the church is to grow.

ILL.- Henri Nouwen, the great spiritual writer was going to a monastery for a retreat. The monks observed vows of silence and the retreat was to be meditative and prayerful. Nouwen was delayed and was late getting to the monastery on that miserable, rainy night. He rang the bell, well after bedtime, and was met at the door by one of the brothers. The brother warmly greeted him, took his wet coat, brought him to the kitchen and made him a cup of tea. They chatted in the late night hours and Nouwen began to relax and feel ready for the retreat. But he knew this monk was supposed to observe silence, so he finally asked him, "Why are you willing to sit and talk with me?" The monk replied "Of all the duties of the Christian faith and the rules of my order, none is higher than hospitality."

III John 8 “We ought therefore to show hospitality to such men (to all men) so that we may work together for the truth.” Being truly hospitable to others by befriending them is a key to church growth and our Friend Day.

CONCLUSION------------------------------------------------

Our “Friend Day” will be next Sunday. We must do whatever we can to reach out to people for Christ and His church.
1- We must pray and believe
2- We must find and bring
3- We must befriend and listen

Rom. 10:1 “My heart’s desire and prayer to God for them is that they may be saved.” What’s your desire in life? Don’t be too quick to answer that question.

ILL.- Robert Woodruff, who was the President of Coca Cola, from 1923 to 1955, a 32-year span, cast the following vision for Coca Cola. Right after World War II, he said, "In my lifetime I want everyone in the world to have tasted Coke."

Brothers and sisters, It should be our ultimate desire in life for everyone to know and taste Christ. Please make that your desire, your goal in life as a follower of Christ.