Community - We are in this together, right?

We are all in this together. Right?

I believe your answer to that question can make a significant difference to your future.

I believe our answer to that question can make a significant difference to the future of the Celebrate Recovery Ministry.

Keep that thought as we start tonight’s lesson.... It is not a lesson that includes an acrostic. It is not a lesson that is (on it’s own) a part of the CR lesson series.

It is, however, a lesson that plays an integral role in our recovery. And specifically Celebrate Recovery

So, When I think about being all in this together, I think about the importance of community.

Community

I wanted to start us off this week by taking a look at the importance of community in our lives.

We have to face the elephant in the room. We must recognize that “community” has been a little hard to manage these last several months. It seems difficult to stress the importance of community if we are told we cannot gather together.

It requires us to investigate our definition of community. Specifically, we are going to look at community as it relates to the gathering.

Consider.....

Celebrate Recovery Purpose

What is this “Gathering” called Celebrate Recovery all about.

We come together every Friday (unless the campus is closed!) - that’s a gathering

We meet other nights for 12-step studies - that’s a gathering

We meet periodically with someone else for accountability and guidance. - that’s a gathering

Let’s look closer...

Common Interest Gathering:

Ever been to a concert or a sporting event or even a band concert at your kids’ school. A group of people join together for a unique overall purpose. Everyone at the sporting event has something in common…they have a common interest. You don’t go to a football game to watch tennis. You don’t go to see the Rochester Philharmonic and hear Pearl Jam. Ok, and can we all admit…you don’t go to your kids’ band concert to hear the Philharmonic…you go because you are supporting your kids. Right? Each of these larger gatherings is a “community” of unrelated individuals who come together with a common interest . It is a type of gathering…we might call our Friday night time together as this type of gathering. people with a common interest coming together ....although we don’t necessarily know each other.

Special Event Gathering:

Special events are things like birthday parties, weddings, a family reunion, maybe a staff meeting at work. For the sake of my presentation tonight, I see these as gatherings of individuals who come together with a common interest (like the other gathering), but they are also individuals who have relationship with one another. Whether at work or at a family gathering. …it is more than the “gathering” taking place here, it is the relationship building that separates it. I imagine the CR 12-step night as one of these types of gatherings . You may not know everyone the first night, but pretty quickly you do get to know each other well....relationships are formed. It is a type of gathering.

One-to-One Gathering:

Finally, we have the one-to-one gathering. This is where two people meet for a specific purpose.

It meets all the other meeting criteria:

Common Interest

Relationships

but it adds an intimacy … Not in a romantic sense, but in a vulnerability sense.

One-to-one meetings open the door to conversations that you might not have in a group setting.

What about at work? If you are scheduled for a one-to-one meeting with your boss, usually your boss wants to share something “good or bad” that you, and you alone, need to her.

What about in the family? If I take one of my kids for coffee, I open the door to a closer conversation than if my whole family is with me.

What about CR. Our one-to-one gatherings are the times you spend with you accountability partner or your sponsor.

The Purpose of Celebrate Recovery Gatherings

The Large Group

The large group- This is an opportunity to fellowship together, worship with one another, and to dig deeper into your own recovery through the things you learn through the lessons and the testimonies. And then to meet some new people who will help you see you are not alone, as we begin to share in our open share groups.

Hebrews 10:23–25 ESV

Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.

When the author wrote this there were groups who had “neglected” meeting together. Paul is telling them the meeting is important.... gather again! Not just because he is telling them to, but because it is an encouragement to everyone. Because it eases the pain of our hurts, habits and hangups. When we are gathered together with a common interest healing, we can help one, spur each other on, and soften our own hearts in the process. Meeting together on Friday nights is important to your recovery.

It doesn’t take the place of any of the other types of CR gatherings, rather it only enhances them and helps you see. A very wise young girl in my Student ministry small group said this week: “What we put our eyes on is what we see”. Friday nights focus our attention on “recovery”…..

No longer do we camp in the hur or the habit or the hangup. Rather we choose to “camp” at CR on a Friday night and collect the tools we need to move ahead.

The 12-Step Gathering

The 12-step gathering is an opportunity for us to take those tools we are learning and put them into practice in our life as we work our way through the 12-step books alongside a small group of individuals with a common interest and relationship. the 12-step opens the door to real and honest relationships. You gather and work through the pain together. You get to know one another quickly. It is truly my favorite part of CR. All the sudden the shame you felt because you “were the only one” is lifted. You have a true small group of dependable, friends (who we call family) to enter into recovery with. When the going gets tough, you do it together.

Listen to

Ecclesiastes 4:9–12 ESV

Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

Recovery done alone is recovery done in secret. Where do secrets get us? Secrets take us to places like shame and guilt and anger and resentment and fear......

Recovery done alongside others on the same journey is recovery done with an openness toward healing—it is done with a purpose (dependant on the love and grace and truth you receive from those in your group). It is a mutual relationship....with mutual benefits. It is a relationship that considers the hurt, habit or hangup of not only me....but of others.

We help one another. Where does this help…this love and grace and truth with and from others get us? ----to new life.

The Sponsor or Accountability Partner

Time spent in this third gathering, the one-to-one time with a sponsor or accountability partner allows you to be transparent and vulnerable in a way you may never have experienced before. We are taught that success is self promotion.

What have I accomplished? What do others think of me? How important am I?

Where does this type of success get us? Alone and deeper into our fears and pain.

The one who finds success in popular opinion will forever try to climb the ladder of approval and never be enough

The one who finds success in financial gain will never be satisfied with what they have

The one who finds success in their accomplishments will be exhausted and never be able to catch up with their own expectations.

True success (proven time and time and time again)is found in admitting our own shortcomings and crawling out from under the pressure of striving.

James 5:16 ESV

Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.

Your accountability partner or sponsor cannot “fix” you, but they provide you with an intimate, one-to-one relationship that is very rare today. They are relatable, reliable and required for the healthiest recovery journey. Recovery requires courage. Courage walks hand-in-hand with vulnerability. Your one-to-one relationship makes vulnerability easier and recovery possible.

Let’s go back to the beginning:

We are all in this together. Right?

Yes we must be.

Many have found creative ways to meet:

in the common interest gatherings through podcasts and webinars.

In the relational gatherings through Zoom small groups and when allowed through face-to-face small groups maintaining their 6ft distance.

and the more intimate conversations through phone calls and text (yes even text) and parking lot meeting.

WE ARE in this together - even when we couldn’t meet on site.

But as Paul taught us....we can meet on site…so let’s not neglect meeting together - If you can’t be on site…look to other ways to meet.

Yes, we are all i this togetHer, but maybe we rephrase it to say, rather

“WE ARE BETTER TOGETHER”

So, what’s in store for the next several weeks?

We begin together. Next week we will hear from a leader from the CR Summit—a gathering of leaders from across the world who recognize the importance of this community called Celebrate Recovery

And then the following Friday, August 7th, we begin together with a fun topic: DENIAL

Serenity Prayer