Are you helping or judging?

Matthew 7:1-6 - The Greatest Sermon: Are you helping or judging? Doug Partin - The Christian Church - August 16, 2020 "And He said unto them, 'Bad Dogs, No, no!'" The caption under the Far-side cartoon featuring a speckled dog pounding on a pulpit was, "Hellfire and Dalmatians." It was on my favorite T-shirt, which I wore out. Gary Larson's wit has always amused me, especially when it gets uncomfortably close to an inconvenient truth. And the truth he was poking fun at in that cartoon is how Christians in our current culture are not known for their love, but for their judgmental and intolerant attitudes. Something in us wants to hold up the standard of how God has called us, His children, to live, and compare it to how the world chooses to live. But we seem to delight not is showing that God's way is a better choice, but to indicate that those in the world are a miserable, sorry lot. That they're "bad dogs." Rather than recognizing them as God's lost sheep wandered away and in trouble; or a wayward son, now desperate, looking to return in hopes of being received as a servant by those he had hurt. We insist on seeing bad dogs, even though Jesus told us to do otherwise. We see failures who deserve to lay in the bed they have made for themselves. "That'll teach them, right?" Well; Yes, it will. But it will teach them that we have no compassion, no mercy, for those who needed it most. It was the Good Samaritan who bound the wounds of the man who was left for dead by robbers on his way to Jericho; and it was the patient Father who ran to embrace his son after he had been used up by the world. And it was Jesus who protected the woman caught in adultery. It was Toni Compolo, a once rather famous evangelical speaker and the author of many good resources on reaching out to those who do not call Jesus their Lord, who told of a time when he was asked to speak at a leadership conference. He arrived late the night before, and couldn't sleep so he went down to a local coffee shop, which was in every way, a "greasy spoon." He got a donut and a cup of coffee. And much to his surprise, and discomfort, eight or nine provocative and boisterous prostitutes came in and ended up sitting on either side of him. It was a small place. He overheard one of the women say that the next day was her birthday. Her friend responded by saying, "So, what do you want from me? A birthday party? Ya want me to get you a cake and sing 'Happy Birthday? Is that what you want?" She retorted, "Come on. Why do you have to be so mean? I was just telling you. Why should you give me a birthday party? I've never had a birthday party my whole life? Why should I have one now?" They bantered for a bit, then went on their way into the night. After they left, Tony asked the man behind the counter, "Do they come in here every night?" "Most of them do, yeah. Why do you want to know?" "Because I have this great idea. One of them said her birthday is tomorrow, and I want you to make her a cake, and surprise her with it." He wouldn't take Tony's money, the cake would be on the house. The next night, after the conference, Tony showed up at the greasy spoon with crepe paper, some decorations, and a sign that read, "Happy Birthday." The word must have spread, because it seemed like every hooker in the area showed up early to wish "Agnes," that was the woman's name. happy birthday. When she showed up, she couldn't believe it. Her eyes moistened, and when the birthday cake was brought out from the back, she lost it, openly crying. She asked Harry, the cook, if they had to cut it and eat it right then. He said, "No. You can do whatever you want with it." She asked if she could take it home. "Sure." She said, "I want to show it to my mother." And off she went, carrying it like it was the holy grail. Tony broke the silence among those left behind by asking that motley crew to join him in a prayer for Agnes. Afterwards, Harry said, "Hey, you never said that you were a preacher. What kind of church do you belong to?" And Tony said, "The kind that throws birthday parties for prostitutes." And Harry said, "That kind of church doesn't really exist, if it did, I'd go to it." Instead of throwing birthday parties, we usually belittle bad dogs with a reminder of their failures with some form of a joke, some terse opinion, some divisive political talking point, or some spiteful Facebook banter. We, who represent the church, in doing so, affirm that we are judgmental. That we are more likely to call people names, label them as an evil, and by our words and behavior, hurt them; instead of helping them in any way. We must remember that Jesus was preaching to a rather diverse group of people who had crowded around Him on the mount. But they had one thing in common, they were all Jewish. All of them, in one way or another, were connected to God and His ways. They were all God's people. Some among them were certain to be Pharisees, leaders of the most dominant sect among God's people at that time. They were notorious for hypocritical and judgmental behavior. Jesus often spoke directly to them, condemning them for it; but on this occasion, He was not speaking only to them, but to each of those who had gathered around. So, we can surmise that He is also speaking to each of us as well, and not just those among us who are well known for being judgmental legalists. You may well believe that you are truly "helping" a person who is struggling with an issue in their life; who is making less than good choices; who has no real idea that there is a "God's way" which would be a better way. They are just doing what they can to make their admittedly miserable life a little bit better. And who can blame them for wanting something better? Instead of helping them, you might be, although it is not your intention, judging them. In this portion of the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus presented a process through which His followers could keep their criticisms positive and helpful, rather than hurtful and destructive. In order to follow His directions, we must first understand what it is that we are to avoid, and embrace what we are to employ. Let's begin with taking a look at judgement. The term Jesus used, 'krino', that is commonly translated into English as 'judgement' was a word that simply meant to 'make a decision.' We make decisions about people, places, things and ideas all the time. We can't help but do so. We all make 'judgments' because that it is how we understand and make sense of the world around us. So, it is vital that we use a fair and proper measure by which we make those decisions. Otherwise, the decisions we make, especially in regard to people, might be considered by them as "judgmental" (in the current usage of the word). Which is to tell a person that they are bad because they are making choices for themselves that are different than we would make, or that God would encourage them to make. Not being judgmental, by this definition, seems impossible, unless you just don't say anything at all. And there are times when that is good advice; but we are called to proclaim the gospel. The Good News that "God so loves the world that He sent His one and only son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. For God did not send the Son into the world to judge the world, but that the world might be saved through Him." Of course, Jesus went on to tell Nicodemus, "He who believes in Him will not be judged; he who does not believe has been judged already, because he has not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God. This is the judgement, Jesus said, that the Light has come into the world, and men loved the darkness rather than the Light, for their deeds were evil. For everyone who does evil hates the Light, and does not come into the Light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. But he who practices the truth comes to the Light, so that his deeds may be seen as having been done before God." (John 3:16:21). In other words, "It is God's place to judge, the Son's place to save, and our place (as ones who have been saved) to extend Jesus' offer of forgiveness while we strive to put His word into practice in our own life. But let's get back to the sermon on the mount. Frist of all, Jesus said that we need to understand a bit of godly wisdom, "What goes around, comes around." If you are critical in a negative way about the people around you, they will treat you the same way. If you go around pointing out other people's faults, they will be quick to point out your faults. Like the 'golden rule," it is always a better idea to treat the people around you the same way that you would like to be treated. Even if they don't do the same. Jesus is not saying that we will not be judged by God. We all will be judged by God, and in some since, as Jesus said, we have already been judged by Him. And He would rather that we not face that judgement apart from His Son; for it is the punishment which be enacted on all who are judged from which we need to be saved. Peter said that even those who were judged by God in the days of Noah, and who drowned, while Noah and his family were saved; were given the opportunity to hear the good news from Jesus himself. Those in prison, awaiting judgement, might have a change of heart, if offered grace. Peter went on to say that we need think about our own conversion, our baptism, like having an invitation to get on the Ark, and being saved from God's punishment. (1 Peter 3:18-22) Secondly, Jesus said, we had better consider the "measure" we are using to determine whether something in another person's life needs to be addressed. We need to ask ourselves, "Is it a little thing, or something big?" What we decide will determine our approach toward them. We don't want to make a mountain out of a molehill. But if we see that their behavior is destructive, and we can't keep silent, we might decide that it is time for an act of "intervention." If someone is about to step off a cliff, we might spring into action. But it they are stepping off a curb, we might react a little differently. And when we act, regardless of whether it is little or big, it should be out of concern; and what we do, should actually help them in their current situation. I had a father once call me. He had allowed a party to be held at his house for his son and friends. There had been a lot of drinking. He wasn't calling to tell me that what he did was a bad thing. His son was locked in a room with a gun and was threatening to kill himself. He wanted to know if I could come over and help him, because he didn't want to call the police. He didn't want that sort of light revealing what was taking place. I told him to call the police, and that I would be right over. He did. They showed up. And with everyone working together, the boy put down his gun and came out. All of the friends were also given rides home, and they were all, in time, brought before the juvenile court. Most of the parents were from good families, and their children got off with little or no repercussions. But this particular father, did not spare his son the court's punishment. He himself had a fine he had he had to pay, and so did his son. That meant that the son had to get a job and the money from it wen to paying the fine. He also had to perform community service. I never once chided the Father for allowing his son throw a party, that was between him and the Lord. I did my best to support him and his family through a difficult time. The boy, when he found out, was furious with me for telling his father to "call the cops." But he was alive and well to hate me. And I was okay with that. He later, years later, realized how that event changed the course of his life. He is doing very well now, a successful professional, who is also a strong believer. The third step, Jesus said, is to apply our concern about someone not following God's ways toward ourselves first. We are supposed to love our neighbors as ourselves. And dealing with our own problem is a form of self-love. We need to care about ourselves enough to confront our own problems. It is no easy thing to do. And we often only address such things when it is brought to our attention by someone else. After we get over being angry with them for pointing out our faults, it is then that we can get to work on addressing them with God's help. We need to ask, as Jesus directed, "Do we have any glaring problems in our own lives that we need to address before "helping" someone else about a little thing in their life. This is a life long endeavor. The speck in your brother's eye, may well be a problem for him. I don't know about you, but I tend to notice when I get something in my own eye. And when I do, it gets my whole attention. Flushing it with water, adding drops. Doing whatever it takes to find relief. So, it is hard for me to imagine that I could miss a log in my own eye; if I act that way about a speck. But, like a good farside cartoon, we all understand what Jesus was trying to point out with a little bit of humor. If your own attitude about what God desires is so impaired by your own disobedience, that you no longer feel the pain of stepping away from His guidance. Then perhaps you need to get yourself back on course, before you help someone else get back on course. Otherwise it will be like the blind leading the blind. You might address the particular behavior, but you will not address the broken relationship. Our sin damages our relationship with God, as well as with others. And it is imperative that we bring our behaviors into God's light, that He might reveal the real problems we are facing, and we might with that sort of help, repent of them and be graced by God, and move forward in our life in a much better direction. And last of all, Jesus said; it is useless to project God's holy standards on those who don't want to follow God. Jesus, using humor again, speaks of "giving what is holy to dogs," and "throwing pearls before swine." People who do not have a relationship with God will not care about "His ways," even if they are better ways. They will reject the standards and attack us for trying to "force" those standards on them. They will see it as "us" trying to get "them" to do something that "they" don't want to do. It is always better to led them into a relationship with Christ first; for it is only then that they will embrace His standards and strive for the changes we were hoping all along that they might make. If God can let people choose poorly, we can too. That doesn't mean that we approve of their behavior, or that we accept that their behavior is really a good choice, or that we punish or belittle them for whatever it is they choose to do. It does mean that we show compassion to them, that we love them as God loves us. And that we share with them the truth that God really does love them, enough to send His Son to save them. And yes, they, just like each of us, need to be saved. You may have heard that Tony Compolo's son has recently, in his mid-life, turned away from his father's faith. And he claims that part of the reason he did so is because he could live in the shadow of a person who was so great in the eyes of the church, but who, was less than perfect at home, especially towards him. Which is a reminder that our first mission field is our own home. Those who know us best should be the first ones who, from us, hear the good news, and they should experience how God's love has transformed us. We should, in that sense, parent by grace, not by judgement. May our Lord bless us to be a blessing to those around us, and may we be known by our love. Yes. By our love. Prayer: Lord Jesus, Help us to make decisions about the world around us just as you do. Amen. May we see and respond to the world with God's unfailing love