Depression and the Kindness of God - 1 Kings 19:1-18

Introduction

One of the great victories of satan has been to make most off limits the areas in which we need the most help. And, he seems to have especially exploited the Church in this way, which is the saddest of ironies. We are those people on earth who have publicly acknowledged our sinfulness, our weakness, and our hopelessness, and yet churches seem to be anything but safe for those who are sinful, weak, and hopeless. We think people expect us to be perfect and that they need our strength. More truthfully, they are refreshed by the honesty of our flaws and in greater need of our weaknesses. I’ve actually found that it’s through your weaknesses that you are most able to connect with others.

And so, today, I want us to talk about a subject that satan has succeeded in making taboo in Jesus’ church — depression. And, I want us to talk about it because I know already that many of you are battling it, and you feel alone. I want us to talk about it because I’ve battled it, and I’ve felt alone. The more that I talk with you the more I realize that what I’ve felt and what you have felt are much the same; we just didn’t realize it until things got so bad that we were able to get beyond our great act of happiness to actually talk about it.

God’s Word

It’s important in a discussion as tender as this one the we acknowledge a couple of things on the front end. No two experiences of depression are the same. So, I can talk about my experience and the factors that have contributed, but I wouldn’t pretend to be an expert in your case. Further, I want to establish on the front end that depression is always because of sin in the sense that the original sin in the Garden of Eden brought the world under the curse of God and defiled that which was perfect. But, depression doesn’t equal sin. Sometimes our sin made lead to our depression, and in Job’s case or in Jesus’ case in Gethsemane, depression can even be because of God’s testing in the lives of the faithful. So, it’s important to realize that it’s because of sin — that means that Jesus is defeating it and one day there will be no more depression, but it’s not *always* the result of specific sins in your life or in your family. Lastly, and this is the thought that I hope will shape the sermon this morning, is that there was a time in which Romans 8:28 (“all things work together for the good of those who love Christ”) seemed to discourage me more than encourage me. But, I would find myself thinking: This hurts so bad, the feels so hopeless, I feel so worthless, how can anything about this bring about good? And, its this morning’s passage that came to my mind most often. So, let’s ask that question and see what Elijah learned: How can depression - or any bad - bring about good? (headline)

Depression will “receive” God’s “kindness”.

v. 4 “It is enough; now, O LORD, take away my life, for I am no better than my fathers.” The first way that I want you to see is that depression will “receive” God’s “kindness”. Perhaps, nothing feels more distant during depression than the kindness of God. In fact, thoughts or mentions of it can even make you angry. That seems to have been the case for Elijah here. Now, you have to know the backdrop of what’s happening here to understand the picture. Ahab the King of Israel had married a worshipper of Baal, Jezebel. As a result, Israel had begun to worship Baal while still going through the motions of devotion to the Lord God. God sends his prophet Elijah to confront Ahab, and they decide to settle, once and for all, which God is supreme. 850 prophets of Baal go first and attempt to pray that Baal would send fire from heaven, which should have been easy for him to do, to consume an altar. After hours of silence, Elijah prays a simple, one sentence prayer, and God sends a missile of fire from heaven to consume the altar. Afterward, all 850 false prophets are gathered and slaughtered. So, we’re talking mountaintop of mountaintops here. The highest experience with God possible, a great victory and vindication. That is, until Jezebel finds out about what’s transpired. Now, you have to understand that Jezebel was a person with tremendous power and influence, and she publicly declares that if Elijah is not dead within 24 hours, may the gods treat her worse than the prophets who were just slaughtered. So, you can imagine where Elijah is. He’s on this mountaintop. Finally, all of the grueling, terrifying ministry that God has called him to appears finished. The worship of Baal appears to have ended and the devotion to YWHW seems assured. Surely, now, he can buy himself a Winnebago and begin his retirement. And, then, when Jezebel shows up, the rug is pulled out from under his utopian dream, and he realizes that life isn’t going to suddenly become easier or better.

Depression is Chronic Pain

And suddenly, for Elijah, the thought of dying sounds more comforting than living. It’s like he’d slowly, but surely been climbing to the top of the mountain only to tumble over the side when he got there. Now, he’s had enough. I can relate to how Elijah felt. In my lowest moments, there have been times in which I have told God that if He will not make me better, make my life more joyful, let me have a break that I would just assume He take my life from me. Three years ago, I’m fairly certain that I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown, and I remember dreaming about God bringing me into eternity and the sense of rest that I felt. I had had enough. And, what I’ve come to realize is that my experience isn’t nearly as exceptional as I, at first, believed. You see, depression is a form of chronic pain. You wake up one day after the next, clinging to the promise of new mercies, only to realize that yet again you’re thinking of your abuse, yet again your head is hurting, yet again a doctor comes up short, yet again you and your wife are at each other, yet again the feelings of loneliness and abandonment persist. And, it’s the cumulative effect of this persistent pain that seems to drain life of its hope. It’s like a low-grade fever burning the joy from your soul.

God Ran After Him

v. 5b “And behold, an angel touched him and said to him, “Arise and eat.” When Elijah leaves his servants in Beersheba and then goes another day’s journey further, this is him essentially abandoning his ministry, his calling, his life as a prophet. He’s left the boundaries of Israel and Judah. He’s out. That’s what makes verse five so significant. Elijah ran, but God ran after him. Elijah gave up, but God persisted. It’s for you when you live as though He isn’t real. Think of all of the different ways in which God shows kindness to Elijah. He pursues him. He ministers to him by giving him food, water, and rest. He's patient with him.

The Gospel is for Real People

We are tempted to believe that our depression and all of the thoughts and all of the frustrated prayers and all of the bitter nights will be met with rejection from God. We are tempted to believe that every day of depression is a day that renders even more worthless to God. But, Depression doesn’t incur the rejection of God. It arouses his mercy, and from his mercy, kindness. The gospel is for real people with real problems. That’s why it’s so wonderful. It’s not for tiny problems or for tiny sins. It’s for prophets who give up on God. It’s for me when I accuse God of abandoning me. So, you don’t have to smile through the sorrow. You don’t have to rush through the brokenness. You don’t have to prove yourself useful. Depression is an opportunity for us to realize that God’s love for us isn’t dependent upon our usefulness to him.

Depression will “reveal” God’s “nearness”.

v. 9 “There he came to a cave and lodged in it. And behold, the word of the LORD came to him...” (Draw a triangle that shows the three sides to depression - heart(emotions), soul(spirit), & might (body).) Notice how well God knows Elijah. He knows exactly what Elijah needs. What Elijah experiences is part of what good comes from pain. Depression will “reveal” God’s “nearness”. He knows how to care for us. I want you to notice the specific way that God ministers to Elijah in his depression. This can help us as we seek to navigate our own depression or if we’re counseling someone we love who is. The way in which God ministers to Elijah shows the multilayered, complex nature of the depression we may face. So, you’ll notice that in verses 5-8, that twice Elijah goes to sleep, and twice he is awakened to eat and drink. Then, it’s in that strength that he goes. Now, at this point, God has not confronted Elijah on a single issue. He has not addressed a single, spiritual reality. First, He meets Elijah’s physical needs. After those he is rested and fed, God sends him on a 40 day journey to Horeb. That’s a lot more days than the amount of time it should have taken. God is still ministering to him. Then, in verse 9, after he’s nursed him back to health and then after he’s ministered to him in the wilderness, God’s word comes to him to correct and teach him. You see we are integrated people. How are we to love God? With all of our “hearts and souls and might”.

Depression is an Invitation to Rest

Physical health promotes spiritual health. Spiritual health promotes emotional health. And, if one of these gets out of whack, it affects the others. You need the word of God in the midst of your sorrow, but you need sleep, too. You need a vacation. You need to eat well. Depression is an invitation to rest. The Scriptures must come to minister to you, but you ought to check to see if you have a vitamin deficiency or a problem with your pituitary gland, too. I want you to see that this is Biblically warranted. That’s why Paul says that your resurrection will be in the body. Your body is part of you, and it’s connected to your heart and to your soul.

A Sheer Silence

v. 12b “ And after the fire the sound of a low whisper.” After the word of the LORD comes to Elijah, a strange seen takes place. God calls Elijah out on to the ledge of the mountain. It’s the same mountain where Moses had received the ten commandments, and you’ll remember that God had manifested his presence to Moses and to Israel in a great storm upon the mountain. His presence was unmistakeable. But, now, a violent wind comes and shatters the rocks, but the LORD isn’t in the wind. An earthquake shakes the ground, but God’s not there either. A fire ignites the mountain, but the presence of God is noticeably absent. And then, a “sheer silence”, “a brief sound of silence” stills the whole mountain, and Elijah covers his face, knowing he’s in the presence of God.

Wearing Tinted Glasses

You see, the absence of a miracle doesn’t mean the abandonment of God. Stephen Altrogge points out that “depression is like wearing tinted glasses. Everywhere you look, things look dark.” All of the places that you once saw God seem to conceal Him now. So, what do you do when everything appears dark and God seems silent? That’s the point. Sometimes God’s voice is obvious, and sometimes it isn’t. Sometimes God works through the miraculous, but most often, He doesn’t. Sometimes God seems close, but others He seems far away. What are we to do? We’re to place our trust in God’s word to us. In his promise to remain near to us. When God asks Elijah twice, “What are doing here, Elijah?” God is asking him, “Don’t you trust me? Don’t you believe that I am with you? Don’t you know that I am near?” “The LORD is near the broken-hearted and saves the crushed in spirit.” (Psalm 34:18) You have hope, even if you don’t feel like it. You have hope, even if you don’t see it. You have hope because you have the promised nearness of God. Cling to that one more day.

Depression will “realize” God’s “greatness”.

v. 17 “And the one who escapes from the sword of Hazael shall Jehu put to death, and the one who escapes from the sword of Jehu shall Elisha put to death.” And, one day, you’ll be looking back upon the darkest days of your life, and you’ll see clearly, as we see it clearly in Elijah’s life, how God has cared for you through them and kept his word at every step. You’ll see just how close He’s been the whole time. That’s the point of the strange instructions God gives to Elijah in verses 15-18. You see, Elijah thought that God he was the very last defender of the covenant. Elijah believed that he had to bear the weight of God’s promises and God’s covenant and God’s people all by himself. He keeps saying, “I, even I only, am left, and they seek my life to take it away.” He was convinced that Baal worship would never end, and God’s glory would never survive. So, Elijah believed himself too important, and his God too puny. This was the spiritual pillar of Elijah’s depression. And, it’s been the primary cause of mine, too.

God’s promises were resting on God, and God alone, not upon Elijah. God didn’t need Elijah any more than He needed Hazael or Jehu or Elisha. None of them are the point. God has a plan we can’t see, and providence we can’t stop. That’s the point. He was going to sustain his covenant. He was going to save the remnant of 7000. He was going to destroy the worship of Baal. It didn’t depend upon Elijah, and it doesn’t depend upon me. And, it doesn’t depend upon you. Depression brings you to the end of yourself. It wipes from you every false illusion you have of your own strength. It crushes every inkling of self-sufficiency or strength within. And, it brings you to the end of yourself because depression will “realize” God’s “greatness”. It points you beyond yourself.

It’s Okay to Be Damaged

You can’t ruin everything. Because everything doesn’t rest upon you. Depression makes us realize that we are damaged people, a thought that we find almost unpalatable. None of us wants to be considered damaged. That’s why we suffer in silence. That’s why we join the ranks of the pretenders. That’s why we cover our sorrow with a smile and our anxiety with humor. But, God has chosen to shine his light through cracked pots. It’s through damaged people that He displays his greatness. That’s what makes the gospel beautiful. That’s what gives us hope in our darkest days. God has plans you can’t see and a providence that you can’t stop; yet, He still includes you. It’s okay to be damaged. Jesus is still putting us back together, and through us, through our depression, through our brokenness, his greatness will be realized.