I Corinthians 7:1-9
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I Corinthian 7:1-16, ROUGH DRAFT
Today we look at 2 subjects specifically in our study through I Corinthians:
Sex within Marriage and Divorce
Read I Corinthians 7:1-16
Pray
Intro - John and I teach 1 Bible class at Thomas Jefferson, once a week. He teaches an 8th grade class on Tuesday, and I teach 9th grade on Thursday. At the beginning of the year I ask the students to take a 3x5 card, write at least 1 question they have about the Bible, not place their name on it and turn it in.
-When we have time in class, beyond our regular lesson, I’ll answer a question. Through the 1st semester we work through the questions.
The Corinthians had written to Paul and asked him to address some questions they had. This part of the letter Paul is responding to questions they raised - specifically about sex in marriage and divorce.
Life of Corinth would make the show Real Housewives of Beverly Hills look like Scooby Doo.
Not only did you have many of the men involved with the Temple Prostitutes, but you people all over the city having affairs, getting divorces, remarried, divorced again … some having concubines live in their houses with the family, slave boys being used for pedophelia… It was a mess.
People were getting saved and coming into the church, but were not giving up these practices. Many didn’t know to give these things up.
Can you imagine how this effected the church?
SO the Corinthians wrote to Paul and said, Hey - there are some complicated things in our church and we don’t know how to handle them. Would you give us clarity.
-Paul is happy to answer their questions.
The 1st thing we see is that there was a question on whether or not about sex out side of marriage.
1. God’s Gift Of Marriage Is Good, vs 1
7:1, It is good for a person to be sexually pure outside of marriage. It is good for a man & a woman to not be controlled by his sexual appetite.
5 Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry.
-To those who are not married, young and old, stay sexually pure.
-Work to love following Jesus more than following your sexual desires.
-Seek purity for Jesus in all of our life, but particularly in your sexuality.
-It is good for a man, outside of marriage, not to have relations with a woman.
but...
Transition - One of the ways we stay sexually pure is for the Christ follower to express their sexuality with a Christian marriage.
2. God created marriage to help with sexual purity.
Read vs. 2
7:2, Because purity is so important, if your temptations are too great, get married.
-Sexual expression isn’t the only reason to get married, but it is A reason to get married.
We see this also in verses 8-9
Read verses 8-9
Paul tells the unmarried and widows.
It’s ok to get married if you are finding it difficult to stay pure.
“It is better to get married than to burn with sensual passion.”
Marriage (one woman to one man) is the right and only place that sexual intimacy should ever take place.
-This was a massive struggle in the culture in Corinth.
-It is a big problem in our culture as well.
-You say well, I old - that’s not an issue for people my age.
One of the significant medical treatments in many nursing homes as well as down in The Villages in Florida - is for Venereal Disease.
-So yes, sexual purity is something that people of many ages has to be careful of.
Also, for all age groups...
-It is very common for unmarried couples to live together before they get married.
-Now, Many couples don’t live together before they get married, they just live together and ignore marriage all together.
4 Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.
A God focused life says, I will follow Christ, even when culture tells me not to. I will marry and hold purity high because my marriage is a picture of Christ and His bride the Church.
31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.
A godly pure marriage gives a witness to others of how Christ (the groom) relates to the Church (the bride). Part of your Gospel witness to others, part of how you stand out like a shining light on a hill, is by having a marriage of purity.
A Christ follower considering marriage will say...
-I will make a lifelong commitment to marriage knowing that God will use marriage as a witness to unbelievers.
God will also use marriage to sanctify me. I will have to trust God when it’s not easy. I can’t just walk out.
-These verses about staying pure before marriage can be applied to long engagements where the temptation to be impure is very great. Consider not having a long engagement. Go ahead and get married.
-One wonderful thing that the pandemic has taught us is that you can get married in a small private wedding and not spend tens of thousands of dollars.
-Average wedding cost in Georgia is $21,000
-That comes our to $159 per guest.
-We’ve go it easy, the national average is $33,000
Let me encourage you with this...
-A $100 wedding counts just as much as a $21,000
-A breif engagement helps you honor the holiness of God in your purity.I
llustration - I joke with Susan my wife and say that during our engagement she was like an octopus because she couldn’t keep her hands off of me.
-The truth is that we had to make some very specific choices of where we would be and where we would not be during our engagement - so that we would not be overcome by temptation.
-There were places that we would not go, if it meant being alone.
-If it was dark outside we wouldn’t sit in a car and talk - we would find a semi-public place to talk.
-We went so far to have a godly professor at our Bible college hold us accountable to purity.
-My friends, the Culture has changed.
-In this day and age, purity isn’t something that happens to you, if you live a nice life.
-In this day and age, impurity hunts you down and finds you, you have to fight to stay pure.
Summary, God created marriage to help with sexual Purity.
Transition - The 3rd teaching we see in our passage is to Married Couples.
3.Be eager and available for intimacy.
Read vs. 3-5
Illustration -
Many years ago Susan and I were in a Sunday school class with a married couple named Brad and Laura Collins - from Columbia County.
Brad was known for saying some of the funniest and off the wall things.
He was one of those guys that is best described by the saying, “he’s just not right”.
That day in Sunday School Brad and his wife Laura were siting in the class together. The class was full with about 15 people present.
The topic of the Sunday School class that day was heaven.
Once the topic was announced and the opening prayer was given, Brad immediately spoke up at the beginning of class and asked the Sunday School Teacher, “I have a question, Will there be sex in heaven?”
-We were all surprised with the question. Odd and bold question right out of the gate.
-The poor teacher had not prepared to answer that question.
-The teacher mumbled and stumbled and embarrassingly says, No Brad I don’t think there will be any sex in heaven.
-While sitting next to his wife, Brad loudly responds, “Well that’s good, because I feel like I’m in heaven already.”
-I don’t think he helped his cause.
What is the teaching of this verse?
You must be available to satisfy your husband’s or wife’s physical needs.
-You need to place your husband or wife in the position to be successful in their sexual purity.
-Being sexually unavailable places your spouse in a weak position in the area of sexual purity.
-If you are the one in your marriage who needs more intimate attention than your spouse, where you have greater desire than they do ... your sexual frustration is no excuse to look outside of marriage to have your sexual needs met. Including in the area of pornography. Pause
In Corinth, If a man was finding his needs met with Temple prostitutes, a child slave, or a live in concubine & he was going to live a biblical life, he had to get rid of all of that.
-Now his attention would be focused on his wife.
-She wasn’t used to meeting his needs.
-I bet she felt hurt or jealous of him going other places (even if it was the norm in the culture).
-For both husband and wife, there was going to have to be a major change.
-Maybe at first it would be more difficult to make intimacy a priority.
Today
We say, but life is busy, we have kids. Who has time and energy for intimacy?
Let me give you a few practical tips on making intimacy a priority with your spouse:
Tip #1, -Be intentional, plan your intimate times.
-You say, Plan the times?! That’s not spontaneous and romantic.
-Answer, but it is obedient. It pleases God. Right now what you are doing maybe isn’t obedient.
-Sit down with your spouse with a goal.
-We are going to try and be intimate “X” number of times a week. You set that number.
-Then you set the times that work best.
-It’s not going to be perfect, but it will honor the Lord and honor your spouse.
Tip #2 -Clear away hinderances to intimacy
-There may be lack of intimacy because of an insecurity.
-There may be lack of intimacy because of hurt feelings.
-There may be lack of intimacy because of a physical/medical issue.
-Have a conversation about this.
-I have talked to many couples who struggle with physical intimacy. It is much more common than you would ever imagine.
-In some cases, seeking medical help is appropriate.
-If there is something in your relationship that is getting in the way of intimacy.
It’s time to deal with it. It’s time to get help and talk about it.
-If this is you in your marriage, would you make time this Labor Day weekend to have this awkward but loving conversation and begin to deal with this issue.
-Our bodies do not belong to us.
Last week we saw that God has authority over our body, but today in verse 4.
vs 4, says your spouse has authority over your body (both husband and wife)
Look at how generous God is:
-He wants you to be physically intimate with your spouse.
-If there is something in your marriage that is hindering intimacy. God wants you to deal with it, because He wants your marriage to be a blessing to you.
He wants your marriage to be healthy and be a blessing to others.
-God desires difficult areas of marriage to be dealt with.
Why? When we face our hurts or failings with God’s grace we grow more deeply spiritually.
-God confronts us in our marriages, because God is good.
Gospel
-Marriage is meant to be a picture of the Christ Follower’s relationship to Jesus
-Jesus died on the cross to deal with the sin that had wrecked His relationship with His Bride The Church.
-Jesus did the most difficult thing - dying the torturous death of a criminal so that His church would be pure and spotless.
-If you are not a Christ follower, God is inviting you to trust in Faith that His gift on the Cross paid for your sins to make you pure.
-He is inviting you to have faith and follow Him right now.
-God is inviting you into a relationship of spiritual intimacy.
-If you have never trusted Jesus as your Lord and Savior, will you give your life to Him?
-Will you say, “Yes” to Him?
-Will you begin a close spiritual relationship with God?
