What Are You Doing Here?

Scripture

1 Kings 19:1–10 NIV

Now Ahab told Jezebel everything Elijah had done and how he had killed all the prophets with the sword. So Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah to say, “May the gods deal with me, be it ever so severely, if by this time tomorrow I do not make your life like that of one of them.” Elijah was afraid and ran for his life. When he came to Beersheba in Judah, he left his servant there, while he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness. He came to a broom bush, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, Lord,” he said. “Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.” Then he lay down under the bush and fell asleep. All at once an angel touched him and said, “Get up and eat.” He looked around, and there by his head was some bread baked over hot coals, and a jar of water. He ate and drank and then lay down again. The angel of the Lord came back a second time and touched him and said, “Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you.” So he got up and ate and drank. Strengthened by that food, he traveled forty days and forty nights until he reached Horeb, the mountain of God. There he went into a cave and spent the night. And the word of the Lord came to him: “What are you doing here, Elijah?” He replied, “I have been very zealous for the Lord God Almighty. The Israelites have rejected your covenant, torn down your altars, and put your prophets to death with the sword. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me too.”

Pray

Introduction

Three years ago, Harvey.

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I found myself unchecked, no accountability, unhealthy, and burned out. Running on my own adrenaline. All kinds of factors too. Conflict in leadership and best way forward. The trauma of the event. The exhaustion. My savior complex. The pressure from congregants to make the right decision for the church.

I left every house and wept. I was just sad. Tired. I didn’t want to do it anymore. I reached an unhealthy place mentally. I was done.

Fortunately this was an isolated event, and it was the result of some external factors that I could respond to or pull away from. For some mental health or mental illness is much more out of their control. Or hard to explain if not unexplainable. My experience was only a soft introduction into what burnout and depression could feel like, though I have definitely walked with people that have faced these difficulties. Or debilitating unexplainable or irrational anxiety attacks.

The story of Elijah gives us a unique window into human frailty of one of the great heroes of Scripture.

Elijah is one of the bright spots of the story of Kings and the downward spiral of Israel’s two kingdoms.

Let me set the stage a little:

Elijah, fearless prophet of God

Things are pretty good during King David’s years, some good years during son King Solomon’s reign for 40 years but the beginning of syncretism and infidelity when it comes to following the one true God, Yahweh. Fast-forward a little ways to King Omri. He is negotiating with another pagan kingdom and allows his son, future king Ahab, to marry a Phoenician women, Jezebel.

Jezebel, is a bad lady. Not in a good way. Jezebel is one of those biblical names that never took off for babies.

Ahab and Jezebel take over the throne of Israel. Jezebel worships Baal, Canaanite god of fertility and worship of Baal is invited if not given preference in Israel.

God calls Elijah. We do not know much about him when he comes on the scene but he is going to be an instrument of God’s war against Baal and this idolatry in the land. First God sends him to face off against Ahab but bringing word that a drought is coming in the land. Says to the king....it wont rain until I say it will.

Later Elijah, confronts Ahab and Jezebel and challenges the prophets of Baal to a showdown between Yahweh and Baal at Mt. Carmel. Incredible scene....describe it.

Then Elijah tells Ahab to take off before the rain comes. He waits until he is gone and God comes on him and boom he takes off.

Ahab gets to Jezebel…the real power in the couple. Look what 1 Kings 19 says:

1 Kings 19:1–2 NIV

Now Ahab told Jezebel everything Elijah had done and how he had killed all the prophets with the sword. So Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah to say, “May the gods deal with me, be it ever so severely, if by this time tomorrow I do not make your life like that of one of them.”

Verse 3 says, he is afraid and he runs for his life. Quickly something has changed for Elijah....

Elijah, hopeless and far from God

Then, everything changes all of a sudden. A once powerful and courageous messenger of God. Full of confidence and the benefactor of incredible success is reduced to this....let’s read this again:

1 Kings 19:3–5 NIV

Elijah was afraid and ran for his life. When he came to Beersheba in Judah, he left his servant there, while he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness. He came to a broom bush, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, Lord,” he said. “Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.” Then he lay down under the bush and fell asleep. All at once an angel touched him and said, “Get up and eat.”

Goodness....how did we get here? How did he get to this point? As one commentator points out, Elijah has all the signs of what we would call clinical depression:

He appears to be totally worn out and fatigued. We will see him need to sleep a lot

He needs to be told to eat

He feels lonely while also choosing to be alone (he left his servant in Judah, when being alone was probably the last thing he needed)

His reality is distorted

Elijah is done. Some say he is facing ministerial burnout…maybe like what I mentioned earlier. This seems like a severe mental event. Elijah is not well. Whatever is going on with Elijah we do not need to get a diagnosis for him, but we can learn from this interaction and we can learn for a minute about mental illness.

There is such a stigma in the church about mental illness. In many ways I think we have been sheltered from the conversation and we do not know how to do it. I just want to normalize it a little for us today. I want to encourage the room but also hope that this will be one conversation among many.

Mental illness:

CDC

What is mental illness?

Mental illnesses are conditions that affect a person’s thinking, feeling, mood or behavior, such as depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, or schizophrenia. Such conditions may be occasional or long-lasting (chronic) and affect someone’s ability to relate to others and function each day.

What is mental health?

Mental health includes our emotional, psychological, and social well-being. It affects how we think, feel, and act. It also helps determine how we handle stress, relate to others, and make healthy choices. Mental health is important at every stage of life, from childhood and adolescence through adulthood.

Not interchangeable. Someone can experience poor mental health and not be diagnosed with mental illness. Someone with mental illness can have good mental health in seasons.

Can I just share some staggering statistics with you?

How common are mental illnesses?

Mental illnesses are among the most common health conditions in the United States. Leading cause of disability worldwide.

More than 50% will be diagnosed with a mental illness or disorder at some point in their lifetime.

1 in 5 Americans will experience a mental illness in a given year.

1 in 5 children, either currently or at some point during their life, have had a seriously debilitating mental illness.

1 in 25 Americans lives with a serious mental illness, such as schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, or major depression.

These are serious numbers and we must consider them.

This is national suicide prevention month:

90% of those who die by suicide are living with an underlying mental illness that is not being treated or not fully being treated because there is so much we do not know about the brain and how all of this works.

Now, I would like to address some of stigma through the lens of Elijah’s story:

This is not a faith problem

Elijah is at the height of his mission with God. He has stood in front of 450 prophets that represent a foreign god and a king that would kill him at any moment. He has the faith to build this altar and believe God will show up. Taken in a snapshot…if you just see Elijah running for his life, you might think he has lost his faith in God. But that is not the case

Church, mental illness is not a direct consequence of a lack of faith.

person that hears me and is struggling today....this is not because a lack of faith or sin-punishment

Parallel (John 9): Who sinned, this man or his parents that he was blind? Jesus says....no, you are missing it. This is brokenness and the glory of God is about to be on display.

the impetus of mental illness is not a lack of faith or sin.

Friends, the majority of the time....”you just need to pray more” is not a helpful statement to make. How you help someone like this is to pray for them and over them. Encourage their faith support it, but do not blame it. Mental illness is about brokenness, it is not from God.

As a pastor, hear me, faith will be everything in this fight. Fight and believe in God. But don’t you dare hear the lie, that this is happening because you don’t believe deeply enough.

This is not weakness

Elijah has proven strength and endurance. He has faced death, he has literally physically outrun Ahab. He has proven to be emotionally steady. He has handled stress. The fact that he can’t now does not equal weakness

Here in the room, your depression is not a sign of weakness. It is a sign of trauma, pain, burnout, exhaustion, and facing more than you can handle....externally, internally, and spiritually.

There is a tendency to hide these struggles from each other. You, can’t do that.

Example: Lauren came across this podcast by Jaimie Ivey where she interviewed Kayla Stoecklein. She is the wife of Adam who was a pastor of a large church in California until he died by suicide. She shared about the absolute shock of suicide. OMG, so hard.

Man, listen, it is hard to pastor, it is especially hard right now, pray for your clergy and encourage them (and I am not asking you to pat me on the back after church, but when you see Doug, Marc, Gerry, encourage them).

Anyways Kayla shared about how serious the mental illness and how much they just had no idea looking back and they were doing everything they could. But they just didnt know. For obvious reasons much of their story was hard for us, but the words that stuck with me the most were:

“We have to invite people into our pain.” For Lauren and I, it was saying out loud that we have to talk to each other about mental health. To share those things. And we often say to each other you need to talk to others.

Many of us are walking a thin dangerous line…and you will not know you cross the line until it is really bad.

But there is good news in the story of Elijah. If this was about a lack of faith or weakness, then the response of God would be rebuke. this is where the question that God asks comes into play....

What are you doing here?

God comes through a messenger to feed Elijah, first letting him sleep. After Elijah eats, God gives him more time to sleep. To rest his body from the exhaustion of his work, ministry, from his fear, from his running. Then he wakes him again....look at verse 7 again:

1 Kings 19:7 NIV

The angel of the Lord came back a second time and touched him and said, “Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you.”

God acknowledges that the journey is too much. Church! Beloved walking with depression or chronic anxiety, or trauma of loss or diagnosis…here me:

Pastor

teacher

mom

dad

CEO

person with cancer diagnosis

The journey can be too hard for you.

Then God leads him on a deeper journey to Mount Horeb. “The Mountain of God.” He goes into a cave and spends the night. He sleeps some more!!! Finally, God speaks directly, “What are you doing here?” Elijah gives an answer but it isn't satisfactory

There is this beautiful scene where God shows up:

a powerful wind tears apart the mountain, but God wasn’t there

An earthquake shakes the ground Elijah stands on, but God is not there

Then a fire comes, but God is not there

then a whisper, and Elijah hears the voice of God

God whispers, what are you doing here. This time the questions means something different, and Elijah’s answer does too.

Then God sends him back. verse 15 on, describes the journey back right into the predicament he came from. With changes, but still back into the storm.

God is with you

God’s response is not rebuke. It is one of care. Physical, emotional, and finally Spiritual.

God’s response is natural and spiritual

Depending on what you are facing there is a natural response. rest. food. people. But also professional help, medicine, doctors.

and there is a spiritual response. I know I said faith isnt the impetus of the problem, but listen brokenness in the world is also a spiritual battle.

God brings healing through both.

God sends him back. Part of this is unexplainable. Hard to understand. But listen, God wants to work in and through to bring redemption and healing into the world. Maybe it is through your story. Maybe he is doing something very specific in you as you fight in this.

Closing:

Can I give you three challenges to close:

if you are in the battle today, come pray with us. But also talk to someone and invite them into your pain

For everyone here today, make it a point to talk about mental health

Engage in the mess