Brides Procession.1271
BRIDES PROCESSION
Ref. 1271
BIBLE READING: Genesis 2:22
After the bride is veiled, the couple is led to the chupah for the actual ceremony.
It is customary that the groom be led to the chupah first. There are several reasons for this:
1. CHUPAH
The first reason is legalistic. Chupah - the domain of the groom; he must be there to make it his domain. Then he welcome his bride into the chupah. This custom is also rooted in the very first wedding. After Adam and Eve were created, the Torah says that God took Eve, “and brought her to Adam” (Genesis 2:22).
Adam was the first of the two created. Looking at the creation, each subsequent creature involved a higher form of life. Since Eve would have to be able to hold new life (the foetus) in her body, her essence was considered more refined than that of Adam, and she was created later.
This was reflected in the wedding between God and Israel. The Torah says, “Moses led the people out of the camp to meet God” (Exodus 19:17). The Midrash teaches that Moses led the Israelites to God, just as a bride is led to the groom. Just as God was the first one at Sinai, so the groom is the first one at the chupah.
2. KNOTS
In many circles, it is a custom for the groom to undo all the knots in his clothing. The groom is about to be bound to the bride, and, at this time. He should not be bound in any other way.
3. EMPTY POCKETS
It is also a custom in many circles for the groom not to have anything in his pockets.
One reason for this is so that the bride will take him as he is - even with empty pockets. This indicates that she accepts him for what he is, and not for his possessions. For much the same reason; it is a custom in some place for a bride not to wear any jewellery under the chupah.
Further more, the groom is in the place of Adam when he was first created. Just as Adam did not have any private possessions, neither does the groom.
4. KITTEL
As we have discussed, one of the reasons that the groom wears a kittel on his wedding day is to recall the day of his death. The kittel is a garment without pockets, indicating that the person takes nothing with him when he leaves this world. Similarly, the groom has nothing in his pockets during the wedding ceremony, to remind him that he will leave the world empty-handed.
It is also taught that, on his wedding day a bridegroom is like the High Priest (Cohen Gadol) going into the Holy of Holies. The Holy of Holies is like the wedding chamber (chupah), and the High Priest is drawing himself into intimate relationship with God, just as a bridegroom is preparing for an intimate relationship with his bride. Just as the garments of the High Priest do not have any pockets, so the groom goes into the chupah with nothing in his pockets. Just as on Yom Kippur, the High Priest went in with plain white vestments Leviticus 16:4 the groom goes in wearing a plain white kittel. Just as the High priest. wore no gold on this day, the groom wears no jewellery when he enters the chupah.
5. RIGHT FOOT
It is a custom to instruct the groom to begin the march with his right foot first. In this way, he will start out his marriage “on the right foot” This also indicates that his marriage will be right.
6. MUSIC
It is a custom to play music as the bridegroom is led to the chupah. In the Holy Temple, in Jerusalem, the Levites would play music as the cohen-priests marched to their divine service.; in a similar fashion music is played for the bride and groom when they are led to the chupah.
7. LED BY TWO PEOPLE
It is customary for two people to lead the groom to the chupah.
This also has its antecedents in the first wedding in Eden. The Midrash teaches that when Adam married Eve; the archangels, Michael and Gabriel, accompanied him to the chupah. In a similar manner, today, the groom is accompanied by two attendants.
Also, when God came to Sinai for His great marriage to Israel, He was accompanied by two attendants. In this case the two "attendants" were the two Tablets upon which the Commandments were written.
There are varied customs as to who accompanies the groom. In many circles, the groom’s father and mother accompany him. Similarly, when the bride walks down the aisle, she is accompanied by her father and mother. The Zohar states explicitly that “the father and mother of the bride bring her to the domain of the groom.”
In other circles, however, the groom is accompanied by his father and his future father-in-law. Similarly, the bride is accompanied by her mother and the groom’s mother. This is the custom in Chassidic circles, as well as among some German Jews.
None of this, however, is a hard and fast rule; where it is impossible for a parent to accompany the bride or groom, any other close friend or relative may be substituted.
8. CANDLES
It is a custom for the ones leading the groom and bride to the chupah to carry candles in their hands. In many circles, they use braided Havdalah candles. It is possible that this custom dates back to Biblical times. The prophet speaks of, “the sound of a bridegroom, the sound of a bride the light of a lamp” (Jeremiah 25:10). In Talmudic times, candles or lamps were always associated with weddings.
On the simplest level, the reason for this custom is that candles and light are always associated with joy. It is thus written, “The Jews had light, gladness, joy and honour” (Esther 8:16). The candles indicate that the couple's life together will be one of light and joy.
This same light and joy was also present at Mount Sinai, at the great wedding between Israel and God, when the Torah was given. The Torah describes Mount Sinai as surrounded by lightning flashes and fire. The Israelites were accompanied by lightning (Exodus 19:16 and God was accompanied by fire (Exodus 19:18) The bride and groom today are similarly accompanied by fire.
Some authorities say that this is the reason that braided Havdalah candles are used. Such candles are like torches, and the Talmud teaches that the light of a torch flickers and jumps. The braided candles have a light that resembles the flickering lightning at Sinai.
Another reason for the fire is based on an important analysis of man an woman. In Hebrew, the word for man is “ish” while the word for woman is “ishah”. Both words are the same, except that “ish” is written with a yod, while “isha” is written with a heh, however, one of God's names is the name “Yah”, and the Talmud teaches that the Yod of this name is in the word “ish” meaning man, while the “heh” is in the word “isha”, meaning woman. This indicates that when there is love and harmony between man and woman, God's name is with them.
However, in both ish and ishah, if the letters of God's name are removed, what remains is the word esh, meaning fire. This teaches that when God is not with a man and woman their relationship can be disharmonious and as painful as fire.
Some sources note that the bride and groom are accompanied by torches to remind them that their relationship can be joyous, but if God is removed, it can be as painful a fire. It is to remind them that they must always maintain peace and harmony in their relationship.
Another interesting reason given for the candles is based on the fact that every Hebrew letter has a numerical value. The Hebrew word for candle or lamp is ner, which has a numerical value of 250. Since each of the individuals accompanying the groom (or bride) carries a candle, there are two candles, having a combined numerical value of 500.
It is also taught that a man has 248 limbs, while a woman has 252. Adding up these two numbers, one has a sum of 500. This is the sum of the two candles. Therefore, the two candles allude to the man and woman coming together.
The blessing to have children is in the Bible. It is “Be fruitful and multiply Genesis 1:28), peru u'revu in Hebrew. Peru has a numerical value of 286, while u’revu has a value of 214. Added together, the, two also add up to 500. The two candles with this numerical value thus allude to the hope that the couple will have a fruitful, abundant marriage.
When the groom approaches the chupah, the cantor chants:
Blessed is he who comes.
This is an idiomatic expression meaning “welcome.” The groom is greeted like a king under the chupah.
Then, while the groom is standing under the chupah, the cantor chants:
He who is mighty over all, He who is blessed over all,
He who is great over all, He who is supreme over all, may
He bless the bridegroom and the bride.
This poem is chanted as a praise to God. It is taught before blessing a human being, one should first bless God. Since the bride and groom will be blessed under the chupah, a chant is first sung that praises God.
In some circles, it is customary to have a regular procession including, brothers and sisters of the bride and groom, grandparents, ushers, bridesmaids, and flower girls. While there is no objection to this practice, it is of very recent origin and apparently has no source in Jewish tradition. In some circles, the only ones marching to the chupah are the bride and the groom.
In any case, the last one to come under the chupah is the bride. It is taught “last is most precious” since the star of the wedding is the bride she is led to the chupah last. The music played while the bride comes to the chupah is considered very important, and should be chosen with the greatest care. In some circles, there are special melodies that are played for the bride.
9. CIRCLES
In many circles, it is the custom for the bride to be led around the groom. In some places the custom is that she is led around the groom three time. This custom is based or the Biblical verse, “God has created a new thing on earth a woman shall go around a man” (Jeremiah 31:21).
The Talmud derives an important lesson from this verse, teaching, “Whoever lives without a wife, lives without a wall.” The commentaries state that a wife is wall for her husband, protecting him from external temptation. The bride marches around the groom, indicating that, in their married life she will protect him from untoward desires.
The Biblical verse is primarily a Messianic prophecy. Hence, the woman marching around the man indicates the hope or the coming of the Messiah.
As we discussed earlier, one of the symbols of the wedding ring is that of the aura of protection that the husband gives the wife. However, in the Messianic era, man and woman will be equal and the wife will also be able to protect her husband. The woman walks around the man to indicate their hope that the Messianic era will become a full reality.
Another reason for this custom is that the groom is a king. The bride and her attendants walk around the groom as troops parade around a king. Thus, in some circles the entire wedding party accompanies the bride around the groom.
The bride walking around the groom also indicates that she is binding him with certain obligations. As we have seen, a groom has three Torah obligations to his bride. Food clothing and conjugal relations. In places where the bride walks around the groom three times, the circuits are represent these obligations. The custom of her making seven circuits indicate the seven additional obligations that were legislated by the rabbis.
The most ancient sources state that it was a custom for the bride to be “given to the groom three times” The reason stated is that the expression, “when a man takes a wife” occurs three times in the Torah. Deuteronomy 22:13, 24:1, 24:5). Later, this developed, into the bride walking around the groom three times.
The three times also indicate that the husband is bound to his bride by three moral obligations. These are spelled out in God’s promise to Israel: “I will betroth you to Me forever. I will betroth you to Me with fairness, justice, love and compassion. I will betroth you to Me with faith and you shall know God” (Hosea 2:21-22). In His relationship to Israel, God was accepting upon Himself the highest obligations that a husband accepts when he marries.
The prevalent custom of the bride walking around the groom seven times is of Cabalistic origin. On the simplest level, seven circuits represent the seven revolutions that the earth made during the seven days of creation. The earth represented by the woman (“mother earth”). Since every marriage is a re-enactment of the creative process, she walks around the groom to indicate that these seven cycles are being repeated.
The seven circuits also indicate that she is binding him in another manner. As soon as he marries her, seven of her relatives become forbidden to him.
The seven circuits also indicate that the bride is praying that the merit of the seven prophetesses and the seven shepherds of Israel protect her marriage and ensure success.
While the bride is walking around the groom, the cantor chants:
May the One who speaks of the rose of thorns, the affection of lovers, the joy of the beloved, may He bless the bridegroom and the bride.
The “rose of thorns” refers to the modest, chaste brides of Israel, regarding whom it is written, “Like a rose among the thorns, so is my beloved among the maidens” (Song of Songs 2:2). This is chanted in honour of the bride, who is like the “rose among thorns” to her groom. Furthermore, the Bible speaks of a “hedge of roses” (Song of Songs 7:3). This is the spirit, of protection from external temptation that the bride gives the groom.
After the circles are completed, the bride stands to the right of the groom, and remains there for the entire ceremony. This symbolises that she will always be at his right side to help him. The custom is alluded to in the verse, “a queen shall stand at your right side” (Psalms 45:10). In Hebrew this is nitzvah shegal le-yemin-kha, which has as its final letters Heh Lamed Kaf .When these letters are re-arranged, they spell out kallah, meaning bride.
10. RIGHT HAND
The bride stands to the groom’s right only under the chupah. At all other times the groom is to the right of the bride.
In most circles the bride and groom face the assembled guests during the ceremony. When performing the wedding ceremony, the rabbi then faces them, and has his back to the guests. Some set up the chupah so that the rabbi is facing east when he recites the blessings.
However, in communities where it is the custom to have the wedding in the synagogue, it is more proper for the bride and groom to face the ark. The rabbi should not have his back to the ark, but should stand somewhat to the side. There is a custom cited where the couple and the rabbi stand to the side of the chupah, so that neither the couple nor the rabbi has their back to the guests. Since there are a variety of customs, in the absence of a definite local practice, the couple can follow their personal preference.
In some circles it is a custom for the rabbi to give a sermon before the ceremony.
If any of the parents of the bride or groom are deceased, it is a custom to recite the prayer El Maley Rachamim for the parent before the ceremony.
It is customary for the parents of the bride and groom to stand with them under the chupah during the ceremony. Other members of the wedding party may also be present under the chupah.
In many circles, it is customary for everyone present to stand during the entire ceremony. This is out of respect for the bride and groom, since they are standing, and they are like a king and queen. Furthermore, at the revelation at Sinai, which was the great wedding between God and Israel, it is written, “the people stood at a distance” (Exodus 20:15). There are also Cabalistic reasons for this. Nevertheless, in many circles it is the practice for the guests to sit during the ceremony.
Everyone present should be respectful during the ceremony. They should be very careful to avoid talking, smoking, or levity.
A minyan, a quorum of ten adult (over 13 years of age), male Jews, should be present for the entire ceremony.
