The Kingdom Manifesto - 17

The Kingdom Manifesto – 17

Live with a Forgiving Heart

Matthew 6:12, 14-15

Introduction

[pic] This is Riley Cooper. Until a few years ago, Cooper’s name was known only to die-hard Philadelphia Eagles fans; then it became a household word. A couple years ago, a video surfaced of a drunk Cooper using a racial slur while claiming he wanted to fight all of the African Americans at a Kenny Chesney concert.

In a statement following the video’s appearance on the internet, Cooper said, “I am so ashamed and disgusted with myself. I want to apologize. I have been offensive... I am so ashamed, but there are no excuses. What I did was wrong, and I will accept the consequences.”

Two very different reactions from two different teammates (both African Americans) illustrate very powerfully the beauty of forgiveness.

The first reaction to Cooper’s apology came from his quarterback, Michael Vick. You remember Vick? The quarterback who spent nearly two years in prison for running an illegal and deadly dog-fighting ring? Vick said: “As a team we understood because we all make mistakes in life and we all do and say things that maybe we do mean and maybe we don’t mean. But as a teammate I forgave him. We understand the magnitude of the situation. We understand a lot of people may be hurt and offended, but I know Riley Cooper...it’s easy for me to forgive him.”

On the other end of the spectrum is LeSean McCoy, the Eagles’ star running back: “I forgive him. We’ve been friends for a long time. But in a situation like this you really find out about someone. Just on a friendship level, I can’t really respect someone like that…I guess the real him came out that day. The cameras are off, you don’t think nobody’s watching or listening, and then you find out who they really are. And to hear how he really came off, that shows you what he’s really all about.”

Now, I know that LeSean McCoy used the words, “I forgive him.” But he completely (and immediately) undercuts those words: “You really find out about someone…I can’t really respect someone like that.” Listen to the most important difference between Vick’s and McCoy’s statements:

Vick: “We all make mistakes and we all do and say things…”

McCoy: “That shows you what he’s really all about.”

Notice that where Vick says “we,” McCoy says “he.” Michael Vick puts himself in a category with Riley Cooper. While LeSean McCoy seeks to distance himself from a former friend, Michael Vick puts himself next to the accused.

The difference between Vick and McCoy? Twenty-one months in a federal penitentiary and a deep knowledge of what it feels like to need forgiveness. Vick made some very foolish mistakes, paid the price, and was accepted and given a second chance by the Eagles.

Commenting on this issue, Tullian Tchividjian, a pastor in Florida writes this...

“To the extent that we ignore (or run from) our own sinfulness, we will be unable to care for other sinners. We will be unable to extend forgiveness to others until we are honest about the extent to which we are forgiven. The most forgiving people are those who are coming to daily, deeper terms with their own need for forgiveness. Ungracious people are those who haven’t come to grips with their own dire, daily need for grace.”

Jesus taught us this truth in Luke 7.

Luke 7:36-47 - One of the Pharisees asked Jesus to have dinner with him, so Jesus went to his home and sat down to eat. When a certain immoral woman from that city heard he was eating there, she brought a beautiful alabaster jar filled with expensive perfume. Then she knelt behind him at his feet, weeping. Her tears fell on his feet, and she wiped them off with her hair. Then she kept kissing his feet and putting perfume on them. When the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, “If this man were a prophet, he would know what kind of woman is touching him. She’s a sinner!”

Then Jesus answered his thoughts. “Simon,” he said to the Pharisee, “I have something to say to you.” “Go ahead, Teacher,” Simon replied. Then Jesus told him this story: “A man loaned money to two people—500 pieces of silver to one and 50 pieces to the other. But neither of them could repay him, so he kindly forgave them both, canceling their debts. Who do you suppose loved him more after that?” Simon answered, “I suppose the one for whom he canceled the larger debt.” “That’s right,” Jesus said. Then he turned to the woman and said to Simon, “Look at this woman kneeling here. When I entered your home, you didn’t offer me water to wash the dust from my feet, but she has washed them with her tears and wiped them with her hair. You didn’t greet me with a kiss, but from the time I first came in, she has not stopped kissing my feet. You neglected the courtesy of olive oil to anoint my head, but she has anointed my feet with rare perfume. “I tell you, her sins—and they are many—have been forgiven, so she has shown me much love. But a person who is forgiven little shows only little love.”

TS - those who have been forgiven much love much. Those who have been forgiven much tend to forgive much. This issue, understanding our own need of forgiveness and then forgiving others, is at the heart of the next statement in the Lord’s Prayer.

Matthew 6:12 - and forgive us our sins, as we have forgiven those who sin against us.

TS - remember, prayer is not about our words, but our hearts. Only a forgiving heart can pray this. Let’s break this down. How do I live with a forgiving heart?

1. UNDERSTAND YOUR OWN NEED OF FORGIVENESS

That is how Jesus began this statement...forgive us.

In 1973 psychiatrist Karl Menninger published a book with the title, Whatever Became of Sin? His point was that sociology and psychology were beginning to avoid terms like “evil,” or “immorality,” and “wrongdoing.” Menninger then detailed how the theological notion of sin became the legal idea of crime and then slid further from its true meaning and became nothing more than the psychological category of sickness.

Now, it’s gone even further. We’re not sinners at all anymore. As many have observed, we’re just “mistakers.” And we’re even starting to lose that. Lately, we don’t even want to call a sin a mistake. We want to turn everything we do into a virtue. So, lust becomes “sensuality,” and anger just means being honest with your emotions.

Even when we apologize, we say things like, “I’m sorry you were offended at what I said or did.” No admittance that we did anything wrong – just sorry that the other person wasn’t mature enough to handle it.

The latest edition of the Oxford Junior Dictionary for children went all the way and made it official. They removed the word completely. They don’t even have the word “sin” in the dictionary anymore.

James Emery White - “The spiritual dilemma is that until we return to an understanding of being sinners, fully accountable to a holy God, we will never be able to drink from the well of forgiveness. Namely because we will never imagine needing to. But only when our thirst is slaked by grace can we move forward into a life that has been truly redeemed and restored. Because grace, unless cheapened beyond recognition and value, demands one thing: Taking responsibility.” Church and Culture Blog, 5/21/12

The bible is quite clear...we are sinners. God, as a holy God, has set a standard for living. And to fall short of that (which is the literal meaning of the word) is to sin. Absolutely no one is immune from that.

Romans 3:23 - For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard.

William Willimon as quoted in When we Pray by Phil Ryken - “Before there is any talk in the prayer about our forgiving anyone else, we are made to ask for forgiveness ourselves. Before there is any consideration of the wrongs that we have suffered, we are made to ponder the great wrong God has suffered through us.”

If we ever hope to be able to forgive others, then we must begin with the simple, yet profound acknowledgement that we have sinned, and been forgiven in Jesus.

1 John 1:8-10 - If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. If we claim we have not sinned, we are calling God a liar and showing that his word has no place in our hearts.

This is not saying that the only way for God to forgive a sin is if we confess that sin. That would be a legalistic interpretation of that verse. What if we forget one? Are we then unsaved because of that? No. This means that we are to be confessing our sinfulness...the fact that we are sinners. God cannot forgive someone who thinks they have no need of it.

And when you are forgiven, and live in the freedom and peace of that, only then will you have the needed motivation and power to forgive others.

James MacDonald - “My capacity to forgive is directly related to my comprehension of how much God loves me.”

2. WILLINGLY OFFER FORGIVENESS TO OTHERS

C.S. Lewis once quipped that everyone thinks forgiveness is a wonderful idea until they have someone to forgive. We like the idea of being forgiven, but not necessarily the idea of forgiving others. But this is how Jesus finished up this statement in the Lord’s Prayer - “...as we have forgiven those who sin against us.”

And it turns out that the motivation to forgive is found in the fact that we ourselves have indeed been forgiven.

Matthew 18:21-22 - Then Peter came to him and asked, “Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?” “No, not seven times,” Jesus replied, “but seventy times seven!

Jesus has just been teaching about how to confront another person when they have sinned against you. Peter’s reaction is...how much? How often? Seven? Rabbinical teaching of the day demanded you to forgive three times. He doubled that, plus one. He is being gracious, so he thinks.

Jesus’ answer is 70x7. So, should we go out a buy a offense journal and track them all up to 490? No. This is a way of saying ‘every single time.’ There is no limit. Why?

Matthew 18:23-33 - “Therefore, the Kingdom of Heaven can be compared to a king who decided to bring his accounts up to date with servants who had borrowed money from him. In the process, one of his debtors was brought in who owed him millions of dollars. He couldn’t pay, so his master ordered that he be sold—along with his wife, his children, and everything he owned—to pay the debt. “But the man fell down before his master and begged him, ‘Please, be patient with me, and I will pay it all.’ Then his master was filled with pity for him, and he released him and forgave his debt. “But when the man left the king, he went to a fellow servant who owed him a few thousand dollars. He grabbed him by the throat and demanded instant payment. “His fellow servant fell down before him and begged for a little more time. ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay it,’ he pleaded. But his creditor wouldn’t wait. He had the man arrested and put in prison until the debt could be paid in full. “When some of the other servants saw this, they were very upset. They went to the king and told him everything that had happened. Then the king called in the man he had forgiven and said, ‘You evil servant! I forgave you that tremendous debt because you pleaded with me. Shouldn’t you have mercy on your fellow servant, just as I had mercy on you?’

Shouldn’t you have had mercy...just as I had on you? Sounds a little like teaching that comes later in the New Testament.

Ephesians 4:31-32 - Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.

Just as we have been forgiven, so in response to the forgiveness we have received, we then forgive. But what if I don’t want to? What if they don’t deserve it? What if they haven’t said they were sorry? Won’t I just be enabling?

This is the difficulty found in forgiveness. Let’s be honest...what they did to you was wrong. Unjust. Maybe even brutal. It has done perhaps some irreparable damage. So, what if they are not sorry? Do I have to forgive then? That sounds logical and fair. But we have to admit there is nothing at all logical and fair about forgiveness.

Steven Furtick - “Forgiveness doesn’t start with the other person. It starts with you and Jesus. Forgiveness is far more about your response to the gospel than it is about the repentance of the person who hurt you. It’s about believing that the cross of Jesus Christ is a sufficient payment. Not only for everything you’ve done. But also for everything that’s been done to you. It’s about daring to believe the sometimes scary but unchangeable truth: Jesus Christ loves and died for the person who hurt you just as much as He loves and died for you. No exceptions.”

Forgiveness is laying down our rights to get even. It is surrendering our ability to claim future repayment of the pain we have incurred by their sin. Forgiving someone is not about letting them get away with it. Because to say “I forgive you” implies a sin on their part. You haven’t said, “It’s okay, don’t worry about it.” Forgiveness is the only response that calls a sin a sin. Sin should never be overlooked, covered up or ignored. It should be faced and forgiven.

Phil Ryken - “So if people do you wrong, forgive them, whether or not they ask for forgiveness. You cannot cancel their sin. Only God can do that, and he will only do it if they repent. But what you can do is set aside your own anger, bitterness, and resentment towards them. In other words, you can forgive them.”

Only a forgiving heart can pray this prayer. So much so that the bible lands in a very challenging place in regard to this issue.

Matthew 6:14-15 - “If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.

Matthew 18:34-35 - Then the angry king sent the man to prison to be tortured until he had paid his entire debt. “That’s what my heavenly Father will do to you if you refuse to forgive your brothers and sisters from your heart.”

Let’s talk through this. Let me tell you what this is not saying, then what it is saying. This is NOT saying that your forgiveness from God is dependent on your forgiveness of others. That if you don’t forgive you are not forgiven. That would make salvation works-based. But we know salvation is only by God’s grace alone through faith in Jesus alone.

But here is what this is saying, which is no less challenging - if you find your heart at a place where it will not forgive, it is so hardened that you are bitter, resentful, holding on to grudges...and this is to a place where it defines you...the question you have to ask yourself is this - have I really experienced the life-transforming, grace-inducing forgiveness of Jesus?

The willingness and ability to forgive others IS the mark of someone who has been forgiven.

Steven Furtick - “In order to be free of the weight of your sin you had to receive the forgiveness of Jesus. In order to be free of the weight of someone else’s sin you must give the forgiveness of Jesus.”

Matthew 6:12 - and forgive us our sins, as we have forgiven those who sin against us.

INVITATION – BELIEVE/REPENT/CONFESS/BAPTIZE

COMMUNION