Family Disputes

Do Not Murder

People were thinking that they were okay because they had not physically killed anyone. This is the letter of the law, but there is a thing called the spirit of the law. This is not what people understood. So Jesus explains to them what the spirit of the law is.

Let’s first look at the letter of the law:

13 “You shall not murder. Ex. 20:13

This means that you are not to end someones life. The reason for this is that all life is created in the image of God. Since it is made in the image of God it derives value. Our value is not based on accomplishments but by being created in the image of God.

Do Not Be Angry

there are three levels of Anger that Jesus refers to here: anger, contempt, and malice.

Anger

Anger is when you have a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility. All of us have been there. It is when we become frustrated by someone. Often that someone is going to be in your family. Can you recognize when you are angry? When you get angry can you tell why what just happened or is happening makes you angry? Is it because it is inconveniencing you, disrespecting you, or physically hurting you? Often times I find that the source of our anger is based on a violation of what we perceive as inequitable. (Its not fair) So what should we do with this anger?

You can do nothing and let it morph into bitterness. You can lay into the person that you are angry with, or you can separate the person from the issue and resolve the issue.

Contempt

Contempt is the next level of anger. This occurs when you allow anger to fester. It becomes so unmanageable that you have to do something with it. So what you do is you lay into that person and give them a piece of your mind. This is not helpful. Jesus says that you are liable to the supreme court (Pharisees). This is when you call someone an idiot and are unwilling to understand their point of view.

Often this happens in a dispute when you believe you are right and they are wrong. You dismiss them as ignorant and tell them that they are a good-for-nothing. This elevates you over a person.

You have just said what God has made good is not good.

The Gospel of Matthew, Volume 1 Words of Insult (Matthew 5:21–2 Contd)

There is a Rabbinic tale of a certain Rabbi, Simon ben Eleazar. He was coming from his teacher’s house, and he was feeling uplifted at the thought of his own scholarship and erudition and goodness. A very ill-favoured passer-by gave him a greeting. The Rabbi did not return the greeting, but said, ‘You Raca! How ugly you are! Are all the men of your town as ugly as you?’ ‘That’, said the passer-by, ‘I do not know. Go and tell the Maker who created me how ugly is the creature he has made.’ So, there the sin of contempt was rebuked.

Malice

Malice is when you seek to destroy someones character. This is not only expressing contempt, but desiring harm for the person you are angry with. Matthew says that you are in the danger of hell-fire. When you get to this point you have lost control and murder is not far behind. God created us all with purpose. When we hinder someones character to the point that God’s purpose for their life is hindered it is an affront to God.

Be Reconciled

Matthew is saying that in order for you to worship and have an offering that is acceptable, you must be reconciled to your brother. During this time sacrifices were made for the remission of sin. The sinner would have to take his sacrifice to the priest in order to be forgiven of sins. If they gave the sacrifice to the priests and realized there was an unreconciled relationship, the sacrifice would be unacceptable. This is why Matthew says first be reconciled with your brother. This would often requires restitution. Whatever was necessary to reconcile needed to be handled. Tell story about Scott.