Like a Boss - Week 1

INTRODUCTION

1 MINUTE

Have you ever been in charge of something? For example, have you ever been…

· Captain of your soccer team.

· First chair in the symphonic band or orchestra at your school.

· Class or student council president.

· Umpiring at a baseball game.

Or maybe you’re not the boss of anything, but you’ve programmed your iPhone to call you “boss” so that at least Siri will respect your authority.

If we’re honest with ourselves, we all want to be the boss of something.

But whether you are or aren’t currently a boss right now, you’ve definitely had bosses…

· At work.

· Playing sports.

· Sitting in class.

· At home with one or two of the people who brought you into this world.

Even though we may not call them “bosses,” your coaches, teachers, managers, and yes, parents, are all your bosses. They are the authority figures who lead you in one way or another.

TENSION

3 MINUTES

The thing about authority figures is that almost all of them frustrate us at one point or another. And maybe you’ve assumed that being frustrated with your “bosses” is just part of being a teenager.

But honestly, that’s just part of being a human. It’s an everybody thing! All of us wish we were sitting in the boss’ chair of our lives with no one telling us what to do.

And it’s kind of weird because we always have, and always will have, authority figures in our lives. So as we get older, it’s not like authority is a new idea we have to embrace. Authority isn’t new, but as we get older, it tends to bug us in some new ways. There are probably a lot of reasons why, but today we’re going to talk about one.

It’s the idea that we’d do a better job if we were in charge—sitting in the boss’ chair.

Maybe you’ve been there. Maybe you’ve thought…

· “I know the situation better than he does.”

· “I know myself better than my mom knows me.”

· “I’d handle this way better if it were me.”

It’s not that they’re doing a bad job. It’s just that you would be a better boss for you. And I don’t bring that up because you’re wrong. The reality is that sometimes, you’re right. If you were the boss, you possibly would do a better job.

But as for right now, that’s not reality. And that can be frustrating. And that frustration can lead you down a couple of roads. It can lead you to…

· Challenge authority. When we disagree, we point it out. We make a case (sometimes loudly) for why that person shouldn’t be in charge or tell us what do.

· Ignore authority. We don’t make a big deal of it. We just low-key ignore authority. We do our own thing and fly under the radar so nobody knows.

· Rebel against authority. We hate having a boss so much that we don’t just ignore rules, we make a point of going the opposite direction. If someone tells us to sit down, we stand up. If they tell us to stand up, we sit down and glare at them.

No matter what we do, we’re doing it because we think we know what’s best for our lives. But you’ve probably seen how going against authority doesn’t necessarily make things better. It usually makes things more complicated. Instead of having more freedom, we end up with less. Instead of gaining respect, we lose it.

TRUTH

7 MINUTES

Today we’re going to look at a passage found in the book of Hebrews in the New Testament. The interesting thing about this book is that no one knows who wrote it. In all of the other New Testament letters, we have a pretty clear idea of who’s writing. But not Hebrews.

We do know that the intended audience was Jewish people who’d become followers of Jesus. They were men and women who had grown up familiar with Jewish law. In a lot of ways, they were learning an entirely new way of life when they followed Jesus.

Hebrews 13 is full of instructions on how we should manage relationships in our lives—including people under us and people in authority over us. What’s really interesting about this chapter is that many of the instructions indicate that our responses don’t only affect others, they also have a significant impact on us!

The writer of Hebrews encourages us to put ourselves in the shoes of others and focus on how WE would want to be treated in the same situation. Chapter 13 says…

Have confidence in your leaders and submit to their authority… (Hebrews 13:17a NIV).

The first part of this verse is pretty straightforward. We are to have confidence in our leaders and submit to their authority.

Sounds simple. But have you ever thought that having confidence in someone is a choice you can make? Can someone just decide to be confident in someone else? The answer is yes. Another way of thinking about it is to “believe the best” in the person leading you.

· Even if you aren’t sure they’re right.

· Even if you are sure they’re wrong.

· You can choose to believe that people are good (and that they have good intentions).

Then the writer goes on to say “submit” to them, which is another way of saying accept. The challenge to us, in any situation dealing with authority, is to first accept the relationship we’re in—the relationship where they’re the boss and we’re not.

Obviously this is easier said than done. Have you ever been around little kids before? It doesn’t take much time before you realize that little kids don’t like to listen. You can tell them to do something. But if it’s different than what they want to do, they’ll cry, scream, kick, pitch a fit, and roll around on the ground.

We may not behave that way on the outside, but on the inside, this is sometimes our reaction to authority. We want to throw things, hit things, yell at people, and so on. Why? Because we think what they’re doing isn’t fair, and we could do it better.

And all of that may be true, but listen to what the writer of Hebrews says in the second half of the verse:

…They keep watch over you as those who must give an account (Hebrews 13:17b NIV).

In other words, your boss isn’t at the top of the food chain. There is someone over them they must give an account to. Most of us don’t think of authority that way. We think our boss has the ultimate voice and is the ultimate decision maker. But that’s not completely true.

Think about it:

· Coaches and teachers have to answer to the principal.

· The principal answers to parents, the school board, and the superintendent.

· Managers have to answer to their bosses.

· Parents have to answer to their leaders, their families, and even the government.

· Even pastors here at East Cross, I report to Jeff and we both report to the SPRC and the D.S. and the Bishop.

Let’s pause here for a moment and talk about a super-serious issue that’s less-common, and then we’ll come back to common authority issues that most of us face.

Maybe some of you have really been hurt by people in authority. Maybe you or someone you know was even hurt by someone who used their power to abuse, discriminate, or do truly evil things. And this verse isn’t saying that we should allow that to happen. In fact, it’s saying the opposite. It’s saying that all authority must give an account to somebody. So when authority is abusive, there’s nothing wrong with reaching out for help to another person in authority. It could be a parent, small group leader, or pastor. Sometimes that even means the police. If you’re in a situation like that right now, I’m truly sorry. All authority must give an account, so maybe the best thing you could do tonight is have a private conversation with one of our adults.

But this verse is also helpful when we’re talking about normal, everyday bosses in our lives. It’s helpful for us to realize that they all report to somebody. In fact, all bosses have to answer to the ULTIMATE authority—God. That means your authority figures are responsible for giving an account to God for whatever they do. You and I aren’t responsible for pointing out and fixing all of their wrongdoings. Justice doesn’t depend on us—God’s on it!

So to summarize:

· Your authorities have an authority.

· Ultimately, that boss is God. God is paying attention to what they do and don’t do.

· God looks out for your best interest and theirs. And when things are wrong and unfair, God sees it.

· Fixing the problems with your authority figures is God’s job, not yours.

Growing up, I never thought about that. You probably haven’t, either. But it can be a game changer for how you see the people in charge.

And finally, check out what the writer says to close out this verse:

Do this so that their [the authority’s] work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no benefit to you (Hebrews 13:17c NIV).

The writer is telling us to submit to our authority figures in life. Why? Just because it’s the right thing to do? Just because that’s what we’ve been told to do since we were kids? Yes, but not just that. He’s saying that when we make their work—as a boss—a burden, it’s no benefit to US. Which means that when we do submit and make their work a joy, WE benefit! It makes our lives better!

And that’s so true when you think about it!

· When you honor your parents, do they usually give you more or less freedom?

· When you respect your teachers, does it make things harder or easier on you in the long run?

· When you follow your coaches’ lead, are they more likely or less likely to invest in you?

That’s what God wants you to see. When you have a healthy, respectful, honoring relationship with your authorities, it doesn’t just make the job more joyful for them, it makes life better for you. You end up actually getting more freedom, opportunity, and mutual respect.

And that’s the point of this verse. Put simply…

Life is better when you honor the boss.

APPLICATION

2 MINUTES

So how do we do honor our bosses?

1. First, it’s important to know what honor means. It means to show great respect.

2. Then, identify the authority figures in your life—parents, coaches, teachers, and others. Who are the people you answer to?

Ask yourself, “Which ones are easy to submit to?” Pay close attention them and learn from them. Take notes on the way they lead. After all, if you’re not already the boss of someone, you will be someday soon. Why not learn from great bosses on how to be a great boss?

Then, think about which bosses are the most challenging for you. This is where things get difficult. The next time you’re around them, I want you to try to put this verse into practice.

Here’s a couple of ways you can do that:

1. Say something. Pay attention to the way you speak to them. If they’re easy to follow, encourage them with your words. Let them know you respect them and it’s a joy to follow their lead.

If they are difficult to follow, commit to still speaking in a way that shows respect. Maybe that simply means you say “thank you” as you walk out of the classroom or off the field. Maybe it means you ease up on the sarcastic tone or stop rolling your eyes. Just because you don’t say something doesn’t mean they don’t get the message. So commit to speaking in an honoring way, both verbally and non-verbally.

2. Do something. Attitude is everything. Just DO whatever they ask you to do! And do it with joy. You'd be surprised at how impactful a joyful attitude can be, and how much it will make you stand out (in a good way) to your authority! After all, life is better when you honor the boss!

LANDING

1 MINUTE

As you head out today, I want you to imagine how your life would be different if you were a joy to lead. What would that mean for your freedom? Your opportunities? The level of respect you get? Would your life really be better if you decided to honor the boss?

Hey, I get that this isn’t easy. Sometimes we all encounter a “bad boss” whose instruction is unwise, or even ungodly. We’ll talk more about that next week. But for this week, think about the authorities in your life and how you treat them. And instead of being a burden to them, think about what it might look like for you to honor your bosses instead.