Sticks and Stones - People Say the Dumbest Things Chapter 12
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Introduction
Introduction
The Indiscreet Magpie (1400s)
There was a woman who had a caged magpie that could talk, and it told everything that it saw and whatever anyone did.
Now it happened that her husband was saving a fine, large eel in a tub, planning to serve it to a friend for dinner. But one day while he was away, his wife caught the eel, cooked it, and ate it herself.
She planned to claim that an otter had stolen the eel, but when her husband came home, her magpie said, "Master, my mistress ate the eel."
He went to the tub, and not finding the eel, he asked his wife what had happened to it. She started to make an excuse, but he interrupted her, "I know that you ate it,
+w because the magpie told me so!" And he scolded her with angry words.
As soon as the man left, the woman grabbed the magpie and pulled every last feather from its head. "That's your punishment for telling about the eel," she said.
From that time forth, whenever the magpie saw bald-headed person, it would cry out, "You too must have told about the eel!"
Honestly, out of all the chapters in the book this one hits home the worst for me. I love to talk. I talk too much. My mom used to call me Paul Harvey. I guess its genetic, Addison is similar and I’m concerned for her, LOL.
How many times have you said too much and didn’t realize it until it was too late like me? How many times have you said something dumb, because you were not thinking? How many times have you said something you wish you could take back in an instant for any reason?
Not to say I haven’t struggled with gossip like anybody else, but this chapter in particular dug the knife in for me.
Let’s discuss just the very first paragraph real quick as we begin tonight. READ PARAGRAPH 1
James 1
James 1
Call back to James 1:12
12 Blessed is the man who endures temptation; for when he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him.
Why? Because if your name is Russell Wyatt and you can endure the temptation of talking you are more blessed than not.
In seriousness though, let’s keep the context of what James is discussing here and look at verse 18 so see a wonderful blessing of God as we then dig into James 1:18-22
18 Of His own will He brought us forth by the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of His creatures.
19 So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath;
20 for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.
21 Therefore lay aside all filthiness and overflow of wickedness, and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls.
22 But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.
As firstfruits we should act a certain way, right? This is why James says “So then...” It’s as if he is saying, SINCE YOU ARE FIRSTFRUITS, THEN act this way…
What way to act? (We will break these down in more detail as we go.
Swift to Hear
Slow to Speak
Slow to Wrath/Anger
The word wrath in Greek has the idea behind of of “natural impulse” “temperament” It’s the subconscious impulse to allow anger to wash over you and alter your mood. So it’s more than just being “upset”.
Note the other part of the reason for not doing this: “the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” Thus it is worthless to us. In fact, it’s a hindrance. It’s not neutral. It’s very negative.
In contrast then we SHOULD do certain things also:
Lay aside all filthiness and overflow of wickedness (implying anger is part of that).
receive with meekness the implanted word
Which, in contrast to the wrath of man, IS ABLE TO SAVE YOUR SOULS!
BE DOERS NOT HEARERS ONLY.
So it’s important to be swift to hear — but also DO or ACT upon what information you have gathered in your hearing.
Slow to Speak
Slow to Speak
Swift vs. Slow
What Happens when swift speaking occurs?
Rapid Talking without using your brain
Anger (wrathful speech) - Like getting drunk you’re inhibited from making good decisions
Excited talking, from being overstimulated. (Moving to fast to think) - Ever excitedly said something that was supposed to be a secret?
We must learn to control ourselves, especially the tongue, in order to live happier lives and lives that make the Lord happier as well. It is a skill and one that does not come easy!
James recognizes the great difficulty of it when he wrote James 3:2-6
2 For we all stumble in many things. If anyone does not stumble in word, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle the whole body.
3 Indeed, we put bits in horses’ mouths that they may obey us, and we turn their whole body.
4 Look also at ships: although they are so large and are driven by fierce winds, they are turned by a very small rudder wherever the pilot desires.
5 Even so the tongue is a little member and boasts great things. See how great a forest a little fire kindles!
6 And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity. The tongue is so set among our members that it defiles the whole body, and sets on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire by hell.
With something so dangerous right in our faces, would it not be wise to take caution?
Let’s hear some other verses that caution limited use of the tongue so we DON’T say dumb things…
Can I get four volunteers to read? (Ask then give individual verses)
Proverbs 17:27-28
27 He who has knowledge spares his words, And a man of understanding is of a calm spirit.
28 Even a fool is counted wise when he holds his peace; When he shuts his lips, he is considered perceptive.
Proverbs 10:19
19 In the multitude of words sin is not lacking, But he who restrains his lips is wise.
Proverbs 11:12-13 “Holds his peace...”
12 He who is devoid of wisdom despises his neighbor, But a man of understanding holds his peace.
13 A talebearer reveals secrets, But he who is of a faithful spirit conceals a matter.
Proverbs 13:3
3 He who guards his mouth preserves his life, But he who opens wide his lips shall have destruction.
Ecc 5:3
3 For a dream comes through much activity, And a fool’s voice is known by his many words.
Proverbs 18:13
13 He who answers a matter before he hears it, It is folly and shame to him.
It then would be beneficial for us to not say “dumb” things. Or as the Bible would say “Foolish” things. Wouldn’t it?
I’d argue we should strive to control that rudder in spite of it’s seeming impossibility.
Christianity is all about defying our desires.
Consider it. James 1:12-15
12 Blessed is the man who endures temptation; for when he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him.
13 Let no one say when he is tempted, “I am tempted by God”; for God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does He Himself tempt anyone.
14 But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed.
15 Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death.
It’s all about self-control then isn’t it? This entire sinful battle is just as is the tongue.
We must control our tongue as a part of our body as we do our sexual desires.
1 Thessalonians 4:1-8 (read)
Galatians 5:19-26 Fruits of the Flesh and Spirit
“Self-control” but especially Galatians 5:24
24 And those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.
If we don’t control our words, our tongues, our desires then we will regretfully speak things we don’t wish. We will hurt someones feelings, we will say things that we don’t mean, we will say things that are not christ-like, we WILL mess up.
Instead, let’s do what James advises and be “swift to hear.”
Swift to Hear
Swift to Hear
I really like Proverbs 18:13
13 He who answers a matter before he hears it, It is folly and shame to him.
What does this mean?
What are we listening for?
Hear others - QUESTION: What good comes from being a good listener? How do you develop this skill?
Hear ourselves -
Listen to what you are saying, sometimes you think your saying something you’re not. It’s a key to better communication.
Dog Training - My dog doesn’t understand words, but sounds, body language, tone of voice, and tempo helps me communicate with her.
“Think before you speak” - Hear our own thoughts, be thoughtful and intentional in our speech.
Hear God
Similar to hear yourself, let your conscience guide your speech. But if you aren’t listening to it what good will it do you? God molds our conscience to His word and it can guide us when we don’t know the right thing immediately.
Most importantly Heard the Word of directly.
Swift to HEAR the word of God.
Hear/Heed
James 1:21
21 Therefore lay aside all filthiness and overflow of wickedness, and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls.
“Receive the implanted word” Hear it. Heed it. Do it.
If we listen to God instead of speaking hastily, how much heartache can be avoided? What difference in your life would it make?
Let’s look at some of the ways it WOULDN’T Help.
There’s a rather comical list of things in the book that is worth the humor, but more importantly the reminder of how “not thinking” or allowing emotion or other things to dictate your tongue, pen, or typewriter.
(READ BOOK)
What is the alternative?
I was always told, if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all!
The Bible encourages us to have self-control, yes, but we also have to actually DO something.
Be not ONLY hearers, but DOERS as well.
Be not ONLY hearers, but DOERS as well.
This doesn’t mean don’t listen. No, it means LISTEN, but ALSO make sure that you DO the things that are necessary.
Don’t allow your language to betray your loyalties to God.
Keep silent when you must.
But also do the things that you have HEARD in the implanted Word of God.
There are plenty of “nice” things that can be said about people instead. Next week we will focus more on that aspect. But that lesson will be for next week in chapter 13.
Let’s preview it a little with the look at an important verse to consider it all with — because it’s a great way to end this lesson today.
Consider Ephesians 4:17-32
Questions to consider:
What in you opinion is the greater temptation, to speak foolishly or listen to foolishness?
How many words would you guess you say and text each day? Answer on p. 78
What are some good examples of dumb things people have said in the moment in the scriptures?
Peter, denied the Lord.
Matthew 16:21-23
Ananias and Sapphira Acts 5:1-11
Sarah laughing and saying “After I have grown old, shall I have pleasure, my lord being old also?” Genesis 18:12
Zechariah doubting and questioning the angel Gabriel in Luke 1:13-22
Joseph telling his dream to his brothers.