Marriage, Jesus and the Church

Preparing the sermon

Every Christian can be inspired to be ready for the coming of Jesus in awe by recognizing Jesus as the bridegroom(how its present throughout the bible), us as the bride (look at the evidence), our wedding (Jewish Practices overlapped with us), and what we need to do (be ready).

Research:

Biblical Examples:

Isaac and Rebecca

Jacob and Rachel

Passages with Jesus as the Bridegroom

John the Baptist - Bridegroom

Jesus - Preparing a room

Prophecies of Return

Jesus as the Bridegroom

Husbands, love your wives: Jesus loved the church, and paid for her with his own blood - literally dying for her - Eph 5:25, Rom 5:8,

Key Passage:

Ephesians 5:22–33 ESV

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

Sermon Outline:

Greetings:

Prayer:

Introduction to Topic:

“Eph 5:31-32”

Overview of Structure: So tonight, I want to share with you some of the different steps in a traditional Jewish Wedding, and how our Lord and Savior is doing the same things for us; then I’d love to finish with a practical step of how to put this into practice in your own life.

Transition: Traditional Jewish weddings are so beautiful, but they’re different than what we’re used to; so I’d love to first give a quick overview of the whole process, and then we’ll get into each step.

Part 1: Jewish Marriage Practices and the Church

Quick Overview of Jewish Weddings:

So in Traditional Jewish Weddings, the groom’s father chooses who his son will marry; with all his wisdom, he chooses the very best person he can - according to their culture and customs, that would be best for his son. Sometimes this was done with a matchmaker called a Shadkan, who was given authority to arrange a good marriave. Then, having chosen who the bride will be, the bride agreed to be married to the groom, and the Father negotiates a price to pay the family and the Groom’s Father, and the Groom would give two gifts to the Bride and her family, called a Mohar and Matan. Then, the two are immersed in water, called a Mikvah, which symbolized spiritual cleansing. After being immersed in water, the two become betrothed to mary, under the Huppah (which is a white canopy), and the bride and groom sign a legally binding betrothal contract - which required a divorce to annul. There under the Huppah, they sign this contract, and the groom gives his wife the Matan, and the two share a cup of wine together to seal their vows. Then the two seperate, to prepare for the marriage, this seperation lasts about a year, where they’re legally betrothed, but haven’t been intimately together yet.

During the this betrothal period, when the two are seperated, the groom focuses on preparing the house - a place fo the two to be together; while the bride prepared for the wedding - making her wedding dress. This period lasted roughly a year, but the father of the groom had to approve the room, the place the groom was preparing for the bride - and without his approval, the groom couldn’t get his bride. So no one knew exactly when the father would approve the room, and tell his son to go get his bride - so the bride had to be ready, she knew it was roughly this time year - but the actual day and hour, she didn’t know. But she would get her wedding dress ready, and lamps ready in case the groom came in the middle of the night.

But when the father said to get her, the Nissun began, which was the loud, boystorus, ceremony, where the groom goes to the brides house, with the groomsmen calling, and shouting, and the groom would carry his bride home; they would be under the Huppah one last time to recite a blessing over the wine, and say their final vows, and then consumate the marriage - during this time, there was a wedding feast which lasted a week - of eating, drinking, and dancing, and music. After the wedding feast, the two would start their liveds together.

Doesn’t some of that sound familiar? It sounds like Jesus and the Church! I’m so excited! Jesus is doing the same thing for us, His church, His Bride; so Im so happy to share that with you bit by bit; We see the first half of the ceremony with Abraham in Genesis 24:2-61, which is a long passage, but I’ll ask Bruno to read it by himself to save a bit of time. (Bruno reads Passage)

Father chooses

Isn’t that beautiful? So the First step in a Jewish wedding, is that the father chooses whom his son will marry; we see this with Abraham in Genesis 24:2-61, we saw that with Abraham sending his servant; but you see, we were also chosen; like Rebecca who was chosen before she knew she was being chosen; God chose us -

In Romans 8:29, Paul says, “ For whom oHe foreknew, pHe also predestined qto be conformed to the image of His Son, rthat He might be the firstborn among many brethren. 30 Moreover whom He predestined, these He also scalled; whom He called, these He also tjustified; and whom He justified, these He also uglorified

And Jesus says, “You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear frut - fruit that will last - and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you. (John 15:16)

Again, in John 6:44, “No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them, and I will raise them up at the last day.”

You see, before the foundation of the world, God chose us, and predestined us to be adopted as sons - we were chosen in Christ Jesus to be conformed to His image since before the world began! We were chosen; like rebecca. Like rebecca, before she new she was being chosen; we were chosen to be conformed to the image of Jesus - and become a member His Church, His Bride before the foundation of the world.

The bible says that once we were dead in our tresspasses in sins, we were not a part of Israel, God’s chosen people - so we were not included in his covenants - we didn’t know God, and we lived in sin - we were worthy of wrath by our very nature. But God foreknew us before the foundation of the world, before a single moment of our life happened, before we took our first breath, God foreknew us, and had chosen us in Christ Jesus to be conformed to the image of His son.

Amen, aleluia… Oh God is Good.. pause

Purchase 1: Mohar

The next portion is the Mohar, which is the purchasing price fo the wife - the price that purchased her from her father, and her father’s family; so that she belonged to the groom and his family. In those days, women contributed significantly to the father’s house, helping around the house, and around the property - doing work that had a large value for her father’s family, and the mohar was paid to also offset that value; but when the mohar was paid, the daughter no longer belonged to her father, but to the groom and his family; we see this with Jacob and Rachel, in Genesis 29. When Jacob traveled, and found his relatives, and saw Rachel and fell in love with her; which is a beautiful passage, I’ll read verses 9-12; “While he was still speaking with them, Rachel came with her father's sheep, for she was a shepherdess. 10 Now as soon as Jacob saw Rachel the daughter of Laban his mother's brother, and the sheep of Laban his mother's brother, Jacob came near and rolled the stone from the well's mouth and watered the flock of Laban his mother's brother. 11 Then Jacob kissed Rachel and wept aloud. 12 And Jacob told Rachel that he was her father's kinsman, and that he was Rebekah's son, and she ran and told her father.”

Then Jacob and Laban celebrated because they were relatives, and we see in verse 15, Genesis 26:15, Then Laban said to Jacob, “Because you are my kinsman, should you therefore serve me for nothing? Tell me, what shall your wages be?” 16 Now Laban had two daughters. The name of the older was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel. 17 Leah's eyes were weak,[a] but Rachel was beautiful in form and appearance. 18 Jacob loved Rachel. And he said, “I will serve you seven years for your younger daughter Rachel.” 19 Laban said, “It is better that I give her to you than that I should give her to any other man; stay with me.” 20 So Jacob served seven years for Rachel, and they seemed to him but a few days because of the love he had for her.

So when Jacob fell in love with Rachel, he didn’t just date her and ask her to marry her like we would in our culture. He was separated from his family, and might not have had enough with him, or even at all to pay the Mohar for Rachel - so he had to work for Laban, Rachel’s father enough that would constitute the value of Rachel’s Mohar, which was 7 years of labor. And we know as the story progresses, that Laban cheated Jacob, and gave him Leah instead of Rachel, saying that in his country, you never marry the younger daughter before the oldest so he had to give Leah before Rachel; so Jacob had to work another 7 years for Rachel - whom he was in love with. But I want to highlight the mohar, that price, he had to pay for Rachel and Leah, he couldn’t just marry her because he loved her, he had to pay her father the bride price, the Mohar.

And similar to this, we too were purchased by Jesus!

Before Jesus purchased us, we belonged to satan. We see this in John 8:44, when Jesus is talking to the pharisees, who are trying to kill him, saying, “You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father’s desires. He was a murerer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.” Why did Jesus say, “You belong to your father, the devil?” Part o this, is that when Adam and Eve sinned, they rebelled against God, in disobedience, they broke God’s laws, and through them, sin entered the world and death reigned. From that point on, there was murder in the world with Cain murdering Abel, there was pride, and jealousy, and hate, and murder, and sexual immorality, and all kinds of filth - all of it worthy of the Judgement. But that prideful attitude, that rebelion towards God, that sinfulness is part of satan’s nature - so our sinful nature reproduced satan’s sinful nature - that’s what the Paul calls the “Old man” or the “flesh”, its our sinful nature, and who we were before Jesus. We were children of wrath, deserving judgement.

But instead of judging us immediately, where all humanity would end up in hell, since we’ve all sinned, and lied, stolen, etc. and the wages of sin is death, we deserved it; but instead of that, God so loved us, that He sent Jesus, His only son, into the world, to live as a man with our sinful nature, but to never sin - so that He could die in our place, paying the price of our sins; so that however would believe in him, might never perish, but have eternal life.

But the bible says we were purchased at a price, in 1 Corinthians 6:20, it says, talking about fleeing from sexual immorality, which is a sin against our own bodies, Paul says, “Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? qYou are not your own, 20 rfor you were bought with a price. sSo glorify God in your body.” And that price is not gold and silver, in 1 Peter 1:18-20, Peter says, “Knowing that you were not redeemed with corruptible things, like silver or gold, from your aimless conduct received by tradition from your fathers, but with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot.”

So you weren’t purchased with silver or gold, with things that are very valuable here on earth, no, you were purchased by the most valuable substance in the history of heaven and earth, and in all creation in all time - we were purchased by the blood of the Son of the Living God - Jesus; Who was with God in the beginning, and through whom all things were made; The Son of God, who is in himself God; We were purchased by His blood; On the cross, He willingly laid down His life for us.

I was thinking about that the other day, have you ever imagined dying for someone? Seeing someone who’s about to die, about to be killed, about to be tortured (that’s who we were), and saying no, no, no, don’t kill him; don’t torture him.. do that to me, I’ll die in his place, I’ll take his punishment, I’ll put it on my body, and I’ll die for him. That’s deeply deeply personal, he gave up his life for you, but that was a very very very personal thing - he died for you.

And by His blood, he purchased us. And we were born again! We were adopted and given the right to be called, Children of God; and our sinful nature, our old-man, the flesh, the part that reproduced satan’s nature; the bible says, that that was crucified - past tense, it already happened, it was crucified with Jesus on the cross. When we believed, when we converted and were born again, our sins, and our sinful nature went through the Holy Spirit, back to the hill, of Calvary, to be placed on the body of Christ, 2000 years ago; and His blood, spilled from the cross, paid for our sins, for my sins, for your sins, and purchased us, so that we are not our own, we were bought at a price; we were bought at a price, we are not our own. We were purchased - how Glorious is the son of God; how beautiful is His love.

Brothers and sisters, if you can accept it, that was our Mohar; that was our purchasing price. Jacob worked 7 years for Leah, and then 7 more years for Rachel; to pay for their Mohars, but Jesus, came to the world as a man, and lived sinlessly as a man, to willingly give up his life, deprived of food and water, to have his beard torn, and a crown of thorns placed on his head, beaten, whipped to the point where his back was flayed open, and carry a heavy wooden cross to Gulgatha, to Calvary, to let roman guards nail his hands to the wood, and nail his feet, with his back that was flailed open, rub against the wood; and to be lifted up from the ground (though he could have stopped it at any time); and while on the cross, our sins went on his body; on the cross, He was paying for our sins, and He died - and His blood that flowed from the body of the Son of God, is what purchased us. Jacob worked 14 years for Rachel; Jesus gave up his life on the cross for HIs bride - the Church. Praise God.

I’ll have to move a bit quickly with the rest, but I wanted to highlight the cross - because It’s so powerful!

Our Agreeing

As we saw in Rebecca, she was chosen, but she had to agree - “Will you go this man.” And in a similar way, though we were predestined and chosen, we also have to accept. When we were called to convert, we had to accept that call - to accept Jesus, to accept His death on the cross in our behalf, we had to accepted;

Mikvah

but then, in the Traditional Jewish Wedding, Before the betrothal starts, both the groom and the bride, immerse themselves in water, to symbolize spiritual cleansing; and betrothal comes ater this; but the immersion is a baptism.

Jesus, before he started his ministry, was baptized by John the Baptist in the Jordan river, right before being led into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. And as he was baptized, we are also baptized to symbolize our death with Jesus on the cross, and our resurrection with Him. As it is written, Mark 16:16, Jesus said, “ Whoever believes and is xbaptized ywill be saved, but zwhoever wdoes not believe will be condemned.”

So Jesus was baptized, like a Mikvah; and we were also baptised, every one of us, like a Mikvah. and in the traditional Jewish Ceremony, after the baptism (Mikvah), the two would go to a betrothal ceremony, where the two would stand under a Huppa, and sign the betrothal contract, which was as legally binding as a Marriage; there the couple says their vows, and the groom gives his bride a gift called the Matan, and then the two seperate for a year. The Groom goes to his father’s house to prepare a room to receive the bride, and where they will live together; and the bride prepares her wedding ring, and we see that with Jesus and the Church - it’s beautiful!

We see this with Joseph and Mary; when Mary was pregnant with Jesus, she was pregnant during their engagement. It’d be hard for any of us to believe that our fiance was pregnant without being unfaithful; and thinking she was unfaithful, he had in mind to divorce her quietly, as Matthew 1:19, says. So engagement was as serious and legally binding as marriage.

Gift to Wife: Matann

Gift to Wife: Matan

Right after the Mikvah, which is a baptism, the groom and the bride go under a Huppa, So, we were chosen by God, we were called, and accepted the call; we were baptized in what resembles a Mikvah, and Jesus paid our price, resembling a Mohar that we are no longer our own, we belong to Him;

Gifts of the Holy Spirit (Gave gifts to many)

Gifts of Ministry (to prepare God’s people for the good works that God prepared for them in advance to do)

Rebecca was chosen, but she was also purchased - we see in Genesis 24:52,

“And the servant brought out jewelry of silver and of gold, and garments, and gave them to Rebekah. He also gave to her brother and to her mother costly ornaments.” These gifts are usually given to the father, but we see no mention of Rebecca’s father during this whole event - which is highly unusual in their patriachical society that emphasized the role and authority of the father in these matters, which allows us to infer that maybe something happened to her father, so that he wasn’t present when she was asked to be married, so in his absence, the servant gave gifts to Rebecca, to her mother, and brothers. This was the Mohar, which purchased Rebecca

Engagement

Lord’s Supper (shared cup of wine)

Parting gift

Holy Spirit (Guaranteeing our inheritance)

Preparation

Bridegroom: Preparing Room (Jesus going to prepare a place)

(Explains Room)

Bride: Prepares Wedding Dress (Church preparing their wedding clothes)

Righteous acts of the Saints

Father’s Go-Ahead

Room is ready when Father say’s so, not groom - therefore no one knows except the Father (Jesus)

Bridegroom Procession

Jesus coming (Parable)

Jesus coming (prophecy)

Getting Ready - (have to be ready)

Taking to Wedding Banquet

(Parable of the 10 virgins)

(Prophecy of Jesus)

Wedding Banquet

Life Together

Part 2: Call to Action

Call to Holiness