Fellowship in Disagreement Part 2

So last week was a little introduction. This week we get more practical. We have objective unity in Christ because of the gospel.

We are a body, with feet, hands, eyes, and mouths. According to 1 Corinthians 12:24, God put us all together.

We are a household, a family, as Paul related to Timothy. The church is the household of God, the pillar and buttress of the truth (1 Tim. 3:15).

Peter says we’re like a spiritual house, and each one of us are like living stones, with Jesus Christ as the cornerstone that holds us all together.

He says we - all of us, no matter where we come from - are “a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession.”

The metaphors of unity are pervasive in the church. However, we don’t always agree on everything. That’s the simple reality. I sent out an email last week to some folks asking for some samples of opinions that Christians might disagree on, especially ones related to our current cultural moment. Here are some:

The coronavirus is all overblown vs. the coronavirus is a real, dangerous threat.

We should all be wearing masks vs. we should all be removing our masks

Donald Trump is a national hero vs. Donald Trump is the devil

No Christians should ever protest vs. Christians have a right to protest

America doesn’t have a racism problem vs. America has a huge problem with racism.

Now, if you want me to weigh in on these opinions, sorry. That’s not what we’re doing this morning. What we’re actually going to do is look at how Scripture calls us to live in unity with those with different opinions. Romans 14.

We’re going to make 5 commitments from these verses.

Verse 1: “As for the one who is weak in faith, welcome him, but not to quarrel over opinions.”

Opinions. These are not doctrines. He’s not talking about that which the Scriptures clearly teach. Rather, he’s speaking about conclusions we draw from our own reasoning. Paul says from the get go that there are such things as opinions that are not taught in Scripture that we must not quarrel about.

There are such things as “opinions.” These opinions create potential for division.

Verse 2: “One person believes he may eat anything, while the weak person eats only vegetables.” Christians saved out of a Jewish background would have had a hard time adapted to the reality of no dietary laws. So they only ate vegetables. Others, understanding freedom in the gospel, ate anything. They came to different conclusions about how they should live.

Commitment # 1: I will not be surprised that people have different opinions.

This is an example of the ways our backgrounds, experiences, and cultures shape our consciences, and often our consciences disagree.

Think of Christ’s disciples. You have Matthew the tax collector and Simon the Zealot. These guys, politically speaking, were further apart than today’s democrats and republicans. One writer, describing their relationship, wrote: “Matthew had worked for the government; Simon wanted to burn it down. An Occupy Wall Street protestor and a Tea Party patriot would have more in common than these two.”

Remember Colossians? He mentions Jews, Greeks, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free. Now, their unity has been purchased by Christ. But I bet they have different opinions about things.

Let’s not be surprised that in our efforts to please the Lord, we will come to different conclusions. Friends, let’s not be deathly afraid of different opinions. Let’s not demonize dissenters. Let’s realize that different opinions actually do exist.

Commitment # 2: I will not quarrel, despise, or judge people who disagree with me.

There are three words that describe what we are not to do with people who have differing opinions.

Quarrel. Engagement in verbal conflict because of differing viewpoints. Words.

Despise. This is an attitude that belittles, dismisses, or thinks such a viewpoint is utterly ridiculous.

Judge. To judge, in this context, is to act like the moral authority to make declarative evaluations about others opinions.

Remember, he’s talking about believers who are united in the gospel. Matters of opinion. Can we discuss them? Yes, we absolutely must! Should we quarrel? No. Despise? No. Judge? No. Rather, what are we to do with those who differ from us?

“Welcome them.” Acts 28:2 “The native people showed us unusual kindness, for they kindled a fire and welcomed us all, because it had begun to rain and was cold. Unusual kindness.

Commitment # 3: I will leave the final evaluation in the Lord’s hands.

Verse 4: “Who are you to pass judgment on the servant of another? It is before his own master that he stands or falls. And he will be upheld, for the Lord is able to make him stand.”

Here’s a rhetorical question: “Who are you to pass judgment?” The implication, of course, is that it’s not our role. That’s not our lane. We are not omniscient, and we are not the master.

Imagine you own a business and you hire someone to do a job. Then, imagine I show up and start critiquing the way the guy you hired is doing the job. I wish he did it this way. I think he should do it that way.

Here’s the problem: I’m not the boss. I don’t get to make that evaluation. The boss ultimately will determine if the guy has done the job according to the standards he’s set.

This is what Paul is saying. Jesus is the master. We are his servants. And we do not have the omniscience nor the position to pass judgment on one another. Jesus will one day judge the hearts of all men - that’s not our job.

When someone disagrees with you, if the issue is not clear biblical doctrine, but is rather in the realm of personal opinion, we do not quarrel, despise, or judge - rather we welcome them and leave the evaluation in the Lord’s hands.

Commitment # 4: I will not pressure others to violate their consciences.

V 5: “One person esteems one day as better than another, while another esteems all days alike. Each one should be fully convinced in his own mind.”

The principle that Paul is laying down here is that each person needs to do what they are “fully convinced” is right.

Verse 23: “But whoever has doubts is condemned if he eats, because the eating is not from faith. For whatever does not proceed from faith is sin.”

Again, Christians ought to seek to honor the Lord with every decision they make. If they doubt they can do something to God’s glory, they shouldn’t do it. Simple.

Back when I was a youth pastor I was approached by a girl who told me she really enjoyed watching horror movies, but was beginning to wonder if they were helpful for her walk with the Lord. I asked her, “So, you’re doubting whether these things help you treasure Christ, love the gospel, and walk in obedience?” She said “Yeah.” I have a simple solution. Stop.

I could tell she thought I was being a bit too serious, perhaps even legalistic. But I pointed out the principles here: “Each one should be fully convinced in his own mind.” And “But whoever has doubts is condemned if he eats, because the eating is not from faith.”

What this means is that we should not pressure others to do things they are convinced are wrong. Take mask-wearing, for instance. Imagine a Christian believes it is his duty to wear a mask for the protection of people around them, and another thinks the opposite - he needs to resist government overreach by not wearing a mask. Both are convinced in their own mind.

These two Christians should not try to force the other into agreement.

Take protesting. One is convinced protesting racial injustice is right. Another is convinced protesting racial injustice is wrong. Scripture gives principles for how to live, and we can come to different conclusions here.

We should not be surprised at different opinions. We won’t quarrel over them. We’ll let Christ be the judge. We don’t try to coerce people into our opinions.

Commitment # 5: I will assume the best motives.

Verse 6:The one who observes the day, observes it in honor of the Lord. The one who eats, eats in honor of the Lord, since he gives thanks to God, while the one who abstains, abstains in honor of the Lord and gives thanks to God.”

Did you know that trust is a property of love? Remember, “love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things” (1 Cor. 13:7).

In our world, social media is like a loud party where you hear bits and pieces of everyone’s conversation. Some people are really struggling with others right now. Don’t they understand the issues? Don’t they get it? Why aren’t they doing anything?

It is unloving to assume that because someone is doing the same things you have chosen to do that they are bad or wrong. One can observe a day in honor of the Lord; one can not. One can eat or abstain in honor of the Lord. One can wear a mask or not in honor of the Lord. One can post of social media or not in honor of the Lord. One can protest or not in honor of the Lord. One can vote one way or not in honor of the Lord.

I’m not saying that everyone is right. Paul’s not teaching moral relativism. He’s saying that consciences are different, God is the judge, and rather than assume the worst, assume people are trying to honor the Lord.

You’ve probably been told: “Never assume motives.” I prefer we adjust that. “Never assume bad motives.” Church, instead, you should assume good motives. Assume people are seeking to honor the Lord with their decisions.

There are issues we will not budge on. They are not opinions. They’re not up for debate. They’re revealed to us by God. But not every issue is that kind of issue. There are opinions. How do we handle them?

I will not be surprised that people have different opinions.

I will not quarrel, despise, or judge people who disagree with me.

I will leave the final evaluation in the Lord’s hands.

I will not pressure others to conform to my conscience.

I will assume the best motives.

Mark Dever, a pastor in Washington D.C., who is always having to speak to strong political opinions in the church since much of his membership is directly involved with our government, likes to say: “The Christ we share is more important than the politics we don’t.”