Wedding

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1 Corinthians 13:4–8 (NIV84): 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails.
The marriage relationship is the most intimate and closest of human relationships. The Bible often describes it as “two becoming one flesh” This is not just a reference to the physical union of a man and a woman but close emotional and informational connection that they have and which is welded together even closer over time. It amazes us how two distinct individuals who may not have known each other from Adam can meet, greet, and somehow decide that “this is the one” whom they want to get to know better. At some point in the dating scenario they decide that they would like to become one in marriage. During that time prior to the wedding, there is the exchange of information and activities that convinces them that this is the person they want to be completely open and honest with and hide nothing from them. It is the official start of that relationship that we mark and celebrate today.
It all can sound so wonderful. Being united is a status that is desired and praised. We are proud to be citizens of the “United” State. Jesus prayed that all of his believers be one as he and the Father are one. St. Paul urges that Christians be united. If the atoms that make up our bodies were not united, that would be very bad.
But being united has a certain amount of inherent risk. Many people hide their true selves from others because they fear that their sins will prevent them from being loved and accepted. Even though God had created Adam and Eve to be united with him, once they sinned they hid from him out of fear.
Stephen, Ellisa, when you open up to each other and share; you run the risk of being exposed. Your new spouse will experience you as no other person does. You will notice each other’s sins, failings, weaknesses, and what your spouse hides from others. By being one, this is unavoidable. But should not be feared. Because God equips you (and all Christians) with a gift that cements otherwise fractured relationships. It is the attribute that God has toward sinners and which he demonstrates in the plan of salvation. When Adam and Eve sinned and tried to hide from God, he sought them out that very day and in love warned them of the consequences of their sin but also promised to send the seed of the woman to destroy the power of the devil. In love God would continue to preserve and to protect his creation and reinforce his promise to save them. In love Jesus came into the world (which we celebrate this time of year)and gave himself for us that we might be reunited with God.
The Bible’s word for that love is agape. It is the word used by St Paul in our text. And although he is not specifically limiting this love to that between a husband and wife, he is describing the love that you will express with each other intimately even though you know each others deepest flaws. It describes how in response to God’s love for you, you will act toward each other and feel for each other all the days of your lives.
These are certainly characteristics that we favor in seeing in other people and the way in which we want to act toward others. Our sinful nature may tempt us to be less than loving to those who have hurt us. As noted earlier, your spouse has the most ammunition when it comes to hurting you because your spouse will know you intimately and better than anyone else your weaknesses. But do not let that keep you from being open and honest with each other.
In your premarital counseling I remarked that strong, vitalized couples (which you are) will often score very highly in a variety of areas. But there is one area that they often do not perform well on. It is known as “Realistic expectations”. Those committing to getting married and newly weds believe that they will never love their partner more and that their partner will never, ever, do anything to hurt them and they will never, ever have an argument, disappoint each other, or cause pain to their loved one. It is called looking at life with “rose colored glasses”. Well, I admire such optimism but just a reminder that this doesn’t always happen as noted above. If or when it does happen, remember the Bible verse you have chosen for today and remember how God is the one who has shown us that love and he is the one who gives that love to you so that you can express it to each other on the deepest level. Conclude as an exhortation.
1 Corinthians 13:4–7 NIV84
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
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