06AM March 19 Exodus 20_12
March 19, 2006—Morning Worship
Honoring Your Parents
Simple Answers to Difficult Questions
Exodus 20:12
Intro: In studying the 10 Commandments, we find that: the 1st Commandment guards the unity of God w/the prohibition of the worship of any god except Jehovah. The 2nd Commandment guards the holiness of God, in that He alone is the object of our worship. The 3rd Commandment guards the deity of God by keeping His name from profane use. The 4th Commandment guards a day specifically set aside for the worship God. And the 5th Commandment guards the ordained authority given by God.
The 1st 4 Commandments all deal directly w/our response to God. But beginning w/the 5th Commandment, all those that follow deal directly w/our response to one another. So, the 1st 4 deal w/Man’s relationship w/God & the last 6 deal w/Man’s relationship w/his fellow man.
It’s interesting to me that when God turns His attention to man’s relationship w/man that the 1st thing He thinks about is that we honor our parents. In all actuality, God is continuing His train of thought about order & authority. You see, parents are God's instruments to teach & train children. God's authority belongs to the parents. & our duty toward our parents is detailed in this 5th Commandment.
This is not an arbitrary principle. The family, human government, & the church are 3 God-ordained institutions for the good of human society. & the family is the foundation of society, & submission to authority begins in the family. Children have 2 responsibilities regarding their parents: (1) is a temporary responsibility that requires obedience & (2) is a timeless responsibility that requires respect. One is passing while the other is permanent.
The 5th Commandment is found in…
Exodus 20 12 "Honor your father & your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you.
- Now someone may say, “Pastor Dennis, that’s OT teaching written to the children of Israel before they even came to the Promised Land. How can that affect my life today?”
- Well, the Apostle Paul quoted this verse in Ephesians 6 & even gave commentary on it, relating it to the people of his day & helping us to see its relevance in our day. Paul wrote in Ephesians 6 1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 "Honor your father & mother," which is the 1st commandment w/promise: 3 "that it may be well w/you & you may live long on the earth."
- IOW, if you follow the Lord’s directions; if you follow His prescription for life, then you will be blessed!
- Now you may say, “Well that’s not much information – ‘Honor your father & mother’! What does that mean? What does that involve? How do we do that?”
- From the text let’s find simple answers to those difficult questions…
1. What does it mean to “honor your parents?”-----The Admonition of the Text
- Notice 1st of all that it’s…
A. The General principle. (v. 12a) 12a “Honor your father & your mother….”
- Paul writes in Ephesians 6 that, “…this is right.”
- IOW, the general principle given in OT is upheld in the NT as being pleasing to God.
- Many times we think that OT commands are not for us b/c we are under grace.
- But Jesus said in Matthew 5 17 "Do not think that I came to destroy the Law or the Prophets. I did not come to destroy but to fulfill.
- So the general principle remains intact. & the 2 commandments of Jesus: to love God supremely & to love others sacrificially, are only a summation of the 10 Commandments not a replacement code of conduct; it’s a simplified code of conduct.
- So then, the general principle is that we are to feel & to act in a loving manner, in a manner becoming to our superiors.
- This is the will of God. The very nature of the relationship w/parents & the moral order of society depend on submission to authority.
- Parents are representatives of God; they are responsible to God; they are a reflection of God.
- Therefore, they are to be honored, upheld, esteemed & obeyed.
- We’ll move into that a little more in depth later in the message.
- But notice w/me in v. 12, not only the general principle but also…
B. The Specific reward. (v. 12b) 12b “…that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you.”
1. Children who honor & obey their parents are promised prolonged days.
- Now God already knows the number of your days. So what does this promise of prolonged days mean?
- It means that, as you follow the Lord’s leadership, you will be walking by faith in Him & not by sight; you will be following Him according to His plan & God blesses that!
- BTW, you do know that the Bible says that most of Mankind is given 70 yrs.
- But your days can be cut off by your willful disobedience!
- It’s not in God’s plan for everyone to live 70 yrs. but if you follow Him, your life will be blessed w/prolonged days.
2. Children who honor their parents are promised prosperous days.
- Your days following God will not be average days. Your life will make a difference!
- Your life will have an impact! Your life will have accomplishments to display!
- Your life will be a glory to God! & through faithfulness to the general principles of God’s word…
3. Children who honor their parents are promised pleasurable days.
- Now that does not mean that everything in your life will go smoothly.
- It does not mean that you will never experience problems in life.
- But it does mean that your life’s experience will not be burdensome. Many believers go through extremely difficult days & yet they do so w/joy in their hearts b/c of God’s grace!
- Your life may not be a rose garden – but it will be a joyous experience of grace!
- So what does it mean to honor your parents? It means you follow the general principles of Scripture & receive a specific reward from God.
- But maybe that’s still not enough information for you. Maybe you’re still asking…
2. What is involved in honoring your parents? -----The Analysis of the Text
- It’s clear from a general reading of the text that there are 3 participants in the v. 12; 1st is God (& we’ve briefly talked about His role), 2nd the verse speaks of parents & 3rd the verse speaks of…
A. The Children.
- The analysis of the text deals first w/the children addressed w/the command.
- Often we view the Bible's mandates strictly in the sense of adults.
- But children of all ages also have responsibility to heed the words of Scripture.
- Children who disrespect, disobey, & despise their parents will be judged by God.
- He is the One who decides whose days are prolonged. He is the One who grants His grace on those who are obedient & He is the One who visits punishment & trial & problem & affliction on those who are disobedient.
- Notice the 4 uses of the word “your” in v. 12 "Honor your father & your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you.
- That makes what we do very personal doesn’t it?
- This helps us to see that it applies directly to us! We are responsible before God to follow His word & His will & it’s up to us to obey this command.
- & contemplate for just a moment on the fact that we are all someone’s child. & that means that we are to honor our own parents as an act of worship before God.
- It’s not just limited to small, young children & youth! It’s all of us & we’ll speak more to that subject later in the message.
- But this verse also speaks of…
B. The Parents. (v. 12a) 12 “Honor your father & your mother….”
- The responsibilities are well noted in the text. The word "honor" commands a great deal of responsibility on behalf of the child.
- But if you look at the original language, the word literally means “to make honorable.”
- It means that parents bear the responsibility to be honorable!
- The reasoning for this command is simple. If children do not honor their parents; a generation of unruly & ungodly people will arise.
- Now does that sound familiar in the society in which we live today?
- Is that applicable to the times in which we live?
- In the 19th century, man became such a critical thinker, that he thought God out of existence. That was revived again in the 1960’s “God is dead” movement.
- That spawned a generation of people who grew up w/o the influence of church.
- & that has lead to the vast majority of Americans today who have little or no use for the things of God b/c they don’t see God as someone to be trusted!
- Parents have a grave responsibility to be honorable for their children’s sake!
- & that leads us to think of…
C. The Requirements. ()
- A child who never honors his parents is in danger much more often than not.
- In Moses' day one of the dangers of disobeying your parents probably included wandering off into foreign territory or getting lost.
- Or if a child were to play w/a snake in the desert – despite parental warnings, he or she might encounter a poisonous death. The list could go on & on.
[But let me remind you of what would happen in Moses’ day to a rebellious child. If the child’s parents had taught them well, & yet he still rebelled; if they had practiced prayer for their child, & yet he still rebelled; if they had exercised discipline in the home, & yet he still rebelled; if they had extended tender love & affection, & yet he still rebelled; & if they had used tough love & punishment, & yet he still rebelled; if the parents had done all they knew to do, & yet he still rebelled…
Deuteronomy 21 19 then his father & his mother shall take hold of him & bring him out to the elders of his city, to the gate of his city. 20 & they shall say to the elders of his city, This son of ours is stubborn & rebellious; he will not obey our voice; he is a glutton & a drunkard. 21 Then all the men of his city shall stone him to death w/stones; so you shall put away the evil from among you, & all Israel shall hear & fear.]
- I’d just bet they didn’t have to do that too many times – huh?
- But in our culture, we also see the deadly effects of not honoring your parents.
- Increases in suicide rates, drug use, sexually transmitted diseases, & many more dangers await those who go their own way rather than honoring their parents' instructions.
- God promised the Israelites who honored their parents a long life in the Promised Land.
- We too can experience a similar blessing through obedience to this command.
- So what is involved in honoring your parents? It is God working through the children to heed His word; it is God working through the parents to be His representatives; & it’s God’s grace at work in both to accomplish His will.
- But maybe you are saying, even if all that is true…
3. How do you honor your parents? -----The Application of the Text
- 1st in the text is the implication…
A. Of Obedience.
- & this command holds implications for parents as well as for children.
- Parents should be worthy of honor.
- They must learn to listen to, to love, to lead, & to wisely lecture their children.
- They do so by precepts & promises & patterns, & by this, parents can effectively bring up their children in the nurture & admonition of the Lord.
- There is an implication here for very young children, & it’s a great verse to teach to toddlers.
- B/c children should learn the importance of obedience early in life.
- & even in adolescence, children are required to obey their parents, even though they are also becoming increasingly responsible for their own choices.
- But they must obey their parents!
- I know – those teenage years are difficult – as I’ve said before, it is amazing how much smarter my dad got, the older I became!
- When I was younger & thought I knew it all, my parents seemed to be so out of it!
- & even if your parents seem to be “out of touch” you’re still responsible to obey them!
- & if you don’t – there will be consequences for your sin.
- Yes, I said sin! B/c you are not really rebelling against the authority of your parents. In reality you are rebelling against the authority of God which He placed in your parents.
- So when you refuse to obey your parents – you literally are refusing to obey God & there will be consequences for your sin of rebellion!
- In our culture, we don’t take rebellious children out & stone them to death, (although I believe that if that happened we’d have fewer rebellious children)!
- But in our Christian culture, we are to follow the word of God & to pray & to ask that God’s will be done for them that they may come to have a healthy spiritual reverence & awe for God.
2 Timothy 3 1 But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: 2 For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, 3 unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, w/o self-control, brutal, despisers of good, 4 traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 having a form of godliness but denying its power. & from such people turn away!
- Did you notice how far up on the list “disobedient to parents” was? It’s listed before many other sins, emphasizing that it is more grievous.
- Obedience to parents actually demonstrates your obedience to God!
- So the 1st implication of the text is obedience & the 2nd implication is that…
B. Of Respect.
- There does come a time, as Scripture indicates, for children to move away from the rules of their parents' home & to begin their own home.
Genesis 2 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father & mother & be joined to his wife, & they shall become one flesh.
- Now by that, I don’t mean to indicate that the Bible declares that to be the only acceptable time when a child leaves home.
- Especially in our culture, it’s more normal for a child to leave the home shortly after reaching adulthood.
- But even though they are no longer under their parents’ roofs & under their parents’ rules, even in adulthood, children are required to show respect to their parents.
- Webster’s New World College Dictionary defines “respect” as: a feeling of high regard, honor or esteem; or consideration courteously expressed.
- IOW you treat them w/the high honor & regard they deserve as representatives of God’s authority & representatives of God Himself.
[Jacob Sherrill is part of the Cubbies class in AWANA on Wednesday nights. Not too long ago, he was talking to his mom about church & how much he loved to come. As they talked, he was telling his mom about all the people at church he knew. & when he got to me, he said, “& Pastor Dennis – that’s Mrs. Patricia’s husband – he’s God.”
My point in telling that story is to say that, to Jacob Sherrill, I am a representative of God. & children should also hold that same view of their parents—they are God’s representatives—to teach, train, love & protect them!]
- & that view of parents really should not diminish w/the age of the children! We’re always to be there for our kids!
- Trust me; they won’t always do as you believe they should. But we should still be there for them to love them & teach them & train them & do our best to protect them so that they maintain that God representative view of their parents!
Conclusion: The Lord Jesus Himself is our example of obeying this commandment (Luke 2:51 says that Jesus was subject to Joseph & Mary; & in John 8:29 Jesus said, “I always do those things that please [the Father]). Children honor their parents when they love, respect, & obey them. Since all of us have parents, we must honor our parents all of our lives.
Invitation: Today I remind you that how you treat your parents is a direct reflection on how you treat God. I remind you that how you live your life directly reflects on your relationship to your parents’ authority & to God’s authority.
Do you sense God calling you to repentance over your lack of respect for His authority over you? Have you rejected His ways & His will by being disrespectful? Do you see God as holy & righteous & pure & just? & do you see yourself as unable to change the way you are now to something that may be acceptable to God? If so, would you cry out to Jesus & ask His forgiveness & seek to know Him?
Or maybe God has shown you an area of your life that is desperately out of His will – a place where you are struggling right now in your life. Would you be free from that today? Would you come to Jesus & surrender it to Him? Would you lay down your life that you may take up His & live it for His glory?
Or maybe God has given you the peace to know this is where He would have you to serve Him. Maybe you need to come to united w/this body of believers. Maybe you need to come to be baptized. Maybe you need to come & lift up a burden in prayer.
Whatever your need may be Jesus is here – come to Him.
Hymn 486 Lord, Here Am I