I Am No Longer My Own

I Am No Longer My Own Galatians 2:20 Here we are, at the end of another year. 2020 sure has been a year for the record books, and as this year ends, millions of people will be celebrating this New Year's Eve as they usher in what they hope will be a better 2021. Yes, 2020 has affected all of us, some more than others. So on this New Year's Eve, I want you to look back at this year and look forward to the one before you. As you reflect upon 2020 and anticipate 2021, ask yourself this question, "Who am I? What am I supposed to be?" That's the question that plagued 47-year-old Scott Bolzan. Back in 2010, he slipped and fell in the bathroom of his work, hitting his head and leaving him unconscious. He woke up in the hospital with an extreme case of what doctors call retrograde amnesia. This left Mr. Bolzan without any memory before his fall. Scott Bolzan said, "These are things I should remember. My first date, my first kiss with my wife, our wedding day, the birth of my children - all of those memories that everyone else in the whole world shares. These are things I know I should remember, but I don't, even when I look at pictures." He lost 46 years of his memory, and he was only 47! The last thing Mr. Bolzan remembers is slipping and falling. Just imagine what it must be like not being able to remember your entire life. 46 years of memories disappeared in an instant. And in the time it takes to slip and fall, who you are, your life, all vanished. "The best word I can use to describe it is just being lost," Bolzan said. "Because I lost who I am." My heart and prayers go out to Scott Bolzan, his wife, and his family. But his story illustrates something that everyone can sympathize with, being lost. Have you ever said something similar to Bolzan, "I lost who I am." It's easy to do, especially after tragic events such as COVID. Losing a loved one, worry, employment, fear, sadness, can all have a way of making you feel lost. But there is nothing quite like discovering who you really are. Some of the deepest questions you'll ever ask yourself is, "Who am I? Why am I here? What defines me? What am I supposed to be?" Oh, if only these questions could be answered by choosing where to live, what career to have, or whom to marry. But they're not that simple. Those questions go much deeper than that. They're about your identity and your purpose. They're questions you can ask in your middle-aged years, as you pass the halfway point in your life, and you begin to wonder how different you might live the second half of your life compared to the first. They're questions that you remember during your quiet, private moments when you struggle with if your public personality matches you who are on the inside. They're questions that comprise your true self, your personality, your history, values, uniqueness, and especially your relationship with God. And they're questions that we all need to be asking as we conclude our Christmas journey and look ahead to another year. Don't be too fast to disregard these questions. All of us have room to grow. After all, that's what a disciple is; it's someone who matures. These questions have value because you have value. Genesis 1:27 reminds us, "So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created them; male and female He created them." You were made in God's image, but the Bible says that image was broken because of sin, and there is nothing you could do or say to restore that broken image on your own merit. But because of Christ's great love for us, Jesus restored that image for "all who call upon His Name" (Romans 10:13). As 1 Corinthians 15:49 says, "And just as we have borne the image of the earthly man, so shall we bear the image of the heavenly man." You have value because you are made in God's image. Because Christ was born, lived, died, and rose again to restore that image. And because everyone who confesses Christ as Savior has become a child of God, you are worth far more than this world could ever offer. So today, offer God your entire heart, soul, body, and mind, because you are no longer your own, but God's. As our Covenant Prayer put's it, "I am no longer my own, but thine." That takes us to the importance of today's Scripture, "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me" (Galatians 2:20). Christians are those who have been crucified with Christ. You no longer live for yourself because Christ lives within you. It seems that every day and with every new year, the culture wants to define you. In that struggle, you may have wondered who you really are. But you need to remember only one thing: you belong to God! Your identity is found in God, whose image you're made in because you belong to God. You belong to God even when you're questioning God. When you're asking God what He wants you to do, what you're called to do, and why God has placed certain people in your life. "Put me to what thou wilt, rank me with whom thou wilt." As His disciples and His children, you belong to God because He commands you to "Go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit" (Matthew 28:19). You are to live and share your faith because Christ lives in you. As John Wesley said, you are to "Do all the good you can in all the places you can, in all the ways you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as ever you can" because Christ lives in you. You belong to God even when your life takes an unexpected turn. When you suffer from loss, hardship, or persecution. "Put me to doing, put me to suffering." There will be times in your life when you can't hear God's "still small voice" (1 Kings 19:12) anymore or even recognize how He is working in your life. There will be times when you're not sure if you are doing God's will. But you still belong to God because "Christ lives in you." "Let me be employed by thee or laid aside for thee." You belong to God when you're upon that mountain top or in the valley below. Whether your climbing your way up or stumbling back down that mountain, you belong to God. It doesn't matter if you feel on top of the world or if you're frustrated because it feels like your faith has cost you dearly, because as today's Scripture says, "The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me." As our Covenant Prayer says, "exalted for thee or brought low for thee." Sometimes, especially as another year ends and a new year begins, you can feel a void you're longing to fill. There can be regrets from the past year, dreams or goals unfulfilled, sinful actions or thoughts that took place, fears or hesitations that kept you stuck, and ambitious New Year's resolutions that haven't been met. But also, sometimes you feel like you're right where you should be. You're where God wants you, and you feel content with where you are and what you're doing. So, whether you're trying to fill a void or are content, you belong to God because you are "crucified with Christ." "Living by faith in the Son of God," "Let me be full, let me be empty." Life can take its toll on us. Perhaps more so this past year as COVID ravished our nation and this world. There are times when you have it all, and there are times when you have nothing. But remember, you have everything because you have been "crucified with Christ." "Let me have all things, let me have nothing." If you've honestly said and meant those words of our Covenant Prayer, that leaves you with only one right response: Surrender. "Freely and heartily yield all things to thy pleasure and disposal." Give all of yourself into the glory and blessing of our Lord and Savior, being careful to remember that no matter what, "thou are mine, and I am thine." Let that conviction and truth of being "crucified with Christ" remind you of who you are and guide you into the new year. Who you are and what you're supposed to be are in Christ. "And the covenant which you have made on earth, let it be ratified in heaven." AMEN A Covenant Prayer in the Wesleyan Tradition "I am no longer my own, but thine. Put me to what thou wilt, rank me with whom thou wilt. Put me to doing, put me to suffering. Let me be employed by thee or laid aside for thee, exalted for thee or brought low for thee. Let me be full, let me be empty. Let me have all things, let me have nothing. I freely and heartily yield all things to thy pleasure and disposal. And now, O glorious and blessed God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, thou art mine, and I am thine. So be it. And the covenant which I have made on earth, let it be ratified in heaven. Amen." "A Covenant Prayer in the Wesleyan Tradition," The United Methodist Hymnal (Nashville, TN: The United Methodist Publishing House, 1989), 607 2