Concerning Adultery

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Radical Christianity

Concerning Adultery

Goal: Clearly show that adultery is first an affaire of the mind and that Radical Christianity requires a total commitment to purity of mind and body.

Introduction

You can get a pretty good image of the change in our nation’s view of sexuality by looking at the change in television sitcoms over the past 50 years.

Dick Van Dyke show – Rob and Laura, although married had twin beds.

The Andy Griffith Show -

70’s - All in the Family,

Three’s Company,

90’s – Friends, Seinfeld

Today, The Office, Desperate Housewives

I have never been able to sit through an entire episode of neither Friends nor Seinfeld.

I have never even turned on the Office or Desperate Housewives.

I do not accept as valid the thought that you have to be familiar with what people are watching and listening to in order to relate to them. Let’s read today’s passage:

Matthew 5:27-30 27 ¶ "You have heard that it was said, 'YOU SHALL NOT COMMIT ADULTERY'; 28 but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 "If your right eye makes you stumble, tear it out and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 "If your right hand makes you stumble, cut it off and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to go into hell.

I. What the Law Taught, 27

A. The Ten Commandments, Ex. 20

1. The 10 Commandments are actually divided into two major sections.

a. The first 4 Commandments concern our relationship with God.

b. The last 6 concern our relationship with each other.

c. The commandments are easy to understand.

d. It’s not like God used some sort of imagery that we would have to figure out.

e. They are straight forward.

2. The 6th commandment, “You shall not murder” emphasizes all that has to do with the sanctity of life.

3. The 7th commandment “You shall not commit adultery,” protects the sanctity of marriage.

B. You shall not commit adultery, Ex. 20:14

1. The Heb word has the same meaning as the English word adultery.

a. Adultery is sexual intimacy between a man and a married or engaged woman.

2. The penalty for such a crime was death.

NAU Leviticus 20:10 ¶ 'If there is a man who commits adultery with another man's wife, one who commits adultery with his friend's wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death.

3. God even gave us the reason for such a severe penalty, Deut. 22:22

NAU Deuteronomy 22:22  thus you shall purge the evil from Israel.

a. The severity of the punishment was meant to deter others who might do the same thing.1

b. It is true that if punishment for a crime is meted out quickly it deters crime.

C. In the mind of Jesus’ listeners

1. The religious leaders of the day were teaching strict adherence to the Law.

2. You were allowed to hate someone as long as you did not murder them.

3. The logical outflow of that way of thinking is that you were allowed to fantasize about someone as long as you did not act on the fantasy.

4. The Pharisees did not teach that.2

4. Jesus continues, “but I say…”

5. This introduces Jesus “radical” teaching.

II. Jesus’ Expansion of the Teaching, 28

NAU Matthew 5:28 but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

A. To whom is Jesus talking?

1. Jesus takes the commandment and reveals God’s intent.

2. “I say to you that everyone…”

3. This is the Greek word pas and refers to the totality of any object.3

4. Here is refers without question to all men, married or not.

5. So let me talk to men

B. To Men

1. I would like all the men to read the verse 28 with me. (PPT slide)

a. What do you think Jesus is saying?

b. Jesus is saying that what you do in the recesses of your mind is just as much sin as actually committing the act itself.

2. A couple of key words

a. to look – to take notice, to become aware, to glance at.4

b. with lust – to greatly desire, to long for.5

c. Jesus is using “look” not in the sense of a quick glance and then turning away.

d. The “look” may have been quick, but the lust lingers.

e. In fact, “look” is in the present active tense and that speaks of an ongoing, continuous action.

f. I want to take a few minutes and talk to you about “looking.” I want to address the subject of pornography.

3. Pornography

a. In 2002 Steve Arterburn and Fred Stoeker wrote a book about their battle with and victory over pornography, Every Man’s Battle.

1. I think they chose a good title.

2. God created men in with a particular make up and He created women with a different make up.

3. Both sexes have their own battles.

b. Pornography and sexual perversion is not new.

1. You can not read the OT Scriptures without becoming aware of the sexual sin that ravaged the pagan cultures.

2. Think of Sodom and Gomorrah

3. In Paul’s writing to the Corinthians he addresses sexual sin, one that even pagans wouldn’t commit, where a man takes his father’s wife (1 Cor. 5).

c. In today’s world, however, there is easy access to pornography that didn’t exist in previous generations.

1. Think of the changes in our culture since the advent of movies & radio, to television and now the internet.

2. When movies first began you would have a story line coupled with a moral or ethical teaching.

a. Violence was not gratuitous.

b. There was a clear demarcation between good and evil.

c. You didn’t find yourself rooting for the bad guy.

d. Romantic elements were strictly censored.

e. You might remember the old Dick Van Dyke show where Rob and Laura, though married had twin beds.

3. Today, sexual images and innuendo are inserted even when totally unnecessary to the story.

a. Today’s movies at Cinemark

1. Sex and the City - (R:For strong sexual content, graphic nudity and language,)

2. Baby Mama – (PG-13:For crude and sexual humor, language and drug reference)

3. Forgetting Sarah Marshall – (R:For sexual content, language and some graphic nudity)

b. Television is not much better

1. You can’t sell anything without some sort of sexual innuendo.

2. You can hardly watch a program that is not filled with sexual garbage.

d. Pornography

1. In 2006 pornography was a $97 billion business worldwide.

2. That is larger than the revenues of the top technology companies combined: Microsoft, Google, Amazon, eBay, Yahoo!, Apple, Netflix and EarthLink.6

a. Every second - $3,075.64 is being spent on porn.

b. Every second - 28,258 Internet users are viewing pornography

c. Every 39 minutes: a new pornographic video is being created in the United States

3. Focus on the Family has published a small article about Children and Pornography.7

4. I’ve had copies made and parents can request it at the Welcome Center.

a. The article documents the pernicious activity of porn sites to hook our children.

4. Pornography’s hook

a. Look again at what Jesus says.

NAU Matthew 5:28 but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

1. Remember I said a key word was “look,”

2. Men in general are visual.

3. The eye gate is the passage way to the mind and heart.

4. Job said,

NLT Job 31:1 "I made a covenant with my eyes not to look with lust at a young woman.

b. Producers of pornography know that the hook is an image.

1. The Focus on the Family article states the 66% of all adult web sites have explicit images on their opening page, free to all.

2. Why would they do that?

3. Because the eye gate is the hook that ensnares and leads down the path to addiction.

4. Job knew that sin begins in the heart and that he was just as deserving of God’s punishment for looking at a woman lustfully as for committing adultery with her.

5. He therefore determined in advance to guard himself by making a pact with his eyes not to gaze at a woman who might tempt him.8

c. This brings me now to address the ladies.

1. I had asked Madeline to prepare this next portion but not wanting to offend anyone who would think it inappropriate for her to speak I decided to address it myself.

B. To Women

1. Just as men enjoy looking, women seem to enjoy being looked at.

a. This is an obvious truth attested to by the way some girls and women dress.

b. The dress is meant to draw attention to ones self.

NAU 1 Timothy 2:9 Likewise, I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly garments,

NLT 1 Timothy 2:9 And I want women to be modest in their appearance. They should wear decent and appropriate clothing and not draw attention to themselves by the way they fix their hair or by wearing gold or pearls or expensive clothes.

c. When was the last time, ladies, you heard anyone say anything about dressing modestly?

2. Modesty

a. Modesty when speaking about dress is referring to that sense of reserve in one’s appearance.

b. Modesty is very closely related to humility.

c. Dress that seeks to draw attention is a form of arrogance.

d. It says, “Look at me, I’m something to behold.”

e. But the Bible teaches us (both men and women) that “God resists the proud and gives grace to the humble.”

3. Madeline wrote this for me:

I know that outward appearance does not always reflect the heart condition, but, we ladies need to be teaching our daughters how to dress correctly and also to be giving them a good example. They need to know that how they dress DOES really effect the fellas-----and we need to show our girls by example, not just talk.

As you or your daughters head out the door, try to look at yourselves through the eyes of a young man.........

is the neckline -down too low,?

is the skirt too short?

is the garment so snug that it leaves nothing to the imagination?

Are the slacks or pants down to ‘there’ and the top up to ‘there

If you can answer “yes” to any of this, then you need to do a wardrobe adjustment. What message are you conveying with your apparel? Where is the emphasis and why? We need to guard as precious the special body God gave to us and that means not putting it on ‘display’ in an improper manner.

To live a pure life for the Lord is hard enough, but this is one area in which we do have some control, and with the Lord’s help it can help our brothers in the Lord in their battle to also remain pure.

4. Our Girls

a. We have two daughters.

b. They were simply not allowed to wear anything we thought inappropriate.

c. We would explain why, but there was no debate.

d. As children or teens they did not know the consequences of their actions and as parents our responsibility was to teach them Christian modesty.

e. It was not legalism because modesty is not legalism.

f. But it wasn’t open for debate either.

Now let’s look at the end of Jesus teaching.

III. The Radical Steps to be Taken, 29-30

Matthew 5:29-30 29 "If your right eye makes you stumble, tear it out and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 "If your right hand makes you stumble, cut it off and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to go into hell.

A. Pluck out your eye; cut off your hand

1. Jesus is using hyperbole to get His point across.

a. He is not in anyway legitimatizing self mutilation.

b. History is filled with examples of men who tried all sorts of extremes to rid themselves of that inner lust.

2. Stumble

a. Skandalizo basically means to cause to fall.

b. Metaphorically it is used of anything that traps us or that causes us to fall into sin or to stay in sin.

c. Jesus’ teaching is clear anything that will cause you to sin should be eliminated quickly.

d. Sin must be dealt with radically.

e. The Apostle Paul wrote in 1 Cor:

“I buffet my body and make it my slave, lest possibly, after I have preached to others, I myself should be disqualified” (1 Cor. 9:27).

Conclusion

Practical Ways to Guard your Eyes

Remember Job,

NLT Job 31:1 "I made a covenant with my eyes not to look with lust at a young woman.

1. Make a commitment to God that you will not defile yourself by what you look at!

a. You’ve got the verse in Job.

b. You’ve got the example of Daniel

NAU Daniel 1:8 ¶ But Daniel made up his mind that he would not defile himself with the king's choice food or with the wine which he drank; so he sought permission from the commander of the officials that he might not defile himself.

c. If I have not determined what I will do when temptation comes there is a far greater potential to yielding to sin.

2. Flee Temptation

NAU 2 Timothy 2:22 Now flee from youthful lusts and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.

NLT 2 Timothy 2:22 Run from anything that stimulates youthful lusts.

a. Flee means to turn and run.

b. Remember what Joseph did when Potipher’s wife tempted him.

c. He ran away.9

3. Choose carefully what you allow to enter your mind through your eyes.

a. We will see this verse in a couple of weeks but Matthew 6:23 says:

NAU Matthew 6:23 "But if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light that is in you is darkness, how great is the darkness!

b. There is this idea among some Christians that you need to know what people are watching in order to meet them where they are at.

c. That simply is not true.

d. In fact the teaching of both the Old and New Testaments is consistent.

e. We are not to put ourselves in a position where we can be tempted to sin. Period!

f. This means that what you watch on television, the videos you rent, the movies you go to, even the music you listen to has to be critically examined.

4. Be deliberate in what you allow your mind to dwell on.

a. Lust takes place in the mind.

b. Phil. 4:8 gives us the biblical means for controlling the way we think:

NAU Philippians 4:8 ¶ Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.

Can you imagine the impact on this country if every born again Christian lived out the teaching of these 4 verses?

Before that can happen there has to be an acknowledgement that I cannot continue to do as I have been doing.

Maybe the issue is that you have never truly come to the Lord Jesus Christ and sought His forgiveness of sin.

Maybe you never have accepted that in your life this is a problem.

Let God’s Spirit speak to you today.

1 OnlineBible, Deut. 22:22, Gill’s notes

2 Barclay, Wm., The Gospel of Matthew, Vol. 1, pg 144

3 BibleWorks 7, Matt. 5:28, everyone, Louw-Nida

4 ibid, look

5 Ibid, lust

6 http://www.familysafemedia.com/pornography_statistics.html

7 http://www.family.org/socialissues/A000001155.cfm

8 QuickVerse, Matt. 5:28, MacArthur Commentary, ch. 28

9 Gen 39:1-18

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