SF714 - BUILDING A MARRIAGE THAT WILL STAND - HOME IMPROVEMENT DISCOVERING GODS BLUEPRINT FOR THE FAMILY (Matthew 19 1-6)
Matthew 19:1-12
Introduction
It used to be that the air was clean and sexual immorality was dirty
Divorce has become pandemic, to the point that hardly a person can be found who has not been affected by it either directly or indirectly.
Each year in the United States there are well over one million divorces, and beneath the rubble of those numbing statistics lie the crushed lives of men, women, and children. For every million divorces, there are two million adults and several more million children who are directly involved.
This message is directed to those who are married or have yet to be married. This is not a condemnation of those who have suffered through divorce. We must teach our children God’s standards to protect them from the disaster of immorality.
Background
Representing the liberal Pharisaic view was rabbi Hillel. He taught that a man could divorce his wife for the most trivial of reasons, for such things as taking her hair down in public or talking to other men and even for burning the bread or putting too much salt in the food. For her to speak ill of her mother-in-law or to be infertile were more than sufficient grounds for divorce.
At the other extreme was an opposing and much less influential faction of rabbis, represented by a certain Shammai, who maintained that divorce was never permissible.
1A. The Foundation for a Lasting Marriage (19:4-5)
1B. The primacy of the marriage (19:4)
God ordained marriage in the Garden of Eden
Ø Marriage is the first institution ordained by God
Marriage did not originate with man
God created one man for one woman.
In the Hebrew text of Genesis 1:27, both male and female are in the emphatic position, giving the sense of “the one male and the one female.”
2B. The priority of the marriage (19:5a)
The Hebrew word (dabaq) behind joined to refers to a strong bonding together of objects and often was used to represent gluing or cementing.
Parents are to be honored but they are not primary
Children are to be loved but they are not primary
Career/business is important but it is not primary
Mate to mate is the highest earthly relationship!
3B. The purpose marriage (19:5b)
Marriage is a designed to bring fulfillment
A husband and a wife are like a violin and bow.
Marriage is designed to bring enjoyment
Ø Family Research Council, 72% of married traditionalist reported sexual satisfaction. This was 33% higher than single non-traditionalist
Ø God gave us sex not only for procreation but for communion, joy and communication, and intimacy.
4B. The permanence marriage (19:6)
One man for one woman until death do them part!
2A. The Fidelity of a Lasting Marriage (19:7-9)
1B. Sexual Immorality is a sin against yourself
1 Corinthians 6:18 “Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body.”
The sin of immorality is unique - it is supremely harmful
Social diseases based in immorality
Ø Safe sex? - Sex was never meant to be dangerous
Ø Sex was meant to be sacred!
God forgives nature never does!
2B. Sexual Immorality is a sin against the home
The man who commits adultery tells his children…
Ø Your mother is not worth much.
Ø Your Father is a liar and cheat.
Ø Honor is not nearly as important as pleasure.
Ø My own satisfaction is more important than you.
Marital fidelity is the glue that holds society together
Ø No wonder Satan attacks the home!
3B. Sexual Immorality is a sin against the Church
Galatians 3:28 “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus.”
4B. Sexual Immorality is a sin against the Lord
Psalm 51:4 “Against You, You only, have I sinned, And done this evil in Your sight….”
When you commit sexual immorality, you break both God’s law and God’s heart
Exodus 20:14 "You shall not commit adultery.
Leviticus 20:10 “The man who commits adultery with another man's wife, he who commits adultery with his neighbor's wife, the adulterer and the adulteress, shall surely be put to death.”
1 Corinthians 6:9 “Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites”
Ø Law without penalty is just advice!
The day of judgement is yet to come…
Romans 2:5 “But in accordance with your hardness and your impenitent heart you are treasuring up for yourself wrath in the day of wrath and revelation of the righteous judgment of God”
3A. A Formula for a Lasting Marriage (19:10-12)
The disciples recognize the human impossibility of living up to the Lord’s standards.
1B. Decision - Decide that you are going to live for God!
2B. Dependence - Depend on the Lord completely!
1 Corinthians 10:13 “No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it.”
3B. Devotion - Love the Lord with all you are and your mate as yourself!
Ø A love for your mate comes from loving Christ!
4B. Development - Continue to feed your love from day to day!
Ø Love is like a flower that must be cultivated, protected, and developed.
Ø You should love your wife more today than you did when you married her.
5B. Discipline - Guard where you go and what you see.
Ø You would not put garbage in your mouth do not put it in your mind.
“He who would not fall down ought not to walk in slippery places.” A. Rogers
6B. Determination - Be determined to make your marriage last!!
Psalm 119:112 “I have inclined my heart to perform Your statutes Forever, to the very end.”
Application
What do we do?
Recognize that we are already condemned
John 3:17-18 “For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved. 18 "He who believes in Him is not condemned; but he who does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.”
We cry out to God for mercy!
Luke 18:13 “And the tax collector, standing afar off, would not so much as raise his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, 'God, be merciful to me a sinner!”
We cast ourselves on God’s mercy.
Matthew 11:28 “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”
We obey Christ’s command to repent and believe
Mark 1:14 -15 “Now after John was put in prison, Jesus came to Galilee, preaching the gospel of the kingdom of God, and saying, ‘The time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God is at hand. Repent, and believe in the gospel.’”
We rely on God’s grace and strength
Philippians 4:13 “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”
Matthew 19:1-12
1A. The Foundation for a Lasting Marriage (19:4-5)
1B. The ___________________ of the marriage (19:4)
God ordained marriage in the Garden of Eden
Marriage did not originate with man
God created one man for one woman.
2B. The __________________ of the marriage (19:5a)
Parents are to be honored but they are not primary
Children are to be loved but they are not primary
Career/business is important but it is not primary
Mate to mate is the highest earthly relationship!
3B. The _______________________ marriage (19:5b)
Marriage is a designed to bring fulfillment
Marriage is designed to bring enjoyment
4B. The ________________________ marriage (19:6)
One man for one woman until death do them part!
2A. The Fidelity of a Lasting Marriage (19:7-9)
1B. Sexual Immorality is a sin against _____________ (1 Corinthians 6:18)
The sin of immorality is unique - it is supremely harmful
2B. Sexual Immorality is a sin against the __________
Marital fidelity is the glue that holds society together
3B. Sexual Immorality is a sin against the __________ (Galatians 3:28)
4B. Sexual Immorality is a sin against the __________ (Psalm 51:4)
When you commit sexual immorality, you break both God’s law and God’s heart (Exodus 20:14; Leviticus 20:10; 1 Corinthians 6:9)
Ø Law without penalty is just advice!
The Day of Judgment is yet to come (Romans 2:5)
3A. A Formula for a Lasting Marriage (19:10-12) (1 Corinthians 10:13)
3B. ___________________ - Love the Lord with all you are and your mate as yourself!
4B. Development - Continue to feed your love from day to day!
5B. __________________ - Guard where you go and what you see.
6B. Determination - Be determined to make your marriage last!! (Psalm 119:112)
Application
What do we do?
Recognize that we are already condemned (John 3:17-18)
We cry out to God for mercy! (Luke 18:13)
We cast ourselves on God’s mercy. (Matthew 11:28)
We obey Christ’s command to repent and believe (Mark 1:14 -15)
We rely on God’s grace and strength (Philippians 4:13)
