Celebrating Love
Notes
Transcript
2 Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth— For your love is better than wine.
Love is expressed biblically in different ways:
Agape Love expresses a selfless type of love, and is used in expressing God’s love for sinners.
16 For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.
Filial love expresses a deep desire and accompanies intimacy. It is a feeling love.
25 He who loves his life will lose it, and he who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.
Erotic love is more obscure and never used in the scriptures. It has been described as illicit love or a purely sexual and devious in it’s nature.
There has been much written on the first two, and perhaps more effort to differentiate the subtle nuances of both.
Yet, I believe that the two (agape & phileo), are better expressed as complimentary to each other.
In fact, the apostle John uses both inter changeably more than any of the synoptic writers.
John uses filial love to express the Father’s love for the Son:
20 For the Father loves the Son, and shows Him all things that He Himself does; and He will show Him greater works than these, that you may marvel.
John uses filial love to express the love of the Father to us who are in Christ:
27 for the Father Himself loves you, because you have loved Me, and have believed that I came forth from God.
John uses both agape and filial when Jesus asks Peter three times if he loves Him:
15 So when they had eaten breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me more than these?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” He said to him, “Feed My lambs.” 16 He said to him again a second time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” He said to him, “Tend My sheep.” 17 He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?” Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, “Do you love Me?” And he said to Him, “Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You.” Jesus said to him, “Feed My sheep.
We also find that in only one place in the N.T. that we are called to express filial love for Jesus:
22 If anyone does not love the Lord Jesus Christ, let him be accursed. O Lord, come!
And so from these verses, we can conclude that we are to love unconditionally and with affection.
But let us also notice that the third type of love, EROS, comes from the Greek god EROS, the god of passion and physical attraction.
It has been abused by sinful mankind since the fall, yet can be pure if it is reserved for the place it was designed for.
It is here expressed in our text today, and throughout the book of the Song of Solomon.
Passages like verse 2 and others show EROS even in the use of PHILEO and AGAPE.
Many have shunned these expressions of love, because they do not see them as viable in the Christian life.
And yet, God has seen fit to include them in His Holy Word.
I. Love is intoxicating.
I. Love is intoxicating.
“Your love is better than wine”.
This cannot be agape as expressed as only a selfless intentional love, because the Shulamite (young Palestinian woman) is here expressing desire.
A. It is kept in check despite it’s affect.
A. It is kept in check despite it’s affect.
No where in the discourse of this book is the exchange of love ever outside the boundaries of marriage. The Hebrew pronouns change back and forth, making it difficult to understand who is doing what. But, it is always pure.
It is the same with our desires. We must as God’s people keep them in check!
This is also one of the fruits of the Spirit - Self Control.
B. It has the ability to control the physical body.
B. It has the ability to control the physical body.
We do not need to look very far to see the destructive elements, as we see sexual sin destroying many a prominent Christian leader.
However, in the covenant of marriage, it is altogether wonderful, and part of what keeps one’s eyes in their own backyard.
15 Drink water from your own cistern, And running water from your own well.
This verse and the ones following it speak of fidelity in marriage.
Why do we need fidelity?
Because God knows the power that sensual love has over us, and His plan is to intoxicate each spouse with the other.
II. Love is passionate.
II. Love is passionate.
The absence of passion in a relationship cultivates deadness.
Now, there are degrees of passion.
Not all relationships have the same passion, but there should be passion.
The problem as I see it, is that people have watched too many movies or read to many graphic novels that depict an insatiable type of passion that compared to their own lives, sets the bar too high and guarantees failure.
So, what do I mean by passion?
Well,
Passion is what shuts the mouth of someone who just said something degrading to your wife.
Passion, is in the face of a mother as she disciplines her child, so they don’t grow up to be a derelict.
Passion is driving home from work singing silly love songs at the top of your lungs because you just can’t get her out of your mind.
Passion is shopping for that tool you know he can’t live without.
Passion works hard so that you can provide comfort and security for your spouse.
Passion is cooking their favorite meal just because.
But passion is giving her a kiss, not like a chicken pecking at a seed, but grabbing her with both arms tilting her back just a bit and planting one on her that makes her gasp for breath afterward.
III. Love is a bond.
III. Love is a bond.
The design of the sensual, emotional, and selfless love, is to provide a bonding property in the relationship.
It is the same in every relationship, yet not without boundaries.
A. In the church.
A. In the church.
Why the church is week today is because there is not that strong bond that was evident in the early church.
We do not meet daily, breaking bread from house to house.
We do not reconcile differences we have.
We do love one another with the true love God expects.
B. In friendships.
B. In friendships.
We need to be accountable to each other.
We must love the other better than ourselves.
We must not backbite or talk about our friend behind their back.
We must share ourselves with them.
C. In marriage.
C. In marriage.
here and only here, is sexual desire permitted, as it is the bond and that which makes two one.
24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
It is also repeated in Matt 19:5; Mark 10:8; 1 Cor 6:16; and Eph 5:31.
When this bonding property is used illicitly outside of marriage, it produces confusion and frustration.
The Apostle Paul shows the destructive side of this principal in...
16 Or do you not know that he who is joined to a harlot is one body with her? For “the two,” He says, “shall become one flesh.”
IV. Love is work.
IV. Love is work.
There’s a term in the Old Testament. It’s used a lot in the Old King James version. It’s called backsliding.
Backsliding is not good. It means one has slid away from God.
But, to properly understand what it looks like, you need to know how it was applied in the Jewish custom.
It is like a young bull or cow walking up a steep hill in the mud. As long as the animal is moving forward it is making progress. But if it stops, it begins to slide backwards, loosing ground.
This is the picture of a believer who stops following Jesus, stops pressing forward everyday in his or her walk with the Lord. As soon as they stop, they begin to loose ground.
In marriage, it is the same way!
If you stop trying, stop loving, stop being intoxicated, stop the passion, allow the bond to loosen, you will drift apart.
When someone says we’ve drifted apart, or I just don’t feel it like I used to, mark it down, they’ve stopped trying.
conclusion:
Let me leave you with the verse we began with today:
2 Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth— For your love is better than wine.
Maybe it’s been a while for you and your spouse, perhaps the kisses of their mouth are not better than wine.
Brush your teeth.
Use a breath mint.
Shine up the exterior and make a new game plan.
18 Let your fountain be blessed, And rejoice with the wife of your youth.
The next verse is one of my favorites in the scriptures, but I will not read it out loud. I’ll let you read it for yourself.
19 As a loving deer and a graceful doe, Let her breasts satisfy you at all times; And always be enraptured with her love.