Eye love you Valentine, and that's the Tooth

Happy Valentines Day! I hope you all have gotten your candy hearts, your chocolates and sappy cards already.

A few weeks ago I saw a post that said Valentines Day when you’re dating is dinner, flowers, chocolate, and gifts. Valentines Day when you are newly married is breakfast in bed, flowers, and romantic music. Valentines Day when you have been married for years is going to the store, picking out cards, reading them in the aisle and then putting them back for the next couple!!

The world has some ideas about love, and the message that it sends is communicated through movies, TV, songs, and other mainstream ideas. As many of you know, I wrote my master’s thesis on music and faith, and a big part of my research and presentation was based on the unhealthy expectations many people have of marriage and love because the influence of music and lyrics in songs.

As Christians our ideas of love should be first and foremost formed by the Scriptures. The Bible has a lot to say about love, starting from the foundation of 1 John 4 that tells us GOD IS LOVE.

For today I want to look at Matthew 5- in the midst of the Sermon on the Mount, when Jesus talks about love. The kind of love that Jesus speaks of in this text is not chocolates and candy hearts for the one’s we love- this is the love for enemies that the Bible instructs us to have. in the midst of his teaching that day Jesus asks a very pointed question in v46 “For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same?” Jesus asks us to evaluate our treatment of others using this lens, perhaps today he would ask “You celebrate Valentine’s Day; well even those who do not know me do that”

Worldly ideas of love are obsessed with sex, physical attraction, infatuation, and merit-based relationships. But the Bible teaches us that the love of God, and the love we are to have for one another is to be obsessed with grace, mercy, forgiveness, and goodness.

First, Jesus says, Christian love should never respond with revenge, rage, retaliation, or rubbish. He speaks of this in terms of eyes, teeth, cloaks, tunics, carrying and borrowing.

The Bible’s teaching on an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth is some of the most misunderstood Scripture in the Bible. Many have come to believe that this Scripture is justifying revenge or retaliation- that God is saying that if someone does us wrong, we are fine to do wrong back, but that is not what God had in mind in Exodus 21 when he spoke these words. What God was doing is trying to prevent undue or unjust punishment for crimes- that when punishment is necessary, make sure the punishment fits the offense.

For example, in Genesis 34 we read of a man named Shechem kidnapped and defiled a woman named Dinah, and in retaliation her brothers went into his tribe and slaughtered every male in the tribe- extreme to say the least. The sin of this one man should not have cost innocent people their lives. Jesus is not saying “GO RETALIATE! He is saying, if you give a punishment, make sure it is fair and just and not overreaching and overly-harmful. May our justice communicate love, not evil.

Jesus also talks to us about when someone unjustifiably tries to take something from us- if someone sues you for your tunic, then give them your outer cloak as well. This is referring to the inner and outer garments that most Jewish men would have worn. This more than just saying do no resist, this is saying submit if you need too. Even when it feels like someone is being overbearing in what they are asking you to do. Do not return their threat with rage, for our God is not a God of rage. He is a God of mercy, and that's who we should strive to be too. If someone asks you to go 1 miles, go 2- go over and beyond the call- even if it inconveniences you.

This is the model of Jesus. Listen to Paul’s words in Phil 3:17-21

English Standard Version Chapter 3

17 Brothers, join in imitating me, and keep your eyes on those who walk according to the example you have in us. 18 For many, of whom I have often told you and now tell you even with tears, walk as enemies of the cross of Christ. 19 Their end is destruction, their god is their belly, and they glory in their shame, with minds set on earthly things. 20 But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, 21 who will transform our lowly body to be like his glorious body, by the power that enables him even to subject all things to himself.

It is hard for some of us to conceptualize the idea of being an enemy of the cross, because we have never overtly waged war on Jesus. The measurement many think about is religious extremism, when people openly attack Christians or people of faith in God, but that is not what Paul says here. Paul’s description of enemies of the cross can seem quite harmless on the surface, but in the hearts of the people engaged in the behavior the behavior is quite destructive.

Paul tells us that those who do not walk with Jesus, those who have their minds set on Earthly things and allow their belly- in other words their own desires- walk as enemies of the cross. So, if you have ever lived you life allowing your own desires, or your own pleasure, to be the thing that drives all your decisions, if you have ever ived your life with the mind set on only Earthly things like pleasure, wealth, and power- you have been an enemy to the cross of Jesus.

And what did Jesus do for enemies of the cross? Wage war on them? Retaliate against them? Harm and hurt them?

Romans 5:8 “but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

Jesus’ response to our enmity with the holiness of God is self sacrificing death. He chose to lay his own life down in order to restore relationship with us. Even before we returned the love he has for us, he laid his life down.

Sir Walter Scott had difficulty with the idea of “turning the other cheek.” But Jesus’ words took on special meaning one day when Scott threw a rock at a stray dog to chase it away. His aim was like a baseball pitchers and he hit the animal and broke its leg. Instead of running off, the dog limped over to him and licked his hand. Sir Walter never forgot that touching response. He said, “That dog preached the Sermon on the Mount to me as few ministers have ever presented it.” Scott said he had not found human beings so ready to forgive their enemies.

What Jesus is calling us too in this passage is a different treatment of those who have done us wrong. Instead of revenge, retaliation, rage, or rubbish- the Scriptures call us, followers of Christ to respond with kindness, compassion, and care- whenever we can

Jesus’ command for us is to “turn the other cheek” when someone wrongs us; let’s talk about where we get this wrong, and how we can adjust our thinking and behavior.

What we get wrong- Jesus is not calling for abolishing police forces and military; he is not calling for us to embrace world peace at all costs, and he is not calling for Christians to stay in abusive situations.

What he is calling for is a resistance of private retaliation, and a embracing of public order. He is asking us to trust that he will avenge our wrongs- either here or in eternity. When Jesus says turn the other cheek, he is not saying allow them to keep hurting you- he is saying do not seek your own revenge.

What we get wrong- Jesus is not calling for complete nonresistance, or asking us to allow wrongdoing to go free.

What is calling us to is fair justice- that the punishment fit the offense and that we advocate for humane treatment for all people- even if they are our enemies. For example, I am involved in a justice renewal initiative with some other pastors- and one of the things that we advocated for a few years ago was better cleaning procedures in jails. After reviewing cases and data we saw many cases where prisons were not being cleaned properly, and that many inmates were getting sick and infections from the dirty facilities. We did not advocate for them to be released, or to be set free- no, they needed to serve their time, but they did not need to do so in grotesque living conditions, they are still human beings, and deserve clean living space. This is a practical way that some of the pastors in this area were “turning the other cheek”

What we get wrong- thinking that our rights as citizens of the USA and our rights as citizens of heaven are the same.

Just because we have certain rights as citizens of the USA; does not mean those are right in the Kingdom of God. Sometimes we need to lay down our perceived rights for the good of the Kingdom of God. We are all humans and struggle with sin and brokenness. When someone wrongs me, my flesh wants to see them punished to the full extent of the law- but many times that is not what God wants for them. If I believe that God is in charge of all the affairs on this Earth, then I need to trust that God will initiate his plan for justice.

Romans 12:19 says “Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath. For it is written: ‘It is mine to avenge: I will repay, says the Lord.’” This is clear instruction that we are not to take revenge into our own hands. We may not like what has been done to us, but we do not have the power to settle the score. God further instructs us in Romans 12:20 when he says “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”

So, you gave a Valentine to the one’s you love today- even the pagans do that, says the Lord. But, do you have an enemy or someone you are in conflict with today that you can show love to. Someone you can forgive, someone you can bless, someone you can stand up for or speak out in support of- even if they are enemies in the eyes of the world; we are all neighbors in the Kingdom of God.

Telios- Perfect, Mature