RECOVERING YOUR MARRIAGE 3 - OVERCOMING ANGER AND BITTERNESS

SCRIPTURE: 1 Samuel 30:21-25 Introduction - Pastor George * Among the people who recovered there were some who were described as "the wicked and worthless[c] men" ("worthless men" means "men of Belial" per footnotes). 1 Samuel 30:22 * Born again and blessed people can have character flaws just like Eno Jerry, which can be destructive to our marriages and so must be dealt with if we are to recover our marriages. Pastor Julia What Is Anger? * Anger is a feeling of displeasure that a person experiences. It is natural and normal to feel angry. Anger is a natural emotion but if not managed, checked, or controlled can lead to bigger issues because it is not supposed to linger. Ephesians 4:26 * So if you're an angry spouse, what you do in your moments of anger will most likely negatively impact your marriage. Eno's Anger Issues: * It was difficult to hold meaningful conversations with her husband. She misunderstood his intentions and got very angry and had difficulty accepting corrections from people with the best intentions. * Her case was so bad that as soon as he is recovering from one episode of her many tantrums, one follows immediately, though not deliberate. So they were caught in a cycle. How to Overcome Anger and A Few Tips: * Understanding is key. Eno never understood in the past what her husband meant whenever he spoke to her about becoming a better person. Proverbs 4:7. * She wanted to remain in her set ways which, she believes many people can relate to. We get so used to being us that we don't want to become "other people" but if we understand Proverbs 4:18, then we will know that we're supposed to be improved versions of ourselves. It Was More About Her: * We need to get to that point where we see growth and change as being more about us and for our benefit. She Asked Her Husband for Help: * We shouldn't be too proud to ask for help from loved ones. Allow them to hold us accountable as we take a journey to becoming better people with the help of the Holy Spirit. I Took Practical Steps: * I was deliberate in my discussions with my spouse and I listened to myself during conversations. I listened more rather than wanting to be heard. I was Tutored: * My husband was my teacher. He taught me how to respond to situations. When to speak and when to hold back. I learnt that my anger issue is because things don't go my way. I Became More Aware of My Weakness And More Open To Corrections: * By seeing humor in the midst of anger, learning to relax (don't take life too seriously), building trust, listening effectively, and being assertive. Ephesians 4:31-32 Bitterness: * Anger if aloud to linger for a long time turns to bitterness. Bitterness is dangerous and can take root and grow. It can defile your heart and spirit before you realize it. How To Avoid Bitterness: * Be deliberate in showing love to others. Be quick to confess how you feel James 5:16a.. * Keep a positive and thankful outlook on life and guard your thoughts Prov 4:23. * Take things as being from the Lord. Rom 8:28. * Bitterness is a major enemy to our marriage, and if we remain stuck in it, we might destroy the very fabric of our marriage 1 Cor 7:3. Conclusion - Pastor George * David's sin was sexual immorality and being so selfish he was willing to kill to cover up his sin. Let us make his confession in Psalm 51 a model of dealing with our sins that destroy our marriages. * He take full responsibility for and acknowledges his sins and uses "me", "my" and "I", ten times in Psalm 51:1-3 * He says God is justified in judging him. Psalm 51:4 * He admits he was born with his problem and it was in his inner parts.. Psalm 51:5-7 * He admits he had a heart problem and needed a new heart and spirit. Psalm 51:10 * He acknowledges that he had a sin or character problem even though he was in the presence of God and had the Holy Spirit. Psalm 51:11 * Let us pray this Psalm this week to be free from the sins that destroy our maariages so that our marriages will be restored. To schedule appointment, please send text to 301.442.4583 OR Email: appointment@agapelifeonline.org Thanks, Pastor George