Pearls and Pigs

When you are a minister, you get lots of calls for help. LOTS of calls.

You try to use discernment, because you obviously can’t help everyone. Recently, I received a call from a retired social worker asking if I could do anything for a former client—a young man in need of help. I agreed to meet with the young man, and I heard his sad story of bad family relationships and poor decisions that had led him to this point in his life. After some prayerful consideration, I felt that God wanted me to try to help him. After all, he seemed to be trying to get his life together.

But all too quickly, a problem became apparent. Once I began helping, it seemed that he no longer felt it necessary to work on his problems. There was always another opportunity he needed to really change. But every opportunity for REAL change was rejected. Finally, I had to tell him that I was unable to help.

He was angry. He tried to make it my fault that he was suffering. But the fact was that he didn’t want to fix his life; he just wanted someone to blame for the mess he was in.

As a Christian, I try to be an imitator of Christ. He fed the hungry, healed the sick, and restored the hurting. That’s what I try to be for others—a source of help. But I also have to note that Jesus wasn’t about giving people what they wanted, but rather what they NEEDED.

Luke 5:17-26 tells the story of a paralytic man that was brought to Jesus, who was teaching in a house at that moment. “... but finding no way to bring him in, because of the crowd, they went up on the roof and let him down with his bed through the tiles into the midst before Jesus.  And when he saw their faith, he said, “Man, your sins are forgiven you” (Luke 5:19-20, ESV). While the story goes on to show Jesus healing the man’s legs, the fact is that Jesus perceived the real need of that man was not to walk, but rather to know that he was right with God.

When it comes to really helping someone like the young man who came into my life, we have to acknowledge our limitations. It’s easy to give food, provide a bed, or clean clothes. But real help is something only the Holy Spirit can do, and then the person has to be willing to accept that help. Matthew 7:6 says, “Do not give dogs what is holy, and do not throw your pearls before pigs, lest they trample them underfoot and turn to attack you.” When you try to make yourself someone’s savior, instead of pointing them to THE Savior, it never ends well

Does that absolve me from trying to help? No. But it does free me, knowing that I don’t have the power to fix people. It comforts me, knowing that God doesn’t expect me to fix people. That’s His job, and He is very good at it.

So I have to accept that I have done all I can to help this young man. Anything more I would try to do would only hinder his journey to finding REAL help. But I can pray for him—and I do with all my heart— that God will open his eyes to his real need lead him to real answers. To God be the glory.