Share, Show, Shine
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This morning I want to take the opportunity as your Pastor to speak on love and relationships. I was gone on Valentine’s Sunday, hoping you enjoyed the Focus on the Family ministry I had planned before we were going to be gone.
I would like to speak into your lives in a practical way regarding ANY relationship, but especially marriage - that is regarding love.
LOVE is the most important, greatest of commands we see in Scripture.
7 Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God.
37 Jesus replied, “ ‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’
38 This is the first and greatest commandment.
39 A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’
13 Three things will last forever—faith, hope, and love—and the greatest of these is love.
Jesus was the greatest demonstration of love - unconditional love at that, the world will ever know...
8 But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.
13 There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.
This love that loved us when we were in our most ugly and sinful state, and yet died for us - is a powerful display...
Paul spoke of this love of Christ for the church when he spoke to Christian husband’s loving their wives!
25 For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her
From this basis of love, I want us to look at three of the most important characteristics we must display in loving others. Especially our spouses, but this can equally be applied to friends, family members, and even enemies!!!
1. SHARE IT
1. SHARE IT
Love is to be expressed!
Our society has very casually learned to say the words - “Love Ya” -
Even though they have often become carelessly and often insincerely used, there is a powerful message we need to understand.
People need to hear they are loved!!!
Children need to hear they are loved, friends need to hear they are loved, the lost need to hear they are loved, AND
Spouses, YOUR SPOUSE, needs to hear you love them!!!
There is no replacement for the words - “I Love YOU!”
9 “I have loved you even as the Father has loved me. Remain in my love.
10 When you obey my commandments, you remain in my love, just as I obey my Father’s commandments and remain in his love.
11 I have told you these things so that you will be filled with my joy. Yes, your joy will overflow!
12 This is my commandment: Love each other in the same way I have loved you.
JESUS is expressing His love to his disciples in this passage - and he says why - so you will know JOY!
When we SHARE our love for our spouse, kids, friends with sincerity we are filling their lives with JOY!
You might say my spouse knows I love them, my kids know I love them, but there is something that occurs when you SHARE IT VERBALLY!!!
Scripture teaches us to build one another up and encourage one another - we know that WORDS have power to communicate that encouragement, and there are no more effective WORDS than to say I LOVE YOU!
You need to share those words with your spouse, your kids, and even your friends.
When words sincerely come out of your person, your innermost person, they have power to give life and hope.
21 The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences.
18 Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing.
Even Romans 10 tells us the important of verbally declaring the message of God’s love and His power to save - calling the feet of those who spread that good news to be beautiful....
Our families, spouses, kids, friends, need to hear the NEWS that we love them, just like they need to hear the news that Jesus loves them. It is replicating and fulfilling our role as disciples of Christ to SHARE that love in message and expression!
2. SHOW IT
2. SHOW IT
Of course words being powerful, need to be backed by behavior!!!
We can never use our behavior as an excuse to not share our words of love, but we also cannot use our words of love as an empty expression that is not backed by our actions!
8 But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.
God showed, or DEMONSTRATED His love...
The Scriptures we opened up with all declare the love of God by sending JESUS who DIED for us...
HIs love was not just declared, but demonstrated, Jesus himself said, no greater love has anyone than this, to lay down one’s life for his friends...
What do we do to show our love for our wives, husbands, kids...
The action of:
- working to provide,
- the demonstration of loving non-sexual touch,
- the gestures of doing tasks that meet another’s needs, cleaning, cooking, maintenance
- the handwritten note,
- taking one out to spend quality time,
- treating with tenderness and not harshness (one does not bring physical harm to those they love - husband’s Christ never beat you, so don’t beat your wife!) Parent - there is a difference between discipline and abuse, discipline is never a response of anger,
What are we doing to SHOW our love for those in our lives. Have we discovered the love language of our spouse, kids, friends, and use their love language to express love to them.
We all want someone to use our love language when they express love to us..l
Five Love Languages:
Quality Time
Giving Gifts
Acts of Service
Words of Affirmation
Physical Touch (loving, non sexual, expressions)
It is important that we share with our spouse and our kids, even our friends their love language - it is easy to do for others OUR love language - but what feeds their need?
If someone has been abused and physical touch is difficult to receive, but receiving words of affirmation fills their love tank, guess what, stop touching and start speaking affirmation....
In this case it is not give like you want to receive, but give as they need to receive!!!
You’re loving them is showing them that it is not about your selfishness, but their need and you giving yourself for them!
We need to show this love unconditionally to our spouses, kids, friends and even enemies as Christ demonstrated His love toward us when we were enemies of righteousness.
3. SHINE IT
3. SHINE IT
Allow our love to be seen by all!!!
Do you realize that how you love is a cyclical pattern you set.
We learn to love from our parents, how they treat us and how they treated each other...
Thus why abuse repeats itself!
We have the power to change the patterns in our lives and that of our children and grandchildren...
9 Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good.
16 In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father.
Is there any better deed than demonstrating the love of God?
35 Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”
So, what is your marriage, your parenting, and your friendship demonstrating to the world???
Those without Christ are watching you, just as your next generation is watching you...
We are training up a child in the way they should go when we are demonstrating our love for each other… not matter if that is marital, parental, sibling, or friendship...
Our lives impact others and are a witness to the lost how it is supposed to be..
That does not mean that love does not address wrong, or sin, or brings correction, etc. but it is how it is managed, handled and how we treat one another...
Our relationships were meant to shine… to train up the next generations in how to live like Christ wanted us to live… follow me as I follow Christ,
CONCLUSION
CONCLUSION
So, our take away this morning...
We need to:
Share It! - don’t use your personality as an excuse to not express that you love someone. People need to hear it, your spouse needs to hear it, your kids need to hear it, your friends need to hear it… expression of love for someone is affirming and encouraging and as Jesus says, it brings JOY!
Show it! - we cannot just use words that are not backed up by our actions, and showing our love means selflessly expressing our love the way those in our lives need to experience it. Not that we do not show it in our natural way, but also show it in their way.
Shine it! - our love testifies of the love of Christ! The world needs to see real love and we need to replicate that love in the next generation and with those first finding Christ.